Como é que se compreende um homem? Conselhos sobre relacionamentos que mudam o jogo

We always hear it… the famous phrase ”Os homens são tão simples.” We lead our lives believing this lie and confining men within the boundaries of their gender.

Did you forget that they’re human beings first? Eles são tão complexos como qualquer uma de nós, mulheres.

What do I mean by this? How can you understand a man? How can you know he’s the one for you?

So many questions and the answers seem so out of reach… but they’re not. If you keep reading, you will have them all… and much more!

How Do You Read A Man’s Mind?

You can’t read a man’s mind any more than they can read yours.

We’re not sorcerers with superpowers, just human beings who can’t know what the other is feeling unless we ask them.

Yes, that’s right. If you want to know a man’s thoughts, there is no other way but to openly comunicar com eles.

I know that scares you because we are used to repressing our feelings and acting like they don’t matter. But, they do. Your peace of mind is of primary importance, and it’s actually your duty to achieve it.

So, the next time you’re having doubts about a man, share them. What’ve you got to lose? O único resultado poderia ser uma relação mais amorosa (a menos que he’s too immature).

If you’re not in a relationship, though, you can still follow the same principle. Communication is ALWAYS key.

RELACIONADO: O que é que significa quando ele te chama Babe? (13 razões possíveis)

Como é que eu compreendo um homem? Dicas para ter em mente

Para compreender um homem, são necessárias duas coisas: uma mente aberta e empatia. Don’t stick to your old beliefs but rather expand your horizons and truly try to understand what’s hiding beneath the surface.

Now that we’ve established that, here’s what you need to know about the true nature of a man and how you need to act with him:

Nascido para ser o seu super-herói

Já reparou como um homem gosta de arranjar coisas para si?

Já reparou como ele se sente realizado quando cuida de si?

Bem, a isso chama-se instinto de herói.

Essencialmente, os homens são ensinados que o seu papel na vida é ser o seu cuidador. Quando não conseguem ajudá-la em tudo o que deseja, sentem-se fracassados.

As vozes do passado ressoam nos seus ouvidos e dizem-lhes: ”One day, you’re going to get married, and you’re going to have to provide for your wife.”

It’s difficult to abandon your core beliefs. What they tell men in childhood, that’s who they’re going to be. And I’m sure we know what’s expected of each gender.

Even when they know how wrong these expectations are, it is still engraved in their minds, and they can’t just change overnight.

Quando tentar compreender um homem, tenha isto em mente e ajude-o a ultrapassar o problema. Mas não satisfaça, em circunstância alguma, os seus desejos grandiosos de ser o seu herói. Tu és o teu próprio herói. Nunca te esqueças disso.

Ele veio, ele viu, ele conquistou

What men want most is victory. It doesn’t matter what the final prize is as long as they have it. It can be a job promotion…or you.

Porque é que isto é importante?

Well, it’s because the things men do aren’t without an explanation or cause. And, if they have a cause, they can be stopped.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Being ambitious and wanting to win is great. However, if this becomes their primary drive in life, that’s a problem.

You wouldn’t want to be one of his prizes, right? I’m sure you had another label in mind.

Well, then understand that this, too, stems from the childhood stories they listened to. You can help him understand that it’s okay to take it slow sometimes and that losing won’t make him weak.

Encourage him to be his best self but also remind him that he has nothing to prove and that he’s enough as he is.

Um livro fechado

Os homens tendem a esconder os seus sentimentos, but no, it’s not in their nature. It’s the result of a traumatic upbringing that made them learn to invalidate themselves.

You will never hear them complain. They solve their issues internally without your help. They might even call you dramatic for expressing your feelings, but they secretly hate that they’re not as brave as you.

O que é que se pode fazer?

Bem, começa por te abrires com ele. Faz com que ele veja que vulnerabilidade emocional isn’t such a frightening thing. Then, encourage him to do the same.

You don’t have to do this directly. You can do it through your actions. Mas não o ridicularize, em circunstância alguma, se ele exprimir as suas emoções.

Em vez disso, faça-lhe perguntas e mostre-lhe que compreende. Assim, ambos o ajudarão e tornarão a vossa relação mais significativa.

Men don’t have to be ‘manly’

Are you the type of woman who judges a man when he’s emotional?

Do you tell him he’s weak?

If so, I hate to break it to you, but that’s not the wisest choice of words. It just fá-lo sentir-se inseguro, so don’t be surprised if you start fighting or if he distances himself.

All their lives, men hear how they have to ‘toughen up.’ They aren’t even allowed to have a bad day without someone telling them that’s not a very ‘manly thing’ to do.

No final, esse acaba por ser o seu único desejo, e a isso chama-se masculinidade tóxica.

Well, guess what? It is the right of each man and woman to embrace their feelings. Neither is supposed to be only ‘manly’ or only ‘feminine.’

Men are not from Mars, and women are not from Venus. Men don’t have to like video games, and women don’t have to be fragile. They are both allowed to mix it up.

After all, we’re human, aren’t we? Our gender doesn’t matter much. So, the next time you feel like you’re about to utter something so hurtful, stop and think it through.

Wanting to understand a man isn’t the same thing as carefully observing what made him who he is and gently remedying the harmful effects.

What’s in the box?

Well, it’s not the remains of Brad Pitt’s wife, but neither is your man.

Sei que queres que eu revele a verdade. Como é que se compreende realmente um homem? Mas, a única verdade é esta: Each man is different, and you can’t put them in a single box.

Alguns são machos alfa e outros são tímidos. Alguns aproximam-se de si apenas para brincar consigo, e outros querem compromisso.

They DO NOT possess the same wishes and needs as many have made you believe. If you can’t figure your man out, try talking to him. Or, simply analyze what’s there in front of you.

Don’t hold onto stereotypes because, trust me, they will not help you. You will only end up feeding your mind with falsehoods, which will make you unnecessarily miserable.

Em vez disso, confiar nas suas capacidades de pensamento crítico, intuição e empatia.

Remember – Embora existam certas semelhanças, tal como acontece com as mulheres, cada homem é um indivíduo. Trate-os como tal.

Ver também: Pode um homem dormir com uma mulher sem desenvolver sentimentos?

Como fazer com que um homem a compreenda?

Well, you can’t magically achieve that.

Vocês são ambos adultos e são perfeitamente capazes de resolver as coisas. Por isso, em vez de se queixar dele aos seus amigos e de procurar respostas na Internet, faça isto:

• Calmly explain to him why you’re upset.

• Remember that you’re seeking a solution, not more problems.

• Listen to his side of the story.

• Both of you clearly state your needs.

• Take accountability for your actions.

• Actively work to become better partners.

Se tiver um parceiro evitante, though, you’re going to have to approach the matter with a little more caution and empathy.

Como saber se um homem é para si?

We all have our doubts. It’s not strange to question the love we have for someone or the love someone has for us.

So, if you’re unsure whether the guy in front of you is the right one, here are some signs that will help you with that:

1. Não há necessidade de fingimento.

Eu sei que muitas vezes suprimes partes de ti para atraíres os homens. Mas, quando finalmente encontra uma boaNão há necessidade disso.

Não existem sinais contraditórios, and you are finally able to be who you are, and so is he. You celebrate each other’s differences and enjoy what you have in common.

As tuas piadas são sempre compreendidas, os teus sentimentos nunca são julgados e cada palavra que dizes é acarinhada como um evangelho.

Todos estes são sinais de que um homem ama-te verdadeiramente.

2. Excitação eterna.

I’m sure you’ve all felt it…the overwhelming enthusiasm that their presence brings. You can’t get the smile off of your face. It lights up each second you’re with him.

Sente-se que he’s attracted to you. A química é inigualável, e a contacto visual prolongado makes you feel like this is what you’ve been waiting for all your life. A sua linguagem corporal says it, too. Also, you can’t wait to choose a perfectly nome de contacto do namorado bonito para ele.

He’s not one to change after the honeymoon phase but rather makes the whole relationship a fase de lua de mel.

That’s how you know he’s the right man for you.

3. Uma mente que rejeita todos os outros.

Do you know that line from Lana Del Rey’s song: ‘‘Why wait for the best when I could have you?”

Well, if you’ve found a high-value guy, you know exactly what she’s talking about.

When that happens, you don’t care that o teu colega de trabalho gosta de ti nem que o teu amigo homem está secretamente apaixonado por ti. You don’t see any of them.

You feel like you’ve found what you’ve been looking for for so long. Why, then, would you look elsewhere?

4. A amizade incendiada.

If you’re in a long-term relationship, I’m sure you’ll agree with me that friendship is what truly makes it special. Yes, atração física is important, but that’s not what makes it last.

If you’re not able to have fun as friends and share intimate thoughts with each other, then what’s the point?

So, if you’ve found a true friend in a man, I assure you that you’ve also found the perfect partner.

5. Uma alma que reconhece o que procurou.

Sentimos quando um homem é o ideal para nós, por vezes mesmo depois do primeiro encontro. Há uma ligação inexplicável que nada nem ninguém consegue quebrar. Pela primeira vez na sua vida, sente-se segura e compreendida.

With other guys, there were always barriers you never dared to cross, but with him, those barriers don’t exist. You are drawn to each other to the point where you merge. If you feel this way, that’s your sign.

P.S. If you still haven’t found a guy who has made you feel the things described above, try reading ”To Date a Man, You Must Understand a Man: The Keys to Catch a Great Guy (Dating and Relationship Advice for Women).’’

Another great book to help you understand a man better is ”Power Texting Men,” and both are written by Gregg Michaelsen, a relationship expert.

Desta forma, aumentará as suas hipóteses de estabelecer uma relação séria com um homem.

Como é que se faz um homem perceber que cometeu um erro?

Bem, diz-lhe.

How can he realize that he made a mistake if you don’t let him know? You can’t be mad with someone over something they have no clue about.

Este é um dos maiores erros que as mulheres cometem. Elas esquecem-se de que uma boa comunicação é sinal de um relação saudável. Por isso, é você que o vai praticar. Fale sobre o assunto e veja onde está o problema.

If he refuses to accept the blame even after all your efforts, then I’m afraid that’s a major red flag. If he doesn’t respect you enough to take your feelings into consideration, he is just bad news.

Detesto dizer-te isto, mas a melhor atitude a tomar é afastares-te.

On the other hand, if he’s willing to put in the necessary work to remedy what he has done, he’s an homem emocionalmente maduro que deve sempre estimar.

Como é que se faz com que um homem sinta muito a nossa falta?

Está ansiosa por ter o seu ex de volta? Ou, tem uma paixoneta por um tipo que deixou subitamente de te enviar mensagens?

Se fosse eu a decidir, dir-lhe-ia que um homem que te rejeita isn’t worthy of your efforts.

But, since it’s not, I am here to show you that not all hope is lost. Here are some pieces of dating advice that will make him rush back to you immediately:

Seja a vida da festa

Por alguma razão estranha, os rapazes muitas vezes distanciar-se após a intimidade, so if you want him to miss you, you have to show him that you’re having a great time without him.

So, go out with your friends, travel to new cities, and post pictures to show him that you don’t really need him. Also, don’t text him and he will text you.

Ele vai procurar-vos por duas razões:

1. He can’t stand that you’ve forgotten all about him.

2. He’s attracted to your energetic spirit and wants to be a part of your life.

Seja como for, ganhaste.

RELACIONADO: 14 coisas inteligentes para fazer quando ele não responde às mensagens durante dias

Usar o seu velho charme

Por vezes, os homens afastam-se porque só preciso de espaço. It’s not necessarily over. But, we don’t have time for such analysis.

If you want to win him back, it’s essential that you acentuar tudo o que o fez apaixonar-se por si em primeiro lugar.

Foi a sua personalidade brincalhona? Ou foi a sua opinião?

Whatever it was, make sure that you bring back the old you to help you seduce him. Join forces and remind him of what he lost. He’ll come right back knocking at your door!

Or, if you’re too impatient, just diz-lhe que gostas dele. You’ve got nothing to lose.

Mostre-lhe que tem opções

Talvez he doesn’t want a relationship with you mas ainda pode ser motivado a mudar de ideias, e nada pode motivar mais um homem do que a presença de outro homem!

Por isso, sinta-se à vontade para ser um pouco sedutor e para jogar duro para conseguir, or if you dislike playing games, then simply mention how many suitors you have when he’s around.

You will notice that he’s paying attention because he just can’t stand the competition! Outro tipo ter-te é ainda pior do que não te ter de todo. Um pouco estranho, mas é o que é.

The bottom line is that if you make him jealous, you’ve done half the job of winning him back!

Tip: While it’s valid to act on your feelings, you also need to understand the importance of mutual effort. If he doesn’t try at all, then maybe it’s time to finally let go.

Saber quando se deve ir embora

Um homem usará muitos estratégias sorrateiras e manipuladoras para vos seduzir. Aprenda a reconhecê-los em vez de ceder ao seu poder porque he’s just playing you.

Seja honesto consigo próprio. Um homem que quer estar contigo WILL be with you. It’s that simple. Move on and find someone who will truly appreciate you instead of focusing on a guy who won’t even lift a finger.

Como faço para que ele perceba o meu valor?

Bem, comece por se aperceber disso.

If he disrespects you often, don’t make excuses for him. Demand the respect you give him. Granted, if he were a quality man who really cared about you, you wouldn’t have to tell him any of this. But alright, we are only human after all.

Estabelecer limites

Let him know what is okay to do and what is not. Let him do the same. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you are each other’s slaves. That’s not what boundaries are.

Os limites existem apenas para que se possa manter uma relação mais saudável. Antes de serem parceiros, são indivíduos com necessidades diferentes.

This is why it’s crucial to state them instead of just hoping that your partner will fulfill them without even knowing what they are.

Now, I know I’m no dating coach, but here’s an honest piece of advice: Nunca terás de provar o teu valor a uma mulher ou um homem que te ama verdadeiramente. Eles vão estimá-lo sem que você precise de lhes dizer.

Conclusão

In order to understand a man, you need to look at him with unbiased eyes. Don’t put him in a box with the rest of them but rather see him for the individual he is.

If you have a problem, say what it is clearly. It won’t disappear until you face it together. But, remember – não se trata de vocês contra os outros, mas de vocês contra o problema.

No entanto, se notar que um homem não tem interesse em contribuir para a relação, ama-te a ti próprio o suficiente para se ir embora.

Every woman needs and deserves a great love story, so don’t settle for less.