We are all possessive from time to time when it comes to people we love. And no matter what anyone tells you, jealousy is a part of every relationship. But, there is a huge difference between healthy and unhealthy jealousy. A little bit of jealousy never hurt anyone. As the matter of fact, it is usually quite flattering for the other person and it can spice things up. But, there is a thin line between healthy and possessive jealousy and it can be easily crossed. Sometimes, you think that you have a perfect boyfriend who is madly in love with you and who fears losing you. You feel special because he acts like he can’t live without you and you find it cute. You know you are the centre of this guy’s world and you kind of enjoy it. But, with time, you begin to wonder if this man is actually overreacting. Is it possible that your Mr. Perfect is actually an insecure man? Is his jealousy unhealthy? Here are 5 red flag behaviours you should pay attention to.
1. He has to know about every move you make
One of the signs that your partner is unhealthily jealous is the fact that he wants to know where you are at and who are you with at every single moment. This guy gets mad if you don’t text him the second you wake up and he expects you to keep him updated about every single move you make during the day. It is great if a guy you are seeing is interested in how your day has been, but it is something else if you can’t take a proper breath without him having to know about it.
2. He is stalking you
Lately, your boyfriend somehow shows up whenever you go and he claims it is a coincidence. But, this guy knows your habits, knows where he can find you and it is probable that he’s been stalking you. He doesn’t believe you and wants to make sure you are not doing anything he doesn’t want you to do. Whenever you go out without him, he shows up out of the blue, telling you he just wanted to surprise you or that he is checking up on you. But, the reality is different. This man is obviously jealous and dangerously possessive and he has some serious trust issues.
3. He doesn’t allow you to have secrets
Even when you are in a relationship with someone, that doesn’t mean that you’ve ceased to exist as a person. You are still an individual, with and without him in your life. But, it seems that your boyfriend doesn’t understand this and that he doesn’t want to accept it. It is normal for you to share your thoughts with him, but it is also normal if you want to keep some things for yourself. But, this guy wants to know every little detail about your life and he is extremely inquisitive. He wants you to talk to him about all the trivialities that happened to you or someone you both know. It’s like he wants to get inside your mind. If he doesn’t have access to every detail regarding you, he gets frustrated and makes a big deal out of it.
4. He tries to control your every move
If your boyfriend’s jealousy is unhealthy, he will try to interfere in every single aspect of your life. At first, you’ll think he is just being helpful and that it is great you have such a supportive boyfriend you can always count on. But, with time, you’ll realize that he is only doing this so he can have an insight into everything that is going on regarding you. This man is obviously ready to go an extra mile just so he could control every move you make. He wants to be a part of every decision you take and he can’t accept if the two of you disagree. Everything in your life has to be his way and if it is not, he turns it into a huge fight.
5. He wants you all for himself
This guy doesn’t have any respect for your personal boundaries in the relationship or personal space. If it was up to him, the two of you would spend every minute of every day together. He doesn’t think you should have friends or that you should hang out with your co-workers. Even if you think about going somewhere without him, he tags along without even being invited. When you tell him that his behaviour is making you uncomfortable, he immediately accuses you of feeling that he is only a burden to you and makes it as if you are obviously hiding something.