When you think about the reasons why most serious and good relationships fall apart, the first things that come to your mind are the big ones, such as cheating or some kind of abuse. But think again! How many happy couples do you know who have broken things off without any apparent reason? The real truth is that many relationships actually fall apart because of the little things that everyone fails to notice, including the partners in the relationship. Here are 7 of the most common little things that can destroy your relationship unless you act on them immediately.

1. Not taking responsibility

One of the first things that can ruin any relationship is not taking responsibility for your actions and this goes for both you and your partner. If you want to have a healthy and successful relationship, you need to stop putting all the blame for everything wrong in it on the other person. Instead, it’s time to accept that most of the things in the relationship, including the bad ones, are actually both partners’ responsibility.

2. Sweeping away unresolved arguments

Every couple, including the happiest ones, will have an argument once in a while. And there is nothing wrong with resolving different issues between partners. Actually, it is what you should be doing. But what is important is to have healthy and productive arguments, which means that all issues need to be resolved and taken care of in time. If you decide to sweep unresolved arguments under the carpet, trust me—those things will come and get you sooner or later and can seriously harm your relationship. And the last thing you need is to fight over something that happened a year ago, for example.

3. Not expressing your real opinion

Another thing that you may think is not that serious but could actually bring your relationship to an end is not speaking your real opinion. I know there are times when you want to spare your partner and when you don’t want to hurt his feelings but you always need to make sure you have the opportunity to express your opinions, attitudes and feelings loud and clear. Because if you don’t, those things will pile up inside of you and they will bring mutual dissatisfaction.

4. Taking your relationship for granted

After you’ve been with one person for years, it is not uncommon for you to start considering this person as a part of your life and that you start seeing them as someone who could never leave you, no matter what. But just because it is common, it doesn’t make it right. Many people, especially married couples and those in long-term relationships, have a tendency to take their relationship and their partner for granted after a while, without realizing how much harm they are actually causing. So instead of doing this, try and keep the passion and love alive at all times.

5. Flirting

Many people consider cheating only to be something physical. But trust me—they are all wrong. Cheating is much more and sometimes emotional affairs are even more painful than physical ones. Therefore, flirting is also a form of cheating and this is something both you and your partner should avoid doing if you are in a serious relationship, especially in front of your partner. Flirting is only a sign of disrespect and a sign that you don’t think much of your relationship and is definitely something that can affect it negatively.

6. Not talking for real

After a while, many couples stop talking to each other. And when I say this, I’m talking about real talking here. Yes, you will talk about everyday stuff and you will talk to each other about how your day has been or you’ll make some small talk. But the moment you stop sharing your dreams, hopes, ambitions and fears with your partner, you have a problem and it can be one of the reasons why your relationship ends. Instead of doing this, make some time in your busy schedule for just the two of you, when you’ll have a chance to have deep, meaningful conversations.

7. Being too relaxed

I know we all aspire to find a partner whom we can be our complete self in front of. And it is beautiful when you find someone with whom you don’t have to pretend you are someone you are not. But that doesn’t mean you are allowed to stop taking care of yourself completely and that you can be way too relaxed in front of him. No matter how long you are with someone and how close you are to your partner, keep some things like clipping your toenails or shaving your legs private. This way, you’ll always keep a little bit of mystery and that is what every relationship needs.