There is a certain kind of pain that is worse than all the others. It’s the kind of pain that never leaves you and rips your heart from your chest.
It’s not about breaking up. It’s not about getting ghosted and getting cheated on. It’s not something that can be fixed.
It’s something that time can soothe a little but never heal. It’s the excruciating pain you feel when you know you will never see your loved one again.
She feels like her whole universe has been ripped out of her arms, and there is nothing she can do.
It wasn’t supposed to go this way. It’s not fair. It doesn’t make any sense. Her loved one should have stayed and lead a happy and healthy life.
She needed more time. She needed more conversations.
She needed more laughs, more moments, more memories. She needs them still, but she knows that’s impossible.
She is strong, not because she wants to be but because she has to be. She’s accepted the fact that heaven was missing an angel and that sometimes awful, heartbreaking things happen, and there’s nothing we can say or do to change that.
She accepted it in a way, but she will never fully understand it.
That day, that moment when she heard the news about what happened, changed her life forever. It changed her. It made her question everything—even God and His plans.
She could barely keep it together. Her strength hit it’s the lowest point, and she thought she would run out of it completely.
But she didn’t. Against all odds, she pulled herself back up. And it wasn’t because she was OK with everything that happened. It was because she had no other option but to keep on going.
Death is something that turned her world upside down. It made her wish it was her in her loved one’s place. But she was still very much alive, and she had to find sense in all the pain and confusion.
She’s cried her heart out, but the tears are still there. They are going to be there every time something happens, and she wishes to tell her loved one, but she can’t.
They are going to be there every time she passes the place they used to hang out at. They are going to be there every time she wakes up from a dream in which her loved one was still by her side.
They are going to be there on all the holidays and all the special occasions. They are going to come uninvited and out of the blue.
The only comfort she has is that her loved one is still watching over her from heaven. She knows that person wouldn’t want her to spend her whole life in tears. That is the reason she is laughing.
She is happy that she had this person in her life even though it wasn’t as nearly as she wanted to. It was a blessing on its own.
She is strong because she hasn’t allowed death to turn her into someone bitter. She still has a lot of love in that soft heart of hers.
She is giving that love to those people important to her. She is looking at life with whole different set of eyes.
She knows that it’s short. That’s why she treasures every little moment she has with her friends and family.
She is a shoulder to cry on, an ear that listens and a rock to lean on when one of her friends is dealing with the death of a loved one.
She knows how unimaginably hard it is, and she knows that only those who have been through something like that can understand.
She is strong because she suffered a great loss, she lost someone she loved deeply, and she is still standing. And if she managed to do that, she can do anything.