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66 Thought Provoking Questions That Are Better Than Small Talk

66 Thought Provoking Questions That Are Better Than Small Talk

If you’re looking for the best thought provoking questions that will challenge your perspective and make you (and others) think hard, then you’re in just the right place!

Contrary to small talk, thought provoking questions have the power to boost our creativity, inspire us to question our beliefs and think outside the box.

These are the questions that help you form deep and meaningful connections with other people.

If you (like myself) enjoy having deep conversations for hours, you’ll love the wide array of topics that these questions offer!

If you ask me, small talk is overrated. Of course, sometimes you don’t have a choice but to engage in casual chit-chat, which is okay.

However, thought provoking questions should be your top priority and here’s why: You can spend eternity with that one person but if you fail to ask them the right questions that will tell you a lot about their personality and their mindset, you will never really get to know them.

This is pure fact. Regardless of whether you’re looking for conversation starters for texting or deep relationship questions that will help you spark great conversation, you’ll find it all here (and more)!

You will find a variety of interesting questions that will get your brain working and help you spark a deep conversation between you and your partner, a family member or a close friend. So, let’s get started!

Best Thought Provoking Questions To Make You Think

What is the one thing that you do today but you couldn’t do two years ago?

As time passes, we either improve or stagnate. Two years ago, I wasn’t able to lift as much at the gym as I can today. Also, now I’m able to make some meals from scratch (and they also taste better than two years ago).

There are probably many other things that have changed since then but I can’t list them all. However, one of the most important things I do today is make the most of every day.

What is the easiest way to catch your attention?

I don’t know about you but the easiest way for someone to catch my attention is to show me food. Just kidding (or maybe not)!

Some people don’t react to visual stimuli and the only way to grab their attention is by changing your tone of voice. But I’m still convinced that food is a sure-fire way to catch anyone’s attention.

According to you, what are the three main disadvantages of the modern world we live in?

For me, it’s a lack of a real connection (instead of a virtual one), a hectic lifestyle and fake values imposed by the media and self-proclaimed influencers.

Actually, when I think more carefully about it, there are more disadvantages than advantages to the modern world we live in. Do you agree with me? You can also ask others whether they agree with you or not.

Do you see crying as a sign of strength or weakness?

For me, crying is definitely not a sign of weakness because it takes courage to be able to cry alone or in front of other people. Not everyone feels comfortable tapping into the sensitive and emotional side of themselves.

Perhaps for you, it is neither of the two but it should be put into a special category that perfectly defines the art of crying.

Are you grateful for everything you have?

Do you suffer from the grass is greener syndrome or are you focused on the things in front of you? Are you grateful for everything you already have or are you only focused on the things you don’t have?

Even though the media is constantly bombarding us with new things (usually more expensive things), do you still find time to express gratitude for the little things in your life and those that are mostly taken for granted?

If you could travel back in time, what would you change?

If I could travel back in time, I would probably stay there forever because of all the things that I would like to change.

From failed relationships to not-so-satisfying life choices, I’m convinced that everything would be different if I had a chance to go back in time and fix everything.

But instead of doing that (not that I could even if I wanted to), I just remind myself that everything happens for a reason. How do you cope with the realization that you can’t change what happened in the past?

See also: 750+ Great Truth Or Dare Questions (The Ultimate List)

Do you think it’s possible to lie without uttering a single word?

Do you think that our words are the main culprit and destroyer of good relationships and other things in life? Hmm… Can we lie with our body language, actions or other things that don’t involve the usage of words?

Here’s another sub-question: Do you think it’s possible to lie to yourself?

What are the activities you enjoy the most?

Singing, drawing, writing, cuddling with my pet. Do you enjoy the same things? If you ask me, this is one of the best first date questions because it says a lot about the person you’re dating at the time.

And best of all is that you could join them, in case they are doing something really interesting or if your activities match. If they enjoy going for a walk, there you go!

When was the last time you had a brilliant idea that you couldn’t stop thinking about?

The last time I thought I had a brilliant idea was not so long ago. I was convinced that it was the discovery of the century only to realize that the thing already existed. Well, of course, it exists!

How naive of me to think that I was capable of coming up with something totally new when we live in a world where we have everything we need at our disposal.

I don’t remember what it was really about but all I know is that it was trivial and brilliant at the same time.

Do you think conflict is a bad thing?

I personally think that conflict is a great thing because it helps us evolve, share our perspectives and celebrate our differences. I also think that constant conflict is a bad thing (especially in relationships).

Do you see conflict as something that is totally negative and destructive or do you see it in a different light like me? Don’t worry, I won’t get mad in case you don’t agree with me.

What are two life lessons you learned the hard way?

Usually, I need more time to come up with a satisfying answer to such questions but for this one, I didn’t have to think too hard. Two life lessons I learned the hard way are the following:

1. Don’t trust anyone.

2. Time heals everything.

It’s funny how these two life lessons actually complement one another. Don’t trust anyone but in case you do start trusting someone and they hurt you, just remember that time heals everything.

Sounds like the cardinal rule of life, right?

Does social media have a positive or negative impact on you?

Negative. Lord knows how many times I have compared myself to some other prettier girl thinking that there’s something wrong with me and I’ll never manage to meet the standards of modern media.

Also, I realized that I tend to waste a lot of my time scrolling through my social media feed and then I say to myself: Woman, you can’t seem to stop scrolling, right?

After some arguing with myself, I finally stop scrolling and shift to other more important tasks that I’m supposed to do that day. I wonder whether you’ve had similar experiences or is it just me?

Funny Thought Provoking Questions

Imagine that your pet could talk. What do you think it would say to you?

Given that my pet is a cat, I imagine that he would say something like this to me: “Hooman, I won’t tolerate you always sleeping in your bed anymore. Whatever you see in this house belongs to me (especially the fluffy stuff). Now, give me food, servant!”

If you also have a cat, I’m sure you agree with me on this one. I often imagine my pet talking to me and according to its facial expression, I know exactly what he’s thinking (or at least I think I know).

Well, I guess I’ll never know.

If you were arrested, what would your family and friends think you had done?

Had a car crash? Just kidding, as that would go against my belief about driving gender stereotypes.

In case I was arrested, I have no idea what my friends and family would think I’d done, so I’ll make sure to ask them. If you’re also not sure, do the same.

What is something trending now but will probably be considered stupid a few years from now?

I bet there are lots of things that are popular now but will probably be considered stupid and embarrassing five or ten years from now. One such thing is memes.

If you’re a meme lover, you know that there is a wide array of them circulating through the Internet and everyone seems to be praising them at the moment.

A few years from now, we will probably be ashamed of even laughing at certain memes because the standards for what’s funny will have evolved significantly.

See also: How Well Do You Know Me? 300+ Questions For Couples And Friends

What is the funniest/most embarrassing clothing item you’ve ever worn?

Okay, this is probably one of the most embarrassing questions out there.

I’m trying really hard to remember all my embarrassing moments regarding clothing but I can’t think of any at the moment.

However, I’m sure you have a few examples to share with your friends and family (or maybe your partner) who will enjoy laughing out loud at your bold choices of clothing items!

When you’re feeling ill, do you have a tendency to go online and diagnose your symptoms?

I’m pretty sure that we’ve all been there and not just once.

Every time I would Google my symptoms, I would end up having some serious illness like cancer and this would make me feel even worse than before. (I seriously need to stop doing that.)

What is the worst name you could give your son or daughter?

Here’s another fun question. Are there any awkward names that come to your mind at the moment? If yes, make sure to share them with your loved ones and make them laugh out loud!

Would you rather choose to be in an asylum or prison?

Hmmm… this is a tough one. Still, I think I would rather be in an asylum because I would probably lose my sanity in prison, so there’s no difference between the two. I think prison is the new asylum.

If you had an opportunity to make one thing illegal, what would it be?

Snoring. There’s nothing in the world that could annoy me more than hearing someone snore at full speed in the middle of the night.

I’m aware of the fact that there are far more important things in the world to deal with but for me, this one is a top priority. I’m sure all the snoring haters will agree with me on this one.

Do you think you can cry underwater?


That’s a really good question. Are we even able to cry underwater? If yes, how would we know for sure that we were crying? I guess the only way to find out the answer to this question is to try crying underwater.

Have you ever sent a text message to the wrong recipient?

Speaking of the most embarrassing situations in someone’s lifetime, this happened to me multiple times but fortunately, the content of my text messages wasn’t as sensitive as it could have been.

I’m sure you’re dying to hear all of your friends’ embarrassing answers to this one question, so make sure to memorize them all!

See also: Tinder Questions: 290+ Best Questions To Ask Your Tinder Match

Thought Provoking Questions For Couples

What are the three main ingredients that make a perfect relationship?

This question is one of the best conversation starters for couples. If you ask me, the three main ingredients of a perfect relationship are trust, respect and compromise.

Without these three things, I think it would be impossible to establish a healthy and happy relationship. What do you think about this?

Do you feel uncomfortable talking to me about anything?

No matter how long you’ve been in a relationship with someone, there are always some things your partner might feel uncomfortable sharing with you.

Some of us feel uncomfortable sharing our fears with others because we’re afraid of appearing weak in their eyes. Perhaps your partner feels the same. The easiest way to find out is by asking them.

Do you feel respected and appreciated by me?

Asking your loved one if they feel respected and appreciated by you is one of the best ways to find out if you do this in the right ways. If they do feel respected and appreciated by you, then you’re doing it right

What are the top three things you like about me?

This is a great question for pillow talk with your partner. It’s both romantic and cute and it will help you strengthen your bond. Perhaps they’ll surprise you with a unique and creative answer!

What is your opinion on cheating?

My opinion on cheating is the following: Cheating is specifically reserved for cowards. No matter the circumstances, cheating simply cannot be justified.

It’s good to know your partner’s opinion on this so that you can be sure that they don’t belong to the (potential) crew of cheaters.

What has been the most challenging period of your life?

For me, the most challenging period was during my teenage years. If you’re interested in all the details regarding your partner’s most challenging period, ask them to explain why it was the most challenging.

Do you think emotional affairs and texting are more harmful than physical affairs?

I think emotional affairs and texting are equally harmful but perhaps more hurtful than physical affairs.

Emotional affairs require lots of someone’s attention and time which results in neglecting your current partner’s needs and destroying your relationship for good.

Do you feel like something is missing in our relationship?

This is one of the best love questions for couples. Knowing what’s missing in your relationship is the only way to improve it.

By asking this, you’re letting your partner know that their opinion matters and you’re interested in how they feel about your relationship.

What is the one thing you like most about our relationship?

This is one of those romantically cute questions to ask your boyfriend or girlfriend. Here are some answers that you could expect from your partner: I like the fact that I can be who I am with you. I like that we can act all crazy and childish at one moment and a few minutes later, talk about serious topics. I love the way you love me.

I’ll stop right here because I got chills from all these romantic vibes.

Philosophical Questions That Will Change Your Perspective

What is the meaning of life?

This is a totally random question but also one of the most powerful ones as it will lead to a long and interesting conversation. It’s one of those deep questions to ask your date if you really want to get to know them.

For me, the meaning of life is connected with our purpose. Once you find your life purpose, you’ll find the meaning of life as well.

Do you think free will is real or just an illusion?

I think free will is real to a certain extent. In some situations, it is an illusion. However, it all depends on your own perspective of all this.

What makes your life worth living?

For me, it’s the little things. Cuddling with my pet, hanging out with my friends and family, spending time in nature, watching an inspiring movie and so on.

Besides that, the desire to achieve all my goals and become the best version of myself are things that make my life worth living.

According to you, what is the most important event in the history of the human race?

Wondering how to keep a conversation going with a guy or girl? Then just ask them this question. I’m sure you’ll get some interesting answers.

I think the most important event in the history of the human race is the discovery of fire. Once we started cooking, we evolved significantly and improved our bodies and minds.

Fire is responsible for many other changes in the world as well.

What do you think is keeping you from experiencing complete happiness?

Myself. I think we’re capable of achieving anything we want to, ONLY if we want to. Also, if you don’t think that you’re happy, you will not be happy but if you think that you are, then you’ll experience complete happiness.

It’s all about your mindset. The only thing that’s keeping us from experiencing complete happiness is ourself but that’s just my thinking.

What is the most life-changing decision you’ve ever made?

This is an interesting and unique conversation topic for family members, friends and partners. The most life-changing decision I’ve ever made was to continue studying in another city.

This helped me become totally independent, broaden my horizons and become the person I am today.

Is suffering an inevitable part of our personal development and growth?

I think it is. Without pain, we wouldn’t be able to appreciate the good things in life. Without suffering, we wouldn’t be able to progress.

Our bad relationships, hardships and all those negative events happened to us for a reason and that reason is to make us stronger, bolder and wiser.

You know what they say: fall down seven times, get up eight. Falling is what makes us appreciate stability.

What is your vision of utopia (in this instance, a perfect society)?

A perfect society would be one without social media, smartphones, evil people, greediness and so on.

Empathy would be the main trait of people in society and they would be focused on sharing agape love instead of destroying the world with their ulterior motives and greedy nature.

Do we judge and gossip about other people for the sake of feeling better about ourself?

I think this could be true. The only reason why we sometimes focus on other people’s lives is that we’re unsatisfied with our own. By judging or gossiping, we’re subconsciously making ourself feel better.

We convince ourself that they are wrong and we’re right, when in reality no one is wrong or right. We’re all a part of something bigger than we’re able to comprehend and we should start acting that way.

Do you think you’re living your life to the fullest?

Sadly, I don’t think I’m living my life to the fullest and I don’t think anyone is. We live in a world where our wishes and dreams are sabotaged by obligations and things we do only for the sake of surviving and not living.

But who knows, maybe one day everything will change and we will all start living our lives to the fullest and reaching our full potential.

See also: 25 Best Flirty Questions To Ask A Girl You Want To Impress

Deep Thought Provoking Questions

If you could receive a million dollars under the condition that one stranger becomes poor, would you accept it?

Definitely not. If I accepted it, I would be happy for a short period but in the long run, I would probably be deeply unhappy knowing that I had everything and the other person (the stranger) now had nothing.

However, I think there’s a perfect solution to this problem. If I could share some money with that one stranger, I would accept it but I don’t think things work that way.

What are the things that you do for the sake of becoming your best self?

I give my best to be physically active as much as I can, I try to eat healthy food, I empathize with others and so on.

I daresay that I’m mostly focused on making the world a better place and sharing my positive energy with others.

I think that it’s impossible to become your best self if you’re only focused on yourself. Taking care of others plays an important role in our development.

What are the three most important things on your bucket list?

Travel around the world, make the world a better place and become a singer.

I think that by only singing, I could make the world a better place and I could hopefully travel around the world if I earned enough money doing that.

Do you have similar items on your bucket list or are your items more adventurous and challenging? Don’t forget to ask your friends about it as well. Let’s support each other’s dreams and wishes!

What is your most improved character trait?

If you’re a fan of the 21 Questions Game, you should definitely add this question to your list. I think that my most improved character trait is self-control.

For example, when I see food that screams ‘sugar overload’, I don’t have a problem refraining from devouring it. Or when I’m really sleepy and it’s raining outside, I still somehow motivate myself to hit the gym no matter what.

Well, I wish I could implement self-control in my love life as well but I guess that you can’t always have your cake and eat it too.

Have you ever been a victim of stereotyping?

Oh, yes. Multiple times. My female friends and I have been victims of driving gender stereotypes which claim that men are better drivers. Well, I don’t think so. (Don’t get offended if you’re a guy reading this.)

In your defense, here’s another stereotype that I don’t agree with. It says that men are messy and unclean. I’ve met men who are a little bit unorganized but I’ve also met those who are extremely tidy.

What are your experiences regarding stereotyping?

Where do you tend to spend most of your time during the day?

Working, of course but when not working, I tend to spend as much time as possible in nature.
I’m a strong believer that social media and the virtual world make it hard for us to connect with our true self.

I also prefer spending time doing something creative, from drawing to different DIY projects.

What would be the best remedy for healing the entire world?

I think the world abounds in negative energy so the best way to heal it would be by practicing positive thinking. We often forget that our thoughts are the most powerful force in the universe.

Just by changing our mindset, we can change the way we interact with others, the way we treat Mother Nature and other things.

I’ve realized that positive thinking has brought me a lot of great things in life. I guess we just need to be patient.

What job would you never accept (regardless of the salary)?

I would never accept a security job, no matter how much it paid. I just can’t imagine spending the majority of my time not doing anything creative but that’s just me. You know what they say: never say never.

If you were able to teach something, what would it be?

I would teach people to respect and embrace differences. I think the majority of our daily conflicts and problems arise from the fact that we don’t respect each other enough.

We’re only focused on what we want at the time, not thinking about how others are feeling.

I think the world would be a much better place if we learned to listen to each other and respect other people’s opinions no matter what.

Do you listen to your gut?

They say that listening to our gut is basically listening to our soul telling us to do something or not.

I often listen to my gut but sometimes I tend to neglect that little voice inside me because I’m scared that it will play tricks on me.

Do you have the same feeling about it or do you listen to your gut without much overthinking?

When you meet someone for the first time, what is the first thing you notice about them?

The first thing I notice about someone is their aura. Since I’m overly sensitive to other people’s energy, they can make me feel great or depressed. Perhaps you feel the same way about this?

What is your greatest strength?

If you’re looking for topics to talk about with a guy, you cannot go wrong with this one!

Guys love to boast around the girls they like and if you ask them directly about their greatest strength, they will be more than happy to give you a satisfying answer to that one question.

Do you think your high school friends influenced your behavior?

I think every single one around us influences our behavior to a certain extent. So, yes, our colleagues, high school friends, and others all play an important role in our personal development.

What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received?

“You are responsible for your own happiness.” I used to think that finding The One is the only way to reach true happiness. But the thing is, happiness can only be found within ourself.

If we’re not able to love ourself, we will not be able to love others either. At the end of the day, you only have yourself.

What is your favorite childhood memory?

My favorite childhood memory is the moment when my little brother took his first steps.

I was so excited and happy about it because I knew that from that moment, I would be able to play with him properly, show him the world and hide from our parents when we were doing something that we shouldn’t.

Thought Provoking Questions For Kids

What activity makes you feel happiest?

Kids love to talk about their favorite activities because they feel like watching cartoons is their job. Well, indeed, it is.

Some kids love to make art with crayons, while others like to play outside with their friends. If you have a child or a little brother or sister, make sure to ask them about their favorite activity.

What three words best describe you?

Children have an inexhaustible source of imagination. If you ask them to describe themselves in three words, they will make sure to reward you with the most creative answers that will surely make you laugh.

Who is your greatest role model?

Usually, their parents are a child’s greatest role models but sometimes even their favorite cartoon characters have an important role in their little lives.

What are the things you’re most grateful for?

Toys, toys, toys. Okay, not every child will give you this answer but the majority will. This question is probably most suitable for older children because they are more familiar with a sense of gratitude.

How do you imagine your life in the future?

This one is always fun to ask. Sometimes, children know what they want to do for the rest of their lives and they become determined to achieve that in the future.

This will help them focus on the things they want to do and it will help them follow their passions.

If you had a chance to change the world, how would you do it?

As already said, a child’s imagination doesn’t have limits, so their ideas regarding changing the world might surprise you.

Who is your favorite cartoon character and why?

Children love talking about their favorite cartoon characters and other things that mean so much to them.

If you ask them this one question, their eyes will sparkle and they won’t be able to stop talking about that one cartoon character they like so much.

If you could do anything you wanted right now, what would you do?

If I could do anything I wanted right now, I would probably go to the beach, sunbathe and then fall asleep. What would you do?

What are the things you like to daydream about?

I like to daydream about living in a world with no crime, lots of ice cream, positive vibes and empathy.

If you’re a kid reading this, you probably like to daydream about lots of ice cream as well and I secretly wish that was the only thing I was dreaming about at the moment.

What makes you feel appreciated and loved?

Children experience the world differently and they don’t have the same standards for love and appreciation.

By asking your child this question, you’ll know how to treat them and make the best of your parent-child relationship.

Wrapping It Up

I hope you enjoyed reading the above thought provoking questions and answers and that you found some interesting questions to ask your loved ones.

And remember, there are no right or wrong answers!
Every single one of us will have a different opinion on certain topics and that’s the real beauty of it.

This is a perfect opportunity to work on embracing differences, respecting each other’s opinions and to have FUN!

P.S. You can also spice things up with conversation games.