Wherever you look, it appears that everything in this world reveals around love. Filmmakers make movies and poets write poems about this intense emotion, it causes wars and people die for it. So, why is love important?
Does love really matter or is it just a modern fabrication? Is it possible to be happy without loving and being loved? Why do all human beings have the desire to connect with another human being?
If you want to know why is love important, here are some eye-opening reasons and three crucial facts about this emotion.
Primal human instinct
Many people will claim that love is a social construct. Even though there are many faces of love, this especially goes for romantic love.
Come on, how many times have you heard someone saying that real love has never existed? That it is nothing more than a Hollywood deception that puts unrealistic expectations in front of everyone?
Skeptics will even say that love actually makes people more miserable than happy. If this is true, then I have a question for you: Why do young kids fall in love?
To be precise, they don’t actually fall in love for real because you can’t call this sensation true romantic love.
However, I’m pretty sure you will have heard a kid coming home from daycare, telling you that they have a crush.
They haven’t watched Hollywood movies, have they? They haven’t been brainwashed into believing in love.
So, what’s actually going on here? Well, the truth is that love is a primal human instinct.
To be exact, romantic love and the process of falling in love are inborn. This is a claim made by many scientists and researchers.
It has been proven that love is and has been present in most cultures worldwide. In fact, it is crucial for the functioning of society.
This includes societies which have never had anything to do with Hollywood or western civilization.
Most, if not all, people around the world have had the urge to have an intimate connection with another human being.
Some have a hard time accepting this need while some are perfectly aware of it. Either way, this instinct is present in all of us and there is no use in running away from it.
If you can’t seem to find an answer to the question of why is love important, just think about all the art in the world. I’m referring to art that people have been producing since the beginning of time.
I’m talking about music, fine arts, sculptures, movies, theater…
Let’s think about it; what has been the number one inspiration for most artists? That’s right: love.
So, you still don’t believe in the importance of love? Love is the most common creative inspiration for all artists out there. Not only that, it’s also the strongest.
Some researchers have come to the conclusion that the sensation of being in love with another person gives your mind an incredible level of clarity. It relieves you of pressure and allows you to be more focused.
Besides, when you’re in love, all of your senses are enhanced. All of a sudden, you see the beauty in seemingly ordinary things and you discover all these creative ways to express love to another person.
More importantly, you get the power to express yourself the way you never have before.
It doesn’t matter whether you have never been good with words or talented at painting, all of this changes the moment you fall in love.
If you don’t believe me, believe in science. Namely that romantic love increases the levels of dopamine in your brain.
Dopamine is a hormone, also called a chemical messenger, connected to your creative side.
You don’t have to be physically next to your significant other to feel this way. It’ll be enough for you to think about them, to imagine you two together or to have them appear in your dreams.
When you were younger, I bet you thought that you had to be perfect in order for someone to fall in love with you.
You probably had a crush and wanted to do everything in your power to become more likable to them. Well, the fact is that this has nothing to do with love. In fact, true love is in no way connected with change.
Don’t misunderstand me; it will definitely make you better with time. However, you’re the one who’ll have the urge to become the best possible version of yourself.
If they’re the one for you, your partner will never try changing you. Not only that, they’ll never make you think that you’re not good enough the way you are.
Instead, love is important because it gives you different types of freedom.
First and foremost, it provides you with emotional freedom and acceptance. It gives you the liberty to be who you really are, together with all of your flaws and imperfections.
Also, many connect love with jealousy and possessivity. Well, let me tell you one thing: love gives you physical freedom as well.
It will never make you feel like you’re being caged. It will never make you feel trapped or imprisoned.
You see, the thing is that you’re able to do whatever you want. Nobody is forcing you to stay next to this one person.
However, despite this limitless freedom you’re experiencing, you’re the one who chooses not to go anywhere.
Despite popular opinion, true love is based on freedom, not on obligation or a sense of duty.
No matter the relationship you’re in, you should always put yourself first. This goes for romances and friendships as well as relationships with family members and co-workers.
Nevertheless, when you fall in love, you automatically cease to be selfish. In fact, this is one of the most important lessons that love teaches you: how to be selfless.
All of a sudden, it’s not just you in this world. Despite all of your independence, now, you’re a part of a team.
You can be the most self-sufficient person in the world but when you express love to someone and when someone loves you back, you’re not walking through life alone anymore.
Just like that, you start taking the other person’s wishes, desires and needs into consideration. You want to make them feel good and their happiness becomes as crucial as yours.
I’m not saying that you were an egomaniac before you fell in love. However, when you fall in love, your selflessness reaches new levels, the ones you never knew existed.
From now on, you learn to take care of another human being, with the same devotion you take care of yourself. Sometimes, you put their well-being in front of your own.
You’re stubborn. Everything has to go your way or no way at all. Sound familiar? Well, if you’re wondering why is love important, one of the answers is that it changes this about everyone.
Another crucial life lesson that falling in love teaches you is the importance of compromise. Once this divine sensation takes over you, you learn how to meet others halfway.
Yes, it all starts with your partner. Without them forcing you to do anything, you learn to adapt to their needs and lifestyle.
Now that you’re a part of a union, you understand that your desires are not the only things that count. You learn to take a step toward the other person.
You understand that every decision you make affects your partner as well. Therefore, there always has to exist a mutual concession before making a choice.
After all, you two are equals. Your opinions and needs are in no way more important than the other person’s.
Before you fell in love, you couldn’t imagine yourself giving something up in order to reach a common goal or place with your loved one. Well, now, this is a part of the past.
When you love another person, you do your best to take a walk in their shoes. You start looking at things from someone else’s perspective, even if that means that your point of view is now completely different.
Sometimes, you and your partner have completely different attitudes toward a significant life matter.
In this scenario, it’s impossible to have your way or for them to have their way because the other person would be left feeling unsatisfied and, consequently, unhappy.
So, you reach a compromise because it’s the only right thing to do. Even though your ability to meet your partner halfway at first impacts only your romance, with time, it changes you as a person.
It empowers all of your other relationships.
Without you being aware of it, you learn how to be a part of a team. You become more adaptable and flexible.
A great thing about a happy love life is that it gives you incredible courage, courage you didn’t even know you possessed. After all, remember all the wars that have been fought for love.
When you’re in love, you feel like there is nothing you can’t do. You’re certain of your capabilities to the point where there doesn’t exist an earthly force that could prevent you from reaching your goals.
You’re literally ready to stand in front of an army of people for the sake of the person you love and to defend your romance.
You’re ready to do whatever it takes to protect your sanctuary—your loving relationship.
However, I’m not talking about physical courage here only.
I’m not just referring to the fact that you’d be ready to take a bullet for the person you deeply care for, without thinking twice. Instead, I’m also talking about emotional and spiritual bravery.
First and foremost, love gives you the courage to be your true self. It provides you with a chance to get in touch with your emotions, without having the need to repress them.
It makes you brave enough to give your entire being to another being, without holding any parts of it back. It makes you brave enough to trust someone.
Basically, whenever you say, “I love you,” to someone, you’re giving another person the opportunity to break your heart at any moment. However, you believe that they won’t do so.
In fact, you’re not even afraid. You give your loved one your life in their hands without the fear of them taking advantage of it.
You’re brave enough to be spiritually naked in front of this person. You’re exposing your vulnerabilities and you’re taking a leap into the unknown.
Nothing in this world can make you feel safe as love does. You see, feeling secure is the most important thing for everyone’s mental health.
Being in love and having a happy love life means knowing that there is always someone who has your back. No matter what you do, they will never abandon you or leave you hanging.
This love is your home, your sanctuary and your safe harbor. Something you can return to when everyone else turns their back on you and someone whose feelings you should never doubt.
Skeptics might say that being certain of someone’s love makes you take it for granted. Knowing that you can’t lose another person turns us all into arrogant and haughty people.
Nevertheless, I have to disagree. You see, feeling safe in someone’s arms is one of the best feelings in the world.
Besides, being in love gives you a sense of belonging. It makes you feel like you’ve finally found your place underneath the stars.
There is no more wandering, no more looking for your life purpose and no more searching for yourself. This sensation, that you’re exactly where and next to whom you should be, is priceless.
Let’s be real; it’s not realistic to think that your romantic partner has the ability to protect you from all the evils of this world. After all, they’re not omnipotent, as much as you idealize them.
However, that is not the point. When you were a little kid, I bet you had a stuffed animal or a toy that made you feel safe. Maybe you were afraid of the dark but as long as you held that special toy next to you, you felt safe.
Even back then, you knew that a little stuffed bunny couldn’t really protect you from the monsters under your bed. Nevertheless, you enjoyed the feeling it gave you.
The same happens now; as irrational this safety that love gives you might be, it is comforting. And that is all that matters.
A lot of people will tell you that love makes everyone weak. It has this incredible ability to bring the most powerful man in the world to his knees.
There is some truth about this, I won’t argue against that. However, what many fail to understand is that the absence of love is what makes you fragile.
You break apart once you lose someone you loved. Your heart is crushed into a million pieces when you’re no longer loved by the person who once cared for you.
Agony overwhelms you once you understand that you gave your feelings to the wrong person. You fall into despair when you realize you’ve been played or backstabbed by someone you least expected it from.
So now, the presence of love in your heart doesn’t make you weak.
In fact, a famous quote about love by Lao Tzu says the following: “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone gives you courage.”
Anyone who’s ever been in love can testify to how strong love has made them. No, I’m not talking about physical strength, it’s all about emotional and mental strength.
When you’re in love, you forget about each one of your weaknesses. Your insecurities are far behind you, your self-esteem has reached incredible heights and you’re tougher than ever.
The path to self-love and self-worth
Do you know what the one thing that is more important than romantic love toward your significant other is? It’s the love you feel for yourself.
You see, the relationship you have with yourself should always come first. Therefore, you should be loving the person you are before falling in love with someone else.
However, sadly, this is not often the case. In most scenarios, society turns us into emotionally insecure people who are focused only on our flaws.
If you’re honest with yourself, you’ll see that you’re not an exception either. In fact, the truth is that all of your previous relationships convinced you that you’re not enough.
Your failed romances pushed you onto the path of self-doubts. All of your heartbreaks convinced you that you are not meant to be loved.
Each one of your bad experiences made you question your own self-worth. They turned you into a self-judgmental person without any self-love and self-respect.
However, once you’re loved by the right person, you immediately start seeing yourself through their eyes. At first, you wonder what they see in you but later you realize.
Just like that, you understand that you’re worthy of someone’s love, regardless of what you previously thought. So, you figure out that you should love yourself as well.
After all, if someone else can, what’s preventing you from doing the same?
Also, when you love others, you learn to love yourself as well. You stop being so critical and judgmental and consequently, you give yourself a break.
In fact, this might be the biggest advantage of love and the crucial answer to the question of why is love important: because it takes you onto the path of self-love and self-respect.
Feeling and receiving love is a support structure for loving yourself.
But why is self-love important? Why is it important to love yourself? Well, you can change friends and romantic partners. You can even cut off your family members if you don’t enjoy their presence in your life.
However, what you can’t do is break up with yourself. You’re stuck with yourself for the rest of your life and I bet you don’t want to coexist with someone you despise or have no appreciation for.
Being in love is not obligatory for true happiness. In fact, you can rock your single way of life and be perfectly okay with your life without a man or a woman by your side.
After all, you can’t expect love to come, erase all of your problems and magically make you feel better just like that.
However, the fact is that we’re social beings. We need company and sooner or later, solitude negatively impacts our mental and emotional health. Whether you like to admit it or not, love does increase your overall happiness.
The point is that the sensation of love itself makes you happier, meaning you don’t have to necessarily be in a successful relationship or marriage to feel joy, even though a healthy romance is one of the preconditions for true happiness.
On the other hand, sometimes, it will be enough for you to be open to feeling love and an intimate connection with another human being.
Even if you still haven’t found your great love but hope you will and are ready for that possibility, you’ll be happier than the ones who closed their hearts to the possibility of unconditional love.
Many types of research conclude that commitment-phobes and people who consider themselves unable to love feel less happy than the ones who at least hope that a union with another person will come knocking on their door.
Of course, not every type of love is the same.
You certainly won’t be happy if you’re involved with an abusive or toxic partner, if you’re going through a shattering breakup, if you’re stuck in a relationship that makes you feel miserable or if the love you feel for someone is one-sided.
The last but not least important reason for why is love important is, without a doubt, the health benefits it brings along.
These benefits are not only presumed.
In fact, it has been scientifically proven that being in a happy romantic relationship and experiencing the sensation of love impacts your physical and mental health in more than one way.
According to research, solitude and isolation can be the root causes of depression. Those who spend most of their time alone are more likely to develop depression, which eventually leads to substance abuse.
The next condition that love keeps you safe from is anxiety.
Those couples who manage to preserve a long-term relationship have less possibility of developing anxiety in comparison to single people and the ones who jump from one relationship into another.
Having a healthy relationship equals having a sanctuary. Basically, when you have a romantic partner, you get a companion: someone who helps you share your problems and take over a part of your burden.
Knowing this, it’s perfectly natural to see why couples have an easier time dealing with stress.
When it comes to the physical benefits of love, a lower risk of high blood pressure is the first one on the list.
Those stuck in an unhappy relationship have a higher possibility of developing blood pressure issues. They’re followed by single individuals, while those who are happily in love come in last.
There have also been studies that put love and pain management in direct connection. Yes, you have that right: being in love helps you cope with physical pain better.
Consequently, love gives you a longer life. Not only that, it also gives you a happy life.
3 Facts About Love
Love is the strongest emotion out there
For some, romantic love is probably the strongest type of love and one of the most important things in the world.
Naturally, I’m not talking about just any kind of love here. I’m not talking about temporary passion or romances that mean nothing.
Instead, I’m referring to a once-in-a-lifetime kind of love. About a love which transforms your entire life and which affects the depths of your soul and personality.
When you love someone for real, they become the number one person in your life. Having a happy life without them next to you is utterly impossible.
Being with this person and acquiring a healthy relationship with them becomes your number one goal.
More evidence that supports the importance of love is that love is the root cause of basically everything in this life.
It is what has triggered wars, what inspires art and what makes people ready to behave in a way they never have before.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a psychological theory. Simply put, it is a pyramid of human needs. Abraham Maslow published a work in which he classified and divided into categories all of a person’s needs.
According to this theory, an individual’s motivation moves through each of the stages. However, it cannot level up to the higher stage until all the lower ones are satisfied.
In Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, love is a part of social needs (love and belonging needs). These needs are quite important in the hierarchy since they come right after psychological and safety needs.
Basically, what Maslow claims is that every human being has the need to love and be loved. Of course, this includes romance and intimacy as well.
True love is rare
Realizing how and why is love important, you’ll probably assume that it should and could be found in every corner of the earth. Well, sadly, this is not the case.
In fact, real love is quite rare. It’s not easy to find, so once it appears in your life, make sure you don’t lose it.
To Wrap Up
If you still can’t seem to figure out why is love important, it can only mean one thing: you have never fallen in love for real.
You have never been fully consumed and overwhelmed by this sensation that changes every aspect of your personality and every atom of your being.
However, once this happens, you’ll see its significance and power. All of a sudden, everything will be crystal clear.