So, you’re thinking about moving in together. Congrats! That’s a big step—and not just because you’ll finally get to combine your mismatched furniture and argue over thermostat settings in person.
Before you merge your closets (and possibly your Netflix profiles), it’s worth having a few honest chats. This list covers 10 serious, grown-up things that keep relationships healthy, and 10 lighthearted but surprisingly important quirks that can make or break your domestic bliss. Think: financial goals and how you feel about pineapple on pizza.
Whether you’re already halfway through apartment hunting or just testing the waters, this guide will help you spot potential red flags, discover unexpected dealbreakers, and maybe even fall a little more in love. Ready to find out if love—and your shared Spotify account—can survive the move?
1. Financial Expectations
Money can be a sticky subject, honestly. But it’s crucial to discuss financial expectations before moving in together.
Have an open conversation about how you both view spending, saving, and budgeting. Are you a fan of lavish dinners while your partner is all about home-cooked meals? These differences can cause tension if not addressed early on.
Discuss financial goals, such as saving for a vacation or a big purchase. Remember, financial harmony is not about having the same spending habits but about understanding and respecting each other’s perspectives.
2. Household Chores
Nothing shoots romance faster than an argument over dirty dishes. Before moving in, have a chat about household chores and how you’ll divide them. Is one of you a neat freak while the other is more relaxed about cleanliness? A tip: set realistic expectations.
Create a chore chart if necessary! Detail who is responsible for what tasks and when. This can prevent resentment from building up. This is a partnership, not a parent-child dynamic.
Don’t forget to discuss how you’ll handle unexpected messes or accidents. Having a plan for who deals with what can make all the difference. And if I may give one advice — make this discussion a priority.
3. Personal Space
Living together means sharing physical space, but it’s important to maintain a sense of individuality. Talk about your needs for personal space and time alone. Maybe you need a quiet corner to read, or perhaps your partner enjoys loud music sessions.
It’s perfectly normal to want some “me-time,” so don’t feel guilty about asking for it. Respect each other’s need for solitude and make it a non-negotiable part of your routine.
Consider setting boundaries around shared areas, like using headphones for loud music or designating a specific spot for hobbies.
4. Conflict Resolution
Every relationship has its share of disagreements, but how you handle them makes all the difference. Do you prefer to talk things out immediately, or do you need time to process emotions before addressing issues?
When you understand these preferences it can help prevent unnecessary arguments. Number one rule? Establish ground rules for disagreements, such as avoiding name-calling or storming out during a discussion.
Consider taking a conflict resolution course together or reading a book on the topic.You see, it’s not about who wins an argument but how you grow through it together.
5. Family Involvement
Family can be a source of support or stress in a relationship. Talk about this before, please. A lot!
Are you close-knit with your relatives, or do you prefer a more independent approach? How often do you expect to visit or host family gatherings? It’s important to be on the same page about how much involvement is ideal.
Discuss boundaries regarding family drop-ins and how you’ll handle potential conflicts or differing opinions.You’re building a life together, and it’s vital to have a united front. Family can play an important role, but your relationship is the priority.
6. Career Goals
Are you both career-driven, or does one of you prioritize work-life balance differently? These conversations can reveal potential areas of support or conflict.
Discuss long-term career plans and how they might affect your living situation. Would either of you need to relocate for a job, and how would that impact your relationship? Discussing career goals is crucial for understanding the future.
Don’t forget to discuss how career demands might affect your time together. Balancing work and relationship commitments is key to a harmonious life.
7. Health and Fitness
Health and fitness can greatly impact your lifestyle, so it’s vital to discuss these before moving in together. Are you both fitness enthusiasts, or does one of you prefer a more laid-back approach?
Plan your fitness routines and dietary preferences. Will you be working out together, or do you prefer individual activities?
Consider cooking meals together or planning joint workout sessions. These activities can strengthen your bond and a healthy lifestyle.
8. Future Children
Children are a major consideration for any couple planning their future. Have an open conversation about whether you both want kids, and if so, when and how many. It’s essential to align your views on parenting to avoid future conflicts.
Do you know how children would fit into your lives? Have you considered career goals and lifestyle preferences? Are you ready to make the necessary adjustments, or are there conditions you want to meet first? All legitimate questions.
Talk about your parenting styles and values. This can include discipline, education, and family traditions. Align on these topics! It can create a solid foundation for raising children in a loving and supportive environment.
9. Pet Preferences
Pets can bring joy to a home, but they also require commitment. Before moving in, talk through your pet preferences and any existing animals you might bring into the household. Are you a dog lover, while your partner prefers cats,? Or perhaps neither of you wants pets at all?
Responsibilities such as feeding, walking, and veterinary care make great points for discussion. It’s crucial to agree on who is responsible for what and how you’ll manage pet-related expenses.
Consider discussing potential allergies or fears that might influence your decision about pet ownership. You are responsible for the well-being of any furry friends you choose to include. So, be smart!
10. Living Location
Choosing where to live is a significant decision that impacts your daily lives. How do you stand on the topic of living location? Are you considering factors like proximity to work, access to public transportation, and neighborhood vibe?
Do you prefer urban or suburban settings? Are you looking for a big community or a quiet retreat? These preferences can guide you in selecting a location that suits both your needs.
Are you still with me? Good. Now that we covered the basics let’s get on with the fun but meaningful part of the conversation.
11. Zombie Apocalypse Survival Plan
In the realm of the unexpected, have you considered your partner’s zombie apocalypse survival plan?
Imagine sitting together, crafting strategies that involve the best hiding spots, food rations, and roles each would play. Whether a defense strategist or a gatherer, aligning on this fun yet profound topic can reveal surprising strengths and weaknesses.
It’s not really about surviving zombies (Go figure!). It’s about understanding how each responds to emergencies. Who grabs the canned beans and who wields the bat? This quirky conversation is a playful way to explore practical problem-solving skills. Plus, it’s the ultimate test of teamwork, believe me.
12. Fictional Character Crushes
Do you know your partner’s fictional character crush? It may seem trivial, but this conversation opens a window into their fantasies and ideals. From superheroes to literary figures, these crushes can spark discussions about qualities admired in others.
Picture a debate over dinner — Hermione Granger’s intellect vs. Captain America’s valor.
You’ll gain insights into personality traits that resonate with your partner. Embrace these harmless crushes! They can add a playful element to your relationship. You get some deeper appreciation of each other’s secret worlds.
13. Plant Parenting Styles
Have you ever pondered your plant parenting compatibility? It may seem like a joke but there is a reason for this talk. Discussing how you care for plants can shed light on your nurturing instincts. Do you prefer cacti’s resilience or a fern’s lush demands?
For some, nurturing greenery is a relaxing hobby. For others, it’s a meticulous science. Either way, shared plant responsibilities can highlight patience. Moreover, it can reveal how you approach long-term projects together.
Will you sing to the succulents or strictly follow a watering schedule? This green-thumbed discussion is truly enlightening.
14. Imaginary Travel Adventures
Embark on imaginary travel adventures without leaving the comfort of your living room. Discuss dream destinations, ideal itineraries, and fantasy voyages. Are you drawn to cityscapes or island getaways?
This imaginative dialogue not only uncovers travel preferences but also unearths shared dreams and aspirations. Mapping out these fantasy trips can ignite creativity. And strengthen your bond.
You’ll discover uncharted territories in each other’s minds and hearts. Plus, it’s a delightful way to escape the routine and envision a shared future.
15. Alien Encounter Protocols
What would you do if aliens landed on Earth? Establishing alien encounter protocols might sound outlandish, but it’s a creative exercise in communication and strategy.
Engage in a thoughtful discussion about hypothetical scenarios involving extraterrestrial visitors. Who would initiate contact? What resources would you gather? This imaginative conversation encourages open-mindedness and strategic thinking.
It also highlights your ability to work together under unusual circumstances. So much so if one of you is a Star Wars fan. It’s a win-win situation.
16. Dream Superpowers
Discussing dream superpowers can be an entertaining and revealing exercise. Have you ever imagined having superpowers? Is it flying, invisibility, or telepathy? Never mind, because these fantasies reflect deeper desires or aspects of personality.
This whimsical topic can offer insights into what each values or fears. Are you drawn to the power of healing or the thrill of speed? Such discussions can be light-hearted yet profound.
And that makes your bond even more extraordinary.
17. Signature Dance Moves
Unleash your inner dancer by sharing signature dance moves.
Whether you’re a disco lover or tango enthusiast — dancing is a joyful expression of self.
Discuss and demonstrate your favorite moves! It can be a delightful way to connect. Are you the moonwalker or the waltz wizard?
This way you explore each other’s comfort zones and willingness to try new things. This energetic discussion can lead to impromptu dance-offs and fill your home with rhythm and joy.
18. Bizarre Food Combinations
Here comes that aforementioned pineapple on pizza. Or just picture this: a fun evening experimenting with chocolate-covered pickles or spaghetti tacos. Yay or nay?
If you have trouble finding a relevance in this (not so much) delicious subject, let me break it to you.
This unique topic it’s not merely about taste. It’s an exploration of adventurous spirit and adaptability. Embrace the unexpected, and you may discover a new favorite dish together.
19. Mystery Book Club
Why not start a mystery book club for two? It’s the perfect way to dive into suspenseful stories together—whether you’re into classic whodunits or edge-of-your-seat thrillers.
As you unravel twists and turns, you’ll be building more than just theories… you’ll be deepening your connection.
Trade clues over coffee, debate suspects over dinner, and see who can predict the ending first. Are you the ultimate detective duo, or the reigning plot-twist champion?
This literary adventure isn’t just about reading—it’s about thinking as a team, sparking great conversations, and discovering hidden layers in both the story and each other.
20. Time Travel Scenarios
Ever fantasized about traveling through time? Exploring time travel scenarios together isn’t just fun—it can spark deep conversations.
Would you journey back to ancient civilizations or fast-forward to witness future innovations? Your answers can reveal hidden passions, values, and dreams.
This imaginative “what if” opens the door to creativity, curiosity, and even a little philosophy—touching on everything from history and human nature to your shared sense of wonder. It’s a playful yet profound way to connect, offering a glimpse into how each of you sees the world… past, present, and future.