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5 Emotional Bonds That Can Scar You For Life

5  Emotional Bonds That Can Scar You For Life

Emotions are like fuel to our soul and without them, we wouldn’t be called humans.

But sometimes our emotions can deceive us and trick us to believe that what we’re doing is good for us.

We’re all programmed to bond with others, we all have a desire to be liked by others and we all crave to be protected and loved.

And sometimes our desire to experience all of this makes us blind to reality.

Sometimes we unknowingly decide to live in an illusion, thinking that our love is real and what we’re feeling is real.

We choose to become too close too soon because we want to feel the power of love.

We want to feel like we’re important to someone and we want it at any cost.

But we’re not aware of any of it. We’re just aware of this strong urge for emotional attachment and that is why we choose to do anything to make it happen.

We choose to live in an illusion that we’ve met our soulmate even though we’ve known each other for less than a week.

These types of unhealthy emotional attachments can scar us for life and that is why we should always be aware of them before it gets too late!

1. Becoming too close too soon

Becoming too close too soon means developing feelings for someone new in record time and being convinced that they are your soulmate and you belong together.

Sometimes this might be the case because it’s possible to meet your soulmate and develop strong feelings for them earlier than usual.

But if this happens often, it means it’s an unhealthy emotional attachment because of the strong urge to experience love no matter what.

That is why our brain convinces us that that a specific person is our soulmate and that we’re in love with them even though we’ve known them for two days.

This kind of behavior usually stems from our childhood.

If our parents didn’t give us enough love during our childhood, we turn into adults who are thirsty for the feeling of being loved and accepted.

And that is why our brain tricks us to believe that we’ve found ‘the one’ even though the reality is totally different.

See also: 7 Signs You Have An Insecure Attachment Style

2. Being clingy instead of loving

Being clingy basically means being needy and if you feel like you need that one specific person in your life and you cannot live with that person, this has nothing to do with love.

This one goes together with the previous one.

Becoming too close too soon and thinking that you can’t live without that person is an unhealthy attachment style and not true love.

Healthy love is developed over time and it’s not dependent on physical appearance, style or similar.

Healthy love consists of getting to know each other’s fears, wishes, dreams and personality and developing your feelings gradually over time.

3. Overidentifying with strangers

This one is about people who find themselves strongly attached to those who show them the slightest amount of attention like a smile, being paid compliments, being offered help with something and similar. 

When a stranger does something nice for such individuals, they immediately link this with a stranger’s affection for them because they exaggerate the importance of it.

They do this because of their strong urge to establish an emotional attachment due to being neglected in that aspect during their childhood or later on. 

These individuals tend to develop strong feelings for strangers and they are convinced that they feel the same about them, even though it’s all just an illusion.

4. Feeling overly connected to people who hold some kind of power

This unhealthy emotional attachment is about wanting something that you yourself don’t have.

It’s about feeling overly connected to people who hold some kind of power because you idolize them for their certain abilities, good looks and similar.

For example, they become overly connected with actors because they are perceived as positive by the masses and they have something powerful that makes them worthy in the eyes of the public.

These individuals are convinced that they can receive love from them and they think that they are the only people who can understand them and make them feel worthy again.

5. Constantly seeking some sort of relational validation

Due to a lack of confidence and self-love, some people start to blindly pursue the latest trends, become obsessed with stars and their perfect bodies and similar.

They start thinking that they should fix all of their ‘flaws’ and look like their idols to be worthy of love and admiration.

This attitude causes them to end up in an unhealthy emotional attachment because of thinking that their body, hair and everything else need to be perfect and recognized by others as such and that only then will they be worthy of being with that someone whom we admire and support.

This behavior forces people to pretend that they’re something they’re really not and it destroys their initial personality.

The constant pursuit of perfection and validation from others is a vicious cycle that can destroy our well-being and scar us for life.