When your mind is busy, it’s not unusual to get overwhelmed and easily distracted, but the good thing about our mind is that it can always find a way to process things and let go at some point.
But when it comes to your heart, it’s not that simple.
Our hearts are too tender. They hold so much love, joy, happiness, sadness, anger, resentment and that is hard to process all at once.
When it comes to our hearts, they are the most vulnerable part of us, and when they get heavy, it can get really dark for us.
Our hearts take on too much sometimes, and it takes a real toll on us. They don’t let go as easily as our heads, and they make us ask questions like:
- Why am I feeling this way?
- Is this feeling ever going to pass?
- How will I get through this?
- Does anyone even understand me?
And sometimes it’s hard to find a way out of it. You feel trapped with no way to escape.
You shut down from the world and decide you’re done opening up. It makes you feel suffocated, and so you just disconnect because it’s easier that way.
That is when you become apathetic, borderline depressed and closed off from everyone that loves you and wants to help. You start feeling lonely and helpless with nothing to motivate you to move forward.
It is common knowledge that the heart wants what the heart wants, but you’re not helpless!
There are ways to soothe your soul and to lighten your heavy heart. You just have to be willing to try.
Here are some ways that have helped me cope when I was feeling at my darkest, and that truly helped lighten my heavy heart and get me back to the girl I knew I was.
I hope they can help you as much as they did me.
Start writing everything down
This easy step can help you let go of all those emotions that are troubling you and not letting you breathe easily.
When you transfer all your thoughts on a piece of paper, you will feel a sense of relief and comfort, as you have managed to somehow express them and move them from your heart to somewhere where they cannot burden you as much.
I have learned the hard way that when you are reacting from an angry place, you say things that you later wish you never had.
You usually let your emotions get the best of you, and you end up severely overreacting and regretting it soon after.
This is why it is smart to write down whatever is causing you distress, as when you’re writing it, you are slowly letting go of it, and your mind is clearer and less likely to act with impulse.
Instead, you process this in a healthy way and react from a stable, calm place.
Try to find a blessing in every hardship
When you are going through difficult things that are making it hard for you to think and feel clearly, it can be a real challenge to see that something good might actually come out of it.
In every tragedy, in every heartbreak and in every challenging period, there is a blessing in disguise.
It is not always easy to see it, and it can make you insane trying to find it, but it’s there.
Sometimes it’s important to just let yourself go through whatever you need to go through, in order to realize some things after it has passed.
Those blessings usually come in the form of a epiphanies that makes you see exactly why that thing had to happen.
It was meant to teach you something. Perhaps it was supposed to make you see your strength and help realize how much more resilient you are than you thought!
Whatever struggle you are going through, be open to it teaching you something.
There is goodness in every situation and when you have hope, you will always be open to good things.
Give yourself time to heal
Don’t rush into anything. Don’t ask yourself how long it will take you to heal from this.
Each thing takes the time that is necessary to get back to a healthy place, and rushing it won’t make it happen faster. It will only cause you more inner stress.
Give it time. Healing is a process that takes time, and nobody can tell you the exact amount of time it is going to take you to get over somebody or to recover from a tragedy.
The heart has its tempo. It’s going to be a process, so don’t rush yourself.
You know yourself better than anyone, and when you start feeling that weight is lifted from your shoulders, you will know you’re on your way.
Take action
When you are in that sunken place, and you feel hopeless and helpless, the easiest thing is to let yourself deteriorate.
It doesn’t take any effort. You just stop trying, stop thinking and let it destroy you from the inside out.
But the brave thing is to take action. Take matters into your own hands. Be the one who decides that enough is enough and start doing something that will help you get better!
Sometimes, the smallest victories are the ones that end up making the biggest difference. You can’t help everyone in this world, but look around you.
Find that one person who you know you can help, and then do it! Make that person feel better than you are feeling right now.
This is going to make you feel immeasurably less anxious, and it will leave you with a sense of purpose.
Don’t let anyone tell you that you are not enough or that your gift is not enough. It is!
You are amazing, and you are capable of much more than you think right now. Don’t let your heavy heart mess with your perception of yourself.
Being a contributor in somebody else’s happiness will help lighten your heavy heart.
Share your heavy heart
In times of sadness and grief, the worst thing you can do for yourself is isolate yourself and not let anyone in.
I know that it’s the easiest thing to do… and that you don’t feel like sharing nor are you able to explain the amount of sorrow you are feeling. So it’s easier to keep it inside.
But the courageous thing to do is call a friend, family member or your partner.
Anyone who you are close to and who you know can help you in this trying time, without needing anything in return.
Somebody who will want to be there because your happiness means the world to them.
Be brave to ask for help. Share your sadness. Help them help you! You just might find somebody who can sympathize with you as they have gone through the same thing.
Sharing is caring! It’s not just a cliché. It’s the truth.
When you are able to take that first step and talk to somebody without holding anything in, that is proof right there that you are doing much better than you think.
So give somebody a chance to be a contributor in your happiness, and get to that healthy place again.
Leave yourself open to finding your light again, and don’t let your heavy heart darken it.
This feeling that is consuming you will pass. You just have to go through the hard part first, before finding your guiding light again.