Cuando un chico te cuenta cosas personales sobre sí mismo

Cuando un tío te cuenta cosas personales sobre sí mismo, quiere que le conozcas and form a deeper bond with you. It’s because he either feels safe with you as a friend or he’s interested in you romantically.

But there’s another possibility that shouldn’t be ignored: he might not really be opening up to you, but making you think he is para manipularte.

You’ll have to pay close attention to his behavior to work out what he’s all about, but if you keep reading you’ll get enough tips to figure out where you stand in no time.

¿Qué significa que un chico te cuente cosas personales sobre sí mismo?

Sharing your feelings, your history or your inner self isn’t easy, but the desire for the other person to know you pushes you to do it anyway. When a guy tells you personal things about himself, you can be almost sure that compartís una conexión emocional.

Whether he wants a romantic relationship or to deepen your friendship, there’s a growing bond between you

1. Confía en ti

Abrirse a ti es una de las señales claras de que confía en ti. Lleva tiempo generar confianza, so your relationship isn’t entirely new. If it is and he’s opening up, he might have a problem. More on that below.

Contarte cómo creció en su pueblo natal, su ruptura más dolorosa o abrirse sobre un problema actual demuestra que tiene un grado de familiaridad contigo que sólo se consigue con una conexión y confianza.

2. Se siente seguro contigo

A medida que una relación progresa, la gente pasa lentamente de las conversaciones superficiales y la información biográfica a algo más profundo.

Seguro que sabes cuántos hermanos tiene, pero puede que no te cuente enseguida la historia de cómo se hizo la pequeña cicatriz en la mejilla porque tiene un significado más profundo.

When he decides to tell you the story about how he got it, you’ll know that se siente seguro y cómodo contigo.

3. Siente una conexión emocional

Si un tipo siente un conexión emocional with you, you’ll probably feel it too because it’s something that grows instead of springs up fully formed. It takes effort to connect emotionally, and you’ve both done your best.

Abrirse puede ser una señal de que siente un vínculo contigo and that you’ve earned the right to know personal things about him.

4. Quiere profundizar en vuestra relación

Una forma de hacer avanzar una relación es deja entrar a la otra persona. If he’s interested in deepening your connection, he might start by sharing details about his own life, feelings and things that matter.

Quiere acercarse a ti, así que he’s taking the first step. After you’re sure that you want to, you can reciprocate.

5. Valora tus pensamientos y opiniones

A veces, cuando un chico comparte un problema contigo, quiere oír lo que piensas. Si te pide que comentes o le des una solución, te demuestra que valora tu forma de pensar y tu criterio.

When you know that he wants you to give him advice, don’t hesitate to be honest. If he appreciates your opinions, he won’t mind it, but don’t forget to still have compassion and act with kindness.

6. Quiere que le entiendas

If he’s sharing personal details that he might be sensitive about, such as mental health issues, insecurities or family problems, he’s showing a great deal of vulnerability and trust because he wants you to understand him.

Honra su valentía y fortaleza apoyándole y tranquilizándole, sobre todo si quieres que siga compartiendo contigo sus asuntos privados.

7. Quiere que conozcas a su verdadero yo

For most people, the innermost self is the most private thing of all. We display different personas in different contexts in our lives, and the smallest, most true part of what makes someone who they are only comes out once they’re on their own.

Si un chico se abre a ti y shows you what he’s like when he’s on his ownquiere que le conozcas. Mostrándote sus miedos más profundos and brightest dreams, he’s showing you that he’s eager for you to know him.

8. Quiere que le aceptes

Everyone is flawed, but we all want to have someone who accepts those flaws. If he’s going deep and sharing things he’s ashamed or proud of, if he’s sharing his past relationships, childhood traumas or brightest hopes, he’s laying himself bare for you to accept him.

However big or small whatever he shares is, if you take it in with an open mind, you’ll understand him better. And it’s up to you to accept it or not.

9. Quiere conocerte mejor

Sharing his personal life is an invitation for you to share yours too. Don’t jump in and make the moment about you, but keep in mind that you have someone who’ll listen también cuando lo necesites.

Tu respuesta a su apertura también le dirá cosas sobre ti y le animará a compartir de nuevo o le disuadirá de contarte cosas personales.

10. You’re special to him

Being able to tell you personal things is a clear sign that you matter to him, as a friend or as a potential partner. Either way, by opening up to you he’s showing you that you’re one of the rare people who has access to his private matters.

It’s a sign that te aprecia and values you, that you’re special to him and he wants you to know it.

¿Cómo responder cuando un chico habla de su vida privada?

¿Qué hace falta para abrirse a alguien? El valor de ser emocionalmente vulnerable, first and foremost, but also the trust that the other person won’t let you down. More than anything else, however, it’s the deseo de estar cerca de otra persona.

¿Qué hacer cuando un chico se abre a ti?

1. Saber escuchar

Escúchalo con la intención de comprender. Don’t interrupt, assume or judge. En lugar de esperar tu turno para hablar, céntrate en él.

He might or might not want a reply, so while he’s speaking, it’s best to only try to escucharle y empatizar con él.

Give an indication that you’re listening by nodding, through body language or by repeating what he said to make sure you understood.

2. Asegúrele que sus sentimientos son válidos

After someone has opened up about something important to them, they might regret it and worry whether they’ve done the right thing. Tranquilícelo haciéndole saber que aprecia que compartiera asuntos personales contigo.

If he’s struggling with what he told you, recuérdale que sus sentimientos son válidos. Let him know that it’s okay to feel the way he feels and that he made the right choice to share it.

3. Pregúntele qué necesita

Cuando alguien confía en ti, puede que necesiten consejo o simplemente una oreja amiga. Tal vez sólo quería sentirse comprendido y ahora se siente mejor después de compartirlo contigo.

Unless you know for sure that he’s looking for a solution, don’t offer one. It’s best to ask him if he wants advice or if he only needs to talk.

¿Cómo saber si un chico quiere ser algo más que un amigo?

So when a guy tells you personal things about himself, you know that you’re definitely special to him, but how can you tell if he sees you as his best friend or if he’s in love with you?

Éstas son todas las señales de que quiere que seamos algo más que amigos.

1. Coquetea contigo

Friends sometimes flirt with each other, but if he wants to be more than friends, his flirting won’t be friendly. Instead, he’ll flirt with a passion that betrays how he feels.

2. Te felicita

If he never fails to find something about you to compliment, that’s because he likes so many things about you that he never runs out of something to talk about.

3. Sus ojos siempre están puestos en ti

If he’s always looking at you, he likes what he sees. There’s nothing friendly about his pointed stare or his lidded gaze always directed at you, always following you.

4. Te toca casualmente

Romantic interest is most obvious in body language and behavior. He’ll always find a way to touch you in a casual way, such as holding a handshake too long, placing his fingers on the small of your back as you’re walking and any other way.

5. Le hace preguntas personales

He tells you personal things about himself, but he’s also endlessly curious about you. He’s opening up and wants you to open up too.

6. Se da cuenta de cosas sobre ti

He notices everything, and everything matters. Because you’re the most interesting person to him, he’s paying attention and noticing things about you – from your gestures and way of talking to small changes.

7. Recuerda pequeños detalles sobre ti

If he surprises you by knowing something small that you’d never think someone would remember about you, it’s because nothing about you is irrelevant to him. The little things about you are more interesting and memorable than anything else.

8. He’s interested in things you’re interested in

It’s not that your likes and dislikes become his too, but that he gives things a chance because he trusts your judgment. If you like something, it must be amazing, right?

9. Habla de ti con otras personas

He can’t shut up about you, so he doesn’t. If you’re his favorite topic, it’s a good sign that you’re always on his mind and nothing holds the same interest as you do.

10. Intenta hacerte reír

It’s well known that laughing together increases attraction. When he’s being silly trying to get you to laugh, he isn’t only doing it for you, but also for himself – seeing you laugh makes him happy too.

11. He doesn’t like it when you talk to other guys

Whenever your male friends or random guys talk to you, he sulks. If he’s showing a small degree of jealousy, it’s because he’s interested in you and he’s hoping you won’t get together with anyone else.

12. He doesn’t show interest in others

If he gives you his full attention when you’re together even if there are lots of other people around, it’s a sure sign that he likes you. Others just aren’t as cute and cool and sexy as you. In fact, no one can compare.

13. He’s different with you than with anyone else

You’re special, so you get special treatment. If he’s more gentle and caring with you than his other friends, he’s atraído emocionalmente a ti.

14. Inicia mucho el contacto

Por teléfono, mensaje de texto, redes sociales o en persona, no tiene ningún problema en ponerse en contacto contigo primero. En lugar de mantener la calma y jugar, te dice cuando te echa de menos.

15. Quiere pasar tiempo contigo

Spending time together is what dating is all about. If you’re already friends even though you technically never even had a first date. Maybe you can even skip casual dating and go straight to a serious relationship?

16. Se burla juguetonamente de ti

Playful teasing and having fun together is a sign of a healthy relationship. If you’re not in a romantic relationship yet, make sure to keep enjoying each other’s company the same way once you do.

17. Se asegura de que sepas que puedes confiar en él

A sure sign that he wants to take things to the next level is if he constantly shows concern for your well-being and makes sure you know that you can count on him if you need something. He’s vulnerable contigo y no teme exponerse.

18. Se desvive por ti

One of the most obvious signs of interest is if, for him, nothing is too difficult when it comes to you. If he’s willing to go to the opposite end of the city just to pick up your favorite food, he probably wants to be more than friends with you.

19. Le habla de sus planes de futuro

When he talks to you about his future and includes you in them, is not only a sign that he wants something more, but that he wants a serious relationship. He’s including you in his life now and wants to include you going forward.

20. Intenta que le veas de esa manera

Cuando conoces a un chico en busca de romance y desde el principio lo consideras una pareja potencial, las cosas son diferentes que si primero surge una amistad entre vosotros.

In that case, it might take some work to transition from friends to romantic interests, so if he’s trying hard to change your impression of him from friend to potential boyfriend, it’s a sign that he likes you.

¿Cómo saber si un chico es sincero?

La sinceridad y la vulnerabilidad son claves para establecer vínculos afectivos, pero algunas personas utilizan la franqueza o la apariencia de franqueza para ganar algo.

This isn’t always malicious – some people simply carecen de inteligencia emocional para formar vínculos con los demás e intentar hacerlo de la manera equivocada. Otros, sin embargo, intentan manipularte.

¿Cómo saber si las cosas personales que te cuenta son ciertas? Aquí tienes algunas señales.

1. Sus historias son coherentes

If he were manipulating you, all of his stories would serve a certain purpose, so he’d have to change things up to make them fit. If it seems that the las cosas que te dice se contradicen, puede que no te esté diciendo la verdad.

2. The things he tells you don’t always need an emotional reaction

Sometimes people share just to share, but when someone is trying to gain something from a personal story, they’ll always do it a través de las emociones.

En lugar de contarte algo personal porque quiere que lo sepas, te cuenta una historia para ganar lástima, admiración u otra reacción emocional.

3. He’s not suspicious when you ask him follow-up questions

A person who’s telling the truth has enough information about the topic to be able to answer any follow-up questions without panicking.

Someone who’s lying or making things up will necesito tiempo para pensarlo, so you’ll often hear typical liar techniques for delaying answers to invent them.

4. He’s not manipulating eye contact

Cuando alguien miente, mantiene contacto visual a propósito para hacerte creer que no tienen nada que ocultar, así que te miran demasiado a los ojos. Conversely, if they don’t know that they’re supposed to look you in the eyes, they’ll evitar su mirada.

If he’s honest, eye contact will be natural and not premeditated.

5. He’s not vague or overly detailed

Construir mentiras es complejo, así que los mentirosos either invent too many details and get lost in them, or they don’t say anything excepto el marco básico de la mentira.

An honest person might forget things, but even if they don’t recall all the information, they remember the feelings they were experiencing at the time they’re telling you about.

¿Cómo saber si un chico te está manipulando al abrirse?

He’s manipulating you abriendo si:

• He wants a specific emotional reaction from you.

• He’s telling you exactly what you want to hear.

• He evades your questions.

• He ignores your responses.

• He insists you listen even if you’re not interested.

• He’s using vulnerability instead of being vulnerable.

• It feels like he’s trying to force intimacy.

• He’s telling you things that are too private for the level of closeness you share.

• He expects something in return.

• His stories seem tailored to show him in a good light.

Más razones por las que un chico podría contarte cosas personales

Sometimes guys have an agenda behind opening up even though they don’t mean to manipulate you. Here are some reasons.

1. Comparte en exceso

If he’s opening up to you because he feels like the relationship you’ve created together is at the level where you have se ganó el derecho a escuchar lo que tiene que decir and he does it because he wants to, it tells you that he feels that you’re the right person to tell things.

When you don’t know each other well or your relationship isn’t the kind where you’d share personal things and he still does, it’s because he’s trying to manufacture a connection demasiado pronto. Compartir demasiado suele ser un signo de estar necesitado y depender de otras personas para ser feliz.

2. He’s going through something

If he has something stressful going on and he’s feeling emotionally fragile, venting helps distraerle de sus problemas. If you care about wellness, give him a listening ear and think about what’s going on between the two of you after he’s back to normal.

3. Quiere consejo

Sometimes he shares because he needs advice and you’re the best candidate to get it from. When it’s just about solving his problem, it’s usually just about that and doesn’t really impact your relationship. Still, it points out that he values your advice.

4. He wants attention and knows you’ll listen

When he’s in need of attention and knows that you’ll give it to him, it’s to be expected that he’ll run to you when he wants some and he’ll tell you something that will turn the spotlight on him.

Esto es probablemente inofensivo si su relación es de otra manera recíproco y feliz.

5. He’s testing you

If he wants to see whether he can trust you with something or behaves in a way that specifically triggers an emotional response, he might be playing mind games and testing you to see how you’ll react. He might or might not realize it, but this is manipulative and underhanded.

En resumen

When a guy tells you personal things about himself, you’ll know why it’s happening if you think about everything else going on in your relationship.

You first need to consider if he’s being honesto y sincero or if he’s tratando de ganar algo de ti contándote una historia.

If you decide that you trust him and if you like that he’s opening up to you, you’re lucky. You either have un amigo íntimo que comparte cosas personales contigo o alguien a quien le gustes. By paying attention to his other behaviors you’ll be able to tell which.