Mi ansiedad me convence de que todo el mundo me odia

Mi ansiedad me hace ser muy inseguro. Me tomo las cosas demasiado a pecho.

When I call my friends and they don’t answer right away, it automatically gets me thinking that they don’t want to talk to me, that they are angry with me.

Siempre me planteo el peor escenario posible en el que yo tenga el papel protagonista.

Me aterran esas situaciones en las que puede haber la más mínima posibilidad de que alguien me rechace. Odio encontrarme en ese tipo de situaciones.

Me hace sentir aún más insegura de lo que ya estoy.

When I think someone has rejected me, I feel like I’m totally invisible and unimportant. I feel like no one cares about me.

Incluso cuando me devuelven el texto, lo examino en profundidad. Analizo el posible tono del texto. Me pregunto qué es lo que realmente querían decir.

Me vienen a la cabeza millones de preguntas: Am I boring? They don’t want to talk to me, why did I even send the text in the first place?

It doesn’t matter with whom or in which situation, but I just have to be sure that the person I find important in my life loves me.

Tengo que sentirme segura y querida porque me hace sentir aliviada. Me hace sentir que no va a pasar nada malo.

Al contrario, se me ocurrirá el peor desenlace posible. En realidad, mi cabeza va a dirigir una historia de terror en lugar de una de amor, y apartaré a esas personas de mi vida sólo por mi ansiedad.

My anxiety forces me to overthink everything. If my friends tell me they can’t make it to our date tonight because they are tired or have to work late, I won’t believe them.

I won’t even consider the possibility they are telling me the truth. I’ll overthink what they’ve said and come up with an answer like: “They don’t want to be friends with me anymore.”

My anxiety makes me pessimistic—like if anything has the option of going wrong, it will. I always have the feeling that the whole world is against me, that everyone is out to get me.

I have the feeling that I’m so vulnerable, and I can’t do anything about it.

It’s almost impossible to think positively when nothing goes your way.

I’m so clumsy in social situations. I never fit in anywhere I go.

I’m just not cut out to be like everyone else, like the ‘normal’ people.

It’s so hard for me to talk to people. I barely talk to the ones I’ve known for years—let alone a stranger in the supermarket.

Siempre asumo que no le gusto a nadie y que quieren alejarse de mí lo más posible.

I don’t like dating because of all this. I never get if the person talking to me is really interesado en mí, o sólo está siendo amable?

Even if they tell me they like me, I won’t believe them. I  know it’s just a matter of time until they leave me because they’ve seen the real me, and they don’t like it.

Mi ansiedad me hace faltar al respeto. Me hace pensar que no soy ni seré nunca lo bastante bueno.

So when people around me say they love me or say that I’m beautiful, I don’t believe them. Why would anyone think anything nice of me? It’s just impossible because I’m none of those things.

Because of my anxiety, I can’t see how much I’m worth. I see only flaws.

Si te gusta Maria Parker, lee su último libro, “On Getting Over A Narcissist”.