Qué buscar en un chico: 25 cualidades de un hombre de verdad
What do you look for in a guy when dating? How do you differentiate a real man from “an almost man”?
Dark, handsome, tall, green eyes?… and the list goes on and on. Since the beginning of time, women have been making real or imaginary lists of “the perfect man” according to their standards (or according to society’s standards).
Some women solely focus on the physical qualities of a man while others look at the bigger picture. But, what’s common to every single woman on earth is the fact that we all stop at one moment to ask ourselves:
“Wait, what SHOULD we even look for in men? Should we look for perfection or rely on expectativas razonables?”
Worry not. Today, we’ll unravel the myths and mysteries of an ideal man.
¿Qué suelen buscar las chicas en un chico?
Let’s not fool ourselves. Girls usually look for a good-looking guy (just like the majority of guys do when it comes to girls). There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that except for one thing:
Un chico guapo con un interior terrible (personalidad) no es el tipo de hombre quieres estar en un relación romántica con. Punto.
I don’t know about you, but I personally am looking for a man who knows what he’s doing, and by that, I mean a man with his shit together.
To the world, this type of man is usually known as ‘un hombre unicornio‘ that a few women have the privilege to meet. Why?
Because they’re becoming extinct.
A man who cares about his family and friends, a man who is passionate and has goals in life, who knows how to make a woman laugh… a man who supports his loved ones through the ups and downs is REALLY hard to find nowadays.
But, ladies, this doesn’t mean we should lower our standards (because estar en una situación no es una opción).
Instead, we should make the list of qualities that define a real man that every girl deserves to be with! So, let’s do it!
¿Qué buscas en un chico?
¿Qué buscas en un chico cuando sales con alguien? Atracción física seguramente es importante, pero nunca debería ser un factor decisivo. Hay cualidades mucho más importantes que buscar en un hombre aparte de su aspecto:
1. Un gran solucionador de problemas
Dear ladies, I can’t accentuate enough how important this quality is in a man because everything stems from it. A man who is a problem solver won’t hide or run away from you once things become complicated.
Instead, he will roll up his sleeves and deal with any issue at hand because he’s a problem solver and not a runner. Esto incluye tanto los problemas de tu vida personal (y la de él) como los de tu vida amorosa.
You certainly don’t want to be with a guy who can’t handle a little stress in his life or in a relationship. Weak men are the type of men you can’t rely on. Strong men are problem-solvers.
2. Encontrar un resquicio de esperanza es su especialidad
If there’s one thing I hate most, it is people who can’t look on the bright side even if their life depended on it. I’m talking about eternal pessimists whose negative thoughts can drain even the most optimistic individuals.
Hazte un favor y evita estar con un hombre así. En lugar de eso, elige a un hombre que sepa encontrar un resquicio de esperanza en cualquier situación. A man whose levels of optimism are stable and don’t get easily reduced by trivial events.
¿Por qué elegir a un hombre así?
Because life is too short to be with someone who can’t see the beauty of life even if you slapped them in the face with it. Ups and downs are inevitable, but choosing how to react to life’s events is a matter of choice.
Si me preguntas, debería estar científicamente demostrado que estar con un hombre optimista es una de las ingredientes clave para una relación feliz.
3. He’s ambitious
According to my previous romantic endeavors, I’ve realized that men who lack ambition are a huge turn-off. There’s something truly mesmerizing when you look in the eye of a man who has his goals set and knows exactly what he wants to pursue in life.
Such men have become a rare occurrence (or they’re already taken). Estar con un hombre ambicioso te da una sensación de seguridad, porque un hombre así no sólo está orientado al presente, sino que tiene planes para el futuro.
Este tipo de hombre tiene una rutina de entrenamiento establecida, cuida su salud y actualiza su lista de objetivos y logros con regularidad.
No, he doesn’t only sit with crossed arms hoping that the universe and la ley de la atracción will do everything for him so he doesn’t need to lift a finger. Instead, he’s realistic and persistent.
4. Madurez emocional
Can you even imagine how many potential relationships have failed mainly due to men’s emotional immaturity? I’m not saying that women can’t be emotionally mature, but in this context, we’re referring to men.
Entonces, ¿qué significa ser maduro en el aspecto emocional?
It basically means that a person doesn’t have problems making decisions in life and relationships, and is not afraid of commitment.
Emotionally mature men aren’t afraid of feelings, but they embrace them. They don’t run away when things become serious, but they stay.
Toda mujer debe buscar a un hombre que sea sincero con sus sentimientos, porque ésa es la receta para el éxito de una relación. Todo lo demás son complicaciones innecesarias.
5. Sigue sus propias normas morales
Otra buena cualidad de un hombre de verdad, y una de las reglas clave de las citases un gran sentido de la integridad. Vivimos en un mundo en el que los ideales falsos son tendencia, mientras que los valores reales están enterrados en nuestro subconsciente.
A man who has integrity follows his own moral standards and isn’t satisfied with mediocrity. He’s not indifferent or mindless about things going on around him.
He thinks outside the box, thinks about others, and strives to find a deeper meaning in everything. Being with such a man means knowing where you stand because he won’t allow his impulses to corrupt his reason.
6. He’s caring and protective of his loved ones
One of the surefire ways to know if he’s a man who will make you feel safe both emotionally and physically is to look at how he treats other people in his life.
Is he caring and protective of his loved ones (best friends and family)? Or, is he self-centered and doesn’t really care about other people in his life except himself?
En general, los hombres tienen ese deseo innato de proteger a sus mujeres y ser sus héroes. There’s actually a step-by-step guide on how to trigger a man’s hero instinctpero esta es una historia para otro día.
Basically, what I’m trying to say is that men want to see themselves as protectors and providers because this is in their nature, but there are always exceptions.
Another surefire way to know if he’s a real protector is to observe his behavior when something bad happens. Does he run away or stay and offer help and protection? Hmm…
7. Tiene buen sentido del humor
“If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.” – Marilyn Monroe
Hacer reír a alguien requiere un conjunto especial de habilidades (inteligencia, ingenio y creatividad). Por lo tanto, un hombre con un gran sentido del humor no es un hombre que sólo puede hacer reír.
He’s a man who is intelligent, fun, and creative. He doesn’t take himself too seriously, and he wants his woman to enjoy every second spent with him.
Quiere que su mujer se ría y se lo pase bien, porque el sentido del humor es un gran alivio para el estrés, muy necesario hoy en día.
Así que, sí, me niego a estar con un hombre que esté 24/7 serio, hablando sólo de trabajo. Quiero un hombre que me haga reír a carcajadas de múltiples maneras.
I want a man with whom I’ll be able to make a list of internal jokes… a man who is strong enough to make me laugh even when the whole world is falling apart.
8. Te respeta
If a man doesn’t know how to respect a woman, this is a huge red flag. Any type of disrespect shouldn’t be tolerated because a woman needs to know her worth.
Real men respect their women; they don’t abuse them or make them feel less worthy. Be with a woman who will both respect you and motivate you to keep working on yourself.
Don’t be with a man who looks for perfection because that doesn’t exist. Also, don’t be with a man who wants to change who you are because that’s not acceptable.
A man who respects his woman will never make her question his intentions, and will never make her feel like she’s ordinary (one of the reasons why I’m still single).
“Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.” – Oscar Wilde
Enamórate de un hombre que te trate como a una delicada flor y nunca deje de mostrar su asombro ante tus bellos colores. Enamórate de un hombre que te haga sentir especial sin siquiera intentarlo.
9. Comprende que el amor y las relaciones requieren sacrificio y esfuerzo
Yes, this is one of the most important things women look for in a guy because EFFORT is hot. I’m so tired of men who want everything, but aren’t ready to invest themselves in anything they do.
Entonces, ¿qué buscas en un chico?
Busca a un hombre que conozca la importancia del sacrificio y el esfuerzo en las relaciones y en la vida en general. Cualquier hombre puede quedarse en tu vida cuando todo va bien, pero solo unos pocos están dispuestos a luchar por lo que creen.
So, look for a man who will fight for you and your relationship no matter what…. a man who knows that relationships are hard work that requires constant maintenance.
10. Rezuma confianza
Ladies, is there anything hotter than a guy who is self-confident in both his words and actions? I bet there isn’t, and that is why this is one of the top qualities we should ALWAYS look for in a guy. Why?
Porque un hombre seguro de sí mismo te hará sentirse seguro de sí mismo. He will know exactly what he wants, and he won’t allow his insecurities to ruin your relationship.
Now, I’m not talking about those ‘wannabe confident men’ who fake their confidence. I’m talking about men who make goals early in a relationship, stick to their promises, and apologize when needed.
Being with such a man means having someone to rely on without fearing that he’ll run away once things get serious. Because men do that!
But, mature men who ooze confidence rarely make the mistake of losing a good woman just because they didn’t set their priorities at the moment. They can’t afford to make such a mistake because they know the value of such a woman.
11. Amabilidad y consideración
I don’t know if you’re aware of the fact that being with a man who is not kind or thoughtful equals a legit nightmare. How do I know that? Well, I’ve been with such a guy and I regretted it big time.
La cuestión es que estos dos valores están interconectados. Si un chico no es amable, no será considerado, y viceversa.
La amabilidad y la consideración son algunos de los rasgos de un buen chico nunca se debe subestimar.
You want to be with a guy who knows the importance of little things… a guy who will always give his best to make your day (especially when you’re feeling off).
You want to be with a guy who will be kind to everyone around him regardless of their social status. That’s the kind of man who deserves our utmost respect and admiration, so don’t settle for anything less than that.
12. He pursues you like you’re the only girl in the world.
Chasing, pursuing, proving himself worthy of being with you… you can call it however you want, but one thing is sure: You should never give your heart on a plate to someone who hasn’t made the slightest effort to earn it. Punto.
Be with a man who PURSUES you. Such a man won’t make you feel like there’s something wrong with you just because you have some standards.
Le entusiasmará impresionarte con sus mensajes de texto y sus habilidades para las citas. Te perseguirá no por motivos turbios, sino porque realmente le importas.
Y, una vez que se gane tu corazón, seguirá manteniendo su juego de persecución. No te hará cuestionar su compromiso contigo, sino que te hará sentir protegida, valorada y querida.
Me llevó un tiempo poner en práctica este nuevo regla de fechado: Sólo confía en los chicos que te persiguen. Those who don’t bother chasing you will never know how to appreciate you.
So, it’s your task to let the guys know that you won’t tolerate anything in between. He either pursues you or he’s not worthy of being with you.
13. He’s reliable to the core
¿Qué buscas en un chico? Yo digo que hay que buscar un buen chico que sepa lo que quiere en la vida y que sea FIABLE.
Do you want to be with a guy who freaks out like a little child when something bad happens? Do you want to be with someone you can’t rely on when you need help with anything?
I’m aware of the fact that we women are strong and independent, but even we need to rely on someone when it gets hard.
Also, we need to know that the guy we’re with is trustworthy and not someone who will leave us once they realize la hierba es más verde al otro lado de la valla.
CONFIANZA, FIABILIDAD, COMPROMISO. Estas son las palabras clave que debe memorizar.
Finding such a man is really difficult nowadays because we’re greatly affected by the fake ideals of the modern lifestyle. A guy who values reliability is a guy worthy of your time.
14. He doesn’t try to change who you are
Too late… I’ve realized that you don’t have to follow a step-by-step guide to mantener el interés de un chico or change yourself completely to capture his attention. If you do, then you know you’re with the wrong guy. It’s as simple as that.
Un chico que realmente se preocupa por ti se asegurará de respetar tus gustos y no le gustaalaba tu peculiaridadesy valora tu personalidad única. He won’t be intimidated by any of the mentioned, and he definitely won’t try to change who you are.
So, look for the guy who will see the real you instead of trying to change you to his preferences… a guy who will know when you need a hug, when you’re feeling distressed, and when you need some time alone.
Don’t be with someone who judges you just because you don’t fit their definition of the perfect girlfriend. I repeat: perfection doesn’t exist. Be with a guy who appreciates your imperfection and always finds new ways to embrace it.
15. Admira tu fuerza y devoción
Don’t ever allow yourself to be with someone who downplays the strength and efforts you invest into ser una buena novia.
A great guy will admire your strength and make you even stronger instead of trying to manipulate you. That’s the kind of man you want to stick to.
You don’t want to be with someone who will give his best to make you feel less worthy only to manipulate you. El mundo está lleno de personas tóxicas que han perdido la capacidad de alabar las buenas cualidades de los demás.
Grateful men know how to value a woman’s selflessness, and they admire her strength and devotion to becoming the best version of herself.
Such a man encourages you and always lifts you up when you’re feeling down. He trusts in you, and he knows that you can achieve anything you set your mind to. Still, he lets you know that you can rely on him whenever you need to.
16. Asume la responsabilidad de sus actos
Irresponsible men have cost me lots of time and nerves so far. Here’s the newest example. Recently, I dated a guy who was the epitome of irresponsibility, but obviously, I was too blind to see it (on time).
On top of all his selfish actions, he even forgot about our date twice, after which, he ghosted me. A few days later, he apologized for it, and also made me feel like I should lower my “unreasonable expectations”.
¿En serio? ¿Desde cuándo asumir la responsabilidad de sus actos ¿y ser un ser humano digno de confianza se considera poco razonable?
That’s how, my ladies, you know you’re dealing with a man who is not good for you. Instead, choose to be with a man who takes responsibility for his actions in both love life and life in general.
Un hombre así hará todo lo posible por no decepcionarte, e incluso si lo hace, se disculpará a tiempo y se asegurará de no volver a repetir el mismo error. Un hombre así es el que se queda.
17. He’s attentive and supportive
In the age of smartphones and social media, it can be really hard (if not impossible) to get and hold someone’s attention.
However, if you have to teach him how to be attentive, that kind of guy is not worthy of your time, and he’s definitely not a candidate for a long-term relationship.
Quieres estar con un chico que ya conozca la importancia de una buena comunicación y un apoyo ilimitado.
Don’t ever beg for a guy’s attention or see it as something that should be earned. No, it shouldn’t. If you give your best to listen to him and support him through his life goals and other things, you have every right to expect the same thing in return.
La reciprocidad es algo que nunca pasará de moda. Men who are not worthy of your time will only be there when it’s convenient for them.
Do you know what? You don’t need such a man in your life because you deserve ten times better.
18. Un buen comunicador
La comunicación es uno de los aspectos más importantes de toda relación sana. Un buen comunicador da y recibe en una conversación.
No sólo se centran en sus propias palabras y pensamientos, sino que te escuchan activamente y responden en consecuencia.
One of the surefire ways to know that he’s a good communicator is if you can never run out of new temas para hablar con él. Tu lenguaje corporal y tus palabras se unen, haciendo que la conversación sea apasionada, significativa e inspiradora.
Un buen comunicador nunca te juzgará, manipulará o ignorará. Cuando surjan problemas en la relación, estará dispuesto a hablar contigo sobre ello en lugar de saltar al modo pasivo-agresivo.
And, one thing is sure… relationship issues will always be present, and you can’t exterminate them, but you can learn to deal with them in an effective and painless way. Estar con un buen comunicador lo hace posible.
19. He always finds time for you (because you’re his priority)
Here’s a universal truth that every lady deserves to know: Un tipo que te da por sentada no es digno de tu tiempo, nervios, palabras y acciones.
Imagine being with a guy who decides to simply ghost you from time to time, make excuses, and make you feel like you’re asking too much from him.
Ahora, imagina estar con un chico que siempre está ahí para ti, y que te hace sentir simplemente right. I won’t ask you which one you would choose because it’s evident.
With the right guy, you’ll never worry about where you stand, and he will never make you feel like you’re too much to deal with. Instead, he will always find time for you because he wants to. That’s the kind of guy you should be with.
20. Honestidad
Of course, being honest means that he’ll never do anything behind your back, and he’ll treat you the way you deserve. But, being honest also means having the courage to tell you things that might be painful for you to hear.
For example, if you’ve recently gained weight, the right man will express his concern for your health, and will help you with motivation and a training regimen.
Será sincero y atento con usted, independientemente de la situación, porque quiere lo mejor para usted. Por lo tanto, esté con un hombre que participe activamente en su vida en lugar de ser un observador pasivo.
You deserve to be with someone whose honesty will help you improve your lifestyle and make you a better person. A kind man deserves the same thing, and he’s completely aware of that.
21. Sigue las reglas de caballero
“Please” and “thank you” are the words you can find in his dictionary. He doesn’t feel the need to show off or boast about his successes.
Te respeta y te defiende. Sí, también te abre las puertas.
Te escucha con atención y sabe expresar sus sentimientos de forma honesta y caballerosa.
So, what do you look for in a guy? Look for a good man who follows gentleman rules. Look for a man who will treat you like I described above, and don’t settle for anything less.
22. Un alma romántica
I’m perfectly aware of the fact that most men have problems with expressing their romantic side, especially if they aren’t romantic souls by nature. However, we’re not looking for perfection, but a man who tries.
So, a man who tries will find a way to add romance to dating or to a relationship. He will not neglect the romance aspect just because he thinks he’s incapable of delivering it.
En cambio, hará todo lo posible por impresionarte con pensando en ti mensajescartas de amor y frases cursis de amor.
A man doesn’t have to be a hopeless romantic to make a woman feel loved. All he has to do is make an effort and his actions will match the level of his affection. Keep that one in mind when looking for the right guy.
23. Valora más el compromiso que su ego
Hacer que un hombre se comprometa has always been an art in itself. I’m sure every relationship expert would agree with me on this one.
So, you meet a nice guy and everything goes smooth until he turns into a legit commitment-phobe, which is every woman’s nightmare. Hay varias razones por qué huyen los hombres from commitment, and it’s often because of their ego.
Piensan que comprometerse con una mujer les atrapará y les hará parecer débiles a los ojos de otros hombres. Tonto, de hecho.
Un hombre de verdad valora más el compromiso que su ego. He doesn’t care about what other people will think of him because he knows he’s doing the right thing. That’s the kind of man you want to be with.
24. Comparten intereses y valores mutuos
Ni que decir tiene que la compatibilidad de valores es esencial cuando se trata de citas y relaciones potenciales. De hecho, valores fundamentales en una relación también debe coincidir.
Si vuestros intereses y valores son completamente diferentes, no podréis conectar ni entenderos. Sin conexión y comprensión, no hay relación.
When you meet a guy, make sure to talk about your goals, core values, and things that matter to you. If you’re compatible, then it will be easier for you to form a healthy and happy relationship.
25. Jugar no es lo suyo
Those men who like to play games certainly don’t care about your feelings or your mental health. Keep that one in mind as well when looking for the right guy.
La verdad es que buen chico que sigue las reglas de los caballeros expresará sus sentimientos desde el primer día en lugar de jugar contigo. No jugará con tu corazón, pero dará lo mejor de sí para ganarlo.
So, do yourself a favor and don’t waste your time on players who make you question things and your own sanity. You deserve a man who is emotionally stable and ready to fully commit to you without any complication.
¿Cuáles son las 5 cosas que más busca una mujer en un hombre?
Si tuviéramos que resumir todo lo dicho anteriormente, estas son las 5 cosas que deberías poner en tu lista de deseos cuando busques un hombre de verdad:
1. Reflexivo.
2. Madurez emocional.
3. Un buen comunicador.
4. Fiable.
5. Responsable.
Of course, this list is not fixed, and it can be modified to everyone’s standards and preferences, but these are the top qualities that shouldn’t be neglected. I’m sure you all agree with me, right?
Para terminar
What do you look for in a guy? Now, I don’t want you to think that the right guy for you should have ALL of the qualities above.
There are some essential qualities that you shouldn’t take for granted, such as honesty and responsibility, and there are some things that he can work on, such as his confidence and his romantic efforts.
Seguir ciegamente una lista de cosas que debe ser un hombre no te ayudará a encontrar Sr. Correcto porque elegimos a la gente con el corazón.
In the end, what matters is that he’s a good man who is willing to work on himself because effort always sounds promising.
When you find your man, here’s some advice on making your relationship last: 6 señales de una relación seria y 7 consejos para construirla. Buena suerte.
