Si quisieran, lo harían: ¿Verdadero o falso?

I’m sure you stumbled upon TikTok’s latest trend, “Si quisieran, lo harían.” While some women claim that this is the only piece of relationship advice we should all live by, some argue against it, reminding us that things aren’t always that simple.

So, what’s it gonna be? Is this line true or false? You can never know if you don’t read on!

Si quisieran, lo harían: 8 aspectos a tener en cuenta

He aquí algunos aspectos importantes que hay que tener en cuenta antes de llegar a una conclusión:

1. Nadie está tan ocupado

Let’s start with the most obvious reason why the “si quisieran, lo harían” line is true: everyone finds time and energy for the people and things that really matter to them.

Puede sonar duro, pero al fin y al cabo nadie está demasiado ocupado para llamarte, mandarte un mensaje o estar contigo cuando lo necesitas. Intenta ver las cosas desde tu propia perspectiva: siempre haces hueco en tu agenda a las personas que te importan.

If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse!

You can have the busiest day in the world, but you’ll find a way to at least send your loved one a text message or give them a phone call explaining yourself. You won’t ghost them despite being well aware that they need your presence.

On the other hand, if you’re too busy or exhausted, you’ll probably bail that man or woman from Tinder whom you’re supposed to go out on a first date with.

Do you see the difference? You aren’t busy for your family members or best friends, but you’re busy for someone you met on an online dating app.

And, that’s perfectly reasonable. But, it does bring us to the next conclusion: If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll encontrar una excusa!

2. La vida es demasiado corta para excusas

Sin embargo, lo último que piensas hacer es aceptar other people’s excuses. And, that’s perfectly fine.

Al fin y al cabo, la vida es demasiado corta para sentarse a esperar a que a alguien se le ocurra una excusa válida para no tratarte bien o alejándose. You’re sick and tired of people telling you how much you mean to them, but never actually showing up when you need them.

How many times have you heard your good friend telling you that they wanted to call you, but something didn’t go their way? What about your significant other who claims they love you to the moon and back, but regularly fails to give you the support you expect from them?

¿Qué haces cuando te encuentras con una situación así? ¿Deberías creer en estas excusas vacías?

Well, it all depends on your gut. Do you feel like they’re lying to you? If so, run!

3. You’re not equally important to everyone

Here’s a heartbreaking fact: sometimes, you’re not as important to people as you would like to be.

Let’s take this for an example. You met a really nice guy or girl and you’re doing your best to build a committed relationship with them. You know they like you, but they’re either clearly not putting enough effort in connecting with you or they’re making excusas para no comprometerse.

So, you say to yourself: If they wanted to, they would. But, why don’t they WANT a relación seria ¿Contigo?

Intentas justificar su comportamiento y sigues buscando excusas. Sin embargo, la cruda verdad es bastante simple: en el fin de la jornada, you’re el que más se preocupa.

And, as brutal as this might sound, it’s something you’ll have to accept. A lot of people won’t give you back the love you deserve. That’s all a part of life, and you just have to deal with it.

4. La vida a veces se interpone

I hate to break your bubble, but things aren’t always as simple as the TikTok advice “If they wanted to, they would” says. You know why? Well, because la vida es bastante impredecible.

A veces, las cosas se interponen en el camino. Cuántas veces has planeado ponerte en contacto con alguien, pero ha surgido un imprevisto?

Of course, I’m not talking about “a dog ate my homework” kind of thing. I’m talking about real life situations that sound like empty excuses, but are actually true.

What if the nice guy you met got hit by a car on the way to your first date? What if someone wasn’t returning your phone calls because they lost a loved one?

What if your friend or a family member hasn’t been texting you because they’re struggling with depression? What if your crush isn’t reaching out because they lost their phone and can’t get a hold of your number?

Confianza ilimitada frente a la sombra de una duda

Aquí tienes dos opciones. Puedes creerte estas excusas y arriesgarte a quedar como un tonto. O puedes acusar a la otra persona de no esforzarse lo suficiente antes de pedirle explicaciones.

What’s it going to be? Well, here’s something that saved my heart from getting broken too many times, and also helped me keep my mental health.

Conceda a las personas que le rodean la presunción de inocencia. Eso significa darles la oportunidad de explicarse.

However, if they repeat the same mistake and try to justify themselves with the same lousy excuse, they won’t be getting a segunda oportunidad.

5. Te quita la culpa de encima

Possibly the best thing about the “Si quisieran, lo harían” concept is the fact that it takes the blame off you. Instead of cuestionar su autoestima cada vez que un socio potencial doesn’t text you backSólo ten en cuenta que fue su decisión y que tienen derecho a tomarla.

En lugar de permitir que esto arruine su autoestimaRecuerda que nada de esto es tu culpa.

They didn’t fantasma porque of something you did. They weren’t unfaithful because you weren’t enough.

6. No es una invitación a perseguirlos con más ahínco

A relación sana means equal effort. It’s not about one person running for their life while the other one is chasing them all the time.

Por lo tanto, si alguien no está a su lado, considérelo una señal de alarma.

I don’t care if they’re no te devuelve los mensajes and phone calls, ignoring you all over social media, not giving you the amount of time you’re giving them, or ignoring you after y’all slept together.

La conclusión es la misma: esto no es una invitación para que los persigas con más ahínco. On the contrary, it’s a sign to back off.

As much as this hurts, this person clearly doesn’t want any more contact. Or, they’re just jugar a juegos.

En cualquier caso, lo último que debes hacer es correr tras ellos. Está claro que han tomado una decisión, y lo único que puedes hacer es respetarla y déjalos ir.

7. Lo que está destinado a ser tuyo encontrará un camino

The “If they wanted to, they would” concept doesn’t have to be looked at so pessimistically. Instead of searching for reasons why someone wasn’t there for you or chose not to treat you right, just see it as an act of destiny.

It’s actually pretty simple: they weren’t meant to be. O, al menos weren’t meant to last en tu vida.

Por otra parte, quien destinado a ser tuyo siempre encontrará tiempo y energía para ti. Tu alma gemela encontrará la manera a tu corazón.

There won’t be any obstacles or red flags. Once you meet them, everything will fall in its place, and you’ll understand why it never worked with anyone else.

Así que, por favor, en lugar de devanarte los sesos, relájate y deja que el Universo se ocupe de ti.

8. Some people don’t know how to “be there”

I don’t mean to justify anyone who doesn’t put enough effort into a relationship with you, but here is something you need to hear: a lot of people just don’t have the capacity to love you de la forma que usted espera.

Tal vez tengan una estilo de fijaciónson emocionalmente no disponibleo realmente don’t know what they want. Quizá el chico que te ha dejado plantada en realidad quería quedarse contigo, pero se arrepintió al ver que se estaba enamorando.

Maybe your friend wanted to give you their emotional support, but chickened out once they realized they had to be someone’s rock for the first time ever.

Don’t get me wrong: this doesn’t annul them from responsibility, and you shouldn’t feel guilty for not understanding their reasons!

To Wrap Up: Things aren’t always that simple

So, is the “If they wanted to, they would” sentence true? ¿Es el concepto que debe guiarte por la vida?

If someone doesn’t treat you right, is it because they simply don’t want to put more effort into your relationship? If someone isn’t there for you, is it because they don’t care enough?

Al fin y al cabo, tenga en cuenta que nada en la vida es blanco o negro. Sure, the “if there is a will, there is a way” concept applies in most cases, but sometimes you have to dig deep under the surface to find the real reason and to look at the bigger picture!