Once upon a time, there was a girl who felt like she could no longer fight.
Who felt like all the energy had drained out of her. She felt tired, sick, indifferent.
There was this boy. There’s ALWAYS a boy. He made her sink deep down into the abyss. The great, black hole swallowed her.
When she wanted to laugh, he made her cry.
When she wanted to sing, he made her stay silent.
When she was just about to dance, he stepped on her feet.
Nothing beautiful ever came from him. Inspiration, love, trust, romance – they were never a part of her life with him.
She could never trust him to do the right thing, to say the right words, to make a promise to her and keep it.
All she ever got was insensitive, harsh words and empty illusions of how her life would be in the future, her future with him. It made her sick to her stomach to think about it.
His egocentric, emotionless role in her life became so overwhelming, so powerful that it seemed like there was no way out from the toxic cycle she found herself in with him.
Nothing she ever did was good enough. He had opinions on everything she ever chose to do, every simple way she behaved.
She didn’t manage to see past the image he had created of her. But something changed. Something just clicked.
She knows her story. She knows how far she has come. She won’t let him dictate her life any longer.
She was looking for a person to change her life and once she realized the best place to look was in the mirror, everything started being so, so much better. That was step one.
Step two – was getting rid of the maniac who was ruining her life second by second, day by day, pulling her deeper into his web of controlling behavior.
There was no step three. Two simple steps to make her life bloom. He had put her through hell but now she was in heaven.
She knew she was enough. Smart enough, pretty enough, caring enough. She had never been enough for him.
She knew she needed a good man. She learned to stay away from the bad boys.
He was a bad boy who for a short time had seemed like a great choice.
She knew now that she deserved someone who was confident in his love for her.
Someone who wouldn’t test her, someone who wouldn’t give her a trial only position in their relationship.
She knew she needed someone to value her time instead of wasting it.
Someone who wasn’t too busy for her. A boy who missed her when she was gone – as simple as that.
She no longer wanted to be a backup plan. Her man had to be certain she was the one, not the second-best.
She wasn’t someone he’d settle for, she was his absolute best.
She deserved someone who’d fight for her, not someone who would throw in the towel like she was no longer an option.
Someone who cared. She wanted to find something special. She wanted to feel whole again.
She needed someone who would appreciate everything that she is. She only wanted to be herself.
She needed to feel trust. She needed not to worry that her boy would make her sick by doing something she could never forget.
She needed the calm of trusting someone completely. Once she had built herself back up from the ashes she realized what she was looking for.
She was looking for someone who was the complete opposite of him. Someone who wasn’t like him in any way, because everything he ever did was awful.
She was looking for love. Commitment. Healthy communication. And, let me tell you something – she sure found it.
Her soulmate was just around the corner, waiting for her, closer than she could have ever imagined.
If she had never had the strength to break off with her awful past he would have been waiting in vain.
She realized that life doesn’t get better by chance but by change. He sure put her through hell but now, now she was in heaven.
One thing was certain:
In no way could her glorious future have been predicted by her devastating past.