You are very well aware that forgiveness is a crucial part of letting go and moving on. With time, you’ve learned that it is the only way to true liberation and to freeing yourself completely.
And you keep forgiving the ones who have done you harm. You keep accepting the apologies you never got because you’re a kind and loving person who can’t stay resentful for long.
But what about you? Why don’t you treat yourself the same way? Why do you hold grudges against yourself? Why don’t you find the strength to forgive yourself?
Because that is exactly what you should do.
It’s time to forgive yourself for every time you allowed someone to break your heart. Because that was never your fault. You’ve always loved the best way you could and the ones who took advantage of your love are the only ones who should be ashamed of their actions.
For every time you settled for less than you deserve. Because now you know what you don’t want from life. Now you know that you are cut out for bigger things and for more valuable people.
Forgive yourself for letting the wrong people in and for not cutting them off on time. For giving them endless second chances and for justifying the ones who have done you harm. For not knowing better and for not learning from your past mistakes.
Forgive yourself for all the times when you begged for someone’s love and attention. For every time you allowed some asshole to make you wonder why you are not enough and for comparing yourself to all those other girls in your life.
For every time you chased some people. For all the sleepless nights you spent trying to decode some guy’s signals and trying to understand what he wanted from you. For not knowing that a real man will never make you pursue him.
Forgive yourself for all the times when you hoped that someone would change and become a better person. For not knowing that sometimes love isn’t enough to make someone change, until they decide to do it themselves.
For all the times when you tried to save the people who didn’t want to be saved. For trying to fix all those broken men and for not knowing that sometimes they aren’t emotionally unavailable—they are just assholes.
Forgive yourself for giving more than getting in return. For putting all of your efforts into relationships that were doomed to fail. For being the only one trying, without getting any appreciation, if nothing else. For being ready to move mountains for the people who never lifted a finger for your sake.
For every time you loved someone more than you loved yourself and for every time you didn’t prioritize yourself. For putting the needs of others in front of your own and for not being selfish when you should have been.
Stop blaming yourself for all the times you didn’t appreciate yourself and for all the times when you allowed others to treat you the way they wanted. For all the times you didn’t see that you matter and for all the times when you didn’t see your true worth.
Instead, be proud of the fact that you’ve always worn your heart on your sleeve. Be proud of always being the good guy and for never hurting anyone.
But most of all, be proud of yourself for always doing your best. For always trying and for always taking a chance, even when maybe you shouldn’t have.
Be proud of yourself for always being honest and true. For the fact that you were never scared to love or scared of putting yourself out there, without expecting anything in return.
Be proud of your strength and power. Be proud of the fact that you’ve survived every heartbreak and that you’ve always managed to get up when they tried to knock you down.
So, please, instead of blaming yourself, take everything that has happened to you as a valuable lesson and a worthy experience. See each of your scars as a reminder of the things you went through and as a reminder that you’ve always managed to rise and to pick up the pieces of your broken heart. Because trust me—not many can do that.
I am an English Language and Literature teacher. I am a writer. I am a daughter, a sister, a friend… But most of all, I am a woman, just like you.
A woman who has experienced the same things you’ve been going through. A woman who’s been fighting battles similar to yours. A woman who wants you to learn from her mistakes and who wants to help you empower yourself.