We all have a type. Whether we like to admit it or not, somehow we always gravitate towards the same type of men, every single time. Be that an ambitious hard-worker who doesn’t really have the time to nurture a loving relationship with you or be that a well-built guy who looks like he was made to break hearts with that gorgeous face and the body of a Greek god. And that’s exactly what always happens. He breaks your heart.
Did you ever start to wonder how come after every break-up you always end up disappointed in the entire male species, crying yourself to sleep, spending days eating Ben & Jerry’s and listening to Coldplay’s saddest songs? Could it be the fact that you are simply, unconsciously always choosing the guy who is just not right for you?
You’re probably going back in time now, and recollecting your past relationships and seeing a recurring pattern. You never realized this before, and you always thought that there was something wrong with you, but now, you are probably starting to realize that it’s really not you. It’s your unconscious desire to go after guys who make you feel so loved for a full whole minute and then break your heart as fast as they have won it.
Now is the time to realize you need to break that vicious pattern and realize why it was there in the first place. That way, you will be able to go for guys that are more suitable for you and won’t make you feel like you need to change anything about yourself—other than your choice of men.
Ask yourself why you go for the guys you go for? There is always a reason, whether it’s visible or not. Maybe it has something to do with how you see yourself, and you are projecting this on the guys you date? Maybe they resonate with you on some deeper level you are not even aware of, so you always gravitate toward them?
People normally go for things they feel familiar with and things they immediately feel they can handle. It makes us feels safe, and there is nothing wrong with that.
Could it be that you are looking for someone who is just like your dad, because he was the only male figure you had in your life who you looked up to? And in theory, it should work, but in practice, it’s much more problematic.
Whatever the case is, now that you are aware of that recurring pattern, it’s time to break it, and venture out and try to find someone completely different from what you would normally go for. You’ll never know if you don’t try! It can only be better, so give it a chance. Don’t fear the unknown, it may turn out to be just the thing for you.
Ask yourself what it is that you feel you deserve? One way or another, you talk to yourself, whether in your head, or out loud, and you are echoing the way your inner dialogue works with the way you choose your men. You go for those that seem familiar, those that work best with how you think, speak and feel.
Maybe you simply believe you only deserve a certain type of guy in your life, so you’re not letting yourself break out of that unhealthy circle in which you keep coming back to the same guy, just in a different form.
It’s time you start making changes in your dating life before you end up with the wrong guy in the long run. It’s time to stop letting these men make you feel insufficient and inadequate, simply because you are afraid of making a different choice!
Step out of your comfort zone and look further! The world is full of guys who could be your one. You just need to be brave enough to see them!