How do you be a better girlfriend? How do you make your boyfriend the happiest man in the world? How do you improve your relationship and make him realize he’s lucky for having you?
Deep down, every woman in the world wants to know the answers to these questions. Well, if you read on, that’s exactly what you’re about to get: a tutorial on becoming the girlfriend of every man’s dreams!
How to be a better girlfriend
Do all the things from this list and become the best girlfriend every guy could wish for!
1. Learn how to listen to him
If you want a lasting relationship, the first thing you have to work on is your communication skills. Start by listening to your partner.
But, I mean really actively listen to what he has to say. You’re not doing it because you’re waiting to reply, you’re doing it to hear him out.
Show him he has your full attention. No scrolling through social media, no watching the TV, and no background noise.
Men usually have a hard time expressing their feelings. If he sees that you couldn’t care less about what he’s telling you, he’ll shut down and he won’t try to talk to you ever again.
Most importantly: you don’t have to always give him a piece of your mind or a piece of advice. Sometimes, he just wants you to hear him out about the bad day he had without offering him solutions.
I know you’re just trying to help, but trust me, being quiet can mean much more to him.
2. Embrace his vulnerable side
Your boyfriend wants you to see him as this fearless, macho man who is everything but sensitive and emotional. But, guess what… a great girlfriend knows he’s also just a human being made out of flesh and blood.
I assure you he has a bunch of insecurities and a vulnerable side, as well – he’s just hiding it from the rest of the world. Well, it’s your job to inspire him to show them to you.
If you get a man to trust you, you can do everything else. Make him feel safe around you.
Prove to him that you would never make fun of his emotions. Let him know it’s okay to vent or even cry.
Embrace his insecurities and vulnerable side and cherish them. If you manage to get to this part of his personality, you’re pretty damn special!
Keep in mind that this is a big deal for him. He’s putting his ego aside, tearing down his walls, and letting you all the way in. Don’t take something like this for granted!
3. Instead of being a critic, become an encourager
How do you be a better girlfriend? Well, for starters, stop nagging all the time.
I know that this sounds like a cliche, and it may even offend you, but the truth is that your boyfriend sees your critiques as nagging. Yes, sometimes his actions bother you so much that you can’t help yourself.
But, hear me out on this one: you’re not his mother and it’s not your job to raise him or to nag him.
Trust me: he’ll realize his mistakes and change much faster without your pressure.
So, instead of being his biggest critique, become his number one fan. Show your man your endless support.
Encourage him to become a better person. Inspire him to improve, but don’t force him to change just to please you.
4. Impulsive actions lead to trouble
Impulsive behavior won’t allow you to have a successful relationship. In fact, it won’t bring you anywhere. So please, forget about it.
Sometimes, you’re too emotional and have a hard time controlling your actions. It happens to all of us.
However, it’s better to always think before you act and speak. Every time you’re about to start a fight, take a deep breath and ask yourself if it’s worth it.
Don’t get me wrong: I’m not telling you to keep your mouth shut just to be a good girlfriend. You should definitely speak up when something is bothering you. You should definitely call your boyfriend out on his actions when he’s not treating you right.
I’m just advising you to do it in a smart way. Instead of acting impulsively, think things through and find the best possible strategy which will give you the result you want.
If it’s necessary, sleep it off. Remember that the morning is wiser than the evening.
5. Don’t fight him; fight the problem
Here is a great tip for a healthy relationship: When you two argue, keep in mind that you shouldn’t be fighting each other. Instead, you should join forces and fight the problem as a team.
That’s exactly what you should do if you’re trying to figure out how to be a better girlfriend: fight the problem instead of fighting your boyfriend.
Even when he does something you’re not okay with, don’t hate him; hate his actions. This is the only way towards a successful relationship.
Fighting rules
Look, all couples fight. As much as you love him, there will be times when your boyfriend’s behavior will drive you nuts.
But, that doesn’t mean that you’re allowed to say or do whatever you want when that happens.
First of all, no insults or yelling are allowed. If he asks you to talk about the problem in the morning, respect his wishes.
Be clear about what’s bothering you, why it’s bothering you, and what he should do to fix it. Forget about immature mind games such as passive aggression, the silent treatment, or revenge. That’s now what mature women do!
6. Respect him even when you don’t agree
All of that leads to one of the most important pillars of a healthy relationship: respect! How do you be a good girlfriend? Never fail to respect your boyfriend!
Of course, he doesn’t deserve your respect if he’s not being a good boyfriend in the first place. However, if he gives you the place you deserve in his life, treat him accordingly.
Look, it’s perfectly fine that you don’t agree with some of the things he does in life. You might not even like some of his personality traits.
However, you have to learn to respect your differences. Respect his opinion, his individuality, and his freedom.
Here’s probably the most important thing about this aspect of your relationship: never show disrespect in front of others, especially in front of his best friends and family members.
Always have in mind that men have a very fragile ego. If you make fun of him or insult him in any way, especially when you’re not alone, you’ll just break his heart.
7. Clingy means emotionally unstable
I don’t care what he tells you: every man needs some alone time from his girlfriend. To be exact, every person in the world needs their personal space and time.
The worst thing you can do is limit his freedom. Being overly clingy and needy will make your boyfriend feel trapped in the relationship.
He’ll feel suffocated, and he’ll get the impulse to run. And, there is no going back from that point.
Don’t be possessive, and remember… he had a life before you came along. You can’t expect him to erase his entire existence just because you showed up.
It doesn’t mean he loves you any less just because he cares for his best friends and family. You should have your own lives outside of the relationship. After all, that’s what a good relationship is all about.
Jealousy: yay or nay?
We all get jealous from time to time. In fact, if your boyfriend sees that you’re scared of losing him, he’ll probably be flattered.
However, if you want to be a better partner, you have to reduce this jealousy to the bare minimum. Trust me: if he wants to be unfaithful, there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.
So, instead of racking your brains and torturing him, just give him his freedom and see what he’ll do with it.
8. Forget about trust issues
That brings us to my next point: the importance of having unlimited trust in your partner. I know that getting rid of deeply rooted trust issues is difficult, but if you don’t do something about it, they’ll ruin your love life for good.
You have to show him that you trust him – that means more than saying “I love you“. And, of course, you have to prove to him that you’re trustworthy as well.
You can’t build a long-term relationship with someone you’re doubting. Besides, if your trust issues aren’t based on something he did in the past, you’re insulting your BAE every time you show signs of doubt.
This man has to know that you’d trust him with your life if it were necessary. He has to know you don’t see him as a romantic partner only – he’s your best friend as well.
9. Be faithful even in small things
Being unfaithful is much more than actually sleeping with someone else. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying you should stop communicating with every male in your surroundings just to please your boyfriend.
However, if you’re wondering how to be a better girlfriend and keep him interested forever, you have to become faithful in everything, including in some seemingly little things.
To start with, there is no more flirting with other guys. It’s one thing to be nice, but if you want to be the best girlfriend ever, you’ll have eyes for your boyfriend only.
Delete all online dating apps. You’ve found the man of your life, and there is no need for you to look any further.
If you get a text message from a guy who’s hitting on you, tell him you’re taken, and that he has no business chatting with you in that way.
10. Don’t fall on the test of loyalty
Here’s another significant foundation of a healthy relationship: loyalty. If you’re wondering how to be a good girlfriend, you have to be loyal before anything else.
And, yes, in case you were wondering, being loyal is much more than being faithful.
First of all, this man has to know that he can count on you no matter what. Make sure he is aware that you’ll stick next to him through thick and thin, through good and bad days.
You have his back despite everything that happens. You won’t abandon him if times get rough, and you won’t turn your back on him when he needs you the most.
Instead, you’re the one who will give him CPR if he starts drowning… the one who will hold his hand through all the hardships life might bring you.
You’re in this together and you’re not going anywhere!
11. Actions speak louder than words
How do you be a better girlfriend? Well, to begin with, you must stand before your words. No matter how much he hears “I love you“, he’ll never believe you unless you prove your emotions.
Don’t make false promises just to get under his skin. Don’t love bomb him and pretend like you care for him, and then act like you don’t give a damn about your relationship.
Show this man that you’re a mature woman who sticks to her words.
Of course, this all depends on his love language. There are guys who will feel loved if you make them their favorite meal while others prefer getting a bunch of text messages all the time.
Just pay attention to what makes your man feel the most loved! He’ll be impressed once he sees you’re putting in an effort!
12. …but words matter as well
However, this doesn’t mean that you should never say “I love you“. Even though actions always speak louder than words, it doesn’t mean you should never talk nicely to your partner.
He’ll probably never say it, but he loves it when you call him by a cute nickname. He enjoys you telling him how much he means to you.
He’ll never admit it, but he’d love to get a love letter or even a poem from you. Trust me: he keeps all of your romantic love cards hidden.
Shower him with compliments
And, let’s not forget about compliments! No, they’re not reserved for women only. Men love getting them as well.
So, don’t forget to compliment your boyfriend. Tell him that his workouts at the gym are giving amazing results, that he smells great, that his smile still awakens the butterflies in your tummy, or that he’s a catch!
Most importantly: praise his skills and achievements. Tell him he’s the smartest guy you’ve ever met, or just mention that you’re impressed with his physical strength.
13. Become friends with his friends
Here’s a simple way to become a good girlfriend: become friends with your significant other’s loved ones.
This man wants to include you in his life. He’ll never specifically ask you to love his friends and family, but trust me… there is nothing he would appreciate more.
Look, I get it if they’re not your cup of tea. But, even in that case, you have to respect them and be polite at all times.
However, the moment your boyfriend sees that the people he cares for have accepted you, your romantic relationship will instantly improve.
No, he doesn’t need their permission to love you. He’ll just be happy for the fact that all the people who are important to him get along great!
14. Love his imperfections
Here’s a piece of relationship advice: never try changing your man. You’ll probably fail, but even if you don’t, you’ll just turn him into a bitter man who hates himself.
I have to warn you: this man isn’t perfect. But, neither are you.
So, instead of expecting a Prince Charming, embrace his imperfections. Fall in love with his flaws because they’re also a part of his personality.
Show him that he can be his true self in front of you – that’s what true love is all about.
15. Trigger his hero instinct
How do you be a better girlfriend? To begin with, let your boyfriend be the man.
Don’t get me wrong: this doesn’t mean you two aren’t equals in this romantic relationship. However, sometimes he needs to know he’s still the one wearing the pants around here.
A simple way to do this is to trigger his hero instinct. Let him help you, and if needed, even pretend that you don’t know how or can’t do something without his help.
Give him a chance to take care of you. Let him be your hero, and from time to time, pretend to be the damsel in distress.
16. He needs to be loved physically
How do you be a better girlfriend? Well, you most certainly don’t have to sleep with your boyfriend whenever he’s in the mood, even if you’re not up to it.
Nevertheless, physical affection surely is one of the ways towards his heart. Hug him, hold his hand, kiss him without any special reason, and don’t forget to cuddle. This will make him feel loved more than anything.
17. Honesty is always the best policy
Whatever happens, don’t lie to your boyfriend. If he catches you lying, you’ll lose his trust and your entire relationship will go downhill.
As a good girlfriend, you have to be honest, even if you know he probably won’t like the truth. That’s the only way towards your man’s respect.
No matter what it is, you two will always find the solution to the problem if all the cards are on the table.
Keep in mind that this man got emotionally naked in front of you. He exposed himself, and the least he deserves is your complete honesty.
18. Take care of his well-being
You know how I told you to let your man take care of your well-being? Well, it goes both ways.
It’s all about the little things that mean a lot. Do some cute things for him; cook him his favorite meal, ask him if he has had a hard day at work, give him a sensual massage, tell him to send you a text message when he gets home, take care of him when he’s sick…
Each one of these things says “I love you” more than actually pronouncing these three words. If you take care of your man properly, he’ll see you as wifey material.
Not only that: you’ll also provide him with a sense of stability and security. More than anything, that will help you win his heart!
19. Remember: he’s not a mind reader
Here’s some relationship advice: your significant other can’t read your mind. He can’t fulfill your wishes if you’ve never stated them out loud.
He can’t know that you’re angry, and he most certainly can’t make up for something he did wrong if you were never clear about what was bothering you.
He can’t get you the perfect birthday gift if you have never talked about the things you like. He can’t know that you’re upset if you keep telling him everything is perfectly fine.
I guess you see where I’m going. Instead of expecting him to be a mind reader, please speak your mind. It will make your love life much easier, and most importantly, better.
20. Be the best version of yourself
Finally, you can’t become a better girlfriend unless you become a better person. Building a loving relationship with your partner will be much easier if you have a loving relationship with yourself.
While you’re trying to please him, don’t forget to do your own thing, focus on yourself, and live your own life. Self-love is mandatory!
What makes a girl a good girlfriend?
A good girlfriend is loving, caring, faithful, honest, trustworthy, and attentive. She takes care of her boyfriend’s needs, doesn’t play mind games, and shows him affection.
This girl has incredible communication skills, understands her partner, and gives him her endless support. She doesn’t try to change him, but she does inspire him to become better.
What are the 5 most important things in a relationship?
Love, respect, loyalty, communication, and trust are the 5 most important things for a loving relationship. Of course, there are multiple other things that a couple has to share in order to have a good relationship, but these are definitely the most significant pillars.
How do I stop being a difficult girlfriend?
For starters, don’t nag about every little thing. Instead of being a drama queen, work on your communication skills. Reduce your passive aggression to the minimum, and be open about your desires.
Don’t try changing your man, and don’t be overly needy. Once you achieve all of these things, nobody can accuse you of being a difficult girlfriend!
To Wrap Up:
Now that you’ve learned how to be a good girlfriend, make sure to put this knowledge to good use. Don’t do all of these things for a man who doesn’t deserve you.
On the other hand, if you see that your boyfriend is worthy of your effort, give him the best possible version of yourself!