Lately, you’ve been feeling like you’re losing a grasp on life.
Your whole life, you spent so much time focusing on those around you, like your family and loved ones, and now you’ve finally started realizing that in the meantime, you lost all sense of your own life.
What’s the point in trying so hard for everyone else if at the end of it all, it messes with your mental health?
When will you start feeling like there’s a point to everything and that all of your hard work will finally pay off?
There’s got to be another human being in this world who feels the way you do. There’s got to be somebody who is experiencing the same tiredness and a lack of will to live the way you are.
You can’t possibly be alone in feeling this way, right? And let me tell you something—you’re not.
I’m about to share with you my own personal experience with feeling exactly the way you are right now and show you how I found my way back despite all the odds and fought for myself harder than I ever did before.
It wasn’t easy and it didn’t happen overnight but it sure did play a key role in me getting my life back.
Why Do We Get Tired Of Everything?
The first time I started realizing I was losing my mind was a few years back when I was transitioning from student life in one city to a whole new chapter in a new city where I was left to my own devices to fend for myself.
I was alone and felt like I had nobody in my corner anymore. Life stopped making any sense and it felt as if all of my loved ones had given up on me.
I kept telling myself that I needed to stay strong because if I didn’t do it for myself, I was never going to feel better. I needed to be my own hero. And it sucked.
There was heartbreak on every corner. There were parts of life I couldn’t share with anyone (not even my long-distance best friends) because they would all have thought I was going bananas.
Social media imposes those unattainable standards for young people and that only prolonged my panic attacks and fears of not being normal.
Was I fighting a mental illness that nobody was willing to talk about? Is it a bad thing that I contemplated suicide because life sucks? I honestly didn’t know what to think.
I was just SO sick and tired of everything and I needed the world to stop spinning in order to get my shit together.
I felt as if the ground I was walking on was crumbling beneath my feet. The world made no sense and everything was so gray.
I became jaded, anxious and distant from everyone and who used to be a fun, outgoing girl was now a shadow of my former self.
How could I help others in any way if I couldn’t even help myself get out of bed?
And that’s when it hit me. I was all alone in a new city.
I was faced with a new beginning and a new life and being away from everyone I loved made me feel as if I was a little child who had gotten in way over her head.
And if I was ever going to get out of my rut, I needed to make careful choices with the right people and do it my own way.
And that’s how my journey toward a healthier, happier relationship with myself began.
How To Get Back On Your Feet?
I started reaching out to those I held closest without fears or reservations. I started sharing my pain and voicing my concerns and it totally lifted such a heavy burden off my shoulders.
Yes, it was okay that I was feeling that way. Yes, I was perfectly ‘’normal’ for experiencing borderline suicidal thoughts. And do you know why? Because millions of people around the world feel this way too.
Just because you don’t hear about it or read about it, doesn’t mean it’s not real! And that’s where the healing started for me and hopefully, the same will go for you.
Reaching out to people who get you is key. Admitting to yourself that you have a problem is crucial. Everyone experiences a part of life they are ashamed of. But do you know how they get by?
With a little help from their family and friends.
By sharing your pain, you are being brave enough to be vulnerable and genuine with those who will take care of your heart as if it was their own.
Ever since I started implementing small changes into my daily life and paving my own roads that worked for ME, I’ve thrived more than ever before.
Ever since I started finding a reason to get up each morning, I started finding it easier to get through the day.
And that’s the secret. Finding those little daily motivations that will keep you going and having the right people around you who will never let you give up on yourself.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Be kind to your heart and listen to what your head is telling you.
If you’re tired of everything, there’s a hidden reason you’re feeling this way and you’re the only one who can get to the bottom of it.
When the world is painted in dark colors and everything loses its sense, that’s your mind telling you that you need to take a break. Stop what you’re doing and nurture yourself.
Trust the vibes you’re feeling and listen to your head.
There’s a reason for everything and I promise you will find it but first you need to slow down and LISTEN.
Here are 6 tips and tricks that helped me find new energy when the world drained me and that helped me to find a new perspective that has since opened my eyes and helped me find that long-lost girl I once loved being.
Choose to pave your own path with the help of these extremely useful tips and it’s only a matter of time before you’ve found your purpose in life again!
1. Stop comparing and start appreciating
The first thing people tend to do when they’re unhappy with themselves is immediately start comparing their life with that of others.
And that’s the number one mistake you should avoid at all costs and here’s why.
Nobody has it all figured out. EVERYBODY is fighting silent battles that the rest of the world knows nothing about.
If you see your neighbor living a seemingly perfect life, just know that you have no idea what goes on behind closed doors.
You have no idea what her private life is like.
What if she’s in a traumatic marriage and has an abusive partner? What if she’s sick and tired of not being appreciated by her peers? And you would never know this to be the case because people put on a happy face when they’re in public.
It’s just easier that way. Just like you’re tired of everything and everyone, the same goes for so many people in your life and you wouldn’t even guess.
So let go of your need to compare and instead, stop and appreciate all the little ways in which your life is actually on point.
- Appreciate your colleague from your new job being so helpful on your way to finding everything you need.
- Appreciate the way your neighbor offers to take your dog for a walk when you’re having a long day at work.
- Appreciate your friends calling to check up on you and having a solid support system.
- Appreciate the way you actually have a job and are able to pay rent, unlike so many people in this world who struggle each and every day.
2. Avoid people who drain you and keep close to those who feed your soul
You’d be surprised how much those you surround yourself with affect your energy levels.
Each moment you spend with a person who drains you of your energy is a step closer to a negative mindset.
Those you spend most of your time with end up being those who shape you as a person. Think about this for a second.
Who do you spend most of your time with? What are they like as people? Do you feel exhausted and drained while you’re with those people or do they make you want to be a better version of yourself?
This is really important. If these people aren’t those who lift you up and encourage you to be your best you, then they’re not right for you.
Who is someone you simply enjoy being around? Who do you see and immediately feel your heart beating faster?
Because THAT is someone who will help you on your way up when you’re feeling down.
It can be your one true love or it can be your best friend. But when you find that person, stick by them and seek their company when your world starts getting gray. Their company will get you out of your blues.
Their way of getting you the way nobody else does will put a genuine smile on your face.
When life sucks, those who make you happy will be the only people with the power to make a change.
It all starts with you and ends with those you keep close to you. Help them help YOU.
3. Find a new motivation to start each day
This is my own personal favorite. This is how it works: Each and every day, think long and hard about what you wish to accomplish the next day. Set a small yet meaningful goal and let it be the reason you get up tomorrow.
It can be whatever you want! Maybe it’s work-oriented? Maybe it’s family-related? Whichever one makes you want to get up is the right one for you.
For me, it was a few things. For a while, it was a work-related thing that I decided I needed to accomplish before I called it a day and I didn’t let myself stop until it was done.
It felt empowering and it made me feel capable, perseverent and ambitious.
I ended each day feeling a sense of accomplishment and getting home felt well-deserved and I recommend this method to anyone!
The other thing I tried was a friend thing.
Every day for that week, I would have to contact a close friend I hadn’t spoken to for a bit and have a conversation with them. I’d call them and simply be there for them in whichever way they needed me to be.
It would feed my soul the way barely anything else does. Catching up with someone I love deeply always has a profound effect on me.
The conversation would be heart-nurturing for the both of us and it gave me a reason to get up each day.
Knowing I was going to speak to a close friend would give me the motivation to get work done efficiently because I knew I had something nice to look forward to when I got home.
See also: “Why Am I Not Good At Anything?” You Are, And Here’s Why
4. Think about where you once were and how far you’ve come
This one will make you see that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. For me, it was a game-changer.
I felt sorry for myself for so long. I always believed things were so messed up for me and I pitied myself every day. How do I always get the short end of the stick? Why do bad things always happen to ME?
And that’s what made me think. Things used to be SO much worse. I was in such a bad place once upon a time and I wouldn’t dream of ever going through that again.
And where I am now is beyond what I could’ve dreamed of accomplishing then. And doesn’t that make you really see things for how they truly are?
I used to barely be able to pay my rent and now I don’t struggle financially.
I used to have so many fake friends and now I have a small circle of fantastic, loyal people whom I deeply enjoy spending time with.
My family and I have the best relationship now, especially compared to where we were a mere few years ago.
And that’s what made me think, ”Oh, okay. I see it now. Things really have improved, I just had to open my eyes and see it all.”
Try doing just that. I promise you’ll be so impressed with your journey through life that you’ll immediately form such a healthier outlook on yourself and the world around you.
5. Get into a rhythm that works for you and don’t let up
Create a structure for your life. Don’t let a day go to waste. Start your days right and don’t waste any precious moment, especially since you never know what tomorrow might bring.
Get up in time to get to work and stop by to get your coffee order from Starbucks.
At work, do your best to be your most effective, productive self and try to keep a smile as much as you can (it subconsciously improves your mood!).
Be kind to your co-workers and eat lunch with them while chatting about your weekend plans and laughing at funny memes.
Once you’re finished at work, go home, rest for a bit and then go get something to eat with a close friend or family member during which you’ll fill up your energy levels and feel the warmth and happiness of a loved one.
Watch a few episodes of your favorite TV show and chat with your best friend on the phone.
If it’s Friday, make plans with your crew and dance the night away.
This structure will help you keep your chin up and live your life fully and happily.
You’ll always have something to do, which will leave little to no time for sad thoughts! And voila—you’ll be regaining your old self without breaking a sweat!
6. Let yourself find true love and NEVER settle for a mediocre one
Your love life affects so much of the rest of your other that you can’t afford to ever settle for someone who doesn’t make you happy to be alive.
If your current partner doesn’t make you happy, then what are you still doing with them?
If you’re sad and miserable more than you’re happy and energetic, you’re with the wrong person.
Find somebody who will put a smile on your face the moment you lock eyes with them. Find someone whose happiness will be your happiness and vice versa.
When your partner is your best friend, it’s hard to stay sad for long periods of time. They simply have their way with you that nobody else can quite get.
And until you’ve found just that, rather stay single than settle for someone who makes you feel like you’re settling.
Life will suck SO much less when you start spending it with someone whose heart goes perfectly with yours.
And once you find this person, trust me, you’ll feel it in every fiber of your being.
The world is not all that bad. You simply haven’t found the right person to help you see the light when your world becomes dark.
So, don’t ever think there’s something wrong with you because when you meet the right person, all of the pieces will finally click together and you’ll see that it DOES get better.
When you get tired of everything, giving up is the easy choice.
Laying your head on your pillow and playing Coldplay is so easy and convenient to do. But do you know what’s way harder? Life.
Dealing with all of its problems with your head held high.
Reaching out to your sister when everything is telling you to pull away. Facing your demons and showing them they can’t get the better of you.
In this article, I hope you’ve realized that there IS a way out and that it starts with you.
You’re the one who needs to choose to want to get better. You’re the one who needs to decide you’ll find your way back. From then on, things will start picking up.
Weed out the toxic people from your life. Pick up the phone and call your long-distance best friend. Dump the person who doesn’t make your heart sing.
Be your own hero. Fight your own battles and don’t be afraid to ask for help when you stumble.
Life gets hard for everyone and you’re never alone in feeling lost.
That’s why you have your family, friends and loved ones. Those are the people who will help you find yourself when you lose perspective.
Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength, determination and willpower.
And hats off to you for choosing to fight for yourself along the way.
Life throws us all a curveball every now and again but only the bravest choose to find the light on the darkest of days.