Closure is important. Extremely important. You can’t proceed in your life without getting closure on your past relationship, because it will drag out into every relationship that comes afterward.
Also, the emotional flashbacks you’ll continue getting aren’t going to serve anyone, especially not you.
Those emotions will break you and you’ll want to get back with your ex even though you know that it’s the worst thing that can happen to you.
Because of all these reasons, getting closure is crucial for your future.
But how do you do that?
How do you simply get closure on someone who meant the world to you? You were convinced that you were going to stay together for the rest of your lives, so what’s happening now isn’t what you planned and it’s breaking you apart. Don’t fear, I’m here to help you.
1. Get rid of the things that remind you of him
Throw it all away into the trash! Well, not really into the trash but if you got a lot of toys from him, like teddy bears, etc., you can donate them to people who are less fortunate than you.
Throw away those photos even though it hurts like hell, but do it. Do it all so you can finally move on in life. You don’t need those mugs and you don’t need to hold on to his hoodies.
2. No contact
We’ve all been there; even if we break up with someone, we tend to continue talking to them because it’s hard to tell them goodbye for good.
But cutting off contact between you two helps you to stop thinking about him. In the beginning, it’ll seem like there’s no way you will ever be able to not text him back but believe me, it’s going to be worth it.
I would go as far as to tell you to delete his number and block him on all social media that exists, just so he can’t get back to you. You’re better off without him anyways.
3. Set boundaries
It’s very important to set clear boundaries when you break up with someone. If you find yourself at the same party as him, don’t just go up to him to talk but rather ignore him completely.
If he comes up to you, you can politely answer his questions without showing any kind of interest in his life. Y
ou need to make a good impression so he’s able to see what he’s lost but also to keep your own distance from him.
He doesn’t deserve to hear your voice again, so don’t even bother talking to him.
4. Write him a letter
Wait, before you start thinking that I’m crazy, let me tell you that you don’t need to send him this letter. It’s all about making a little letting go ritual.
Write down all the things that upset you and all the memories that you would like to let go of. Write down everything.
When you’re done with it, you can either burn it or seal it in an envelope and read it once again when you think that the time is right.
5. Express your emotions through art or exercise
I don’t know whether you’re an artsy person or not but art can help you a lot.
It’s sadness that makes an artist and not the other way around and you now have all this time on your hands to dedicate to starting a new hobby.
Also, if you’re not interested in art, you can go to the gym! Hitting a punching bag is a really good release for negative emotions. Go for it!
6. Have a self-care routine
Maybe every morning or every night, or at least once a week, give yourself time for self-care.
It doesn’t have to be a long routine but just enough to make you feel refreshed and in love with yourself.
Take a bubble bath. Take a walk outside. Put on a face mask and read a book. It’s all about you now.
7. Talk about it
Find some friends or family members who can help you cope with this situation that you’re in.
Even if it means talking about him for hours, you’ll feel refreshed after it. Even if it means that you’re going to cry, don’t hold back.
Don’t hold it all inside you because otherwise you are going to explode at one point or another.
You can also find professional help from a therapist if needed, as they can help you enormously.
8. Focus on the future
Your past is in the past. You can’t change it, as much as you want to, and this is the right time to start anew.
Make new plans and make sure to follow them through. Focus on all those goals you want to achieve and don’t look back.
You’re becoming a better version of yourself each day. Focus on that.
There will come someone into your life who will love you and be there for you and treat you right.
9. Forgive your ex and yourself
I’m not crazy. You just can’t really move on until you realize that forgiveness is necessary.
You need to forgive your own mistakes, realize that you have become smarter and better. Your partner’s mistakes are also in the past and you’re not responsible for his actions.
Be aware that you have to let go of your relationship for good because you simply weren’t meant to be with one another.
10. Go on a vacation
Going to another town or city for a vacation means leaving the place where you were going out with your ex and it means escaping until you are fully recovered and healed.
Go on and give yourself this luxury, because you can. Because you deserve it.