Emotional vampires are all around us but sometimes it is quite hard to notice them. They can easily pretend that they are someone different and in that way, lead you on to get the things they want. There are a couple of different emotional vampires all along with narcissists, those who play the victim, controllers or the ones with split personalities.
But no matter which one it is that you know, you need to learn how to protect yourself from everything that they are capable of. Here are some of the most common things that you can do for yourself in order to get away from their claws. So read carefully because these tips can save you from tears.
1. Have high self-esteem
When emotional vampires see that someone is quite weak, they will try to make their life miserable. If you tend to be a quiet and shy person who doesn’t talk too much and doesn’t have opinions about things, it is quite possible that this kind of an abuser will try to abuse you. So, whatever you do, keep your self-esteem high. Show him that you are good on your own and that you don’t need others to be happy. If you don’t feel it, it is okay, you just need something that will make them stay away, so pretend as much as you can.
2. Set your rules
The most important thing when you are dealing with people like this is that you make your own rules and set your own limits. Don’t let someone make a fool out of you and don’t let them treat you like shit. You need to put yourself first and if you do that, you will be protected from emotional and toxic vampires. They won’t drain your positive energy because you won’t let them do it. Once you set the rules, everybody who wants to be close to you will have to respect them. It’s as simple as that!
3. Don’t let them control you
When you let an emotional vampire control you once, you won’t be able to get away from his claws. So, whatever you do, don’t believe everything they say and don’t let them convince you of the things that you don’t want to believe. Also, don’t let them see that you are assertive but always be polite and tell them that you value their opinion but that you have your own as well. That will show them that you have the right attitude and that you are not so easy to handle. In this way, you can protect yourself from their negative energy because they will definitely do anything in their power to have things their own way.
4. Whatever happens, stay cool, calm and collected
Every emotional vampire would love to irritate you but if you show them that you can be calm to everything that they say, they will realize that you are hard to handle and they won’t abuse you. The catch with them is that they attack when they see that you are afraid but if you show them that you are stronger than that, they will just leave. When they see that you are being calm no matter what they say, they will try to tease you and make you feel uncomfortable. If that happens, just leave them and go back once they get back to normal. There is no need to fight with someone who would never say that they are wrong.
5. Say ‘No’
The catch is that an emotional vampire will take advantage of you if they see that they can do it. They will ask you to do big things for them and they will never be there for you. That is one of the ways they take your positive energy and leave you drained. That’s why you need to learn to say ‘No’. Whatever you do, don’t say ‘Yes’ to them if that will mean saying ‘No’ to yourself. You need to set some rules and stick to them if you want to protect yourself from people like that. You should especially be wary of emotional vampires in love relationships because it is much easier for them to get what they want because you already love them.
6. Smile at them
The worst thing that you can do in their presence is smile, so that’s exactly what you should do. They won’t be able to stand that they didn’t transfer any negative energy to you and that their ‘spells’ don’t work on you. That will make them feel bad and they will try to find other ways to make you feel bad since they didn’t have any success the first time. So, whenever you see them, smile. Smile even if you don’t feel like smiling, just to make sure they stay away from you. I am sure that they won’t bother you with their presence because they already know that you are not one of those people they can take advantage of.
7. Stay away from them
The best thing that you can do for yourself is to stay away from people like this. No matter whether that person is your family member or your friend, you need to know that you can’t form a stable and healthy relationship with someone who can’t at least take the control of their own life. Don’t feel bad for letting someone go. If they wanted to stay in your life they would have done anything to earn their place there. Know that you are not guilty because your friendship or relationship falls apart or because you are not as close as you were before. That is just a defense mechanism and if you don’t defend yourself, nobody else will.