¿Debo bloquear a mi ex? Estas 10 conclusiones te ayudarán a decidirte

Debería Bloqueo a mi ex en las redes sociales? ¿Debo bloquear también su número? I can’t tell you how many times these annoying, pesky questions have rummaged through my mind después de la ruptura. En efecto, aprender cómo superar una relación no es tarea fácil.

And I can bet that I’m not the only one. We’ve all been through pretty much the same dilemmas when it comes to people who were such a huge part of our lives.

¿Es un movimiento desesperado? ¿Y si luego me arrepiento? ¿Le demostrará que Todavía me importa?

Pensándolo bien, ¿es esto lo mejor que puedo hacer por mi salud mental y mi futura vida amorosa? ¿Me traerá la tan deseada paz interior?

I bet these are all the questions going through your head. You’re putting the pros and the cons on a scale but you can’t seem to come up with the answer.

Well, you’ve come to the right person because I’m about to give you all the answers you need- or at least, I’ll help you get to them.

Here, I’m going to discuss what you should consider and ask yourself before blocking your ex and explain how your decision could be perceived by your ex-novio.

¿Por qué debería hacerlo?

Hay múltiples razones a favor de bloquear a tu ex, pero una las supera a todas: si juegas bien tus cartas, este puede ser tu billete a un viaje de curación saludable. It’s not an easy decision but it definitely is the one that will help you move on with your life.

As long as you’re following all of your ex’s social network accounts and, even worse- expecting him to call or text you- you cannot make any significant progress.

Remember: if he’s a hombre tóxico, he will probably never leave you alone- at least, not for good. As long as he has access to you, he’ll be using his privileges.

By not blocking him, you’re indirectly showing him that you’re perfectly okay with him marching in and out of your life.

You’re showing him that you don’t mind his presence.

RELACIONADO: Me ha bloqueado: Qué significa y qué hacer al respecto

Ojos que no ven, corazón que no siente

En un ex novio (o ex novia) so virtually close at any given moment creates an uneasy and anxiety-ridden environment in which it’s difficult to thrive.

How does one handle being one click away from their ex’s life while expected to not sneak a peek?

¿Cómo se puede sobrevivir al desamor y superar el proceso de curación sabiendo al mismo tiempo que están desesperados por ver qué hace su ex y estando tan cerca de averiguarlo?

Entiendo. Querer un ex vuelta es algo completamente natural.

You’ve spent such a huge chunk of life together and now he’s just cut out from your life as if he never made a dent in it.

Pero tener a un ex en tus redes sociales es una situación delicada y, a veces, bloquearlo es la mejor solución.

But how do you know for sure? You’ve got so much history together.

You’ve gone through monumental changes with each other and he was the one by your side when you were scared of reaching out to anyone else.

And now, he’s just gone. The thought of not being with him is almost as gut-churning as seeing him happy on his cuentas en redes sociales.

What if you see him with another girl? You couldn’t possibly handle it.

But at the same time, is not knowing what he’s up to even worse? Right now, this seems like a real nightmare.

The man who used to be your rock is now but a distant memory you’re desperately trying to rid yourself of.

Only you’re not sure if you should go through with it because the repercussions might be more than you can handle…

Demostrar un punto

Another argument on the blocking side is showing this guy that you’re serious about not getting back together with him.

You’re perfectly fine with the two of you breaking up. You can’t stand looking at him, let alone hearing from him. You see your past relationship as a chapter that has reached its end.

In fact, it’s even possible that you already have a new partner. So, you want your ex out of your life and out of your phone.

Let’s get one thing straight: putting the last nail in his coffin shouldn’t be your primary motive for blocking him. If you’re doing it, you’re doing it because of yourself.

Nevertheless, why wouldn’t you see this as some extra bonus? You finally threw him out of your life and additionally, he is very well aware that puedes vivir sin ellos.

Basically, it’s a win-win situation.

Why You Shouldn’t Do It?

Let me tell you this- the worst thing you can do is be indecisive. You know exactly what I’m talking about- about blocking and unblocking this guy all the time.

That way, you’re making yourself a fool. You’re showing him that you know that getting a second chance is the worst idea ever (that’s when you block him) but you miss him too much to really go cold turkey (that’s when you unblock him).

This type of behavior makes you look immature. It’s a clear indicator that you’re struggling with the breakup and that you’re not strong enough to really cut your ex off.

So if you think this is what you’ll be doing after you block him for the first time, don’t! It’s better to keep on giving him full access than doing things halfway.

Una vez tomada esta enorme decisión, debe ser definitiva y no hay vuelta atrás.

Decisión final

Before I give you the answer to the question “Should I block my ex”, let me tell you that always carries a certain weight and it’s not something to do while angry or overly emotional. Just try to imagine how would you feel si tu ex te bloquea…

Quiero que seas consciente del efecto que este movimiento puede tener en él, en ti mismo y en tu propio crecimiento personal.

Haciendo clic en dejar de seguir es tan fácil, pero despertarse al día siguiente y no ver sus historias de Instagram y darse cuenta de que unfriending él afectará a su vida de una manera grande es un juego de pelota totalmente diferente.

If you think that blocking your ex on social media might be a bad idea and you’re having second thoughts, I’m here to offer some reasonable reasoning behind your actions to make the process easier.

If you think there might come a time when you’ll want recuperar a tu ex, it’s all the more reason to educate yourself on all the possible scenarios and not rush this decision.

Reacting out of anger, fear or frustration is the best way to make a wrong decision that’s only going to make you feel good for about two seconds.

And after that, you’ll feel overwhelming sensations of regret, anger, and dissatisfaction with your decision that will haunt you for a long time.

Una vez bloqueé a mi marido (hace mucho, mucho tiempo) cuando habíamos roto temporalmente y estaba con un nuevo socio.

Durante ese período de tiempo, mis ojos se abrieron realmente a algunas verdades más grandes, y aquí están algunas cosas útiles que me di cuenta que me ayudaron a seguir adelante y encontrar mi cierre.

Véase también: Cómo vivir en paz y armonía con la ayuda de estos 5 pasos

Through His Perspective…

Before getting to the part which will help you evaluate whether or not you should block your ex, here’s where we’ll start.

Quiero le guiará a través de su cabeza and his thought process upon seeing he’s been blocked.

You obviously know what you’re doing and why you’re doing it (or you’re minutes away from finding out below) but he doesn’t.

He’ll see this act as something that it probably isn’t and will therefore arrive at certain conclusions which will make it improbable recuperar a tu ex.

¿Te has preparado para las posibles consecuencias? ¿Tienes la menor idea de lo que puede ocurrir si bloqueas a tu ex?

Here are some of the things he’s likely to think after having been blocked.

Podría hacerte parecer amargado y resentido

Your ex doesn’t have firsthand knowledge of what’s happening inside your head so he isn’t privy to your reasoning for such actions.

De este modo, él podría percibirlo como un signo de tu amargura.

Quererlo de vuelta

Y si alguna vez quieres recuperar a tu ex, estar amargado es el camino equivocado.

In his eyes, after you unfollow (or block) him, you’re likely to appear resentful and hurt about how things played out and therefore still very much hooked on him.

Puede que incluso lo exagere en su mente para aumentar su ego y hacerse ver como una influencia tan fuerte sobre tus decisiones.

¿Es éste el mensaje que quieres enviarle? ¿Es así como quieres que te vea?

Social media platforms are a huge part of our lives these days and therefore, he’ll definitely have a strong opinion about this.

Deciding to unfollow him all the while knowing you’re likely to want recuperar a tu ex algún día no es la decisión más inteligente.

¿Seguro que lo has pensado bien?

Terminado con él

On the other hand, if you’re over with this guy for good, why would you care what he thinks? He might see it as your revenge or game at first but once he realizes that you have no intention of unblocking him, he’ll see the truth.

Sooner or later, he’ll understand that you blocked him just to get rid of him. And that’s when he’ll realize what he’s lost. Of course, it will be too late then to get back into your life since you’ll be all healed.

¿Intentas ocultar algo?

Esta pregunta también aparecerá en su cabeza. ¿Intentas ocultarle una nueva relación?

What’s next… Changing your phone number and never texting him again, just like that?

Have you told your mutual friends not to share any of your personal info with him? If not, it’s likely that he’ll do whatever he can to get a hold of your social network profiles.

He’ll want to see what you’re posting at all costs. Suddenly, this guy will become more interesting in your whereabouts than he’s ever been before.

In that case, it’s better to unfriend his friends as well- or at least, to hide your stories from them.

Last week you were his best friend and so close to him becoming your fiance and today, you’re realizing you were in a broken relationship and last week was the last time you would call him el amor de mi vida…

Is this how it’s going to be now? Hiding from each other and him not even being able to see your profile picture anymore?

Who knows what’s going on and he sure as hell will picture the worst possible scenario. How is he supposed to know any better?

Si quieres recuperar a tu ex (en algún momento en el futuro) es posible que quieras reconsiderar bloquearlo en las redes sociales.

It’s a strong message and it’ll hurt your chances of reconciliation.

Véase también: 7 señales de una esposa distante emocionalmente y por qué se volvió así

You’re not handling the break-up well

You probably have your own reasons why you should block your ex but he’ll see what he wants to see.

In his head, it’ll seem as if you’re struggling with coping with the break-up.

You’re not doing well and the thought of seeing him on social media every day gives you anxiety.

Esto le da todo el poder. En su mente, él gana la ruptura.

He’ll feel sorry for you and that way, you’re highly unlikely to be seen as hot and attractive to him again.

He’ll pity you and see you like this chica rota but he’ll never want to take you back.

This way, he won’t see clearly what he’s losing and whatever you thought you had going for you will be amiss.

El desamor no es vergonzoso

But please, have one thing in mind: your reaction is completely normal. You’ve loved this guy and he was the center of your world for a long period of time.

It would be weird if you are utterly indifferent about losing him. You’re not a robot- you’re a human being. Therefore, it’s natural that you’re not okay with looking at photos with him with some other girl.

What I’m trying to tell you is not to be discouraged by his thoughts. Don’t keep on hurting yourself and don’t choose not to block him just because it would give him proof that you’re hurt.

Tener el corazón roto is nothing to be ashamed of. Let him “win”. Actually, the point is that you’re done competing.

Usted quiere seguir adelante con tu vida sin preocuparte de quién hizo qué primero y quién hizo el corte final. Y esta es la forma de hacerlo.

You’re playing mind games

And he’s simply not having it. This makes you seem completely fake and desperate. Who resorts to this type of thing? Only the weak and defeated.

At least, this is what he thinks. But hey, you know the truth very well and that’s all that matters.

The fact is that he’s probably comforting himself by acting like you’re the bad guy of the story.

It’s easier for him to put all the blame on you and to think that you’re into some toxic games than to rethink his actions and understand why you blocked him in the first place.

Así que deja que piense lo que quiera. Lo último que deberías hacer es darle explicaciones a este tipo.

You don’t owe him anything anymore- remember that.

Véase también: Así es como dejas de sentir celos de una chica más guapa

You’re being childish

If you appear childish and immature, he’s unlikely to get back in touch with you because seeing you like this will push him away.

Quiere ver un chica fuerte que sepa levantarse y conservar su dignidad durante todo el calvario, no una cría inmadura que recurre a los golpes bajos e intenta vengarse de su ex de las formas más malsanas.

This may not be the case but he’ll see it this way.

And if you’re also ignorando sus mensajes de texto y llamadas telefónicas mientras le ha dejado de seguir en las redes sociales, ¿qué otra cosa se supone que tiene que pensar?

You’re off-limits to him and if he wanted to talk to you about this, he literally has no platform to do so.

This is why blocking people shouldn’t be a rash decision. You should think it through and weigh up the pros and cons.

Only after being at peace with this decision, knowing you’re doing it for a higher purpose, should you actually go through with it.

Tu crecimiento personal y tu autocuidado son tus principales prioridades.

Through Your Perspective…

Now you’ve seen how this whole thing is likely to play out in his eyes, as you’ve probably noticed, it’s not pretty. 

He’ll see it how he chooses to see it and unless you have a conversation about it with him beforehand, things could go off the rails and you’ll never get your ex back- if that is something you want to do.

But now, it’s time to bring the focus back onto usted. Ahora tienes que hacerte algunas preguntas difíciles y buscar dentro de tu alma.

Now is the time where you finally realize what you’re about to do and why you’ve chosen this route.

¿Estás haciendo esto para crear un muro entre tú y tu ex novio o hay una parte de ti que todavía espera poder recuperar a tu ex?

If so, it’s really crucial to ask yourself the following questions before choosing to block him on social media for good.

Véase también: ¿Sexo con amigos? Los 10 mayores secretos que nadie te contará

¿Cuál es su principal objetivo?

This is the first thing you should ask yourself and here’s why. During break-ups and heartbreaks, one often forgets to nourish oneself and take care of what they need at this time.

And I assume this might be the case with you too. In all of this conundrum, you’re likely to have forgotten about yourself, your needs, and your wants.

¿Qué anhela tu corazón en este momento? ¿Qué intenta decirte tu cabeza?

Escúchalo y date un capricho sea cual sea. Ahora mismo, deberías estar su primera opción.

This part of your journey should never be about him. It’s all about you and being your own best friend.

¿Es tu intención apartar a tu ex de tu vida y centrarte en un nuevo futuro en el que él no te influya? ¿Es este el primer paso en tu viaje para seguir adelante?

¿Quieres cortar todos los lazos con tu pasado para poder disfrutar de tu presente y dar un salto hacia tu futuro? ¿Estás pasando página?

Or do you want to seek reconciliation at some point and by blocking him, you’re merely trying to get his attention (in the worst way imaginable) and make him see what he’s losing?

¿Es ésta su técnica de manipulación? ¿Es usted ignorándole para llamar su atención? ¿Estás jugando?

What is your main focus right now? Your ex or finding yourself again? Look- I’m no Judge Judy- I just want you to be dead honest towards yourself so you’re able to make the right call.

¿Bloquear a tu ex te acercará al cierre?

¿Qué aspira a conseguir bloqueándole en las redes sociales?

¿Buscas entender lo que ocurrió entre vosotros y necesitas espacio para resolverlo?

¿Desea crear una separación muy necesaria de esa parte de su vida para centrarse en cerrar ese capítulo?

Those should be your main goals—what you need, as opposed to what his reaction will be.

Dejar de seguirle debería servir para darte paz y tranquilidad, en lugar de volverte loca por no ver sus redes sociales.

¿Esto te va a aportar un cierre? ¿Serás capaz de encontrar consuelo después de bloquearle y seguir adelante por el bien de tu propio bienestar?

¿Serás capaz de ponerte en contacto con la chica que un día fuiste pero que ya no ves en el espejo?

Si bloquearlo te va a hacer ganar más de lo que pierdes, entonces, por supuesto, hazlo.

But if the distance and the not knowing what he’s up to will keep nagging at you, perhaps this is not the best solution.

Véase también: 8 problemas de las relaciones a distancia (y cómo hacer que funcionen)

¿Intentas enviarle un mensaje bloqueándole?

¿Intentas ser preventiva bloqueándole porque crees que él podría hacerlo primero?

¿Le guardas rencor porque he still hasn’t answered your text message so you hope that by blocking him you’ll let him know how pissed you are?

Are you indirectly (and not-so-subtly) sending him some kind of message? If so, that’s the worst reason to do this.

Never act out of anger or desperation. You’re guaranteed to regret it in the future.

Your best solution here is to be honest and direct with your ex. If you want to let him know about how you’re feeling right now, pick up the phone and call him.

If you’re too sensitive and don’t want to hear his voice, send him a text message. Directness is always the best choice.

Don’t let him come to his own conclusion simply because your ego is telling you to act this way.

Sé fuerte y afronta esto de frente. Si necesitas que escuche algo, ¡díselo!

¿Es sólo una solución a corto plazo?

Sometimes, we put up barriers that stand in the way of our happiness and we’re totally oblivious to it.

This could be the cause of your emotional downfall. You’re trying to fix this by making a rash decision that you know isn’t going to provide you with long-term happiness.

You’re likely to wake up the next day and feel resentful about blocking him on all his social media accounts instead of being honest about what you really need.

¿De verdad quieres golpear ese dejar de seguir botón ¿o sólo intentas poner una tirita en una herida profunda?

Don’t you think you’ll start wondering what he’s doing and if he’s in a new relationship and this way, you’ll never be able to know?

It will be eating you alive and you’ll have nobody to blame but yourself.

At some point, you’re going to wish to be a part of his life again (not necessarily as his girlfriend) and this will make it extremely difficult.

How do you think you’ll feel afterwards?

Imagine that you’ve actually gone through with it and you’ve finally blocked him.

Right now, you can’t see his feed, not even his profile picture. He’s vanished from your online reality and the damage is done.

¿Cómo te sientes? ¿Estás en paz y contento?

¿Te ves levantándote al día siguiente y sintiéndote satisfecho con esta decisión? ¿Sientes el impulso de consultar su Instagram?

Do you need to check his Twitter to see what he’s been posting about lately?

Todas estas son preguntas que te rondarán por la cabeza después de bloquearle.

¿Está dispuesto a correr el riesgo de no sentirse realizado con esta decisión?

Las secuelas serán algo digno de ver. Y deberías estar preparado para la montaña rusa emocional por la que podrías pasar.

This is what it’s all about. Blocking your ex might give you the perspective you’re lacking right now and even if you learn to regret it, at least you’ll know for sure.

There’s no right or wrong answer here. Just you and your gut feeling.

Véase también: Cómo poner fin a un romance con integridad y ayudarle a dejarlo para siempre

¿Debo bloquear a mi ex durante la ausencia de contacto?

If you know that you won’t resist the urge to call or text your ex, the best choice is to block them. I mean, what’s the point of the periodo de no contacto if you’ll spend it stalking their accounts or even worse- talking to them every now and then.

But before you make this decision, please be honest about why you’re going no contact.

¿Es una forma de recuperar a tu ex pareja? ¿Quieres que empezar a echarte de menos and see what they’ve lost?

In that case, it would be best to ignore them without actually blocking them. Yes, I know what you must be thinking right now: if they want to revive your past relationship, they’ll find a way to reach out to you.

And you’re not wrong. Nevertheless, is your ex the kind of person who will send love letters to your home address or contact your friends just to get a hold of you?

Or is it more possible that they will see you blocking them as a big sign that you two are really over? Will they just accept your “no” as a final decision without pursuing you any further?

On the other hand, the situation is quite different if you’re cutting all possible ties because you really want to move on. In that case, unfriend or block them the moment your relationship ends.

¿Es inmaduro bloquear a tu ex?

Blocking your ex as a way of getting even or as a part of your mind games is, without doubt, childish and unnecessary. Nevertheless, if you’re thinking about blocking your ex’s number to save yourself and your mental health- there is nothing immature about that.

In the first case, you’re being toxic. Whether you admit it or not, you’re just doing it to break their heart and to play with them a bit longer.

But in the other case, you’re just putting your sanity in the first place. If you have a hard time telling them “no” (but you know they’ll try to pull your heartstrings), see blocking them as a programa de autocuidado.

It’s just a way to heal your corazón roto más rápido y eso es en realidad lo más maduro que puedes hacer.

¿Es mejor bloquear o ignorar a un ex?

This question doesn’t have a universal answer because it all depends on your specific situation. If you can deal with looking at your ex’s posts and photos all over your social networks- then it’s always better to ignore them.

The same goes for the ex who won’t disturb you in any way- there is no need to block them on WhatsApp or on any social media.

On the other hand, if you’re dealing with an ex who keeps showing up in your life or even worse, with an ex abusivo que te está molestando todo el tiempo- bloquearlos es el camino a seguir.

Of course, you always have to be 100% honest with yourself to make the right decision. If you’re secretly hoping to get a second chance with your ex, ignoring them beats blocking them.

¿Bloquear a mi ex me ayudará a seguir adelante?

“Out of sight, out of mind”. Not seeing your ex’s phone number on your display, not stumbling upon their photos all over social networks, and not knowing what they’ve been up to certainly will help you get over them.

You can’t expect to move on with your life, as long as you’re stalking their online status, their followers, and their stories. Even though you two broke up, you’re still involved in their life and that won’t bring you any good.

Por lo tanto, ir de cabeza con ellos le ayudará a entender que it’s really over. Sí, al principio será doloroso.

It will deprive you of a false sense of security. Your ex might not be physically present in your life. But they’re present on your phone and that’s better than anything, right?

What you need is a fresh start. You need to start a new life and it’s about time to leave the past in the past.

¿Es de mala educación ignorar a tu ex?

If your ex wishes you a happy birthday and you know that a simple reply won’t affect your emotional health- I don’t see a point in ignoring them.

But if they act like you’re still together, negatively impact your progress or a new relationship- there is nothing rude about paying no attention to their attempts to reach out.

Look, you have to make a difference between an ex who says “hi” when you run into them and the one who blows your phone up all the time.

Esto también depende de cómo hayáis roto. Si no ha pasado nada demasiado horrible, no hace falta que gires la cabeza cuando los veas.

This person was a huge part of your life and you should observe them as an old friend you haven’t seen in a while. Chit chat with them, have some small talk and continue with your day as nothing happened.

Pero ¿qué pasa con un ex que sigue suplicando una segunda oportunidad? What about that ex who tries to come back into your life the moment you think you’re over them?

What about the ex who abuses you mentally and emotionally? What about the one who continues sending you good night and good morning texts and wants to talk to you every day, as if you’re still together?

Well, since you’re a polite person with excellent manners, try explaining your point to them. Tell them honestly that you don’t think keeping in touch is a good idea.

Nevertheless, if they continue harassing you this way or another, just ignore them. Sooner or later, they’ll get the message and they’ll give up on you.

¿Qué ha aprendido?

Esperamos que este artículo le haya ayudado a tomar una decisión informada sobre este delicado asunto y le haya ayudado a avanzar con una visión clara de todos los escenarios posibles.

Tú eres lo primero

Lo más importante que espero que saques de todo esto es la importancia de a ti.

En sufriendo el desamorA menudo pasamos por el aro y, en medio de la tristeza, la amargura y el arrepentimiento, nos olvidamos de cómo cuidar de nosotros mismos.

Nos centramos demasiado en nuestro ex y nos olvidamos de cuidar nuestro propio bienestar.

This is your wake-up call. Your reality check is here to let you know that the right decision is the one you can make today and be sure you won’t regret the next day.

Decidir mientras se lucha y se está al borde de un colapso mental es perjudicial para la propia salud mental.

When feeling so overwhelmed and anxious, it’s best to take a step back and focus on yourself. Not on your ex, not on his social media and not on getting even.

Solución temporal

Hazlo. Ayúdate a ser mejor. Después de haber hecho eso y haber llegado a un lugar más feliz, toma una decisión que vaya de la mano con tu nuevo yo.

Don’t bring yourself down just to show your ex something he won’t even see.

Si quieres bloquearlo para hacer borrón y cuenta nueva y pasar página, adelante, hazlo.

Pero si tu único objetivo es enviarle un mensaje, quizá no sea una decisión acertada después de todo.

Haz caso a tus instintos y piensa en tu objetivo final. Una solución temporal te proporcionará una felicidad temporal.

Pero una decisión bien meditada allanará el camino hacia un futuro más feliz que probablemente dure mucho tiempo.

Para concluir

I don’t know if I managed to give you a specific answer to your question “Should I block my ex?”. But that’s the point- nobody can make that decision for you.

I gave you some directions that, I’m sure, helped you a lot. Nevertheless, at the end of the day, you have to be a big girl and hit that button by yourself. Or live with the fact that your ex can reach out whenever he feels like it- it’s up to you.

Think things through, sleep it over and I promise you that you’ll make the right call. I’m rooting for you!