Por qué mi novia es tan mala conmigo (16 razones + formas de superarlo)
Your girl has too frequent mood swings and it simply became unbearable? At first, you thought she’s just having a few bad days or that it’s that time of the month and how it’ll all pass but you were wrong because it’s not passing?
You can’t find more excuses for her comportamiento pasivo-agresivo ni puedes tolerarlo más. No dejas de darle vueltas y vueltas a lo mismo: ‘why is my girlfriend so mean to me?’.
Don’t worry, I’m here to help you figure out the reason why your girlfriend’s behavior towards you has changed and how to fix it.
All I can say to you right now is that even though it seems like there is no proper reason or explanation for her bad behavior, trust me, there is. And you’ll definitely need to get to the root cause of her passive-aggressive behavior, if you want and plan to save your relationship.
¿Por qué mi novia es tan mala conmigo? 16 posibles razones
So, here are all the external factors that may affect your girlfriend’s mood and cause her bad behavior. The answer to your question ‘why is my girlfriend mean to me’ is hidden in one of these possible causes.
1. La lastimaste
Your actions may be the reason for your girlfriend’s bad mood and behavior. She probably isn’t actuar sin una razón, así que intenta volver a los últimos días y piensa si hiciste algo que pudiera herirla.
If you did, if you remember your wrongdoing, try to make it right. Apologize to her and convince her that you’ll never repeat that mistake again, or at least, that you’ll try not to repeat it.
2. Sus sentimientos por ti han desaparecido
Por desgracia, ésta es una de las razones más dolorosas por las que tu novia es mala contigo. Puede que se haya desenamorado y todos sus sentimientos hacia ti hayan desaparecido.
I know what you’re thinking right now and I completely agree with you. It still isn’t a reason to be mean or abusive towards you. She can simply romper y hacer las cosas más fáciles para ambos.
Sin embargo, puede que todo el amor que antes sentía por ti se haya convertido en odio. Tal vez la decepcionaste o se hartó de tu comportamiento tóxico y empezó a odiarte. Su comportamiento mezquino puede ser una clara señal del odio y el desprecio que siente por ti.
3. She’s having an affair
Don’t be surprised if you run into your girlfriend’s profile on a dating site or you start noticing traces of her infidelity because her bad behavior may be a red flag that she’s cheating on you.
Perhaps she isn’t brave enough to leave you, so she’s being mean to you para hacerte romper primero. Si sigue comportándose de la misma manera y faltarte al respetodeberías concederle su deseo y terminar vuestra relación.
4. Tiene una personalidad mezquina
¿Tu novia siempre fue mala contigo? ¿Explotó ese mal humor y comportamiento desde el principio de vuestra relación?
Piense en esto. Si las respuestas a estas preguntas son afirmativas, lamentablemente tengo muy malas noticias para usted. Your girlfriend is mean by her nature and you’ll hardly make her become a better person.
5. Tiene problemas personales
Tienes que comprobar si tu pareja está lidiando con algunos problemas personales de los que no sabes nada. Y sí, debería ser ella la que te contara esas cosas pero quizás she’s too shy or she simply doesn’t want to involve you in those problems.
Habla con ella y pregúntale si es así. Si decide confesártelo, debes escucharla, darle tu apoyo y preguntarle si puedes ayudarla de alguna manera. Si rechaza tu ayuda, respétala y déjala que luche. problemas personales por sí misma.
Just make sure she knows you’re there for her no matter when and what.
6. Cambios hormonales
El cuerpo femenino es realmente magnífico. La cantidad de cambios y transmisiones que experimenta a lo largo de la vida es sencillamente increíble.
Those changes may be one of the reasons for your girl’s bad or changeable mood. Maybe she’s in those times of the month or maybe she’s having health issues. If her bad behavior is to be blamed on her hormones, you really need to be patient and show understanding to your better half more than ever.
7. 7. Problemas de salud mental
¿Tu novia sufre depresión o ansiedad? ¿Has notado algún episodio extraño en su comportamiento?
Si su novia recibe extraño y malhumorado de repente y sin una razón adecuada, puede ser una bandera roja que ella tiene problemas de salud mental. La depresión es una enfermedad muy grave y, por desgracia, puede estar causada por desequilibrio hormonal.
8. Decepción por expectativas no cumplidas
La verdad es que, al principio de la relación, todos nos creamos expectativas altas y poco realistas. Afortunadamente, la mayoría de nosotros bajamos esos expectativas una vez que nos entreguemos a una relación más seria y llegar a conocer a nuestra pareja a un nivel más profundo.
However, some of us also decide to keep our expectations and end up disappointed after some time. Their partner simply fails to meet their high expectations and they conclude that it means they don’t love them.
If this is the problem, you need to know that it’s really not your fault. Your significant other needs to learn to keep her expectation bar at a realistic level and she won’t have to go through this again.
9. She realizes you aren’t compatible
Maybe all this time both of you have failed to realize one important thing… Usted aren’t compatible despite the feelings you have for each other and you probably won’t be able to maintain your relationship.
Your girlfriend may realize it now and that’s the reason she’s acting so weird. She’s mad both at you and herself for not noticing it sooner.
10. She’s dealing with trust issues
Puede que haya problemas de confianza from before or you may have done something and lost her trust. She’s behaving so meanly because she’s mad at you for losing her trust and she knows too well that every relationship is doomed to fail if there is no trust between partners.
So, if you’ve cheated on her or betrayed her in any way, try to fix that. Make her trust you again and don’t ever gamble with her trust again.
11. Falta de respeto
There is only one surefire answer to your question ‘why is my girlfriend mean to me’, and that is because she doesn’t respect you enough.
You know the saying: when there is no respect, there is no love either. Your girl isn’t even afraid that her bad behavior may make you leave her because she doesn’t even love you.
She’ll continue with her comportamiento pasivo-agresivo and sooner or later, you’ll realize that she really doesn’t respect you. You’ll start losing the respect you have for her and along with losing that respect, you’ll also be losing your feelings.
12. It’s her way of seeking attention
Si tu chica tiene cambios de humor demasiado a menudo y sin ninguna razón adecuada, puede que estés tratando con una gran buscadora de atención. Tal vez solo quiere ser el centro de atención y esta es su forma de conseguirlo.
She knows that you’ll think about it all the time and that it’ll bother you. She also knows that you’ll try to get some answers out of her or her close people and that kind of attention is precisely the thing she’s looking for.
Si quieres una reina del drama en tu vida, hazlo. Sin embargo, si quieres vivir una vida sin dramas, tienes que poner fin a tu relación lo antes posible.
13. O, una técnica manipuladora para controlarte
Does she show her bad behavior and then come to cuddle you after a few moments as if nothing happened? It’s obvious that she’s playing with you.
Tu novia es una gran manipuladora y al ser pasivo-agresiva, sólo quiere volverte loco. Quiere bajar tu autoestima, lo que le permitiría controlarte más fácilmente.
If this is the case, then it’s also obvious that she doesn’t love you the same way you love her. Recuerda que una persona que te quiere de verdad nunca podría manipularte ni jugar contigo. También, comportamiento controlador isn’t a sign of love.
14. Malas experiencias pasadas
Si tu novia acaba de terminar una relación tóxica y abusivatambién puede ser una de las razones por las que se comporta tan mal contigo.
Someone has hurt her in the past and now, she can’t trust you or any other man. She isn’t angry at you, she is angry at all males and she’s angry at herself for allowing another person to hurt her the way that person from her past hurt her.
15. 15. Baja autoestima
You’re wondering what is the connection between your girlfriend’s self-esteem and her bad behavior? Well, if she has low self-esteem, she might be projecting her bad mood and flaws onto you.
It may help her feel better in her own skin but it never lasts for too long because it’s definitely not a way to deal with low self-esteem.
16. Tu novia enfadada en realidad está enfadada consigo misma
Just because your girlfriend is being mean towards you, it doesn’t mean that she’s angry at you. It may mean that she’s angry at herself, too.
She isn’t happy deep down and she definitely isn’t pleased with herself. She longs for changes in life but she simply doesn’t know where to begin.
It all affects her self-worth and she starts asking herself whether she’s really worthy of being loved by someone.
Además, quizá hizo daño a otra persona en el pasado y ahora, el karma le ha pasado factura. She’s probably regretting her past deeds now and she isn’t able to forgive them to herself and that’s why she has those frequent mood swings.
Véase también: Mi marido es malo conmigo y está arruinando lentamente nuestro matrimonio
11 maneras eficaces de tratar a una novia malhumorada y enfadada
Follow these advice and I’m sure you’ll manage to help your girlfriend change and save your relationship.
1. Intenta ponerte en su lugar
Cuando tu novia se enfada o se pone de mal humor, lo mejor que puedes hacer para ayudarla es comprenderla. Ponte en su lugar e intenta imaginar cómo el estrés o su problemas personales te afectaría.
Would you be moody? Would you try to vent it out on a person you love and know won’t resent you? I think you would, too.
2. Busca posibles motivos en sus redes sociales
If you can’t find out the real reason from your girlfriend, you should go on a little investigating trip.
Búscala redes socialesy hablar con sus amigos y compañeros de trabajo. Ask them whether she is having some personal problems you don’t know about and maybe they’ll reveal the real reason for your girlfriend’s bad behavior.
3. Don’t allow her to use you as a punching bag
The thing is, no matter the reason your girlfriend has for her bad behavior, you should never allow her to treat you as a punching bag. She should know that she can share absolutely everything with you but she can’t vent out to you every single day.
Ayudarla a manejar sus emociones o problemas personales que está teniendo, sino ayudarla a afrontarlo de forma saludable. Venting out on you won’t help her, it’ll just make her suppress her emotions which will create even bigger issues and problems.
4. Confía en tu mejor amigo
You need to share your sorrows and the issues that are bothering you so much with your loved one. It doesn’t matter whether it’ll be a friend or a family member, the important thing is that you trust that person.
Ask them to keep that a secret because you don’t want your girlfriend to know that you’re sharing things from your relationship with other people. Quién sabe, a lo mejor esa persona te da un consejo que resolverá todos tus problemas.
5. Consigue que se abra a ti
Necesita reconecta con tu pareja if you want to find out the reasons behind her bad behavior. The only way you’ll do that is through communication.
Tienes que animarla a abrir to you and if she trusts you, she’ll do it. If she doesn’t trust you, on the other hand, then it’s no wonder she behaves the way she does.
6. Centrarse en la creación de límites saludables
Si su relación se basaba en límites saludables, these kinds of things wouldn’t be even happening in the first place. Your partner would know she can’t behave the way she does and she would do everything in order to control her mood.
La quieres, lo entiendo. El amor es algo realmente desafiante a veces. You love someone you’re sure isn’t the right person for you but you still can’t delete them from your heart or out of your life.
However, you need to reset the boundaries in your relationship. Your girlfriend should respect you and know where the line is. Don’t tolerate her disrespect just because you love her because amor verdadero nunca tolera la falta de respeto.
7. Trabaje para mejorar su estilo de comunicación
Una comunicación poco sana nunca puede conducir a una relación sana. La comunicación entre la pareja es la base más importante para el éxito de una relación y una pareja nunca podrá durar y mantener una buena relación si su estilo de comunicación es deficiente.
If she doesn’t want to talk, if she needs personal space, respect her wishes. If her mal humor y comportamiento afectan al tuyo, tienes que calmarte.
Don’t react in the heat of the moment because you’ll regret your actions if they are controlled by your intense emotions.
8. Deja de descuidar las pequeñas cosas
It’s true that most men think it’s impossible to understand women. However, it’s also true that most women get angry or change their mood because their partners keep ignoring and neglecting the little things that mean so much to us, women.
Acuérdate de las fechas importantes y sorpréndela de vez en cuando con un bonito regalo o un acto de cariño. Dile que la quieres más a menudo. Escríbele un poema de amor. Dale las gracias por formar parte de tu vida y por todo lo que hace por ti.
9. Her bad behavior doesn’t have to mean your girlfriend hates you
Even though it’s probably something you’re thinking about, you should know that your girlfriend’s bad mood doesn’t mean she hates you.
Puede que te guarde rencor, pero odio es una palabra muy pesada.
If you try to walk in her shoes, you may succeed in understanding her. Right now, all you can do is be there for her, give her your complete support and hope that you’ll get through it all together and forget about everything as if it never even happened.
10. Si nada cambia, su situación sentimental debería
If your girlfriend keeps denying she has a problem and doesn’t even think about changing her bad behavior, you should give up. You can spend your life trying to change someone or something that obviously doesn’t want to change.
You don’t deserve to be with someone who doesn’t love and, most importantly, appreciates you.
You need to know when enough is enough because otherwise you’ll lose yourself and it’s indeed the only thing you’ll never be able to forgive yourself.
11. Permita que su corazón se rinda
The more your girlfriend continues to exploit her passive-aggressive behavior, the less you’ll love her. The truth is, your heart can’t keep loving and holding onto someone who keeps breaking it and doesn’t even care about the damage they do to you.
Perhaps you’ve created a toxic attachment or maybe you simply got used to your partner but the truth is, you don’t love them the way you did before. You simply can’t because of everything they did to you.
En el fondo, tu corazón también lo sabe. Sólo tienes que escucharlo con más atención y permitir que finalmente se rinda. Dejar ir por fin a la persona que tanto daño hizo y dejó marcas imborrables.
¿Qué es una novia tóxica?
If your girl is always in a bad mood, if you can’t communicate in a healthy way with her, if she struggles with anger issues, if you constantly feel like you’re walking on eggshells around her… Those are all clear red flags you’re dealing with a toxic girlfriend.
The truth is, you can’t expect to build a relación sana con un compañero tóxico. Por mucho que lo intentes, su comportamiento mezquino y su actitud tóxica seguirán envenenando vuestra relación.
The reason for her toxicity may be a lack of feelings for you or deep mental health issues. However, that’s not even important.
The important thing is that she’s toxic and that you’ll never be able to be completely happy in that relationship.
If your partner doesn’t change, no matter how much you try to keep it all together, the foundations of your relationship will slowly be falling apart until one day they completely crush down into pieces.
¿Por qué las novias se ponen tan de mal humor?
We all have bad days, it’s a fact. However, feminine hormones are different from male and women can never deal with some things and emotions the same way men do.
Cuando una mujer está en esas momentos del mes, those hormones start changing and it all affects the woman’s mood. That’s why frequent and unexpected mood swings are actually quite normal during PMS. Learning cómo tratar a tu novia cuando está con la regla es esencial.
Otra posible causa de cambios de humor puede ser problemas de salud mental. If a woman struggles with depression or anxiety or some similar mental health issue, she isn’t able to deal with personal problems and intense emotions in a healthy way.
Además, la menopausia y el embarazo también pueden ser causas de frecuentes cambios de humor en una mujer. During those periods, a woman’s body goes through different transformations and it’s really hard for a woman to deal with it all without allowing it to affect her mood.
¿Cómo puedo controlar a mi novia?
The truth is, you can’t and you shouldn’t. You shouldn’t even think about it because it won’t help you save your relationship.
As a matter of fact, it may help you save it but it definitely won’t help you fix it. You’ll keep her in your life but your relationship will remain toxic and it’ll keep getting worse and worse.
Sólo puedes motivar y animar a tus pareja cambiar por el bien de tu amor y tu relación. Desahógate con ella y hazle saber cómo su mal comportamiento afecta a vuestra relación y perjudica tu bienestar mental y emocional.
Don’t threaten her with a breakup because that might only get her in an even worse mood.
Remember, you shouldn’t be thinking about ways to control your girlfriend. You should help her learn to control her own mood and emotions because that’s the key to saving your relationship.
To Stay Or To Leave… That’s The Question
I’m sure that this ‘why is my girlfriend so mean to me’ question isn’t the only question that wanders around in your head. You also wonder how to know for sure when to stay and fight and when to cut the line and leave for good.
Well, it’s actually easy to answer that question. Si notas que tu chica realmente intenta cambiar y se esfuerza por arreglar tu relación tóxica, deberías darle otra oportunidad y seguir luchando.
On the other hand, if she doesn’t give a single hope that she’ll ever change her mean behavior, if your relationship doesn’t get any better, you should give up on her and make that relationship a part of your past.
No importa cuánto ames o te preocupes por alguien, nunca debes tolerar la falta de respeto y mal comportamiento. Ni el amor ni ninguna otra cosa son nunca una buena razón para permanecer en una relación abusiva.