There’s something about texting that makes it easier to talk about things that you’d find difficult discussing face-to-face with someone you’re still getting to know. On the other hand, tone and body language are an important part of communication, so when they’re missing in texts, a misunderstanding can happen in a flash.
How to text your crush without being boring and pushy? The best approach while you’re still in the getting-to-know-you stage is to keep things flirty and funny. Pick light teasing over being suggestive – even if you’ve met on a dating app and both know why you’re talking to each other.
Until you get to know the other person better, it’s best not to tell weird jokes or be too seductive with flirting. You don’t know their sense of humor or what their preferences are, so too much too soon can be off-putting. Keep reading for tips on how to keep the conversation flow easy and fun, as well as some lines you can use in an emergency.
How To Text Your Crush Without Being Boring?
One of the worst things you could text your crush is “Hi,” or “What’s up?” The reason why you shouldn’t do it is because, even though you were the one to start the conversation, you didn’t really do anything, so the burden of thinking of something to say is now on the other person.
Now they not only have to respond, they also have to think of what to say if they’re interested in the conversation. This is why those conversation starters get you responses that are equally as vapid, if you’re lucky enough to get one at all.
The best relationship advice on how to text your crush without being boring is to make replying to your text easy and fun. Figuring out how to start a conversation with your crush and keep it going will take just a minute if you carefully read these tips.
1. Invite your crush to talk about themselves
Start the conversation by asking your crush a question, then listen. Everyone loves talking about themselves, so keeping them talking about their own interests, experiences and thoughts is the best topic you could choose.
Keep the conversation going by responding to what they say, the same way you would if you were talking face-to-face. Don’t look for a formula, just listen. If you don’t know how to respond, you can always ask them to give you more details about something they were talking about.
2. Follow up
The first text is always the most difficult, but once you’ve had at least one conversation, it gets easier. The best way to start the convo is by following up on the previous one. Show your crush you’ve been paying attention by mentioning something they talked about the last time.
If they’ve mentioned that they have something coming up, ask them how it went. If they recommended you a Netflix show or a song, let them know you checked it out and what you thought.
This is the best way to show your crush that you’re interested in what they have to say, which will make them like talking to you more.
Knowing you’re interested and paying attention will make them more relaxed and keep the conversation going.
3. Find common interests
Nothing will keep the conversation flowing like realizing that both of you are excited about a certain topic and have a lot to say about it. Ask your crush about their interests and the things they like, or look for a hint on their social media. If they’re really into something, they might post about it.
Even if they’re not sharing, their content might give you an idea and steer you in the direction of what you might ask. If none of your interests match, don’t worry.
Don’t pretend you share an interest – ask for recommendations instead. This way, you’ll have something you can share, and if it’s something they’re really passionate about, they’ll love exchanging text messages on the subject.
4. Don’t force the conversation
Follow the conversation, and when it stops, don’t try to push it any further. In general, you shouldn’t double text, but rather wait until they text you back before you text again. This isn’t a rule, however. Don’t follow some ideas that you should wait a specific number of days before you text; rather pay attention to their level of interest.
You can tell that they’re interested if they eagerly respond when you text them, so use your judgment on whether or not to text them again. If they only give you one-word replies and never initiate the conversation, pull back a little. If they’re interested in you, they’ll reach out. If they don’t seem interested in you, don’t be clingy.
If you text them after some time has passed, don’t ask why they did not text back. Rather share something interesting or funny, like a TikTok or a link to restart the conversation without pressure.
5. Text the way you talk
Be casual but comprehensible. A good idea is to read your text out loud before sending it to see if it sounds natural. Try talking the same way you talk in real life, without too many adjustments. Don’t fake a way of talking.
Be careful of your tone. Make sure you don’t accidentally sound sarcastic or mean when you’re not trying to be. Show your crush that you’re putting some effort into your texts by using at least some amount of punctuation. An emoji can serve both as tone markers and punctuation, so use them.
6. Ask open-ended questions
Ask your crush questions that both show interest and invite conversation. Don’t ask them things like, “Did you get tired at work today?”
because they might just say “No” and that’s it. Keep in mind that your crush might be struggling with what to say too.
Instead, ask something like, “What’s the most fun thing that happened at work today?” to give them a specific topic. Even if nothing particularly fun has happened, they’ll still make a choice about what to talk about and you can follow up on their answer.
Ask them about their day, ask for their opinion on something, share your experiences and ask them to tell you about a similar one, or tell a story that will draw out a reaction out of your crush.
7. Don’t overwhelm them
Avoid overly long walls of text or a bunch of texts in a row. Keep the conversation easy-going until you get to know each other a little better.
Long monologues are hard to read and a bit too much to take, so sum up what you have to say into a max of five, short texts that you can send in one after another. Don’t overdo it and attack your crush with notifications.
Keep things casual when it comes to what you choose to talk about. Avoid anything uncomfortable, both things that most people don’t like to talk about and things you know your crush would rather not be bothered with. Also stay away from serious and potentially controversial topics like politics and religion.
8. Skip the small talk
Sure, you can use weather or current holidays to start a conversation, but don’t base your entire interaction on things that don’t really move your relationship forward. Talk about things related to either or both of you in some way. Ask thought-provoking questions or laugh together. Also avoid pick up lines, unless you’re using them jokingly.
Participate in the conversation by sharing details about yourself related to the conversation. For example, if your crush tells you they were in a club in high school, tell them which one you were part of. This is a great way to share interests and talk about your previous experiences.
Just don’t take over the conversation.
9. Keep the conversation going
When you see that the topic of your conversation is close to being exhausted and you want to continue talking to your crush, steer the conversation in a new direction. Change the topic to something that’s related, but one you’ll be talking about for the first time.
To have an interesting conversation, let it progress as naturally as possible. However, if you see that the frequency of your crush’s responses is declining, don’t try to force it. Maybe they’re tired or doing something else, so rather end the conversation. You can always continue the next day.
10. Have fun talking to your crush
How to not be a dry texter? It’s simple: have fun texting. If you do, you won’t have to overthink and worry. Be playful, be funny and base your texts on positivity and mutual enjoyment. Make your crush smile with fun texting games, funny memes, use GIFs and emojis, and send photos and voice notes to move away from too much seriousness.
Remember, if the conversation is more frustrating than fun, what’s the point? If you’re both enjoying your texting, you can take things to the next level by making a phone call instead of texting. And if all goes well, use this chance to ask your crush out on a first date.
100 Good Conversation Starters For Texting Your Crush
When you’re looking for ways to start a conversation with your crush, instead of choosing random conversation starters, the most effective approach is to think about your previous conversations. Remember what they responded to with enthusiasm, and what got you one-word responses or made them clam up.
If you’re having trouble thinking of anything at the moment, go through this list of funny, cute and flirty texts and good conversation topics for texting when you want to get to know your crush better. You might just find the perfect text conversation starters to break the ice and get the texting going with your crush.
1. What are your plans for the weekend?
2. Can you help me choose between these two things?
3. Who’s your favorite fictional character?
4. Do you listen to any podcasts?
5. Have you ever sent a weird text by accident?
6. Are you a morning person?
7. Do you believe in love at first sight?
8. What is the meaning of success to you?
9. What traits do you look for in a partner?
10. How do you like to spend your time?
11. Have you ever had the chance to help someone?
12. What did you want to become when you were a kid?
13. What do you always have to have with you?
14. Send me the best photo you’ve ever taken.
15. What’s your favorite childhood memory?
16. What was the best gift you’ve ever gotten?
17. What’s something that you’re really bad at?
18. What’s your zodiac sign?
19. What’s your dream job?
20. Which one of your friends did you not get along with at first?
21. What kind of breakfast do you like?
22. What’s the best advice you’ve ever got?
23. What’s the most embarrassing thing you have ever said or done?
24. Where’s your favorite ice cream place?
25. What’s your favorite thing to buy?
26. What was the most beautiful view you have ever seen?
27. Do you prefer texting or calling?
28. What’s your favorite season?
29. What is your worst trait?
30. What do you like to do when the weather is nice?
31. What sport do you like to watch?
32. Do you like reading?
33. What aspects of being in a relationship do you enjoy?
34. What’s your hidden talent?
35. What kind of funny stuff makes you laugh?
36. When was the last time you cried?
37. Do you have any pets? If so, what are they?
38. Who inspires you?
39. What do you spend too much money on?
40. Share your favorite playlist.
41. What’s the best compliment that someone could give you?
42. How did you meet your best friend?
43. What are your favorite topics to talk about?
44. What is your most cherished life experience so far?
45. What song has special memories for you?
46. What song do you listen to most often?
47. What’s something you love to do?
48. What job would you suck at?
49. Are you still in touch with some of your childhood friends?
50. What surprises people the most about you?
51. What have you been really into lately?
52. Are you a cat person or a dog person?
53. What three words describe you best?
54. Would you like to start a business?
55. Do you like change?
56. What are you currently binge watching?
57. What’s your favorite comedy movie?
58. Where would you like to live?
59. What’s your favorite cuisine?
60. What are you most thankful for?
61. Which family member are you the most similar to?
62. What interests you the most at the moment?
63. What’s your favorite movie quote?
64. What’s the best part of your day?
65. What do you find funny but most people don’t?
66. What do you think about a lot?
67. Describe your day with a single emoji.
68. What’s the best food you’ve ever eaten?
69. What was your worst date?
70. What motivates you?
71. What’s your favorite smell?
72. What’s your favorite meme?
73. How many countries have you visited?
74. What’s the best book you’ve read?
75. What are you passionate about?
76. What’s your ideal vacation?
77. What do you do for stress-relief?
78. How would your friends describe you?
79. Tell me the worst joke you know.
80. What’s the most daring thing you’ve ever done?
81. What makes you nervous?
82. What is one goal you hope to achieve in your life?
83. What do you appreciate the most about your family?
84. What do you wish you knew sooner?
85. What’s your favorite fast food?
86. What brings meaning to your life?
87. Who would play you in a movie about your life?
88. What makes you competitive?
89. What’s your favorite snack?
90. What are your guilty pleasures?
91. What’s the worst job in the world?
92. Do you have any regrets?
93. Are you working on anything interesting right now?
94. Tell me something about you that you want me to know.
95. Do you have a bucket list?
96. Where’s your favorite place to order food from?
97. Do you believe in destiny?
98. What kind of art do you like?
99. What trips would you like to go to?
100. What’s your favorite thing to do online?
Don’t Be A Boring Texter
Talking to your crush can be nerve-wracking, especially if you like them a lot. However, finding the right thing to say at the right moment is much easier when you’re texting than in real life. It gives you an opportunity to show them another side of you, particularly if you‘re shy.
Rapid-fire exchange of texts is the most fun way to do it. Texting still allows for small breaks to gather your thoughts and figure out how to text your crush without being boring. Keep all the tips above in mind, and when you’re at a loss on what to say, one of these starters and conversation topIcs will surely give you something to build your convo on.