Here you go now, you got what you wanted, and you lost me forever. I still remember that day when you were struggling to choose between me and her.
And do you remember what I said to you?
That you should choose her because if you ever loved me you wouldn’t have to make any decision.
So stop pretending that you care about me now. Your indecision is a decision. And I made up my mind. I don’t want a toxic man next to me.
I don’t want a guy who can’t decide what he wants in life. I want someone who is down to earth, the one who has eyes for me only and the one who will be my support.
And all of that, I had been searching for in you but you could never provide me with it.
I was the girl you always needed the most but at the same time, I was the one you kept hurting over and over.
You couldn’t accept the fact that you had loved me once so you kept pushing me from you. In those days when you kept coming back to me, you were actually running away from me, but at that time you couldn’t realize that.
In one moment you would show me all your love and in the next, you would show your real face. You were an asshole in disguise and I was so drunk in love to buy all your shit.
And worst of all was that I was there every time you would come back.
Maybe you are a good man but you were a bad one for me.
I am just mad at myself for staying with you all this time. I couldn’t believe that you were breaking my heart piece by piece, every single day.
And I was letting you do that because I was madly in love with you. After all that we have gone through, I am sad that you broke me and that I will never recover.
But in all this pain I couldn’t believe that someone else could love me, as imperfect as I am.
Yes, I have someone new in my life. It took me so much time to realize that I wasn’t guilty of that disaster that happened to us.
I learned that even if I am broken, with the right man I can be fixed.
Maybe not completely but good enough to trust people and fall in love again.
Your first mistake was leaving me. And your second one was making me believe that I could not survive without you. So, in some way, I want to thank you for showing me that I can do way too better.
You showed me how a woman should NEVER be treated. You showed me that you weren’t the right man for me and I am glad that I finally realized that. In the end, I just want to say why I never tried to beg you not to leave me.
You see, even if I loved you with all my heart, I was proud enough to not ask you to stay with me.
The world is big and I have so much to offer. Too bad you realized that too late!
