The thing with “the wrong one” is that he doesn’t come with a warning sign attached to him.
You don’t immediately know how toxic he is and it’s easy enough to confuse him for “the one.”
The thing is, the wrong one won’t show his true face right away.
What’s even more confusing is the fact that he was perfect at the beginning of your relationship and only once you were head over heels for him, he started to change.
You couldn’t believe the transformation.
Your prince charming became a toad and that’s not how the fairytale was supposed to go.
You spent a lot of time hoping things would go back to the way they were.
You kept thinking that sweet, loving, and caring man is still somewhere inside of him.
Sadly, the truth is that man never existed.
He pretended he was something he’s not, and you fell for it.
You would never have gotten so into him if he showed his true colors in the beginning.
You would never have fallen for the crappy behavior, minimal efforts, and mind games that came afterward.
By then it was already too late – you were already in love with him.
You loved him for who you thought he was.
You loved the false image of a man he created, but that wasn’t true love. He wasn’t the one for you.
Now you are left shattered, picking up the pieces of your heart and life, trying to hold it together because he emotionally ruined you.
It hurts – it will hurt for a long time – but the best thing he could have done for you is be out of your life for good.
I know you wish it wasn’t like this, that you can just skip the bad part and get to the moment in future where you are living your happily ever after.
Unfortunately, good things don’t come easy and without the bad times, you would never grow, evolve, and become the person your soulmate will fall madly in love with.
Trust me, there will come a day in which you will be thankful that everything happened the way it did.
One day you will be able to look back and give the wrong man a big thank you because he paved the road to the right one… to the one you are supposed to spend your forever with.
The wrong one showed you what love is not and never supposed to be
He gave you warmth, then he showed you the worst coldness you ever experienced in your life.
He lowered your self-esteem and made you feel like you have to try harder to keep him in your life.
Love is never cruel and it should never be used as a weapon to manipulate someone.
Instead of appreciating and reciprocating your feelings for him, he used them against you.
His core is rotten and he was never worthy of you, not the other way around.
The wrong one taught you how to recognize the red flags
You are now more careful. You will see the signs you missed when you were with him; you won’t ignore your inner voice telling you that something isn’t right.
Someone’s constant mood swings, inconsistency, lies and controlling or abusive behavior will trigger the alarms inside of you and tell you to run as far away from that person as you humanly can.
In a way, your ex saved you from getting involved with a man like him.
The wrong one made you stronger
It won’t seem like that at first; you will be sad, confused, disillusioned on the whole idea of love.
But you will keep moving forward; you will patch yourself back up; you will start your life from scratch.
More importantly, you will learn to appreciate yourself.
You will grow in self-love; you will blossom and learn from your pain.
You will become the best version of yourself because of it.
The wrong one will make you appreciate the right one
Your forever person will be everything your ex didn’t know how to be.
He will be twice the man your ex was.
He will empower you and make you feel beautiful, accepted, and cherished.
He will be your strength – on the other hand, you’ll be his weakness.
You will be someone who helps him let his masculine guard down and show his sensitive side.
It’s like an exchange of power.
It’s reciprocity. It’s togetherness. It’s love in its purest form. It’s all you needed and never had with the wrong man.
The right one – the one – will show you what love is all about
You need a man who is respectful, trustworthy, consistent.
You need a man who makes you feel safe and cared for, and you will have that once you meet the right man.
Once you are with the one, you will see why it never worked out with anyone else.
You will be thankful because you will know that all the tears, struggles, and pain weren’t in vain.
Once you are with the one, you will have someone who will wipe away your tears and stand by your side through times of hardship.
You will have somebody who will go the extra mile to make you happy.
Now tell me, isn’t that special someone worth the wait?
Leah Lee – Writer. Dreamer. Adventurer. Eternal Optimist.
I am an English language and literature professor and writing came naturally alongside that. It was something I did for me until I decided to share it with the rest of the world.
I write about love, emotions, relationship issues and ways to solve them and most importantly about empowering women to become the best versions of themselves.
My inspiration comes from all that I’ve been through in life, and it was a bumpy road but full of valuable lessons. I hope that my experience will do some good to all of those who like to read my work.