You can’t sleep, can you? I know—you keep rolling around on your bed, haunted by memories.
There you are, thinking about all the things that could and should have been.
Of all the things you might have done differently, if you had been just a little bit smarter and wiser.
There you are, thinking about her. Thinking about the only woman who ever loved you for real.
About the woman who gave you her entire self, without asking for anything in return.
Who gave you more second chances than she could count and who only wanted for you to love her back.
About the woman who you thought would never give up on you. Until she’d finally had enough.
About the woman who you thought would never have the courage to leave your sorry ass, no matter how you treated her.
I guess there existed something you could do to make her stop loving you after all, didn’t it?
There you are, feeling all the things she felt after she finally said her final goodbye.
Missing her like hell and feeling like you will die if she doesn’t come back any time soon.
Well guess what? She won’t. She left you never to return and there is nothing you can do about it.
Remember how for years, this girl kept warning you that this moment would come, if you didn’t change your ways?
How she kept telling you that one of these days, she would close the door behind her and walk away from you for good?
And what did you do about it? Did you listen?
Did you rethink your behavior? Did you at least try to be the man she needed you to be?
No, you laughed in her face, sure about yourself.
You were convinced that these were nothing more than her empty threats and that there was nothing you should worry about.
Oh boy, how wrong you were.
Because this girl literally predicted everything that was going to happen.
She knew that at first, you wouldn’t take her seriously.
You’d expect her to come crawling back to you the moment you promised her that things wouldn’t be the same if she gave you just one more chance.
However, this time was different.
This time, none of your strategies worked and you were obviously losing her but even that wasn’t enough for you to confess your sins.
Instead, you turned to other girls, thinking that they’d fill the void she left.
Instead of looking the truth in the eye, you kept searching for her in all other women, not knowing that a girl like her can’t be found twice in a lifetime.
Then after a while, when you saw that the alcohol and the meaningless sex weren’t helping you, it hit you—you really lost her.
This girl wasn’t coming back and you were the one who let her go.
That was when you tried everything you could just to get back together with her.
This time, you weren’t even lying—you were really ready to do whatever it took just to have her forgiveness.
Nevertheless, by the time you saw what you’d done, she was long over you.
By then, she was happy without you, realizing that leaving you was actually the best thing she had ever done for herself.
By the time you realized her worth, she realized that you were the last man she needed.
She realized that you never deserved her in the first place and that she is way better without you.
So, tough break but I guess you are stuck with all of this pain you are feeling now.
I know you want me to tell you that it will go away with time but sadly, it won’t.
Instead, it will just grow bigger and bigger every time you remember that she is happy and that you are still the same douchebag you’ve always been.
Every time you remember that you chased away someone as special as her, every time you realize that no one will ever love you like she did and every time you remember you missed out on your chance of being happy.
Your scars will become deeper every time you remember that your life could have been way different, if you had just listened.
If you had just believed her threats, if you had tried just a little bit harder and if you had loved her when you should have.
