Has your ex been acting weird lately? Are you looking for some clear clues and subtle signs that your ex wants you back? If yes, you’re definitely in the right place.
You see, in many cases when a relationship ends, there is one person who doesn’t really want things to finish. The fact is that breakup always falls pretty hard for one partner. One side will be left with heartbreak in the end and that’s almost inevitable.
It often happens that one person is still feeling the same things, but unfortunately still gets rewarded with an “EX” title.
Regardless of your feelings and no matter what you do, sometimes you just can’t keep the person you want in your life the most. I know it sucks but it’s the truth.
But, they will never tell you this, and do you know why? Because they are afraid that you don’t feel the same way they do, and that is why they fear rejection.
So what’s happening is your ex is pretending to be over you.
But, not everything is black and white. (There is still hope for you.)
How Do You Know If Your Ex Wants You Back But Won’t Admit It?
To figure out if your ex misses you and wants you back, you have to pay close attention to the way they behave in your presence. Every little thing, every small detail, even the ones you think are trivial, matter way more than you think.
Pay attention to their body language because it’s undoubtedly the first thing that will expose their true feelings. They’ll reach out and want to stay in contact with you and the most awkward thing is that they’ll behave way too better than they did while you were in the relationship.
Even though your ex might be avoiding telling you directly what’s going on in their mind and that they want to get back together, they sure as hell can’t avoid showing it with their actions!
Their actions reflect their subconscious, and that’s how you can know for sure what’s on their mind.
Now, doesn’t it sound great to be able to read your ex’s mind and to know what he really wants? Imagine if you could get a quick guidebook that would tell you what your ex is thinking or feeling after your breakup.
Use The Ex Factor Guide to erase all negative emotions and create a brand new relationship with your ex.
21 Subtle Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
Here are 10 simple guidelines and telltale signs that will tell you if your ex misses you and wants you back!
Getting back in touch
If you think they are talking to you or messaging you all over again because they want to tell you how mad they are, you’re wrong.
If they were that mad, they never would’ve texted you in the first place.
The only reason behind their sudden and frequent reaching out to you again after the no contact period is that they miss you. That’s why this is one of the top 3 signs your ex secretly wants you back.
Eventually, they will switch to talking to you on a regular basis, and they will get you back to square one without you even noticing it.
They will look for the most random excuses to contact you like they suddenly remembered something about you two, they saw something that reminded them of you, or they’re suddenly interested in your day.
If it appears like you two are communicating more than you did in the relationship, then you can be sure that this is one of the biggest signs your ex wants you back.
By constantly being in touch with you, they are becoming a part of your life again which is their primary goal after all.
Actually, they’re reaching out now more than ever
It could be the case that you said, “This is the last time we will ever talk,” and you’ve ended up talking to your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend again.
If your ex wishes to have you back, they will try to get the communication going.
They will constantly have something new to say or something new to ask, and that will be their way to keep hearing from you.
The card that your ex is playing is to get you used to constant text messages and phone calls from them.
This way, it’s easier to know what you want, what you need, and what you feel. This will be the essential information needed in your ex’s mission to earn a second chance from you and win you over again.
Your providing him with the latest updates regarding your life will definitely make it easier for him to be one step ahead of the game so that he can devise a perfect plan on how to get you back and give you exactly what you need at the moment.
Recalling the old times
If you’re still in touch with your ex, that’s a big sign that things are not over between the two of you.
Another clear sign that your ex wants you back is when they recall your old, happy memories.
Usually, if your ex is trying to make you remember all the nice things you went through, it’s them waving a white flag.
Recalling the old times is surely one of the biggest signs your ex wants you back because if he doesn’t, he wouldn’t bother reminding you of any of the great things you did together.
It means they are trying to alter your perspective by helping you delete all the bad things from the past. They are giving up on fighting you.
It also means they want you to forget why you broke up in the first place.
When they make you remember all those times you laughed together or the stupid things you did that got you in trouble, they are simultaneously awakening the feeling of love you had towards them in those moments.
And once your barriers have been breached and you’ve stopped being angry, the mission your ex had is accomplished.
They’re desperate for your attention
If you noticed that your ex is trying very hard to grab your attention, it’s a pretty clear sign your ex wants you back in their life.
They might even seem a little bit desperate but that’s only because they don’t have the guts to admit that they still have strong feelings for you and that they want to get back with you.
They’ll do literally everything to capture your attention and make you see their true intentions. They won’t even care if they embarrass themselves in their pursuit.
You can put them on a little test just to see how serious they actually are about wanting to get back to you. Put on a cover of a cold-hearted person and don’t fall for their attempts to grab your attention.
Play it cool. If your ex keeps trying to get your attention even after you’ve ignored them for some time, it’s a clear sign that they’re still thinking of you and want you back.
Bringing up the ‘What if’ questions
If your ex happens to want you back, they will offer a million things that could go differently in your relationship.
They will be full of ‘what if’ questions that will make you think about your future.
By doing this, they are kinda playing with your subconscious by instilling in your brain new ideas about different possible outcomes.
They will make you think about what would’ve happened if they hadn’t made the mistakes they made, if you hadn’t pushed too hard, and God knows what else.
The only aim these questions have is to make you imagine your future together and for you to welcome your ex back in your mind.
When you change your perspective regarding your breakup, your entire mindset changes, and you no longer see things as badly as you might have.
You start blaming something or someone else for all the bad that happened which automatically brings you closer to your ex-girlfriend/boyfriend.
They want to talk about the breakup
If they say that they need to talk about your breakup just because they need that final closure, it’s perfectly normal and it doesn’t have to mean that they want you back.
On the other hand, if they ask you to meet up and talk about things that lead to your breakup, it’s a good sign they actually regret your breakup and want to rebuild your relationship.
You know what are the no-contact rules, right? It means that you shouldn’t talk, see or text each other for some period of time after the breakup.
If your ex decides to break that silence and invites you out to talk, it’s more than obvious they’re rethinking your breakup.
Unfortunately, sometimes couples choose to avoid fighting and think that it’ll help them maintain their relationship. They stop expressing their negative emotions and things that bother them and all those things just keep piling up.
One day, all those little things that were accumulated for so long explode and destroy even the strongest relationships. That’s when couples decide to end their relationship without even knowing the actual reason for that breakup.
That’s exactly why honest and open communication is the best relationship advice for maintaining a healthy relationship.
Maybe this resembles your case. Maybe you made a hasty decision about ending your relationship and now your ex has thought about it and thinks that your relationship deserves a second chance.
The only thing you can do is to accept their invitation and hear them out. Maybe there is still hope for your relationship and trust me, even the most damaged relationships can be fixed if both sides are willing to put great effort into it.
They’re drunk texting you
I truly believe in the old saying that goes like this; drunk man’s words are sober man’s thoughts. Therefore, if he/she drunk dials or texts you, it’s one of the biggest signs that your ex wants you back.
I’m sure that every relationship expert would agree that late-night-drunk calls and texts to exes are the worst things a person can do after the breakup.
Yes, you can and you should go out and have some fun if you think it’ll ease your pain, but try not to allow yourself to humiliate yourself in this way.
Drunk dials and texts are simply acts of cowardice. It means that your ex doesn’t have the guts to be open and honest with you, so they use this, so much easier method, to say how they feel about you and to soothe their soul.
I know that you probably think that you shouldn’t answer their calls or texts because it’ll make your situation even more awkward the next day, however, you’ll never find out if they have any drunken confessions to make if you don’t pick up the phone.
They’ll probably regret their drunk calls and texts when they sober up, BUT you’ll regret it even more if you don’t answer their calls or messages.
They’re all over your social media
Maybe you two broke things off on good terms and kept each other on social media, but if you notice that they are really active, something could be up.
You didn’t get as many ‘likes’ and comments from them while you were dating as you’re getting now. You feel like your ex is constantly stalking you.
You can see them checking your Instagram stories or liking your pictures on different social media or even Retweeting what you Tweeted.
If your ex wants you back, they will constantly appear in your notifications.
If your ex wants you back, they will constantly seek your new updates and be in touch with you no matter what because they can’t imagine their life without you, and they’ll do anything to win you over and remind you of their existence.
Inquiring about your love life
You two broke up and decided to go on your own, separate ways, right? So, your ex doesn’t have any right to inquire or interfere in your dating life.
Whether you’re still single or you entered into a new relationship, it’s definitely not something they should be concerned about.
My advice for you is to spice things up a little bit. Even if you didn’t still move on, you should hint that you’re seeing someone else. In fact, that can also be a great way to test if they want you back.
If that provokes a jealous outburst in them, it’s a big sign they still love you and want to get back together with you.
They let you know they’re still single
It’s one thing if they mention that their relationship status hasn’t changed since you two broke up while you’re talking, but it’s completely something different if they emphasize that they’re still single every time you two are talking.
That means they want you to know that they aren’t ready to see other people because there is no place for someone else in their heart. You’re still its one and only rightful ruler.
If they constantly bring up their singleness, it is a clear sign your ex wants you back. They clearly didn’t move on with their life and their reason is more than obvious; they still have deep and strong feelings for you.
Getting mixed signals
If your ex misses you and wants you back, they’ll probably play the hot and cold game in the beginning. They won’t actually do it on purpose, but they’ll simply be too confused and overwhelmed by a whole range of different feelings.
One day they’ll feel that they still love you the same and they’ll want to get together with you, while the next day, they’ll think that it’s all in vain and pull back.
I know this will also be overwhelming for you. You’ll both be on a real emotional rollercoaster and the ride will be very confusing and exhausting.
However, the only thing you can do in this situation is to give both of you some space and time to think about it all in peace. I’m sure that all those mixed signals will stop soon, you just need to give him some time to clear his thoughts and recognize his true feelings.
Flirting is like some kind of elixir that keeps a long-term relationship young and a long-distance relationship strong. It is one of the essential building bricks for a healthy relationship.
If your ex has started to flirt with you all of a sudden as you’ve just met, I think that you don’t need any more signs. They’ll use their charm and take their flirting abilities on a whole new level.
They’ll shower you with compliments and do different kinds of stuff for you that only a true gentleman would do.
They say they’ve been working on themselves lately
You must’ve heard the saying, “The only mission your ex has after you’ve broken up is to get better looking.” It could be the case that they are trying to look better to get someone else.
It could also be that they finally decided to take your advice and go to the gym. It may be that they finally decided to change their job or their looks.
If your ex is changing the things you didn’t like that much, that’s a really big telltale sign that they want you back.
They want to be a better person for you and also, they want to make up for their wrongdoings. They only hope that you’ll notice it and express a desire to come back to them.
Summarized, they are preparing a new terrain, so they can persuade you that it’s safe for you to come back.
They are telling you that they are working hard on themselves, and they are determined to change everything that has ever annoyed you or something you didn’t quite like on them.
Admitting the guilt
They would’ve never admitted fault. No matter what the fight was about, your ex would’ve died rather than take part of the blame.
And now that you’ve broken up, your ex has no problem with putting some of the blame on him or herself.
They admit that they were acting childish, that they didn’t treat you right, and they encourage you to blame them for everything bad that happened in your past.
By doing this, they are trying to let you know that they understand everything and are willing to change.
Maybe this is exactly what the original problem was, and maybe now you get to talk as two decent human beings.
Your ex might’ve thought everything through and realized the mistakes that were made.
There’s a good possibility that they loved you madly and still do, so when they lost you, they had the time they needed to realize their mistakes.
Now that they know what it’s like to lose you, they will make sure they never make the same mistake twice, which resulted in them finally admitting some guilt.
Talking about you to your mutual friends
Talking about you to your friends is also one of the biggest signs your ex wants you back.
It’s their sneaky way to send you a message that they want you back in their life without saying it directly.
So, they will try and constantly mention you to the friends you share or to the people who both of you hang out with sometimes.
They will mention how great you’re doing, how proud they are of you, how you were the best partner they ever had.
Your friends will tell you all of that stuff, and your ex knows it.
It’s a perfect way to stay in your life and to show you how much they care about you without being obvious (which is exactly their intention).
They want to hang out
This can be a tricky one. If your ex wants to hang out with you, it can be because they miss you and want you back. However, it can also be because they still care for you but only as a friend and want to keep that friendship.
Still, if they start inviting you out often, then I think that things are pretty clear there; they surely miss you. They miss talking and hanging with you. They miss everything about you.
Even if you two start hanging out together too often, your ex probably won’t have the guts to admit their feelings to you. They probably won’t tell you directly that they want you back.
However, they won’t be able to affect some little things like their behavior or body language when they’re around you. And those things are precisely the ones that will expose him in the end. Pay close attention.
Trying to make you jealous or remaining single?!
What is the relationship status of your ex? Did they find a new love interest and enter into a rebound relationship? Or has your ex remained single since you broke up?
If you guys dated for a long time and they remained single, it could just be so they can get some rest, to enjoy the freedom and the single life.
But if this happens along with any of the other signs listed above, then the reason why they are single is pretty obvious.
However, if they show up randomly at bars where you go with some new person on their arm (but they are never really doing it randomly), they are making you jealous.
They show off their new date, keep talking about them, keep mentioning them in front of you, but not because they’re madly in love with them.
It’s because they’re madly in love with you, and they want to see if you still care for them enough to show some jealousy.
Either way, both of these are good signs that they are either making you jealous enough to react or that your ex is waiting for you.
If there is nothing serious going on, you’re the one your ex still wants.
A very clear sign your ex wants you back is if they still can’t control their jealous outbursts when another person approaches you or starts flirting with you.
If they’re really over you, it won’t be a problem for them and they would never get jealous even if you start dating someone new. They would simply see you as a closed chapter of their life and they would move on.
The thing is that your ex didn’t stop loving you and it’s completely normal that seeing you with someone else sets them off.
Wanting to be “friends” with you
Being friends with your ex is a topic that has been discussed too many times by now.
By now, it’s not a question of whether you should or shouldn’t be—the question is whether your ex really wants to be just a friend.
There is no need to mention here that being friends with your ex almost always ends up the same way—people get back together with their exes.
And your ex wants you so badly that they are proposing something that obvious.
They could really want to have you by their side, but there’s only a slight possibility of that happening.
Mostly, exes propose to stay friends because that way they’re still in your life and getting you back is much easier.
If you suspect that this could be the case with your ex, you can be sure that their ulterior motives are somewhat different than you might have thought.
They want to stay friends with you so that they can always be in touch with you and wait for the perfect moment to let you know that they want to be more than just friends.
Spitting jokes about missing you
If your ex is making “jokes” about how they’re still thinking of you and want to get back together with you, it’s a good sign your ex wants you back. You know how that old saying goes, in every joke there is a little truth.
They probably do this to see your reaction. It’s actually how they’re trying to check if you still have feelings for them.
If they get a positive reaction from your side, they’ll probably get serious and work on winning you over again.
They admit they’re still thinking of you
Even though this isn’t very likely to happen, however, if your ex admits that they miss you and that they’re still thinking of you, it’s a clear sign they want to get back together with you.
They had some time to think during the no contact period and they’re probably dealing with regrets for breaking up with you in the first place.
The thing is that they’ve understood that they’ve made a hasty decision regarding your breakup and, of course, now they’ll try to do everything to fix the damage and get you back.
If their love is honest, they’ll try hard to prove it to you. They’ll also try hard to earn your forgiveness and to prove to you that they’re worthy of the second chance. That your relationship deserves to be given another shot.
The rest is up to you, of course. You’re the only one who needs to decide whether you’ll welcome them into your life back or you’ll shoot those doors forever. In fact, figuring out if your ex still loves you was actually an easy part, what follows is the difficult one.
You need to sit down and have a deep and very serious conversation with yourself. Do you want to get your ex back? Do you still love them? Do you think you’ll be able to have a healthy and fulfilled relationship again?
As a famous relationship coach, Jaime Bronstein, says, “Scan your life and see if there was ever a time or person you were with who made you feel happier than this person. If the answer is no, then there’s a possibility that he or she was your soulmate.”
If this is the case, if you’re sure they’re your forever person, don’t let them go no matter what.
You’ll overcome all those differences and disagreements eventually and you’ll be even happier this second time, but if you decide to say goodbye to them for good, there are great chances that you’ll never be truly happy again.
These were the biggest signs your ex wants you back but won’t admit it. I hope this small guideline will help you clear your thoughts and finally figure out if your ex wants to reconcile with you.
Now, the next question you should ask yourself is do you want to get your ex back? Is your life better with or without them in it? Is your love for them still strong and deep like it was before?
Before you decide to give another shot to your past relationship, reflect on everything that happened between you two.
The right answer is buried in your heart. You just need to dig deep down there and you’ll find it. I’m sure your mind will oppose it, but the only right thing to do for you is to listen to your heart. It’s the only path to true happiness.