A few things in the world are so intense as missing someone who means a lot to you. This someone could be your ex or someone you’ve never been with.
It’s true that you can miss someone you never dated because you created a strong mental connection with them, and they were a part of your life for some time.
Unrequited love comes in so many different forms, and each one of them is equally painful.
Such love forces you to ask yourself the following questions: Will I ever stop missing them? What should I do to stop thinking about them? How long will this agony last?
Many poets, writers, and other artists have tried to answer these questions through their poems, books, and different works of art. They weren’t actually trying to answer them, but they had this strong urge to express themselves.
They weren’t trying to stop missing someone but trying to stop the pain of missing someone, which is exactly what you need to do too!
No matter how hard you try, you CAN’T stop missing someone overnight
No, there aren’t instant solutions that will help you stop missing someone in record time. Not a single guide on earth can help you stop missing that one person overnight or in a short amount of time.
You can try the weirdest methods like convincing yourself that you don’t miss them and that you never even cared for them in the first place.
You can try it for a few minutes, hours, or a day, but eventually, you’ll get back to your initial state of mind where you still miss them A LOT.
If the person you’re trying to forget is your ex, every romantic movie or couple on the street will remind you of them.
You will be tempted to re-read all your texts, and you will analyze and overanalyze things.
Sometimes you will cry yourself to sleep and think about texting them and convincing them that MAYBE you should give your failed romance another chance.
You will drunk dial them to confess your deepest feelings that are suffocating you every second and every minute of your trying-to-stop-missing-someone life.
The next day, you will realize that you made a mistake and shouldn’t have contacted them. You’ll promise yourself that you’ll NEVER do it again and that YOU WILL stop missing them.
But did you know that all these things are part of your healing journey?
If you want to stop missing someone, first you have to go through the following stages:
At this stage, you will pretend that it’s not a big deal or that the change isn’t happening. You will try hard to convince yourself that your life is still the same with or without them. Y
ou will try hard to hide all those emotions that are bound to burst in the following stage.
You will be mad at them, yourself, and everyone around you. Your boss will be the worst person in the world, your friends will turn into villains, and the one you’re trying to forget will be the biggest source of your misery.
You will only see negative aspects in everything around you.
You will even start arguments with others only to express yourself and get rid of the emotions that have accumulated inside you due to missing someone you can’t be with.
• Bargaining (What if stage)
At this stage, you will feel extremely vulnerable and helpless. You will think of so many What-ifs where you’ll blame yourself and external factors for the outcome.
If you were in a relationship with them, you might think: If only I had made more effort, maybe they would have stayed.
If you’ve never even been with them, you might think: If only I initiated contact more often, maybe we would have gone on a date, and things would have been different.
If only, what if…
You may isolate yourself from the rest of the world. You may feel confused, anxious, enraged…
At one point, you will feel worthless without them, or you’ll see them as a missing piece in your life that no one will be able to replace in the future.
If you’re missing them even though you’ve never been together, you will also go through stages of depression but in a different way.
You will mostly blame yourself for not trying harder to overcome all the obstacles between you or not letting them know how you feel about them.
From denial to bargaining, you will come to acceptance which is not necessarily a positive stage. You can accept something that happened without moving on.
As already said, you can’t stop missing someone overnight because it is a process. After accepting it, you will be in the process of forgetting them.
Give yourself time
If you miss them and you know you shouldn’t, don’t worry and don’t be so hard on yourself. Give yourself time to accept what happened (or didn’t happen).
At the risk of sounding like the biggest cliché ever, the truth is the following: Time heals everything.
When I think about my last failed romance, I vividly remember how broken I felt after the breakup. I thought that I would probably be the only person in the world who doesn’t move on with her life, not even 10 years after my breakup.
I’ve realized that’s what everyone thinks when they find themselves missing someone they are no longer with or cannot be with.
The only thing we can focus on is that intense feeling of something that’s missing or something that has never even been there but should have been.
You might feel like no one understands how you’re feeling, but I assure you that time does. Give yourself time and allow everything to happen at its natural pace.
Take a deep breath. Live in the moment. Express yourself
How do you stop missing someone? How do you live in the moment when the only thing you can focus on is THEM?
No, it won’t be easy. You will be tempted a million and one times to text them before you completely discard that foolish idea. You will think of them more than there are seconds in a day before you start focusing on things other than them.
But yes, you can do it. How do I know? Because I did it, my friends did it, and other people did it. Take a deep breath and focus on the things in front of you.
Express yourself, go for a walk, watch that romantic movie and cry it all out if you must.
Heck, feel free to scream even if your apartment is not soundproof. You have every right to tell the world exactly how you are feeling (this doesn’t include punching someone in the face or other aggressive attempts).
If you want to stop missing someone, don’t hold these intense feelings inside you! By expressing them in various ways, you’ll feel more and more FREE.
If you’re having a hard time expressing yourself or understanding your emotions, dive into the realm of emotional quotes about missing someone.
Absorb them, let them fill you with nostalgia and sadness, which will be converted into acceptance and healing.
Remember, you won’t stop missing someone as long as you’re trying hard to do so.
You’ll stop missing them once you stop trying to do so!
Once you accept the fact that they are no longer a part of your life (or they never were) and stop trying to change the course of your outcomes, you’ll stop missing them.
Once you stop fighting your emotions and start acknowledging them, you’ll stop missing them.
It won’t be easy, but you will do it because you can.
You’ll stop missing them not because you want to but because it will come to you naturally with your biggest friend – TIME.