Some men have the wrong idea about what it is that women want in a man. What they believe women want and what women actually want are sometimes two completely different things.
The reason for this is that a lot of guys believe that there are certain attractive traits that will impress women, so they behave in a way they assume women will like. Actually, this is exactly what no woman wants: someone who acts a certain way to get something from her.
Some men believe that it’s the richest guy, the most jacked dude, or the biggest boss who’s going to be the most attractive and have his choice of women to pick from. In reality, men are the ones who appreciate these things much more – most women want a genuine man.
If you want to know what it is women really want, here are the top 10 things that attract a woman to a man.
Top 10 Things That Attract A Woman To A Man
The way a man acts will greatly influence the kind of woman he attracts – the behavior women find attractive in men reflects the way they are.
If you’re a man who pretends to be someone he’s not to get women, you’ll attract women who pretend to like you to get something from you. If you’re trying to attract women with money, you’ll find women who are attracted to your money.
Those kinds of relationships might be fun in the short term, but when all is said and done, it’s not enough. Everyone wants someone to love them for who they are – a caring, loyal and supportive partner. So how do you attract that kind of woman? By being a truly attractive man.
The things men do to attract women are all about trying to appear attractive, but the top 10 things that attract a woman to a man are qualities that actually are attractive.
1. Passion
Living your life in a way that you give your best to everything you do is what makes every moment count. True passion lies in showing what you care about without holding back, in having goals and working towards them. A man with values and conviction is the kind of man women are attracted to.
Women want a man who’s building the kind of life that he wants to live. He knows what he wants for himself and works hard to become who he wants to be. He doesn’t do it for anyone else – not for society, not for his family, not for women – he invests in himself for himself.
A man with a purpose is attractive. Having interests that he pursues proves that he’s a man who doesn’t live his life carelessly. A truly passionate man does things with sincerity: not out of anger, not ironically, not just to get them over with, but because he believes in doing them.
2. Vulnerability
Vulnerability is what makes you human in the eyes of a woman. When a man is vulnerable with a woman and shows her his sincere emotions and true personality, it builds an emotional connection and trust between them.
A woman is attracted to a man who acts like himself at all times and doesn’t try to be someone he’s not to impress her. He’s attractive because he chooses to stay authentic to his true self and dares to show it. The ability to admit his mistakes and own up to them shows that he learns from his mistakes and doesn’t hide.
Being vulnerable takes great strength and courage because it gives the other person the power to hurt you. A man who’s honest about his flaws gives you the power to use them and the trust not to, and this makes him attractive.
3. Sense of humor
Why is a good sense of humor considered such an attractive trait in a man? The reason is that when a guy is funny, it says a lot of things about him.
It shows his intelligence: making a genuinely funny joke takes brains. It shows that he can command attention, and people pay attention and listen to him talk. It shows his social skills and makes him approachable. A funny guy is an attractive guy.
A man with a sense of humour is very desirable to women for another important reason that can’t be ignored: he makes her laugh. Laughing together is a precious experience. It relieves stress, makes a relationship fun, and helps people bond.
A man pretending he’s amused by something just to make a woman laugh isn’t going to cut it. It’s insincere, and a woman won’t react to it the way he wants her to. Instead, if he tells her a joke he thinks is genuinely funny, she’ll love it.
4. Competence
Women love a man who’s good at things he does. It’s not important what those things are, as long as it’s something he has invested time and effort into and become good at. This is attractive because it shows that he’s ready to work for something he cares for and to improve himself.
It’s not only intelligence women find attractive – it’s skill. Knowing that a man can work at something hard enough to become good at it says a lot about his character. It shows that he’s someone who perseveres, overcomes hurdles, and has his eye on a goal.
Women are attracted to a competent man because he pursues his talents and invests time in the things he cares about. Because it’s possible to know so much about a man from the fact that he’s really good at something, it’s no wonder it’s one of the things that attracts a woman to a man.
5. A kind heart
Real men are kind. There’s a quote that says, “kindness is love in action,” and it’s true. Kindness can be seen in any action whose purpose is to make someone’s life a little easier, a little better. Kindness is a soft smile and a helping hand. A kind man loves.
Women like kind men because his kindness shows that he’s gentle, compassionate, loyal, and selfless. These are all qualities that any woman wants in a man with whom she would consider spending her life. Being truly kind, or striving to be, makes him attractive.
At the core of kindness is choice – the choice to be kind instead of choosing indifference or being unkind. A man can show his kindness in many ways: from volunteer work to owning a pet to small everyday acts of kindness, and each of them tells you that he’s a man who decides to care.
6. Confidence
What’s more attractive than self-confidence? Confidence in your own value, your qualities, and wants exude strength and conviction.
A confident man doesn’t look for validation because he knows his worth and doesn’t need anyone else to acknowledge him. Even though he doesn’t need it, it’s hard for women not to believe in a man who believes in himself.
Women like a man who asks for what he wants, but if he doesn’t get it, he’s okay with it. He won’t insist, beg, or pressure. Being assertive is different from being demanding or needy. Confidence makes you daring, but it doesn’t make you pushy. A man who’s confident but not arrogant has modesty and doesn’t advertise his value. His behavior does it for him.
It’s easier for a confident man to have good conversation skills because he doesn’t shy away from honest communication and has something to say. Women are attracted to a man they can talk to, who shows interest in them, and has things to share about himself.
7. Respect
Men who think that men like guys who treat them badly don’t understand that they treat them badly as well only in ways they don’t realize. Women don’t like men who criticize and judge, but men who accept and support them.
A woman wants a long-term relationship with a man who sees her as his equal and respects her. It’s attractive when a man shows a woman that he respects her and takes things that are important to her seriously – her choices, her opinions, and her feelings.
Being respectful and tolerant towards other people is as important, especially those who are obligated to treat him with respect in a certain situation. A man who disrespects a server is not a respectful man. Respect also includes good manners and being polite. No woman wants a man who insults her and puts her down.
8. Attentiveness
People pick who they spend their time with by how they make them feel. Women are attracted to men they like to be around, so a man showing her attention and care will keep her interest.
A man shows his attention by being aware and fully present. When spending time together, he doesn’t get distracted by his phone, other people, etc. In communication, he’s mindful of her feelings and shows he cares. His conduct is gentle and appreciative.
When a man is genuinely interested in a woman, he becomes instantly more attractive. Being genuine is key here – women don’t like a man who nods at every little thing she says and pretends to care. Women want a man who really pays attention, shares his own thoughts and beliefs and isn’t afraid of challenging her.
9. Charm
Charm is hard to define. Charm is what makes people exceptionally likable and attractive to others. Charming people draw you in with their energy and personalities, and like with most things, what makes it work is that they’re always genuine. Women love being around men who exude charm.
A charming man lights up a room and makes people feel good about themselves. He cracks jokes without being self-deprecating and never at someone’s expense. He pays people compliments with sincerity and not ulterior motives – he wants to tell someone he likes something about them, not make them like him back. He makes people smile when they’re in his presence.
So how can you be charming? You should be empathetic and strive to have a positive influence on other people’s lives. If you need practice, start with people you see every day who could use some cheering up. Find something nice to say about them, but it’s important that you really mean it.
10. Appearance
Women are attracted to men they find both endearing and sexy. To be endearing, show her your authentic, unfiltered, and vulnerable self as it is. This takes courage and trust.
To be physically attractive, on the other hand, is much easier. When it comes to physical attraction, appearance is important. It’s what leaves a good first impression when you meet someone and sometimes has a lasting effect.
Being good-looking is easier than it seems – all it takes is a bit of work. It has nothing to do with having certain physical traits and everything to do with how you show that you put in the effort in the way you present yourself.
How to look better
When a woman looks at a man’s face, she’s not looking for specific physical features but signs that he takes care of himself.
Whether or not you have facial hair isn’t important – what matters is that it’s groomed and not neglected. It’s not the color or shape of your eyes that make her blush – it’s eye contact and your personality shining through.
When it comes to a man’s body, women care less about muscles and more about posture and bearing.
Open body language is much more attractive than a specific body part. You can wear t-shirts or suits, but if either is dirty or wrinkly, you’re not showing that you’re putting in the effort to look good.
To sum up, a man looks good when he practices self-care and is mindful of his health. Women notice and appreciate this. Grooming, scent, and a gentle voice are instant upgrades in looks. Add a warm smile, and he becomes more attractive to women than he thinks.
3 Things Women Find Unattractive In Men
Now that you know what things women find attractive, let’s talk about the turn-offs that most women share.
These are things men do that not only make women lose any interest they had in a man in the first place but make women not want to give him the chance to get to know her at all.
1. Neediness
A needy man is extremely unattractive. Being needy means depending on others to give you validation and meet your needs. It means being motivated to do things to get something from others. He thinks he’s a nice guy, but women don’t want a nice guy – women want a good man.
This is the kind of man who’ll call a woman repeatedly if she doesn’t reply after they go on a first date. He doesn’t know how to accept defeat and take no for an answer. He believes that his persistence in going after her is flattering when it’s only desperate.
He only does things to impress women and needs validation from them. He masks his personality traits, hides his flaws, and isn’t willing to accept criticism or rejection. He lies to make himself look better. He either puts women on a pedestal or considers them inferior to himself.
He wants to be in control of how he’s perceived, which is the opposite of the authenticity and vulnerability that is so attractive to women.
2. Entitlement
A selfish and egoistic man often has expectations of what your interactions should look like and gets frustrated when you go off-script. He believes that women owe him something just for existing and doesn’t feel the need to give back.
For example, he wants a beautiful woman, yet he doesn’t accept that women also want a good-looking man. He looks for excuses and believes it’s his lack of good looks that push women away when it’s really his behavior. He doesn’t take care of himself and expects to be accepted as he is, but he’d never pursue a woman whose looks he doesn’t like.
This type of guy believes he’s confident when he’s actually arrogant. He shows off the things he has or has accomplished to impress, not to share his happiness. He uses pickup lines and tries to attract women with games and tricks. He plays nice, but the first time you tell him you’re not interested, he gets mad.
Needless to say, until a man like this accepts that women don’t have to like him and that he has to treat them as equals, he won’t be able to find someone who wants him for who he is.
3. Disrespect
Men who disrespect women do it because they don’t consider women as equals. They lie, are mean and rude, and they don’t take women seriously.
When disrespectful men want to attract a woman, they lie and try to make themselves look better by pretending they’re something they’re not. No matter if he’s acting like a too-cool guy who plays hard to get or a sweet talker who doesn’t mean it when men put on masks to get women’s attention, it doesn’t end in a happy relationship.
Another way men show disrespect is when they try to trick women into liking them. Using pick-up artist techniques is easy to see through and an immediate turn off.
Being mean, rude, and judgmental is another form of disrespect. Putting a woman down in casual ways, such as criticizing her clothes and make up is as annoying as when he criticizes her life choices and values. Men like this are often know-it-alls and always competing with women they’re trying to attract.
What Happens Next?
If you’ve learned anything from going over the top 10 things that attract a woman to a man, I hope it’s the knowledge that what women really want is a good man who works on himself, and they like to be around.
That’s the important thing, really. No matter if you’re an older man or a young adult, if you have a high-paying job or if you’re between jobs, if you’re classically handsome or the boy next door. It all comes down to being a man who lives his life in an authentic way and doesn’t play games to impress women.
When you’re a genuine and kind man who treats women with respect, the woman attracted to your energy is your potential mate – your equal and your partner – loving, nurturing, and supportive. Isn’t that what you want?
