If you asked ten women to think of the first thing they notice in a man, you’d probably get eight or nine different answers. But is it really that complicated to find out what attracts a woman to a man at first sight?
Every woman will give you a different answer because no two women are the same, so each one is drawn to different things and different qualities. Some of them like nerdy guys, others like sporty guys; there are those who like cute guys and those who prefer the serious type.
But all women have one thing in common: they all like a genuine guy who makes the most of what he has and whose company they enjoy. Here’s how you can become a man who’s attractive to women at first sight.
What Attracts A Woman To A Man At First Sight?
The type of person someone finds attractive depends on their taste, dating history, age, sexual preferences, lifestyle – everything you can think of influences what we’re attracted to.
Most people aren’t so superficial as to be attracted to nothing but looks, but even to those who are, there’s always something that makes one good-looking person more attractive than another.
What attracts a woman to a man at first sight? Women like men who have that “something” that’s difficult to put into words, but what is it? It’s a combination of qualities that together create a whole that’s more than the sum of its parts and lead to magnetic attraction between two people.
The good news is, most of those qualities are something a man can work on and improve. So let’s dive in.
Let’s get it out of the way: your face is the make-or-break quality when it comes to attraction. The first thing a woman notices about a guy is his face. If she likes your face, you’re halfway there.
So how not to get eliminated because of your face? You’re born with it, and short of going under the knife, what can you do with it? You can show her the person behind the face. If your face isn’t immediately attractive to her, you’ll have to get her to give you a second glance.
Why is your face the most important thing?
Think about a girl you like – her face is probably the first thing that comes to mind. Is her face cute, or elegant, or striking, or does she have that girl-next-door kind of look? It’s not unusual to like a girl’s features, but the reason why you prefer her face is that it leaves a certain impression.
Girls notice your face because it speaks about who you are. Features alone aren’t what makes a girl like a guy, but the impression his face makes.
What if there’s a discrepancy between what you’re like and what your face looks like? Do you have a resting angry face, but you wouldn’t hurt a fly?
If this is the case, you can relax your face or smile more or try to cure your expressionless look somehow, but it’s better to be yourself and give women the benefit of the doubt that they won’t judge you until they get to know you.
If your face doesn’t immediately show off your qualities, let her know what you’re like in other ways.
A smile can change a scary face into a kind one, but if it’s not genuine, it can also make you look even scarier. So don’t fake a smile! There’s nothing more inviting than a real, warm smile.
The sight of a dimple can make a girl feel the butterflies in her stomach and twirl her hair while smiling back at you. Even if you think your smile is goofy, don’t suppress it. When you smile, you become more attractive, but also smiling makes you feel happier.
The key to a winsome smile is that it must be inspired by your real feelings. The smile that makes all the ladies swoon is one that makes your eyes scrunch, glittering with joy, the corners of your mouth lifting helplessly as you look at her. A fake smile makes you look like 😬️
It doesn’t have to be a huge, toothy smile, but it has to come from the heart. How to achieve that? Be present in the moment. Enjoy being where you are. Look at her and feel grateful that you get to do so. Feel happy in your skin – you’re an attractive guy who likes his life and there’s an amazing woman in front of you.
Women immediately notice your eyes because that’s where it’s all happening: your mood, your feelings, your thoughts; it’s all in your eyes. Your eyes tell her what you’re like and reveal your personality more than anything else.
Have you ever wondered why some people seem cold and others seem inviting and friendly? Even if she can’t tell what’s so magnetic about your eyes, she’ll be drawn to them if you let your eyes show who you are.
Eye contact is where emotional attraction starts. When you look into her eyes, you show her what you feel and what you want. She’s drawn to the person she sees in your eyes. Attraction is not about the shape or the color of your eyes but about what looking into your eyes reveals to her.
You only get one chance at a first impression, and you never know when the girl of your dreams will come around the corner. If you always look your best, you don’t risk blowing your one chance of making her fall for you.
I’m not saying that you should wear your best clothes all the time or always have perfect hair. What I mean is that you should consistently take care of your grooming so that you’re never a mess. Women want guys who take care of themselves.
Looking your best means different things to different people, but 10 out of 10 women agree that cleanliness is necessary.
Basics of self-care
This is basic, so I hope you already know, but being a rugged, smelly guy isn’t attractive. Shower daily. Always wear clean clothes. Take care of your teeth meticulously.
Some women like beards, others prefer a clean-shaven look, but they all like it when you take care of your facial hair. Keep it tidy. Trim your nails and take care of your skin.
Rid yourself of the idea that skincare is just for women. To keep your skin healthy, at least use a cleanser and moisturizer daily, and if you want to make yourself look good – and feel good! – include other products as well.
Being thorough about your grooming will make you look better, but it will also make you learn to appreciate yourself more. Self-care raises self-esteem, and when you look at yourself in the mirror and know that you’ve made an effort, it will give you confidence.
5. Sexy details
There are a few little things women notice about men that aren’t crucial when it comes to attraction but that make a guy extra sexy. These little details contribute to his sex appeal, but they’re really just a cherry on top.
In other words, if a guy is obnoxious and disrespectful, they won’t give him any points, but if he’s a good guy who makes an effort, they can catapult him to the next level of attractiveness.
This could have been included in the grooming section, but it’s separate because it’s a step above basic self-care and something women specifically find attractive in a man. A man who smells good can really make a woman swoon.
When a guy has a sexy scent, a girl notices it immediately. Find a cologne or perfume you like and up your sexiness game by leaps and bounds! Just please don’t forget that, in the case of scent, less is more, so go easy and be subtle.
Hair is one of the things women notice as soon as they see a guy. Some women don’t care about what your hair looks like exactly and others have strong preferences, but all of them notice whether or not you’re taking care of your hair.
A hairstyle that suits you, is well-maintained and cared for, contributes a great deal to the impression you make. Even if that hairstyle is no hair at all, if you carry it with confidence and keep it neat, your hair – or lack thereof – is a part of your style and vibe.
Guys, I don’t know if this is a secret we’re keeping from you or if you know, but your hands make girls bite their lips and wonder how those hands feel. You can be sure that a woman will notice your hands even before your first date.
Your hands can be big or small, soft or rough, elegant or stubby – there are as many preferences as there are girls, but trust me when I say that girls are going to like your hands regardless of their type. Keep your fingernails clean and let her see your hands, and that’s it!
Girls love guys with sexy voices and the way you sound contributes to your attractiveness more than you might think. Just think of someone with a remarkable speaking voice and think about what impression they would make if they talked in a completely different way.
How to have a sexy voice? Control your volume, slow down, relax. Don’t gasp for air – make a pause when you run out of breath. You don’t need to pretend that your voice is deeper or smoother than it is; just use your voice intentionally.
Personality traits are a crucial part of attraction, but it would be false to ignore that physical attraction is important in the same amount. Both of these types of attraction can be improved if you work on yourself, so don’t worry if you’re not happy with your physical features.
Lots of men have the wrong picture of what girls find attractive when it comes to a guy’s body. A square-jawed, beefy GQ hunk or whatever other stereotype men believe women are attracted to has nothing to do with the kind of guy most women are drawn to.
Women prefer regular guys who treat them well. That’s all there is to it.
Of course, women like guys who look good and take care of their bodies, but you don’t have to be a fitness model to be attractive. If you respect your body and treat it well, it shows not only in the way you look but also in your posture and the way you carry yourself.
Take care of your appearance as much as you can and women will be interested in you. As I mentioned in the beginning, it’s all about the effort.
Height. A sore subject for many men. The never-ending discussion people are always obsessing over. I’m sure you’ve heard a variation of “If you’re under 6’, don’t apply.” Height is to men what weight is to women: the one thing people feel it’s okay to hate on.
So let me tell you the same thing I tell chubby girls who have been told they’d be cute if they lost a little weight: if you like someone and they tell you that this one thing matters more than everything else about you, that person would be wrong for you even if you were thinner or taller.
I included height as something women notice because of the reason why they notice it.
Why are some women only attracted to tall guys?
The standard answers you’ll hear are: because his size makes him seem physically stronger and more capable of protecting them, so they feel safe. Or, they like to feel delicate and feminine next to their men.
But let me tell you the truth. Most girls who only like guys taller than themselves believe in stereotypes. She’s been taught that the guy is supposed to be taller than the girl, and she’s not questioning it.
A girl who has a very strict preference for tall guys isn’t thinking about you as an individual. It has far less to do with sexual attraction than it seems.
So don’t let your height stop you from approaching a woman. If you’re a similar height to hers, taller or shorter, go for it. If she rejects you for something as superficial as your height, it’s her loss and you’ve dodged a bullet.
If your height is a deal-breaker, what are this girl’s priorities? You don’t need that in your life.
Obviously, a guy in a wrinkled t-shirt and stained jeans that don’t fit him well can hardly be attractive, but there’s no need to wear a suit everywhere you go or only own designer pieces. You can do your own thing as long as you follow the bare minimum of style: clean, maintained clothes that fit you well.
If you’re rolling your eyes because you’re already there and beyond, then you know the impact your style can have and the impression it makes. Your clothes aren’t there only to keep you warm and non-naked; they also send a message.
Your outfit advertises who you are. Your dressing sense is how you present yourself to the world. A woman can tell a lot from your clothes, so it’s natural that they are crucial in attraction.
When a woman looks at you, she can tell from your outfit how much effort you put into self-care and presentation; whether you want to be perceived as cool, trendy, approachable, professional, strict, stylish, etc.
So carefully consider your style and the message you want it to convey – it can be just the thing you need to become more attractive.
What’s your vibe? A vibe is a general impression you leave. The first time a woman sets her eyes on you, she won’t notice any details about you unless they’re very prominent, but she’ll be able to say what vibe you give off.
Even if it sounds very vague, a guy’s vibe is one of the things that attract a woman to a man. Generally speaking, it’s the energy you give out, the way you affect others and the kind of person you seem to be at first sight.
Your vibe can be positive, negative or neutral, and not everyone is drawn to the same one. For example, when someone meets you, they might say you seem friendly, serious, cool, angry or creepy. Some people are drawn to someone who’s chill, while others are more attracted to someone who’s energetic.
Needless to say, your vibe can be the complete opposite of what you’re like, but you can work on changing that. To send more positive vibes, start with positive thinking. This might sound like nonsense, but try it out.
Positive thinking includes gratitude for everything you have in your life, not overplaying or downplaying your achievements and being too modest or arrogant, being mindful of the present moment and finding something positive in every situation.
10. Body language
A man’s body language gets a woman’s attention because it’s the best indicator of how he feels about himself, about her and about the situation. Even if she’s unaware of the meanings of certain body language signs, she’ll still be able to read him because body language is universal.
If you stand tall using confident body language, you’ll leave a much different impression than if you’re slouching and looking at your feet. If you’re facing away from her and never glance at her, she won’t be able to notice your interest in her. If you’re tapping your foot and looking at your watch, she’ll think you don’t want to be there.
A lot has been written about body language of attraction, and it can’t hurt to learn a little bit about it. Here are the body language signs she likes you to start you off, and continue exploring this topic if it catches your interest.
11. Sense of humor
Are you shocked that this is included on the list? Of course not. It’s common knowledge that a good sense of humor is sexy, but what to do if you’re not funny? How to make her laugh and make her eyes sparkle when you’re not witty and capable of clever comebacks?
• The first step to developing a funny bone is figuring out what makes you laugh. Is it slapstick? Do you like unexpected twists? What’s your favorite funny movie? Is it puns that get you going?
• Next, try to find something funny in every situation. For example, if you spill your drink, you can get angry and embarrassed or you can laugh about it. Think about why that situation might be funny.
• Don’t think that it’s necessary to have well-crafted jokes to be funny. Just keep building on the situation and continue looking at it in a relaxed way. Every time a guy has made me laugh until I cried was with a single word that made the whole silly situation come full circle.
• Don’t take yourself seriously. This is really important if you want to be funny. Ego will sap all humor out of the conversation, but if you’re ready to laugh at your expense, people will laugh with you, not at you.
You also need to realize that being funny isn’t about laughing at other people and feeling superior. If your sense of humor is about stereotypes and prejudice, you should invest time in thinking about why this is so. I assure you that no woman finds sexist jokes funny.
Don’t believe what you’re told by guys who can’t get girls – women don’t prefer jerks. If you placed two identical guys in front of any woman and one of them was kind and the other treated them like dirt, she wouldn’t pick the mean one.
Kindness makes you more attractive. Don’t confuse kindness with niceness, though. Being nice doesn’t always mean being kind, and guys who like to brag about being nice often expect something in return.
Sincerity in what you do and how you approach her is another attractive quality to have. Do your best at everything and pour your heart in it to let the beauty of your personality shine. Dishonesty is one of the personality traits that are turn-offs for all women.
Have manners and show respect, don’t judge her and others and adopt a positive attitude for a massive upgrade in attractiveness – showing what’s inside makes you sexier.
Do we even have to say that confidence is a quality that women find attractive? Confident men are interesting to women because they aren’t afraid. A lack of confidence stems from feeling like somehow you’re not good enough for something you want to do.
To build your confidence, first get to know yourself and learn to like yourself. Then be authentic and passionate and live your life the way you want to live it. Your mental health will improve and your attractiveness will skyrocket as soon as you realize that you’re as valuable and worthy as everyone else.
The other side of the coin is arrogance. Avoid tipping over into entitlement and feeling better than others because that’s even more off-putting than a lack of self-esteem.
Do you remember back in the intro how I mentioned that women fall for men whose company they enjoy? Well, this is it.
Make her feel good, and she’ll be attracted to you. If you show interest in a woman and make her feel good around you, she’ll be more attracted to you than if you were playing cool and ignoring her. Trying to impress women is far less effective than trying to get to know them.
A lot of things men can do to make women comfortable are related to communication skills. Give her your attention, think before you speak, listen to what she has to say, ask her thoughtful questions, engage her in interesting conversations.
Don’t act arrogant or be needy, don’t try to get her interested using some game. Flirt with her playfully and compliment her honestly. Be genuine and attentive. Be upfront about your intentions and emotionally available. Share your feelings and thoughts and don’t ignore hers.
So can you sum up on your own what attracts a woman to a man at first sight? The whole article was an elaboration of what I told you in the beginning: be genuine, make an effort and make her feel good. If you do those three things, your dating life will improve enormously.