My friend approached me recently all excited and happy. “We are finally going out!”, she said. In between those words and her subtle anxiety, I already knew what question was coming up. She wanted tips on how to attract and impress him.
Well, that’s a piece of cake, I thought! I tried to remember all my first dates and conversations with my friends when we were all bubbly and giggling (yes, you heard that right) because of a woman.
I asked her what women think men notice first in them and I hate to break it to you, but you got it all wrong! She thought makeup, hairstyle, and some little details were what men noticed first. I think we were both shocked by things said in this conversation.
If I am being honest, we couldn’t care less if you put your pink blush and red lipstick on or have those two strands of hair dangling in front of your face.
I don’t want to brag but my friend listened to my tips and she secured herself another date! So, if you are interested in what shocked her, stay with me and hear this out!
1. Be optimistic around us!
I think this is desirable when it comes to people in general. The first thing you notice about someone even if they didn’t say a word is their vibe.
I was once going out with a woman who never stopped talking about her work problems. I mean she just complained all the time about how hard life is and I would just stop listening halfway. You got it right, it didn’t work out well!
Don’t be one of those women who carry darkness wherever they go! Try to be positive and don’t complain too much. We love to hear you out, but constant complaining can be pretty draining.
2. Talk like a boss, act like a boss!
I know we often say we want to be the one wearing the pants in a relationship. But I have to be honest, I wouldn’t mind if a woman acted a bit bossy around me. I think the male gaze would agree. It’s attractive when you show that side of yourself!
Just show him what you are capable of and that you know your worth. Let him see you’re direct and that you know what you want.
Some men (read: boys) might be intimidated by your confidence, but you wouldn’t want a man who’s scared of you anyway, right?
3. We want to be spoiled too!
I know this goes against societal norms but it’s exactly why women wouldn’t expect it. I like a woman who can care for me when I’m sick or cook my favorite meal to surprise me. To be honest, this is how I fell in love with my girlfriend.
Another thing I always notice is how women I go out with treat other people, their friends and family, as well as strangers. No one likes rude women and those who think they are above everyone else. Don’t you agree?
4. Stop thinking and just smile!
No, we don’t remember what was the color of your lipstick. However, we will definitely remember if you were happy or not!
When a woman smiles I immediately know that she’s comfortable not only with me but also in her own skin. And that’s incredibly attractive!
5. Show us your style!
If you now asked me something about fashion and if that blouse goes well with your trousers, I would be damned if I knew! However, we all love it when a woman knows how to dress appropriately.
Your way of dressing can tell us a lot about your personality so don’t be afraid to show it off! When you dress how you normally would, you will be more confident and we will notice that.
6. We love women who are nerds!
Men like women who generally know a lot about different topics so we can talk to you about anything. Don’t be shy, share your random fun facts with us!
Now be aware that there is a very thin line between showing you are smart and being a smarty-pants.
My friend had (notice the past tense) a girlfriend who would always correct everyone and just act like she knew everything better than anyone else. This would happen every time we would all hang out together. Let me tell you something, no one liked that girl.
7. Let us see your witty side!
We may come for the pretty girl, but we’ll stay for the witty girl. Next time you are on a date, tell a joke, something funny or embarrassing that happened to you. Laughter can connect you even more and show him how fun you are to be around.
Even though these are the basic things we like in women, keep in mind that everyone is different and hence will be attracted to different things.
What is true in every case is that a real man will love you exactly for who you are, so don’t change yourself to attract him. Always be yourself, it’s what makes you unique.