The friendzone is what everyone is so scared of and it’s usually referred to as something negative.
But sometimes it’s necessary for us to avoid hurting the feelings of someone we truly like only as a friend because we don’t get to choose with whom we fall in love.
We have no power over our heart and we all know the pain of loving someone who never loved us back.
That’s the reason we are so desperately trying to save someone from heartbreak by putting them into the friendzone.
Yes, it sucks balls but unrequited feelings tend to ruin a friendship.
The only way to save the friendship is the friendzone and if it’s done properly, it works.
So, if you clicked here, you are already wondering if your friend is developing feelings for you that are more than friendly.
Keep on reading to find out how to friendzone a guy when he won’t take the hint.
But what if we are not sure if feelings are there? What if we are still kind of hoping we can remain friends without all of this mess with friendzoning? Knowing the truth is quite easy.
There are a few basic signs you need to look for in order to find out the truth if your guy friend is into you. Firstly, one of them is body language.
He can tell you that there are no feelings but his body will show you the truth.
If he is leaning closer to you when you are together and if he is mirroring your movements, they are signs.
Also, he will look for any excuse to touch you ‘accidentally’, either to move your hair from your face or touch your back or arm while talking; the point is that he is trying to be physical to test your reaction.
He is not still sure about all of this, so he will use any excuse to check the way you react to him. Unfortunately, men tend to misread the signs.
Another sign to look for is if he is nervous around you. If you are friends, there wouldn’t be any reason for him to be nervous, right? Well, the thing is that he wants to be more than just friends.
He is trying to talk himself up and be the best version of himself for you, which is why there is pressure, which makes him nervous.
He’s also trying to hide the fact that he is in love with you and fails spectacularly. And of course, he compliments you.
It’s one thing to tell someone a dress looks good on them and that they look amazing but if he is giving you unique compliments, such as loving the way your eyes light up and the way your freckles show up in the sun, it means that he is noticing the small things because he is into you. He notices them because he is constantly looking at you.
If you found your friend in any of these signs and your gut is already telling you that he wants something more, then it’s time you decide whether you want him in the friendzone or you want to cut him off for good.
If you choose the friendzone, check the list and find out how to friendzone a guy.
1. Make sure your feelings are clear
It’s not easy putting someone into the friendzone. It takes patience and strength, so make sure your feelings are clear before you do anything.
Make sure that there is not even the slightest bit of feelings toward him that could turn into romantic ones.
The easiest way to do this is to imagine yourself in a relationship with him.
If you can imagine yourself with him, if you can imagine the future by his side, give yourself time to think about it.
There’s no point in putting him in the friendzone if there is the possibility you will fall for him.
You will only end up hurting yourself in the end and confusing the shit out of him.
But if you are positively, absolutely sure you don’t want him as a boyfriend, go for it.
2. Play oblivious
If he is interested in you in any way, he will throw flirtatious comments your way.
He will probably compliment you on how amazing you are, how you are the only one he wants to spend his time with. He will go out of his way to do you favors, just to make you happy.
The only way to deal with this, if you’re not interested in leading him on, is to dodge any comments and connotations about the two of you becoming an item.
If he’s offering you any help and favors, politely refuse. This way, you will avoid him getting his hopes up, thinking that you’re accepting his help because you want him around.
Men tend to use favors as a way of buying your love, so make sure he doesn’t get to buy yours.
If he’s giving you any compliments, thank him for them and change the subject.
Don’t give him any chance of turning that compliment into a saga about his feelings.
Men are quite insecure, especially when they are in love with someone who is their friend.
And opening up is especially hard in those cases, and the same goes for compliments.
Once he mans up and tells you how amazing he thinks you are, he could easily confess his feelings as well if you don’t cut him off in time.
And if he’s making any jokes about the two of you getting into a relationship, use humor to get away.
The whole idea of this friendzone thing is to keep him from hurting, which is where humor comes in handy.
Laugh away the idea and tell him how he’s the best friend you have, that you would never let any relationship ruin what the two of you have.
3. Call him ‘dude’ and ‘bro’
The way we speak to people reflects the way we feel about them. If you’re using pet names only the two of you have and call him cute nicknames, there is a huge possibility he will get his hopes up.
Maybe he even developed feelings for you because he feels accepted and he thinks you feel the same.
Avoid any cute nicknames and pet names—instead call him ‘bro’ or ‘dude’, letting him know where the two of you stand.
Men call other men ‘dude’ and ‘bro’, because they’re friends and brothers in a way.
Make yourself appear as one of the men, like one of his friends, by avoiding any terms of endearment.
And, well, there’s nothing that screams louder that you are in the friendzone than calling someone ‘buddy’ or ‘dude’. And this one goes both ways.
I’ve been friendzoned before where he literally made me one of the guys and they all eventually started calling me dude, which stuck for years.
When you are called buddy, you know you got a one-way ticket to the Friendzoneville—the place where a bunch of great gals and guys are stuck in a limbo of their own unrequited love.
Its population is growing every day and hey, maybe soon your friend will visit it too!
4. Don’t dress up around him
We love to look our best simply because it makes us feel good. And if there is a chance that someone special will see us, it only gives us an extra boost of confidence and the will to dress up nicely.
But keep in mind that you want him to see you as a friend and not a potential partner.
He already knows how you dress up when you want to impress someone and if you’re dressing up the same way around him, you’re actually giving him hope.
If you two are planning on watching a game or some show, avoid the chance of it turning into Netflix and chill.
Put on some sweats, put your a messy hair in a bun and wear a preferably stained shirt.
Okay, so you don’t need to look like you don’t know the concept of taking baths and using a washing machine but you get the point.
You just don’t put any effort into dressing up when you’re going out with him, thus avoiding the chance for him to fall for you any further.
If he falls in love with the sweaty, messy and comfortable you just the way you are, maybe he’s not meant for the friendzone after all.
5. Avoid any alone time and date-like evenings
If he’s constantly inviting you to the movies, to play games, out on coffee breaks or to dinner, avoid them at all costs.
You’re just stringing him along and giving him hope that there is a chance it could turn into something more and that’s exactly what you are trying to avoid here.
A quick lunch or coffee when you run into each other is just fine.
You don’t want to cut him off completely, as it will result in him hurting or him pushing even harder. But keep a distance from him.
Suggest group hangouts. This way you will still spend time with him but you will be lowering the chances of making it into something personal and intimate.
You will have the perfect excuse to not talk to him, because you’ll be talking to someone else.
And when he approaches you in a more romantic way, you will suddenly have the urge to go to the bathroom.
It may seem like a game but it’s the game you have to play if you want to protect his feelings.
6. Put him on ice
If you are always the first one he calls when something happens, turn off your phone.
If you are always the one who goes running to him when he has a problem, stop making him your priority.
It can be hard, especially if you have strong friendly feelings but it’s what’s the best for him in the end that matters.
Show him that he’s not number one in your life and he will stop hoping he will eventually become something more.
If he asks for your help, don’t decline but avoid any emotions and physical contact. It’s important you don’t hug or touch him.
Keeping him on ice will give him a chance to take a step back and maybe realize that there is no hope for the two of you ever becoming an item.
And it could actually save you from going through the torture of putting someone into the friendzone.
Also, avoiding any emotional and physical contact is always a sign that something is off and it’s only a matter of time until he takes the hint.
If he doesn’t, I can only wish you the best of luck in friendzoning him.
7. He’s like a brother to you!
There is nothing that kills romantic feelings more than telling someone they are like a sibling to you.
If you are constantly dropping hints but he’s still not taking any, it’s time to level up the awkwardness.
Tell him how he feels like a brother to you and that you are so grateful to have him in your life.
It will immediately remind him of his sister and there is no way he will even want to think about you in a sexual way.
It’s simply disturbing to have any sexual connotations about your siblings and, well, you practically made the two of you just that.
If you want to step up your game even more, you can make him your fatherly figure.
If this doesn’t put him off, it’s time you cut all ties, because that’s one hell of a creeper you got there.
I mean, what kind of a person still has feelings toward someone who sees them as a father?
What kind of a person still keeps on pursuing someone who literally made them their father figure? That’s one hell of a screaming red flag right there.
8. Tell him about the man you fell in love with
Talk to him about your love problems and ask him for advice. This is the perfect way to tell him that you are not interested in him and that you see him only as a friend.
This will hurt him, yes, but it will also save you the trouble of giving him hints that you are not interested in him in that way.
Talk about the man you fell in love with and ask him for advice about the best way to approach him.
If this doesn’t help him to understand that nothing is going to happen between the two of you, the only option you have left is to tell him and cut him off until he cools down.
The first one is a fear of irrelevance, where he feels like a piece of furniture in his relationship or household and has no power or importance. They need to feel appreciated.
The second one is a fear of disappointment, especially when it comes to the women they like.
They will do anything that’s in their power to stop it from happening.
And the third one, the biggest one of them all, is fear of rejection. This way, you are still being a great frieTheir fragile little ego can take everything, but rejection not so much.
That’s why subtly giving him hints that you’re not into him and talking to him about the man you fell in love with hurts less than straight rejection.
This way, he will always hold on to the fact that you never really rejected him, because you ‘never knew’ he was into you in the first place. Isn’t life great?
9. Be his wingwoman
There is a great possibility he will come to you asking for relationship advice, asking you how to approach this amazing woman he fell in love with. And you are well aware of which woman he is talking about.
The best way to deal with this situation is to play the oblivious game once more.
Give him honest advice but never use ‘I’. Avoid talking about the things you prefer and the things you like.
Instead, talk generally and use ‘they’. Exclude yourself completely from the topic and point at some amazing women he can catch.
Slipping in info about the way your ‘potential date’ managed to win you over wouldn’t hurt either. This way, you are still being a great friend but still a taken one.
Another perfect way to get him off of your back is to get him another woman he can obsess over.
Plus, he will see that you see yourself as nothing more than just his ‘buddy’.
When you go clubbing or to the bar, boost his confidence a little bit and give him a little push to get another woman.
Or, take the matter into your own hands and get her to him. Who knows, maybe you will introduce him to his soulmate?
10. Show him your worst
And I mean THE worst. Don’t hide anything, put all of your grossest features on display and be proud of them.
Some men imagine their women like some kind of perfection, so when she farts it smells like flowers and similar shit.
So, it’s natural that they get easily disgusted once they realize it’s nothing like flowers and she’s far from the idea of perfection he has in his mind.
It’s important you don’t let him see the fluffy, ladylike side of you, the one he fell in love with.
There is a great possibility that you will completely disgust him by doing so, but hey! At least you don’t have to worry about him ever falling for you again.
Talk about your digestive system and don’t be afraid to burp and fart in front of him. Hey, desperate times are calling for desperate measures, right?
If you notice that he’s leaning in and he might spill some romantic shit, you spill your own. Well, not literally.
Tell him that you need to drop the number two and watch how his desire and eagerness sink away with whatever you digested that day.
11. Limit communication and keep your distance
The worst thing you can do while trying to cut someone off is to keep up the constant communication.
It’s important to limit your communication and do it only when it’s necessary.
This way, you can avoid all those deep topics that can get him into a romantic mood and you can avoid the possibility of you hurting him.
Distance is key when you’re trying to get someone to back off.
It can seem a bit radical and unusual for the two of you to not communicate but keep in mind that a little bit of distance goes a long way.
This is what all relationship experts are recommending— the no contact rule after a break-up.
You avoid all the possibilities of ever going back to him and drunk texting him.
You delete his number and delete him from all your social media accounts.
It can help you heal faster when there are not so many reminders of him around you. The same goes for this situation too.
You cut yourself out of his life gently but firmly, giving him a chance to gather his shit together and give your friendship a second chance.
12. Avoid meeting his family and friends
When he invites you over to his family barbecue and tells you that all of his friends will be there, it can seem innocent enough for you to go.
And when you’re out and his friends suddenly pop up, you can have a great time without even considering the consequences of that encounter.
Meeting his people is a completely normal thing when you are friends and it’s the law of friendship to share everything.
But once feelings are involved, that’s just an awkward situation for the both of you.
His family will ‘accidentally mistake’ you for a couple and ask you questions about how you two met and how long you’ve been dating.
Or they will constantly comment on how the two of you look great together and how it’s such a shame you’re not an item.
And his friends will give you nods of approval and make jokes about you getting it on with him. That’s not as innocent as it may seem.
He could be using his friends and family as a way of opening your eyes, to show you how great you are together and how everyone thinks you are the perfect couple.
It’s not impolite to correct everyone and deny all of those dating rumors but it seriously affects your friendship with him and the relationship you two have.
It also makes it awkward for everyone around the table, especially for you and him.
To him, it can seem like no big deal and he will laugh it away but it will still hurt him, it will still feel like a rejection.
To prevent any of this from happening, the best way is to avoid the possibility of it ever coming true.
Decline his invitations to family gatherings and if his friends show up at the bar, politely excuse yourself and leave them to enjoy guys’ night out.
13. If nothing works— time to break it down
This one is easier to say than it is to do. The whole point of the friendzone thing is to keep his feelings from being hurt and his heart from being broken.
And also, to keep us from being the bad guy, because no matter how we are portrayed, none of us enjoy breaking someone’s heart.
It’s something that usually bothers us more than it bothers the person on the other side. But, all that aside, you need to put yourself first.
If he is making you uncomfortable and his feelings are getting in the way of your friendship, you need to handle it.
If nothing from the list works, if he is still confident that you have feelings for him and that there is a chance of the two of you making it happen, then it’s time to get things done face to face.
It’s important that you are honest and determined in explaining it to him.
Being gentle and brutal at the same time is practically impossible and there is no perfect way in which you can do this. From my own experience, no one reacts the same.
Someone will laugh it all away and go on bullshitting around about how you are a bitch who led him on and someone else will be completely devastated but still respect you and your feelings.
It depends on the type of friendship the two of you had. If you shared everything, then the best thing you can do is to be completely honest with him.
Tell him that you two clicked but not in that kind of a way, at least not for you.
If you two shared everything, he already knows how you’re feeling, it’s just that he ignored it and hoped for the best. Either way, I wish you all the luck.
Love is a tricky thing and our hearts are often as wild as we are. We cannot control with whom we fall in love and we certainly cannot force love.
Even if the friendzone looks like the worst option and the worst thing you can do to someone who is in love with you, it’s actually the perfect way to keep them from the effects of rejection.
Because, you see, even the friendzone is better than fake love or being led on.
Unless you set the boundaries clear and straight, he will always hope that there will be something more, meaning his pain will only be prolonged.
And once it happens that you meet someone special, you will either put it on hold because of him or he will end up blaming you for not waiting for him.
Or he will keep on talking about how he gave you everything and you just used him.
To avoid all of this, put him in the friendzone or let him go for good.
The only other option you have left is to give it a shot, which is something you obviously don’t want to do.