I remember sitting on my bed, thinking about everything that happened between us.
I remember feeling guilty for destroying such a ‘perfect’ relationship.
For a long time, I thought I was the one to blame for everything bad that happened.
For a long time, I couldn’t imagine my life without you and I guess that is why I was so stubbornly looking for answers and reasons for our break-up.
I couldn’t accept the fact that I would no longer see your face but now I’m happy to say that it actually feels so good to be without you!
It took me a while to finally open my eyes and realize how stupid I was to think that I wouldn’t survive without you.
The only reason why I was convinced that my life would end together with our break-up is because you made me believe that I’m weak and that I need you to be my savior!
But guess what? I don’t need you and, in fact, I realized that I never did.
Had someone told me that I would feel such bliss and happiness in my soul once you were gone, I wouldn’t have believed them.
Had someone told me that I would feel so much stronger after everything that happened, I wouldn’t have believed them.
I wouldn’t have believed them because I didn’t want to believe.
I was just running in circles, thinking that I’d lost a big part of my soul once you were gone.
But the real truth is that I just learned a valuable lesson!
The real truth is that you were nothing more or less than a lesson that cost me a lot of tears, waiting and forgiving.
And after all that, boy, it feels so damn good to be without you!
It feels so good not to wait for your call, it feels so good not to wait for your excuses and it feels so good not to make you my only priority.
It feels so good to think about myself for a change and not give a damn about any of your bullshit!
It feels so good to know that every time I waited for you to call or text me, you were teaching me not to waste my time on those who don’t deserve it.
It feels so good to know that every time you made me cry, you were deliberately bringing me closer to the one who will make me smile.
It feels so good to know that every time you expected me to buy your bullshit, you were teaching me that only real men make the effort to treat their women with respect.
And I’m sorry to tell you this but you’re definitely not one of them and you never will be.
Real men don’t treat their women like shit and then expect them to stay.
They fight for them from the first to the last second and they never give up, no matter what.
And it feels so good to finally realize that you’re not that kind of man and you never will be.
It feels so good to finally open my eyes and see the real truth that your heart doesn’t have the capacity and it’s simply not capable of loving anyone.
The only person you will ever be able to love is yourself and once you finally realize that, it will be too late.
Once you realize that, I will probably be somewhere far away from you and I will never get the chance to see your regretful face.
But, hey, karma is a bitch, right?
After everything that happened, it would be a shame if you didn’t learn your lessons as well, just like I learned mine.
And trust me, once you feel a taste of your own medicine, you will be delighted because no matter how bitter the truth is, it’s the only thing that heals.
No matter how painful our lessons are, they are the only things that can help us open our eyes and continue our cruise through life in a more balanced sea and with the person with whom we’re meant to be.
So, after everything that happened, I thank you for helping me realize that you were just a passenger through my journey called life and that one day I’ll finally meet the one who will stay and teach me what love really is.