When a guy leaves you or ghosts you without giving you closure, the first thing you want to do is apply the no-contact rule. But what if the tables are turned?
What does it mean if he hasn’t contacted you in a month?
There you are, fighting with yourself not to call him and doing your best to make this man miss you. Nevertheless, obviously, he is doing the same thing.
A whole month has passed, and you’ve seen no sign of this guy.
Is this a red flag that he doesn’t care about you? Is he applying the no contact rule and waiting for you to reach out first? Has he moved on and is better off without you?
The possibilities are endless. And all you want to know is what is actually driving his behavior. What does it mean if he hasn’t contacted you in a month?
Well, even though every guy is different, there are some universal answers to this question. Here they are.
7 Things To Consider If He Hasn’t Contacted You In A Month
His heart has an argument with his head every time it beats
Most men are extremely stubborn creatures. They don’t like to be controlled, and they especially despise being told what to do.
At the end of the day, they even fight with themselves. I’m sure this situation is pretty familiar to you as well.
I’m talking about those moments when you feel like your heart is literally arguing with your head everytime it beats. Well, that’s exactly what’s going on with your guy over here.
Therefore, if he hasn’t contacted you in a month, it doesn’t have to mean that he has a secret life you know nothing about.
In fact, the explanation can be pretty simple: he doesn’t know what to do about you.
I don’t know what went on between you two, but it’s more than clear that his heart is telling him to go right to your doorstep and declare his eternal love for you.
On the other hand, his mind thinks you’re not a good option for him.
Of course, this has nothing to do with your value. This doesn’t mean I’m telling you that this man thinks you’re not worthy or good enough to be with him.
It’s possible that you two aren’t compatible. Or he is fighting some demons you have no clue about.
Either way, the point is that this man doesn’t know what he’s doing nor what he wants to do next.
You’re not the only one who is clueless here – he also sees that he’s at a crossroads, and he has no idea which direction to choose.
THE GOOD NEWS
As horrible as you must feel right now, there is a bright side to this entire situation. The good news about this man is that he loves you.
Well, actually, I’m not familiar with the details of your relationship, so I don’t know if “love” is too strong of a word. But to say the least, he cares about you deeply.
How can I be so sure about this? Well, when someone doesn’t give a damn about you, they don’t have a hard time giving up on you.
If his brain is telling him that you’re wrong for him or that you two shouldn’t be together, why would his heart have a say in this matter? That is, if he doesn’t have any feelings for you?
So, no matter what happens in the future, know that you were much more important to this man than he wanted you to be.
THE BAD NEWS
On the other hand, the bad news is that this is the kind of a guy who puts his stubbornness above his feelings. Even if you end up together, it won’t be your happily ever after.
Most of the time, he behaves like he doesn’t know what he wants. So, do you really want this kind of man to be your forever person?
Another piece of bad news is that you shouldn’t be surprised if he ends up leaving for good, despite the love he feels for you.
He might put his head above everything else, and if that happens, there is practically nothing you can do to change his decision.
He’s returning the favor
People assume that women are more vengeful than men; let me tell you that revenge knows nothing about gender. It’s a proven fact that men can be extremely vindictive when their hearts are broken.
Therefore, it’s possible that your ex-boyfriend hasn’t called you for one simple reason: because you didn’t call him either.
Or maybe he’s trying to pay you back for something you did in the past. Don’t worry. I’m not talking about huge things only. This could be the smallest inconvenience he had to go through because of you.
This may be something you’ve forgotten about completely. But he continues to remember, isn’t it obvious?
There are two options here.
One is that this guy has been plotting his revenge against you for some time now.
If he ghosted you and stopped returning your calls all of a sudden, maybe he waited until you fell in love with him for real.
Perhaps he wanted to make sure he’d gotten under your skin so he would be able to make you experience true heartbreak.
On the other hand, it’s also possible that he is just giving you a taste of your own medicine. Have you tried reaching out to him during this month? Or have you been silent, as well?
He may be waiting for you to make the first move. This guy doesn’t care that he’s male – he doesn’t want to be the one to humiliate himself.
Yes, that’s right. This is how he sees it. He would think of himself as a pathetic loser if he contacted you. He would think that he’s chasing you and boosting your ego at the same time.
THE GOOD NEWS
If he hasn’t contacted you in a month because he’s paying you back, you can easily end this charade in a couple of moves. All you have to do is be the first one to call him.
This might sound like I’m asking you to swallow your pride, but sadly, that’s the only way to get your ex boyfriend back to you. Otherwise, this game could go on forever.
Look, the ball is in your court – that’s the good news. Even though things don’t appear that way, the truth is that this situation is completely in your hands.
I promise you that he will give up on his revenge the moment you call him. After all, he got what he wanted, didn’t he? So what would be the point of keeping it up?
He will let his feelings take over, and he won’t continue with this game of playing hard to get.
THE BAD NEWS
On the other hand, do you really want to be with a man who goes through life with such immaturity? Let’s face it: instead of speaking up about what’s bothering him, he does everything the sneaky way.
Isn’t it true that you would have to watch your back whenever you’re with him? He obviously never forgets, holds grudges, and will always pay you back for your actions.
Besides, it’s also clear that he doesn’t care much about your feelings – even if he does love you. He’s allowed you both to suffer just to get his way.
His ego is more important than his feelings, and it’s up to you whether this is something you can put up with.
Men play the game: women know the score
Modern dating is all about different relationship mind games. Whether you like it or not (and let’s face it – who does?), this is simply how things are.
Well, if he hasn’t contacted you in a month, this could just be one of his tests. Maybe this guy is playing hard to get or just wants to show you he’s the dominant one.
This is a common strategy that, sadly, most men engage in. When two people are in any kind of a romantic relationship, it seems that the one who shows their feelings first is the loser.
If person A wears their heart on their sleeve, they’re automatically vulnerable. They’re putting their fate in person B’s hands.
Therefore, person B thinks that they can act however they want, without suffering any consequences.
After all, the first person loves them, so they’ll likely put up with their nonsense. They can treat them how they want, but person A won’t stop loving them.
The biggest problem here is that person A never knows whether the other one loves them back. They’re sending them mixed signals, and person A puts a lot of effort into trying to find out B’s true intentions.
So, how is this related to your current situation? Well, very.
You see, the object of your affection is doing everything in his power to avoid being person A in this story.
To be precise, he thought he had to become person B just to avoid getting hurt.
Everything is pretty clear: he wants you to chase him. He wants to be the one who doesn’t show his weak side, so he leaves you clueless.
He wants to make you wonder: Is he really interested? What is he doing? Where did all the love and affection from the beginning of your relationship go?
Before you know it, you’re dragged down with these doubts. You can’t get these questions out of your head, and you fall for him more and more each day.
So, when he reappears (and I assure you that he will), you’re happy that he’s finally back.
You don’t ask questions, and you don’t want to dig beneath the surface in an attempt to find out why he’s been acting this way.
You’ll welcome him with open arms, and that’s when you’re doomed. Without being aware of it, you’ve given him the green light to continue acting the way he wants.
With this move alone, you’ve allowed him to reach his goal. You’ve shown him that you’re the one who loves more, and again that’s when you’re doomed.
THE GOOD NEWS
Now that you’re familiar with this guy’s intentions, you’re one step ahead of him. If you’re interested in doing so, this is your chance to beat him at his own game.
Instead of doing what he expects you to do, show him that you’re a better player than he could ever be. The best way to do this is to engage in hot and cold psychology.
Before you know it, you’ll achieve what he wanted to accomplish with you. You’ll turn the tables on him, and he’ll be hooked on you, without knowing what hit him.
RELATED: Don’t Text Him And He Will Text You: 20 Reasons He Never Texts First
THE BAD NEWS
But if we look at things realistically, these kinds of games never come to an end. Now you fooled him, but nobody can guarantee that he won’t do the same thing to you in the future.
Once you enter this never-ending cycle, you can never get out of it. That is until you break all ties with this person.
You can’t have a healthy relationship based on these red flags.
If he wants you in his life, he’ll put you there
I know that this is the last thing you want to hear, but it’s an option you have to be introduced to. The bitter truth is that this man might not love you. Or what’s even worse, it’s possible that he never did.
Let’s disregard the fact that he is obviously a coward who didn’t have the guts to tell you this directly to your face.
Instead, he left you, thinking that everything he’s done is perfectly okay. He disappeared without giving you an explanation and left you wondering what went wrong.
But despite his immature moves, the bottom line stays the same: he wants you out of his life. Because if he felt any different, he would have put you in it.
At the end of the day, it’s completely irrelevant why he is behaving like this. Did he lose interest in you? Did he find someone better for him?
Did you two have a long distance relationship, and he realized that it doesn’t have a future?
Did he come to the conclusion you two can’t be in a serious relationship? Did you accidentally do something to chase him away?
Did he go back to his ex? Did he realize that you two weren’t cut out for each other?
I know that you’re desperate to get answers to these questions. But let’s face it: what difference would it make?
If this is the case with your guy, he’s already made up his mind. He’s cut all ties with you, and he’ll probably never contact you again.
THE BAD NEWS
The reality is that you can’t do much about getting this man back in your arms. Of course, you can try, but do you really want to manipulate him into coming back to you?
He’s not ready to put effort into being with you. Whatever obstacle he sees between you two, it’s clear that he’s not willing to try and overcome it.
I know that for you, the worst part is that you have to find a way to move on without closure. You were played and left hanging, and you don’t even know why it happened.
But please don’t go down that road. Don’t try looking for clues and an explanation for his sudden change of behavior.
Don’t misunderstand me. I’m not saying that you don’t deserve to know the truth because you certainly do. The point is that you’ll never get it as much as you try.
Nevertheless, what you will get is finding yourself further entrapped in this relationship.
Yes, you heard me right: if you go around looking for answers, this guy will remain present in your heart and mind even though he’s physically absent from your life.
So, instead of putting effort into moving on from this man, you’ll invest all of your energy into dragging yourself further into this net.
Instead of attempting to heal your broken heart, you’ll shatter it into even more pieces.
THE GOOD NEWS
But there is a silver lining to every cloud, and this situation is no exception.
Even though you see this outcome as the worst thing that could happen, try looking at things from another perspective, and you’ll realize there is some good news after all.
Look, at least you know where you stand, don’t you? Keeping in mind the fact that you are crazy for this guy, the truth is that he could have used your feelings against you.
He had the chance to take advantage of you in every possible way. Not only that: you thought of him as a great guy who also had the opportunity to keep on leading you on.
You could have spent years without having a clue that he didn’t love you back. So, if you could choose, would you rather live a sweet lie or be hit by the bitter truth? What would you prefer?
His fear of what could happen makes nothing happen
Even though all men hide their vulnerabilities, the truth is that each one of them has his share of fears. Therefore, it’s safe to assume that this guy hasn’t been calling you for a first date out of fear.
You see, some men have the uncontrollable urge to run away the moment they realize they’re in love. Instead of pursuing their feelings, they see them as a weakness that could eventually destroy them.
This is usually the case with emotionally damaged guys. They’ve spent their entire lives building an image based on toxic masculinity, which has now been shaken.
So, they think they have no other option but to run for their lives. They don’t have the courage to face the unknown, and soon enough, they’ll go back to their comfort zone of indifference.
Usually, these men are afraid of getting hurt, even though they would never admit this.
Even though they pretend to be heartless, they’re perfectly aware that their heart is actually quite fragile and that it can be broken.
That’s why they choose to save themselves before they lose control of their emotions. They want to escape until they stop being in charge of their own actions.
This type of guy is afraid to let you in all the way. He’s scared that he’ll start loving you more than he loves himself and that he’ll end up destroyed if you ever decide to leave him.
But then, there is another type of fear: the fear of rejection. It’s quite possible that you’re actually dealing with a shy guy.
As a man, he’s been initiating most of the contact from day one. Even though you’ve been sending him signals that you’re also into him, he failed to see them.
After a while, he decided to step back, and now he is too shy to try and come back into your life. He is convinced that you’d shut the door right in his face, and that’s a risk he’s not willing to take.
THE BAD NEWS
Whatever the truth is, the fact of the matter is that you’re dealing with a coward. This is a man who doesn’t have what it takes to make himself happy – so how could he do the same for you?
Maybe he knows what he wants, but he clearly doesn’t possess the necessary strength to make it his.
The thing is that this man’s fear of what could happen eventually makes nothing happen. And if he is like this when it comes to his love life, he is probably like this in all other aspects of life.
He is not the kind of person who takes risks, no matter the potential gain. Instead, he prefers playing it safe.
THE GOOD NEWS
On the other hand, if this guy doesn’t love you to the bottom of his heart, he wouldn’t have been this scared, would he? Only great things produce great fear.
Basically, the good side of this story is that there is no doubt in this man’s feelings.
On the other hand, it’s also obvious that he doesn’t have the capacity to handle them. Like many other cases, the steering wheel is in your hands.
Excuses are a polite form of rejection
Sometimes, your situation isn’t as typical as it is described here. You can’t tell that your guy hasn’t contacted you in a month.
But if we look at things realistically, your conversations were worse than silence whenever he reached out.
Maybe he sent you one or two texts during this time, liked a few of your posts, and called you once this month.
Technically, he did call you, so you don’t want to make a big deal, but in reality, it’s pretty much the same as if he didn’t. The only thing you know is that he is safe and sound – everything else is a mystery.
You don’t ask him about his activities and whereabouts. But he is clearly too busy since he didn’t have the time to ask you out at least once.
Come on, let’s be honest: is it possible that he couldn’t have found the time? Or is he trying to avoid you?
This man is a special kind of coward. He doesn’t have what it takes to even ignore you.
Instead, he keeps you as a backup plan. If everything else fails and if all the other girls dump him, he wants you to be his safety net – someone who will always keep the door open for him.
Another valid option is that he’s putting the responsibility on you. He hasn’t really left you, but he is not around either.
It’s safe to assume that he wants you to make the first move. He expects that his behavior will annoy and bother you. Naturally, you’ll make a big fuss here, and eventually, you’ll be the one dumping him.
If that happens, he is leaving you to fight with this guilt while he walks out of your relationship unharmed. How convenient is that?
THE BAD NEWS
Whenever you ask this guy what’s going on with him, he gives you fake responses. He’s too busy, or he’s been going through a hard time.
Well, let me tell you that these are all empty excuses. He’s justifying himself instead of telling you straight that he wants out.
The truth is that he hopes that one of these days, you’ll get tired of waiting for him. He expects you to slam the door right in his face and do his dirty work for him.
Soon enough, he’ll stop calling you. You won’t be receiving those few text messages a month anymore.
It’s not likely that this guy will regret losing you. I hate to break it to you, but this is exactly what he wanted all along.
THE GOOD NEWS
Nevertheless, the most important thing here is that you’ve finally realized this. As painful as the truth is, at least you got hold of it.
Now when everything is clear, you have a chance for a fresh start. Instead of hoping for a miracle that will never come, see this as an opportunity to heal and let go.
Someone else did what you didn’t do
I hate to break it to you, but if he hasn’t contacted you in a month, it is also quite likely that this guy’s found someone else. Or maybe this girl was with him all along? Or he got back with his ex?
Either way, the point is that he is no longer single. I’m sure you already went through all of his social media profiles, looking for clues of his new romance.
But hey, just because you had no success in finding anything doesn’t mean that he isn’t seeing anyone. Don’t forget that some people like to keep their personal lives as private as possible.
Besides, maybe he is consciously hiding details of his love life from you. He knows that he treated you like trash, so the last thing he wants is for you to see him happily in love with another woman.
Either way, the brutal truth is that you’re stuck in the same place while this man has moved on with his life. He’s not calling you because there is someone else he’d rather call.
But please don’t take this personally. I know how you must feel, especially if this man kept blabbing on and on about him not being ready for a relationship.
Well, obviously, he didn’t want a relationship with you. Nevertheless, as soon as this girl appeared, his attitude changed.
The only thing you have the right to hold against this guy is the treatment you received from him. He didn’t have the decency to tell you that you two were over and that he found someone new.
Instead, he ran away from his responsibility and kept on living his life as if nothing happened and as if he hadn’t left you waiting.
This is something he can be held accountable for. On the other hand, it doesn’t give you the right to interfere in his new relationship.
This guy’s new girlfriend doesn’t deserve you hating her. She didn’t do anything wrong. Besides, she probably doesn’t even know that you exist.
So, instead of pointing the finger at her, look the truth in the eyes and understand who the one to blame is.
Once again, he is not guilty for moving on with his life; he is only guilty of not being brave enough to come clean with you.
The worst thing you can do in this situation is to compete with this girl. She doesn’t necessarily have to be prettier, funnier, or smarter than you.
You can spend a lifetime looking for her flaws. You can badmouth her as much as you want and talk about how you’re better than her.
But whether you’d like to admit it or not, despite all of this, she is the girl this guy chose. She is the one he wants to be with, and she is clearly the one who gave him something you couldn’t.
Of course, this is not something to blame yourself over. You could have moved mountains for his sake, but if you two are not meant to be, you’ll never end up together. And there is nothing you can do about it.
Well, technically, you can scheme against them and do everything in your power to break them apart.
Nevertheless, that would only make you look pathetic and desperate. Even if you succeed, do you really want to be with a guy you manipulated into choosing you?
To be precise, whenever you find yourself in a situation where you’re someone’s backup option, it’s time to leave for good.
THE BAD NEWS
I’ll be dead honest here: it’s over. Even if he realizes that you’re the one and breaks things off with his new GF, this will always be a challenge that stands in your way.
As much as it looks like you’ve forgiven him, the truth is that you’d always know that he brought a third person into your lives.
Not only that: he also went behind your back. He didn’t utter a word until he was sure that his new romance had potential.
He was sneaky and unfair. Besides, he obviously never loved you enough. Otherwise, he couldn’t have replaced you as easily as he did the moment he found someone who suited him better.
THE GOOD NEWS
But instead of seeing this as a loss, see it as hitting the biggest jackpot you could have ever imagined. Having this man disappear from your life is not a curse – it’s a blessing.
Even if you don’t see it now, the truth is that you dodged a bullet when he found someone else. It’s pretty clear that he has no idea what commitment means and doesn’t know how to stay faithful.
Not only that: this guy doesn’t have what it takes to stand before his actions. Instead, he is nothing but a chicken, and you’re much better off without him.
6 Reasons Why He Showed Up After A Month
Let’s get one thing straight. Everyone shows up sooner or later. Some guys come knocking on your door after a month, and some appear in your DMs after a couple of months.
But after the no contact rule, most men will get back to you.
Some will do it to check up on you, some to see whether you’re still right there where they left you, some to break your heart all over again, and some because they realized what they’ve lost.
So, let’s check out what it could mean if he hasn’t contacted you in a month but now shows up.
He realized his feelings didn’t leave just because he did
Let’s start with the scenario you’ll probably enjoy the most. This doesn’t only happen in romantic dramas: sometimes, people really do realize what they’ve lost when it’s gone.
Well, this is exactly what happened with your guy. He tried leaving you for a reason only known to him, but it hit him that he loves you, despite what he thought.
Maybe he thought you weren’t good enough for him. Or he wanted some time alone. It is possible that he wasn’t aware of his true feelings while you were around, within arm’s reach.
Or he got cold feet and tried saving himself from all of these emotions that threatened to overwhelm him. But he clearly didn’t escape in time, and the love he feels for you is stronger than his fears.
What matters is that now he wants you back. Just like that, he expects you to forget that he’s been gone for an entire month.
He expects you not to ask him what he’s been doing and who he’s been seeing. Instead, he just wants to continue where you two left off the last time.
Of course, he hopes that you spent this entire time waiting for him. He hopes that you put your life on hold and that now after everything, you’ll forgive him without second-guessing his behavior.
Well, it’s up to you whether you let him become a part of your life once again. Or you’ll find a way to punish him for this period of no contact.
Look, this man clearly loves you, even if he tries to hide it. But does this fact alone justify him ghosting you like that?
Are you one of those people who thinks that true love conquers all? Or will you put your pride above your emotions?
Let’s face it – if this option turns out to be true, you’ll get what you’ve been dreaming of all of this time. At this point, everything depends on you and your decision.
If you’re not worthy of his time at 2 pm, he’s not worth yours at 2 am
Sadly, the previously described situation is quite rare. On the other hand, being a guy’s booty call after a month of no contact is a common scenario.
How can you tell if he wants to use you or if he realized that he has feelings for you? Well, the first thing you should pay special attention to is the time of day he’s messaging you.
If this guy reappears in your life and starts calling you in the middle of the night asking to sleep at your place or invites you to come over – it’s all pretty clear.
Of course, this doesn’t have to be the case if your phone rings during the day as well.
Nevertheless, if he forgets that you exist until the next Saturday night, he needs company. And he’ll forget about you the very next day, the same way he does after you reject him.
If you don’t believe me – try it for yourself. Before you know it, he’ll drag you into some kind of no-strings-attached relationship.
If nothing else, you’ll sleep with him. And tomorrow, he’ll act like nothing happened last night.
Don’t get me wrong: there is nothing wrong with reminiscing about the good old times with your ex-boyfriend. But that can only happen if you both have the same intentions.
On the other hand, if you still love him and see this as a chance to get back together while he sees you as nothing more than a booty call, I have some bad news for you.
The worst part is that, when a similar situation happens, you’re probably not his first choice. He’s been out clubbing and approaching every girl he ran into but didn’t score.
Or he is home alone, scrolling through online dating apps, looking for company. When that didn’t work, he remembered you existed.
So, he decided to take a shot. He couldn’t handle the fact that every girl he tried hitting on rejected him that night, so he turned to you – his safety net.
When this happens, I’m begging you not to give him what he wants. Show him that he can’t reappear in your life whenever he wants his needs taken care of.
Besides, what is even more important is that you make this guy understand that you’re the whole package. He can’t choose to have your body without your mind and heart.
His ego can’t handle lack of success
While talking about a man’s ego, let’s mention those guys who can’t stand losing someone they thought they owned.
It’s not that they only hate being rejected; according to them, they’re so fatally attractive that every girl who’s ever been in love with them should keep them in her mind forever.
Sounds familiar, right? Well, what if your man is this type?
What if he’s reaching out to you after all this time just to prove a point? He wants you both to know that he can have you whenever he wants.
This man is not interested in your well-being. He doesn’t plan on getting back together with you, nor did he suddenly realize he loves you.
Instead, he’s making sure you’re still his in a way. He wants to see for himself that he’s made such a great impression on you that you’ll never manage to forget him.
He’s clearly egotistical and needs your validation to feel worthy. He sees you as an ego boost and as a woman who will help him regain his self esteem.
If you suspect that you’re dealing with someone like this, the only choice you have is to completely blow him off because this is not a person you can have a good relationship with.
Destroy him by showing him how irrelevant he’s always been to you. He’s not a man who left a mark on your life, and he was just a stop along the way.
It’s not only that you don’t miss him – he never crosses your mind either. You’ve continued with your life as though you never met him, and you couldn’t care less about him.
So, should you text him? Well, if you want to get this effect, send him a text back and answer his phone call.
If you ignore him, he’ll make up a scenario in which you’re too hurt to even hear his voice. And even that means that he’s important and that you’re not indifferent.
On the other hand, if you show him that you’re thrilled to hear from him, he’ll see that you’ve been longing for him.
Therefore, you have to find a balance between these two opposite ends. Be polite and treat him like an old, long-forgotten friend.
Don’t show any interest in his love life, and don’t dare mention your history together. Show him that his disappearance didn’t leave any trace on you and that you hold no grudges for his toxic behavior.
For the first time ever, leave him confused. Destroy his ego, and you’ll destroy him!
Memory is a strange thing
Wouldn’t it be great if we could have full control over our minds? I’m referring to our memory the most here. You choose what and who you remember and what and who you’ll forget forever.
Well, sadly, things don’t work out like that. We’re not robots – we’re human beings, and your guy is no exception.
This might not sound as romantic as you expected, but if he hasn’t contacted you in a month and now, he sent you a good morning text out of the blue – it’s possible that you crossed his mind and he decided to see what you’ve been up to.
Maybe your mutual friends brought up your name, or something completely random reminded him of you. It doesn’t have to mean that he has a romantic interest in mind – maybe he just wants to stay best friends.
Of course, this is only possible if you two ended on good terms and if you didn’t have a serious relationship.
On the other hand, if one of you left the other heartbroken or if things had a rocky end, he would never call you to catch up with you.
In that case, you appearing in his memory has a completely different connotation. He remembered the love you two shared and obviously felt nostalgic about it.
Maybe he heard a song you liked, saw someone who looked just like you, or remembered the way you spent Valentine’s day together.
Either way, one thing is clear: when this man thinks of your relationship, he’s anything but indifferent.
Whatever the truth is, if I were you, I wouldn’t get my hopes up. Wait patiently to see whether he’ll do anything to maintain the communication or if this will be a one-time thing.
If he keeps on calling you, reminiscence was just an excuse. He didn’t text you because he didn’t know how to break the ice, so he used this approach to get closer to you.
If this was a one-time thing, don’t look for a deeper meaning. This man simply remembered you, and there is nothing more to it than that.
He keeps you around just long enough to forget the one he truly loves
There is nothing worse than being your loved one’s rebound girlfriend. When you go through it, you’re hurt by the fact that your BF never thought of you as a person he could love.
For him, you were nothing but an object to help him achieve his goals.
When you come to think about it, you two never stood a chance. All of this time, his heart has been choosing another woman.
He was using you to forget about this fact. This is why he’s reached out to you now: to give him the comfort he desperately needs.
Challenges are what make life worth living
You know how they say that the grass is always greener on the other side? Why is that so? Well, the truth is that human beings don’t know how to appreciate something or someone while we still have it.
This is a detailed description of your failed relationship, isn’t it? As long as you were within this guy’s reach, he wasn’t worried about losing you.
But now, things have changed: you became a challenge for him. OMG, you’ve gotten far away from him, and now he is no longer sure whether he can have you or not.
Maybe he saw pics of you looking better than ever, or perhaps he heard that you have a new job or told your mutual friends you’re seeing someone new.
You’ve respected the no contact rule, and he hasn’t heard from you in a month, so he wonders if you ever cared for him.
That is exactly why he’s calling you: to check whether he still has the necessary charm to knock you off your feet.
To Wrap Things Up:
Let’s get one thing straight: if he hasn’t contacted you in a month, this guy doesn’t love you enough. I don’t care what happened and what his excuses are, but nobody can justify an absence this long.
I’m not saying that he hasn’t repented for his actions. Maybe he regrets doing this, but the truth is that if he really loved you, he would have found a way to reach out.
This is especially true if he went no contact without actually breaking up with you and vanished without an explanation.
But it’s up to you whether you’ll take him back or not. Can you live with the fact that he could live without you for all this time?