Catching feelings is something we can never control. There isn’t an on or off button, neither for catching feelings nor for losing them.
As awful as it seems, there are some ways to lose feelings for someone, no matter if this is a part of the healing process after a breakup or if you love someone who doesn’t feel the same way about you.
These tips and tricks are also for those who have a significant other who consistently acts against their best interests.
You see, unfortunately, there are many situations that may force you to start the process of losing feelings for someone. Yes, to start the process. Not to lose feelings right away.
Losing feelings for someone is a hard process that requires a lot of time and effort. However, don’t let this get you down.
Long ago, a smart guy said that patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet, and you know what? Aristotle, you were totally right!
So, if you’re wondering how to lose feelings for someone, it’s easy to assume that patience is one of the most important factors!
How To Lose Feelings For Someone – 15 Different Ways
Going through heartbreak, loving someone who doesn’t feel the same way or someone you can’t have…All these things have something in common – they’ve made you wonder how to lose feelings for someone.
Keep reading if you’re interested in knowing the details!
1. Know your deal breakers
Many problems in relationships, no matter how serious they are, arise from the fact that you get lost between what’s a deal breaker for you and what’s not.
Deal breakers depend on what you prioritize. For instance, you met someone with great qualities, there was an instant click, and before you knew it…you fell in love with them.
After some time, you start to realize that your partner is financially unstable. Most of the time, this doesn’t affect you. However, if you want to live with them and share expenses, you soon realize that this is a huge deal breaker.
That’s why…if you think that someone is bad for you and that a relationship with them brings you a lot of problems, just write down all deal breakers.
You will have a list of all the bad things your partner does, things that are simply unforgivable to you.
This way, it will be easier for you to stop loving someone as you’ll become aware that they don’t satisfy your essential needs.
2. See the real picture
Most of the time, many people won’t see the real picture because they use it as some kind of defense mechanism. They are too afraid to face the truth.
Of course, being positive and having hope that things will get better is a sign of huge strength. It will get better! Of course, it will!
Your well-being will improve, not because you’ll finally have a good relationship with them but because you’ll work on yourself!
As harsh as it seems, you gain nothing from imagining a future that will never happen. By accepting this fact, you have passed the first phase of healing – acknowledging that there is a problem.
3. Cut off communication with them
You can’t lose feelings for someone if they keep popping up at you on Facebook, TikTok, or any other app. That’s why it’s vital for your healing process to unfollow and unfriend them on every social media platform. Yes, every!
It won’t have any effect if you remove them from everything except Instagram because you want to know what’s going on in their life.
No…no, you don’t want to know what they’re doing. This will only hurt you more and prolong your period of suffering. So, stick to the no contact rule.
This is definitely not an easy thing to do. It will be hard for a couple of months, but then things will get better.
In cases where you can’t avoid that person, if they are a classmate or coworker, try to minimize contact and in-person conversations as much as you can.
4. Don’t run from your feelings
The one thing you should never do is run from your emotions. No matter what, don’t you dare suppress them!
This will only have a counter effect and seriously affect your mental health. Those negative emotions are there on purpose. They always teach you a lesson and make you stronger.
The universe will never give you battles you aren’t able to fight! So the first step in this fight is to hug those negative emotions and kill them by embracing them. What does this actually mean?
If you feel like you only want to lie in bed and listen to your go-to breakup song, do so. If you feel that one season of your best series on Netflix isn’t enough, go with the second.
This is also the way to heal a broken heart. Acknowledge your feelings, but don’t let them rule you. Just keep in mind that even next week, you’ll feel better than you are now.
5. It’s not your fault
Having a relationship is a full-time job. It requires effort and investment. Sometimes, despite all of our effort, things don’t work out. Why? Some things aren’t meant to last.
Ending a long-term relationship might leave you with thoughts that it’s your fault and that you’re the one who should be blamed.
Relationships are, indeed, two-sided. If you want your relationship to last a lifetime, then this requires effort from both of you.
One person could put 150% of the effort into a relationship, but if the other person doesn’t even give 1%, you can’t say that this is a sign of a committed relationship.
So, the only guilt you should feel is that you didn’t get out of that relationship earlier.
6. Know your worth
Knowing your worth is always important, especially if you’re involved in a relationship where your self-esteem is being undermined.
So, what do you do then? It will require effort and time to find your way back to who you are.
After you acknowledge your feelings and take some time to heal, now’s the time to regain the confidence that your crush took from you.
If they treated you badly and said awful things about you, do your best to realize that most of the things they said aren’t true.
They used those words as weapons to cover up the fact that they’re the ones who think of themselves as worthless. If there are certain things you did and consider mistakes, try to forgive yourself for that.
Nobody is perfect, and everybody makes mistakes. The only important thing to remember is that you aren’t considered a bad person if you had no intention of hurting someone.
7. You have a future
When in a relationship, you are in a head-over-heels state. Something that spontaneously occurs in your relationship is planning a future together. Therefore, all your life goals are directed toward that one person.
Even if you aren’t together and they don’t know you’re into them, you will avoid some of your goals to keep yourself close to that person.
Therefore, planning a future with your significant other seems great until you break up. Then, you are left alone and need to fundamentally change your life goals.
This might scare you – you’re probably thinking that there’s no future for you, not only in romantic relationships but also in every other aspect of your life.
Well, words of comfort are not needed here. Why?
Because soon after the breakup, you’ll realize that there are a lot of great people out there, people who are more intelligent, more comforting, and with a better sense of humor.
The world is only as fascinating as our curiosity. So explore! Explore the world, and you’ll see that there is a bright future ahead of you! Don’t ruin your present for someone who was never your future.
See also: Don’t Allow Your Heartbreak To Dictate Your Future
8. Focus on other relationships
People in romantic relationships often don’t pay attention to the other relationships in their lives. Now is a perfect time to revive old relationships with your best friends and family members.
They are probably eager for your presence, but you’ll also benefit from spending time with them. So it’s a win-win situation.
Your loved ones can improve your mental health and well-being just by talking to you. They know you to your core and were there from the beginning. They may also give you some advice on how to lose feelings for someone.
But even if they don’t, the time spent with them will be a good way to help you move forward. Quality time with quality people is a luxury nowadays!
9. But also focus on yourself
You can’t move forward if there is no self-love. And there is no self-love if you don’t treat yourself right.
There are many healthy ways you can get rid of all those negative emotions. Let’s start with the basic ones. For example, you’re still eating French fries with mayo because you got into a habit with them in a relationship.
But you never really liked that combination. So now, feel free to order French fries with ketchup! I know it may sound silly, but trust me when I say that these little things are the key to losing feelings for someone.
Self-care is also something that you should practice more often. As everyone has their own definition of self-care, think of self-care as anything that recharges your batteries and gives you a physical and mental boost.
Additionally, try spending some time in nature. Some studies have shown that walking in nature for an average of 15 minutes a day can significantly lower your stress levels and general well-being.
10. New hobbies
Hobbies are a great form of occupation. If there was something you always wanted to try but never did, now’s a perfect time. My advice is to start with hobbies that include some physical exercise.
This way, not only are you preoccupied with something and aren’t thinking about your ex, but you’re also doing something good for your body. You’ll kill two birds with one stone.
Besides this, do anything that fulfills you. Reading books? Some karate lessons? Or is it time to finally learn to cook?
Try and explore new things. You never know if you have a hidden talent!
See also: 55 Empowering Hobbies For Women In Their 20s
11. Positive affirmations
When you spend too much time thinking about bad feelings, you become demotivated, lonely, and slightly depressed.
In extreme situations, negative physical conditions may arise, or preexisting ones may worsen. So, if you’re wondering how to lose feelings for someone, the answer is by using affirmations.
Try writing down or saying out loud the following sentences:
• Whatever happens, I can and will be happy.
• Heartache only makes me feel more resilient.
• I’m a happy person; this breakup won’t keep me from being happy.
• I’m going to leave this behind.
• This pain is temporary; I’ll be better.
• It’s not the end of the world if I am alone.
12. Find someone new…or don’t?
Getting into a new relationship right after ending your last one can provide you with some benefits. First of all, you won’t be obsessing over your ex…at least not so much.
Also, a rebound is a great thing as it can restore your self-confidence by helping you realize that you are still the amazing, attractive person you were before your breakup.
And no matter how light your rebound relationship is, it might also prevent you from getting back together with your ex-partner. This, however, works only for some people.
For others, a not-so-healthy way to lose feelings for someone is to immediately start dating someone else.
Many people can’t get over someone by finding someone new, no matter how much the breakup or unrequited love may hurt.
They spend most of the dates wondering if it’s still soon for dating and comparing everyone with them while they can’t help not talking about them.
If you are one of those people, it’s best you don’t date anyone, as your wounds from the breakup aren’t healed yet.
13. If you need space, have it
Trying to lose feelings for someone can be a tough time. It makes you overwhelmed and anxious and puts you under great pressure.
And all of a sudden, everyone expects you to start over, do something revolutionary and forget the person you love so much overnight.
Don’t let this put any pressure on you. Although spending time with family and friends can help improve your well-being, it can sometimes also decrease it.
So, yes. It’s completely fine to distance yourself from everyone for a while until you’re ready to talk about your feelings.
14. Some things take time
It’s hard to let go of a relationship or person who meant a lot to you. However, if you’re already reading this, then you’ve probably taken the first step.
After carefully reading all of this advice, it’s time to listen to them to finally move on. Before anything else, I need to say that there will be ups and downs.
There will come a time when you’ll want to give up and do something bad, a time when you’ll think that all these ways to lose feelings for someone have no effect. A hopeless time.
But just keep going – I’m sure you’ll see the results sooner than you think! Time heals all wounds. And there’s nothing you can’t overcome!
15. A therapist is your friend
Time heals all wounds, and yes, there’s nothing you can’t overcome. But if you want a little help on that journey, there is no shame in seeking professional help or talking with relationship experts.
When you’re feeling hopeless and think there is no point or you can’t see any improvement, a therapist might help you.
Being alone is hard, being in a bad relationship is hard, and being alone but wanting to lose feeling for someone you truly love is definitely one of the hardest things.
The journey of how to lose feelings for someone isn’t easy, but if you follow these tips and have some faith in the power of time, you’ll soon see that there is nothing you can’t overcome.
Prioritize yourself and believe you’re going to feel better, and you will!