Has your friend changed their behavior towards you, and you’re afraid that it’s slowly ruining your friendship? Check out for these clear signs your friend doesn’t respect you, and if you recognize these behavioral patterns with your friend, ending that friendship would be for the best.
You should first ask yourself: what does friendship mean to you? What does a real friend mean to you? For me, it’s a person who knows me the best and accepts me just the way I am. It’s someone who knows all of my secrets and would never betray me.
A best friend is someone who is a companion to you, no matter where you decide to go. It’s a person who respects, supports, and encourages you in everything you do.
In my opinion, friendship is our safe haven during tough times. True friendship is something we can always hold on to, and it’s definitely something that makes our lives a whole lot better.
If you want to have a successful and healthy friendship, you must be aware that it’s a two-way street. One side can’t handle and take on the burden of the relationship.
Mutual respect is an essential building block for a healthy relationship. Any kind of relationship can and will be ruined if there’s a lack of respect.
Unfortunately, friendships have become so shallow nowadays. It has become too difficult (almost impossible) to find a true friend. So, if you have a friend who respects, supports, and accepts all of you, you should consider yourself lucky and hold on to that person.
16 Truthful Signs Your Friend Doesn’t Respect You
If you’re questioning whether or not your friend respects you, here are some signs of disrespectful friends below, and I truly hope you won’t recognize them in your friendship.
Your friendship is pretty one-sided
Friendship is and always should be a two-way street. As in romantic relationships, you simply get as much as you put in.
If you’re in a one-sided friendship, if you’re the only one who puts effort into making your friendship work, I’m sorry, but that kind of friendship is doomed to fail. Also, it’s one of the most obvious red flags your friend doesn’t care enough for you.
They’re envious of your accomplishments
Unfortunately, this has become a very common scenario. There are so many people who’ll pretend that they are our friends but would actually be jealous of us all the time.
They really should never be given the title of a friend as they clearly don’t deserve it. True friends are always proud of your accomplishments, and they rejoice in your success because, in a way, your happiness is also theirs.
They’re meddling in your love life
This should be a very clear boundary you should set at the beginning of your friendship. Your friends have every right to advise you, but you should never allow them to meddle in other spheres of your life or to make any decisions on your behalf.
If your friend oversteps this boundary, it’s a clear sign of disrespect. Remember, a good friend will always try to help you with a piece of advice, but they’ll always let you make the final decision and accept it, even if they don’t agree with it.
They’re always belittling you
If your friend has criticized and belittled you on multiple occasions, it’s a huge red flag that they don’t care enough for you. I really think that we should be able to express all our emotions to our close friends.
However, you aren’t someone’s punching bag for them to take out every negative emotion they have. And if you let someone behave like that, it would mean you don’t have respect for yourself.
The worst thing is if your friend is always belittling you in front of other people. Even if the experts agree that a person who’s belittling their friends is doing it only because they have a negative self-image, you should try to get through to your friend, but you simply shouldn’t tolerate that behavior for too long.
They don’t care about your feelings at all
We all don’t feel good when someone insults or makes fun of us, right? I think we all know that. That’s the reason we will never do that to our loved ones because we simply don’t want to hurt them.
So, if your friend is belittling or making fun of you in front of others or if you’re always being stood up at the last minute, those are all very clear signs they don’t care about you at all. You can try to warn them that their behavior is ruining your friendship. However, if it keeps happening, the best thing for you would be to leave that friend behind.
They also don’t care for or appreciate your opinion
A true friend is someone who’ll always need your counsel on every important decision they have to make because they appreciate your opinion more than anyone else’s.
Also, they’ll come to you for advice every time they have issues in their romantic relationships. It’s simply what good friends in healthy friendships do.
If your friend doesn’t care for your opinion at all, it’s a big sign of disrespect, and it’s a huge red flag that your friendship will end sooner or later.
You’ve caught them in a lie repeatedly
When someone keeps lying to you, it’s one of the most obvious signs that they don’t respect you at all. Of course, white lies are acceptable because we all sometimes lie to protect the feelings of people we honestly love and care for.
If your friend lies to you often and for no good reason (even though I don’t know what could be a good reason for lying to your close friends ), you should confront them about it and express your concern about how it may lead to your friendship ending.
They never keep their promises
Is there a more obvious sign that your friend doesn’t respect you than this one? No, right? IF your friend doesn’t keep their word, it’s a clear sign they don’t care for your feelings because they know that those broken promises will hurt you.
You shouldn’t consider someone a true friend if they don’t keep their word and break their promises. Those types of people can never be trusted, and we all know that trust is the first and the most important foundation in any kind of relationship.
They aren’t supportive at all
A good friend is someone who always stands beside you, motivating you to keep going and supporting you in every decision or choice you make. They’ll root for you even when all the odds are against you.
Supporting your friends is the surest sign that you respect them and honestly care for them. If you never get any kind of support from your friends, it’s clear that they neither respect you nor your choices.
Your friendship was never a priority to them
When someone considers you a true friend, they’ll always put your friendship at the very top of their priority list. They know how important you are to them, and that’s why they’ll always prioritize your friendship over anything else.
A clear sign your friend doesn’t respect you is if they cancel on you frequently. If they value your friendship, they’ll always find time to hang out with you, even if their schedule is full.
They don’t want to apologize for their wrongdoings
One of the surest signs your friend doesn’t respect you is if they never apologize when they do something wrong or hurt you. It’s a huge signal they don’t care for your feelings at all.
We all make mistakes, we all hurt people we care for sometimes, and that’s a fact. However, if we honestly care for someone, we’ll work hard to earn their forgiveness and show them how truly sorry we are.
They trash-talk you
A real friend won’t ever trash talk you to other people because they know how wrong it is and how it may hurt you and harm your friendship. If they are bothered by something you’ve said or done, they’ll try to work it out with you face to face.
Your best friend should be your confidant, a person who should never, no matter what, betray you or your secrets. If they do, it only shows that they don’t respect you and that you shouldn’t consider them a true friend.
They’ve violated your boundaries many times
A very obvious sign your friend doesn’t respect you is when they don’t respect your boundaries and limitations. The reason we set boundaries is to protect our emotional and mental health, and if a person keeps overstepping them, it’s a clear sign they don’t deserve a place in your life.
You have to ask yourself if you really want to continue being friends with someone who uses your kindness to repeatedly violate your boundaries. I think the answer here is pretty clear.
They use your friendship only to suit their own needs
If you feel that your friend calls you only when it’s convenient for them or when they need something from you, it’s pretty clear they’re only using you.
You have to understand that not all people have a pure soul like you do and that some people will only hang out with you to take advantage of you. You should never allow that. Don’t be someone’s option when many other people would be more than happy to have you as their friend.
They’re constantly trying to compete with you
Friendship isn’t and must never be a competition. It’s a union of two people who support, respect, and motivate each other. It’s a relationship where people stay loyal to each other no matter what.
If you feel like your friend is constantly trying to compete with you, I’m sorry I have to break it out to you, but the truth is that person isn’t a true friend. You should inspire each other to be better, but you should never be jealous of each other’s accomplishments and achievements.
They often cancel on you at the very last minute
A good friend would never stand you up without good reason. They’ll never cancel on you at the last minute if something really big and important didn’t come up for them.
Real friends care about your feelings, and they would never leave you hanging because they know that could hurt your feelings. If something happens that may prevent them from meeting you when you’ve agreed to meet, then they’ll always try to give you proper notice.
How Should You Deal With A Disrespectful Friend?
Dealing with a disrespectful friend you deeply care for is always very complicated and difficult. You can’t put up with their behavior anymore, but at the same time, you don’t want to lose them forever.
Here are a few very efficient tips that will help you open up to your friend about what’s bothering you. It will also help you come to a final (and I hope the right) decision about the future of your friendship.
• You need to distance yourself
If you have recognized a few of these behavioral patterns of a disrespectful friend above, you should try to pull away for a while. You should distance yourself from your friend at least until you make a final decision on your friendship.
That quiet time may help you understand the reasons why your friend is so disrespectful towards you. Maybe they’re dealing with some personal issues, which made them neglect your friendship a little bit.
However, even if that’s the case, you simply can’t allow them to negatively affect your mental health. If something is bothering them, they should come to you and tell you as true friends do.
• Reset your boundaries
You have probably set some boundaries in your friendship before, but the other side has overstepped them repeatedly by now, right?
Well, you’re the one to blame for getting yourself into that situation. The first time you notice that someone doesn’t respect your boundaries, you should warn them and let them know that it won’t be tolerated.
The more you allow them to do it, the less respect they’ll have for you and your boundaries. If your friend has crossed the line often, it’s a clear sign of disrespect, which means it’s high time to reset your own boundaries.
Setting healthy boundaries is essential to making any kind of relationship work. It’s a must if you want to maintain a healthy relationship with another human being. And if your friend keeps overstepping your limits, it’s a clear red flag they don’t care enough about you or your friendship.
• Let them know you aren’t okay with their behavior
You need to be open and direct with your friend. Talk to them about the things that bother you in your friendship. Open and honest communication is always the best way to solve some disagreements and issues in close relationships.
Also, don’t do it over social media because this is a serious problem that can’t be solved through texting. If your communication skills aren’t that great and you’re afraid that you cannot have this talk with your friend, there are many other good ways to discuss it with them.
For example, put all your thoughts and feelings regarding your friendship on a piece of paper. Then, ask them to meet and give it to them.
Tell them that you couldn’t talk to them face to face about these issues because you aren’t that good at communicating your problems. Ask them their opinion on your letter and if they are willing to change their behavior towards you to save and maintain your friendship.
• Don’t ever stoop to their level
Even if you notice some clear signs of disrespect in your friendship, you should always respond to it with kindness. You should set an example for the other side of how they should behave towards their friends and other people around them.
Stooping to their level, behaving towards them the same way they’re behaving towards you, would be a very bad thing. It would make your friendship toxic, and it could harm it to the point you won’t be able to fix it.
You own your behavior just as the other side owns theirs. These kinds of people will try to drag you down, but don’t ever allow yourself to fall that low and stoop to their level.
• Focus on yourself for a change
You definitely need to reconsider your friendship with a person who doesn’t respect you at all. But first, you need to shift the focus back to yourself.
Have a deep and honest talk with yourself. Distance yourself from everything and everyone. Take a wellness spa day. Get in touch with your feelings and thoughts.
Dealing with disrespectful people and being in a relationship where the other side continually tries to drag you down can be pretty emotionally draining.
It can also lead to a dysfunctional relationship where you can become codependent on that person. And I hope we all know how destructive and deeply toxic codependency is.
Try to learn a lesson from the situation you’re currently in and focus on your own feelings. Spend more quality time with yourself and try to get in touch with your thoughts and feelings. You deserve it because you’ve been neglecting yourself for too long because of people who didn’t deserve you at all.
• Reach out to your support team
You need to make a support team for yourself. I’m sure you have other close friends you can open up to about these issues that are bothering you. Your close friends will also be able to give you good advice that will surely be helpful in this situation.
The thing is that you really need to have someone to reach out to in times of trouble. We all need to have someone we can open up to and share our worries with.
• Let go of negativity
I know that being disrespected by a good friend or a family member can have a very negative effect on your self-esteem. It can completely change your self-image.
Your friend’s negative vibe affects you, and I know you’re struggling with many negative emotions right now. You’re probably suppressing all those feelings for the sake of your friendship.
That’s a very bad thing because it will have a negative impact on your mental health. You have to learn to let go of those negative feelings, and you need to learn to build some kind of a shield that will protect you from absorbing that negative energy from other people.
• Don’t try to fill the void with a new friend
It’s perfectly understandable if you want to cut your disrespectful friend out of your life. However, replacing them with a new friend won’t be a reasonable decision.
You should surround yourself with people who respect and cherish your presence in their lives but don’t think that you can ever replace your old friend with a new one.
Friendships fade over time. Some people choose to cut us from their lives. We decide to leave some friends behind, and then we meet new ones…
It’s simply the circle of life. However, we connect with different people on different emotional levels, and the point is that our new friends can never be a replacement for our old ones.
• It’s okay to give them a second chance
Don’t be judgemental right away. Maybe your friend is dealing with some problems in their own life, and it’s making them behave in the way they have been towards you.
You should definitely have a serious, honest talk with your friend and ask them what’s going on. Tell them that you aren’t okay with how they’ve been treating you, and then listen to their side of the story.
If they genuinely want to save your friendship, they’ll probably acknowledge that their behavior wasn’t okay at all, and they’ll offer you a sincere apology. You should forgive them and give them a second chance because your friendship definitely deserves it.
• However, let them know it’s their last chance too
We all sometimes say things without thinking about how they may affect the people around us. Occasionally, we hurt our close friends unintentionally. That’s exactly why we all deserve a second chance, and that’s also why you should give it to your friend and forgive them.
However, you really have to emphasize that it’s also their last chance. Be very clear that you won’t tolerate that disrespectful behavior ever again. If you allow them to continue disrespecting you, you’ll only be debasing yourself that way.
The truth is that we all choose the people we want to hang out with. That leads us to the following conclusion: if someone disrespects you and you keep putting up with it, you’re only to blame.
If someone is treating you poorly and ruining your mental health, you can try to warn them that their behavior is becoming intolerable and negatively affecting your friendship. If they don’t take it seriously and keep disrespecting you, you can only end that friendship and move on.
No one is worth losing your peace of mind, believe me. No matter how much you care for someone, if they treat you badly, you need to understand that you would be better off without them and simply cut them out of your life.
I hope this list of signs your friend doesn’t respect you has helped you to realize that you need to leave your toxic friend behind. Don’t let them affect your mental health and wellbeing anymore.
Sometimes we just have to come to terms with the fact that God sends some people into our lives just to teach us a valuable lesson. Once you accept that your toxic friend wasn’t meant to stay in your life forever, it’ll be so easier for you to leave them behind.
Life is so short, and every second is so valuable and precious. Don’t let other people’s negativity affect you, and don’t ever let toxic people waste your precious time.