17 señales innegables de que un hombre casado te está utilizando
When you’re the otra mujersigues buscando señales de que un hombre casado está enamorado de ti. Romantizas tu relación, la ves como amor verdadero, and secretly hope that he’ll end up with you.
But, while you’re busy fantasizing, somehow, you skip the signs a married man is using you! Have you ever considered the idea that this guy couldn’t care less about you, and that you serve him as a distraction from his unhappy marriage?
I don’t mean to be harsh, but sadly, this is a common scenario with mujeres solteras y hombres casados.
Señales de que un hombre casado te está utilizando
If your married man loves you, he’ll never behave like this:
1. Quiere que seas completamente fiel.
Okay, let’s get things sorted out. This man is married – that’s a known fact by now. I won’t go into details of his marriage now because we can never know what happens behind closed doors.
However, one thing is for sure: he’s already in a committed relationship. The truth is that he’s not faithful to his wife, but in some weird way, he’s not faithful to you either – as long as he remains next to his significant other.
Nevertheless, he demands fidelity from you. I’m not just talking about sleeping with other guys.
He expects you to act like you’re in a serious relationship. You’re not allowed to go out on dates or to have dating apps, and he even gets jealous when you mention your mejores amigos o compañeros de trabajo.
This man acts as if he owns you, while you must share him with his wife. How absurd is this? And, you know what’s even worse: the fact that you accept these terms and conditions.
Privarte de la felicidad
Te quiere sólo para él. Oh, how romantic that would be if we could disregard one tiny piece of information: the fact that he can’t offer you his fidelity!
Basically, this man is depriving you of happiness. He is literally stealing years of your life, and as if that wasn’t enough, he steals away every possibility of you meeting someone new and saving yourself.
2. But, he doesn’t leave his wife.
At the same time, he doesn’t do anything about his divorce. If this fact alone isn’t one of the most obvious signs a married man is using you – I don’t know what is. I know he keeps telling you that his divorce will be finalized any time soon.
But, come on… do you really believe him? It’s not that you’re just letting him lie to you; te mientes a ti mismo también.
¿Hizo algo en particular con respecto a su separación? ¿Mencionó siquiera a su mujer que debían separarse?
¿Ha empezado a rehacer su vida? Tal vez necesite encontrar un nuevo lugar donde quedarse o reorganizar sus finanzas para poder pagar la manutención de sus hijos en el futuro.
La respuesta a todas estas preguntas es la misma: he didn’t move an inch for you while you moved mountains for his sake. And, that tells you everything: he won’t leave his wife.
3. No está ahí para ti.
How many holidays did this guy spend by your side? Can you call him when you have an emergency, even if it’s in the middle of the night?
¿Puede aparecer espontáneamente en tu puerta cuando le echas de menos? ¿Puede ser tu acompañante en bodas y otros acontecimientos familiares?
I already know the answers to all of these questions – I just asked them to remind you of reality.
If you sum your entire relationship up, you’ll have to admit that this man is never there for you. You’re pretty much solo en esta relación since you can’t count on him for anything.
He’s not there to hold your hand when you need him to. He’s not there to comfort you when you start crying in the middle of the night.
This man isn’t your friend – he’s just your lover. He’s not the rock you need, and certainly not the one you can rely on. It’s one of the biggest señales de que un hombre casado te está utilizando.
4. No hay conversaciones significativas.
Let’s continue with the questions. Here’s the tough one: When was the last time you had a conversación significativa with this guy? Of course, I’m referring to the topics that don’t concern him.
You have no chance to talk about your personal life. He’s always too busy to hear you out, and he has no time to talk about your feelings.
The bottom line is that he’s probably there por una sola cosael placer físico que le das. Al mismo tiempo, le das la validación que ansía desesperadamente.
He never gives you advice, he is not involved in the things that are bothering you, and he’s never interested in what you have to say. Even when he listens to you, he doesn’t pay attention to what you’re saying.
Aren’t all of these clear signs sólo quiere acostarse contigo ¡porque así es como debería ser una relación amorosa y sana!
5. Evita hablar de divorcio.
Lo peor de toda esta situación es que tu amante ya no quiere hablar de divorcio. Pero, al mismo tiempo, he is obviously not brave enough to tell you straight in the face that he doesn’t plan on changing anything in his love life.
Whenever you bring this topic up, he’s too tired to discuss it right now. He has a lot of things on his mind, and he’s too stressed out to tackle it at this moment.
And, let’s not forget my all-time favorite: acaba acusándote de arruinar vuestros escasos momentos de felicidad juntos.
Did you really have to start with that now when we’re having such a great time?
Sounds familiar, right? As a result, you’re scared to even mention his divorce because you know it will start a fight.
And, just like that – he has you right where he wants you!
6. Te acusa de seducirle.
Have you ever wondered how married men get away with their extramarital affairs? Well, it’s actually pretty simple: they convince their wives that it wasn’t their fault.
This is exactly the way your lover behaves. Even though you’re a single woman and he’s the cheater, he acts like you’re the one who le sedujo.
Isn’t that convenient? It’s like you forced him to be with you, which is certainly not the case.
Básicamente, golpea dos pájaros de un tiro. En primer lugar, se anula a sí mismo de responsabilidad y tiene la conciencia tranquila para seguir comportándose de la misma manera.
En segundo lugar, te echa toda la culpa a ti. If you believe him, you end up destroying your mental health because you can’t help but feel guilty for breaking some innocent woman’s heart.
Well, hear me out on this one. Even though you carry your part of the responsibility for this situation, he’s the one with the wedding ring here… the one breaking his vows, and the one to blame for this mess!
7. Su matrimonio siempre es lo primero.
Sorry to break it to you, but the first place in this man’s life is already taken, and his wife has it. At least, that’s how he acts, which, of course, doesn’t add up to his words.
La conclusión es que te trata como a un segunda opción, and that’s one of the good signs a married man is using you.
His family is his priority. He’ll always run to help out his wife rather than respond to your text message.
Whether you like it or not, he spends most of his free time with her. Let’s talk about New Year parties, Christmases, and Valentine’s Day.
I know he says he doesn’t care about her and that tiene fuertes sentimientos hacia ti, but if that were true, you wouldn’t siempre en segundo lugar¿lo harías?
8. Mentiras y engaños.
If you’re being honest, you’ll admit that this toxic relationship is based on falsas promesasmentiras y engaños.
He doesn’t love his wife, he doesn’t sleep with her, and he’ll leave her anytime now. Cuando los hombres engañan, estas son las mentiras habituales que dicen a sus amantes.
But, let’s talk about little things as well. How many times have you fallen asleep in your prettiest dress, with full makeup on, and with your phone in your hand?
That’s right, I’m talking about all those nights he promised you he’d come to see you, but never showed up.
9. He doesn’t care about your well-being.
Here’s another harsh truth, and one of the good signs a married man is using you. Let’s face it: he rarely takes your well-being into consideration. He doesn’t think about your needs, and he most certainly doesn’t care about you.
¿Cómo afectará toda esta situación a tu vida? ¿Cómo afectará a tu futuro? ¿Te está rompiendo el corazón? ¿Podrás recuperarte algún día de todo este lío?
¿Está arruinada tu salud mental? ¿Cómo curarás tu alma destrozada? ¿Pasarás el resto de tu vida en la posición del otra mujer?
¿Está celoso por tener que compartirlo con su mujer? ¿Qué opina de su relación?
Do you think he worries over any of these questions? I promise you he doesn’t.
After all, this is quite obvious. This is not the man who brings you hot soup when you’re sick nor does he hold your hand when you need his emotional support.
He’s selfishy sólo se preocupa por sí mismo.
10. You’re not his only extramarital affair.
Cuando los hombres engañan, rara vez se detienen en una sola mujer. En el fondo, sabes que tu amante tiene muchas otras aventuras con otras chicas solteras o incluso casadas.
¿Qué pasa con todos esos mensajes de texto y llamadas telefónicas que sigue recibiendo? ¿Y el hecho de que esconda su teléfono o desaparezca misteriosamente de tu vida?
Of course, he can always tell you that he’s spending his free time with his wife, but trust me, this kind of behavior is a warning sign that he’s cheating on you con una tercera mujer.
I don’t mean to be harsh, but it’s something you could have seen coming. He’s clearly a tramposo en serie, and what’s even worse, he doesn’t see anything wrong about it!
11. You’re just convenient.
Every married man wants the same: a woman who won’t ask him too many questions and who’ll always be available when he feels like seeing her. Well, I hate to break it to you, but this is exactly how your lover sees you.
Si te trata como you’re convenient, it’s because he doesn’t love you. Instead, he’s with you because you give him everything he needs.
You’re a distraction from his boring married life. He doesn’t have to make future plans with you because, let’s face it, ustedes dos no tienen futuro.
You’re in no position to ask him anything, and he doesn’t have to be committed to your relationship. Besides, he gets to sleep with you, which is a huge bonus.
And, let’s not forget one of the most important things: you give him the validation he needs. He is still the man he used to be. His seducing skills are in perfect order.
Le disparas la autoestima. ¡Se ve a sí mismo como un macho que tiene a dos mujeres peleándose por él!
12. Te esconde del resto del mundo.
This guy never let you in his life. I’m not saying that he should arrange a meeting between you and his family. However, if he really plans on getting a divorce, or if he was really working on it, he wouldn’t hide you from everyone in his life.
And, that’s exactly what your married man is doing. Even if someone he knows catches you together, his body language instantly changes and he becomes emotionally distant and cold.
He’s doing this because he doesn’t see your relationship as anything more than a casual fling. He’ll probably forget about you soon, and he doesn’t need anyone reminding him of your existence.
Besides, it’s easier to get rid of you when the time comes if you’re not involved in his life.
13. Un maniático del control.
When a married man falls in love with a single woman, he knows he doesn’t deserve her. The same goes with your toxic relationship: your lover is very well aware that you could replace him for someone better (and, most importantly, single) in the blink of an eye.
Por lo tanto, se convierte en un maniático del control en un intento de evitar que esto ocurra. Tiene arrebatos de celos, comprueba todos tus movimientos e incluso empieza a acecharte.
Revisa tu teléfono, quiere que borres todos tus perfiles en las redes sociales e intenta decirte qué hacer con tu vida.
Si esto es algo con lo que se puede identificar, por favor, véalo como una bandera roja de un manipulador de control. It’s likely that he won’t leave you alone even if you try to walk away.
Just have one thing in mind: he’s not behaving like this because te quiere – this man feels like he owns you!
14. Te manipula para que te quedes.
When a married man cares about you, he doesn’t want you to leave him – obviously. However, manipulating you into staying is a new level of toxicity.
Cada vez que intentas alejarte, él encuentra una manera de recuperarte. De repente, se pone enfermo y los médicos llegan a decirle que podría tratarse de algo grave.
Or, he shows up, begging you not to leave him. He promises that he’ll change, and that everything will fall in perfect order.
If that doesn’t work, he plays with your consciousness. He goes even as far as telling you that he’ll do something to himself if you break up with him – a true example of chantaje emocional.
Este hombre claramente sabe cómo provocarte. Él juega con tu cabeza y terminas haciendo exactamente lo que él quiere.
15. Todo sucede bajo sus reglas.
A veces, you feel as if you are just a passive bystander in this relationship. Or, maybe you’re a puppet without your own free will.
En cualquier caso, la cuestión es que todo, y quiero decir literalmente todo, ocurre bajo sus reglas.
There is a scheduled time during which you can text him, you only visit the hidden, dark places where no one can see you. You meet when it’s convenient for him.
Basically, you do whatever he wants because you’re aterrorizada de perderlo. You have no saying regarding your relationship, and he definitely doesn’t treat you as his equal.
16. You’re his dumping site.
¿Está descontento con su vida matrimonial? ¿Tiene problemas con sus hijos? ¿Está atravesando una crisis financiera? ¿O tal vez su salud mental está destruida?
Bueno, en ese caso, debería trabajar en resolver sus problemas. O debería buscarse un psiquiatra.
Sin embargo, en lugar de eso, te utiliza como vertedero. Te cuenta todos sus problemas, vierte todo su equipaje y se quita todo el peso de encima.
In the meantime, you’re always there to hear him out. After all, where would you go? You’re full of understanding, and you never fail to give him a solution to all of his troubles.
It wouldn’t surprise me if he had the nerve to ask you for relationship advice regarding his marriage – if we’re being honest, that’s the only thing that’s left for you to solve on his behalf.
Y, ¿qué pasa después de consolarlo? Pues que vuelve a su vida idílica, liberado del estrés.
If this isn’t one of the sure signs a married man is using you, I don’t know what is.
17. Tu instinto te lo dice.
Finally, there are some things that are difficult to explain. You can see it in his body language, his tone of voice, or when you two have eye contact – this man doesn’t love you and he never did.
Al principio, pensabas que te estabas imaginando todas estas señales de que un hombre casado te está utilizando, pero cuando te pones a pensarlo, su intuición siempre tuvo razón.
Véase también: 25 señales de que un hombre te está utilizando por dinero que no deberías ignorar
¿Cómo saber si un hombre casado es infeliz en su matrimonio?
Un hombre infelizmente casado use every excuse possible to run away from his wife, and he’ll avoid spending time with her at all costs.
Este es el tipo que siempre aconseja a todos los solteros de su entorno que nunca se casen porque les espera el infierno. También, se queja de su mujer todo el tiempo.
Of course, there are men who deliberately act this way to deceive you. They’ll lie that they’re infelices en su matrimonio para justificar sus actividades extramatrimoniales.
¿Cómo consigues que un hombre casado te eche de menos?
Si quieres hacer que un hombre casado te eche de menos, tienes que dejar de ser tan disponible. He’s used to having you around whenever he feels like it, and it’s about time he sees that you’re a real person – not his puppet who comes on demand.
No mantengas contacto y haz que se preocupe perderte for good. Once he feels your absence, he’ll realize he can’t live without you.
Para terminar:
Look… I’m not here to judge. But, if you’ve seen all the signs a married man is using you, what are you still doing by his side?
I know it’s easy for me to tell you to déjalo. Lo más difícil es seguir adelante. Sin embargo, sabes que no es el hombre con el que puedes hacer planes de futuro.
Odio tener que decírtelo, pero la situación entre vosotros dos nunca cambiará. No tienes más remedio que irte mientras estés a tiempo.
