Is your relationship moving too fast but feels right? Haven’t we all been there? I know I have. And even though it was probably the most hypnotizing feeling in the world, the overthinker in me couldn’t help but worry.
Is this a good or bad thing? What if I get my heart broken? Is this a fairytale? Can something like this even be real? Should I be careful? Or should I enjoy the moment, no questions asked?
I bet you’re also struggling with the same questions. Well, luckily, I’ve got you covered. Here is everything you need to know if your new relationship is moving too quickly.
5 Meanings Behind A Relationship Moving Too Fast But Feels Right
Is your relationship moving too fast but feels right? What could possibly be the reason behind it? Well, I’ll give you all the hidden meanings behind this situation.
1. Love bombing
I’ll start with the worst-case scenario right away. I hate to break it to you, but there is a great possibility that your significant other is love-bombing you.
They’re doing their best to prove your compatibility and convince you that you two are meant to be. They told you they loved you before you even reached your first month anniversary, and they practically invited you to move in with them right after the first date.
This person appears to be enchanted by you. No matter what you say or do, it always knocks them off their feet.
You’re everything they have been looking for their entire life, and now when they finally find you, they don’t plan on letting you go.
Sounds like a real-life fairytale, doesn’t it? Well, I bet you’ll want to slow things down once you find out this is also a narcissistic manipulation technique.
Of course, this alleged love bombing is not enough to accuse someone of having NPD. However, let this inspire you to check out other red flags of narcissism.
2. You’re soulmates
No, you’re not a hopeless romantic for believing that your new relationship is actually a soul bond. If you’re into spirituality, you know that this can only mean one thing: you two have been searching for each other since your past lives.
And now that you’ve finally run into your soulmate, it’s no wonder that you don’t want to take things slow. Why would you, after all? You’ve known each other for an eternity – it’s not like you’re strangers.
Yes, your bodies might have just met in this reality, but your souls are old acquaintances. Therefore, you shouldn’t worry about your relationship moving too fast but what feels right.
You might not be aware of it, but your soul recognized theirs. You both know this is the real deal, so there is absolutely no point in waiting “enough time” for important relationship milestones.
3. You’ve learned your lessons
Your past relationships have left a strong imprint on your personality and love life. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying that you still love your ex or something like that.
But whether you like it or not, they have affected you and changed your perception of romance. While some people are left unable to love after a traumatic experience, with you, it’s the opposite.
Finally, you know what you want. And more importantly, you know what you don’t want. You’ve gotten rid of your toxic relationship behavior patterns and mastered the art of a happy partnership.
And your significant other has done the same. I guess you’ve both learned your lessons. You’ve realized that you had to go through all those lousy relationships to become the best possible versions of yourselves.
Basically, your heartbreaks helped you grow as a person. They helped you mature and, consequently, helped you turn into a better romantic partner.
Now, you don’t see the point in waiting. Instead, you and your SO decided to join forces and invest all of your energy into your future goals.
4. You’re both open and mature
Sometimes, it might only seem like your relationship is moving too fast, but it’s actually just the pace of a healthy relationship. This happens when both you and your partner are open to healthy communication.
You tell them exactly what you expect from them, and vice versa. When something is wrong, you resolve the issue right away.
While many couples spend the entire first month of their relationship (and sometimes even much longer) playing cat and mouse, you two have already figured everything out. These immature, dishonest couples waste a lot of energy on sending mixed signals and playing mind games and hard to get.
In the meantime, you and your significant other were too busy building a life together. For some, that might look as if your relationship is moving too quickly.
Nevertheless, this is just proof that you’ve invested your time, energy, and effort in the best possible way. And you’re just reaping the fruits of your labor.
5. A rebound relationship
Sadly, this is another thing nobody wants to hear, especially when they’re crazy in love. However, it’s an option I have to warn you about.
One of the reasons your relationship is moving too fast is because it’s nothing but a rebound relationship. Your partner ended their long-term relationship not too long ago.
Naturally, they’re used to being in a committed and serious romance, which is exactly what they want from you on your first date.
Basically, this person is trying to continue exactly where they left off. Deep down, they haven’t accepted their breakup just yet.
That’s right, on some level, they’re pretending to still be in a relationship with their ex. You’re just here to fill in for them.
I hate to tell you this, but your partner doesn’t see you as an actual person. Instead, you’re just a tool that is here to help them heal faster or make their ex jealous. Either way, you know what you should do.
6 Things To Do If Your Relationship Is Moving Too Fast
If your relationship is passing the speed limit, here is how you should act about it:
1. Allow yourself to be happy
First of all, please don’t deprive yourself of happiness. I know it’s scary. I know that you keep thinking about failure without allowing yourself to fly.
This sounds silly, but if you come to think of it, happiness is outside of your comfort zone. You’re not used to it, and you’re self-sabotaging your relationship.
You keep coming up with the worst possible scenarios in your head, trying to prepare yourself for what you think is an inevitable breakup. Even though this relationship feels incredible, and you don’t actually mind the pace it’s going, your anxiety gets to you every time.
That’s why I’m asking you to allow yourself to be happy. What’s the worst thing that can happen?
2. Set boundaries
However, this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t set some healthy boundaries right from the start. Show your partner what’s acceptable and what you will never tolerate.
For example, you don’t have to make all big decisions in your life with them. You don’t have to introduce them to your friends and family if you don’t feel comfortable doing so.
The list of examples is endless, but I’m sure you get the point.
The bottom line is not to mirror their behavior. Just because your partner has told you they love you doesn’t mean you have to as well. The same goes for all the other important relationship milestones.
3. Don’t forget about your own life
Having a good quality romantic relationship is awesome. But I don’t care how in love you are, never forget the most important relationship in your life: the one you have with yourself.
Whatever you do, don’t forget about your own life. You can be the best possible girlfriend/boyfriend in the world, but that doesn’t mean that you cease to exist outside of your relationship.
You’re still a friend, a son/daughter, a sibling, a career man/woman… You’re still you.
So please, don’t forget about the things that make only YOU happy. Feel like binge-watching your favorite TV show, but your partner isn’t a fan? So what? Why wouldn’t you watch it by yourself?
Want to talk to your friend without your SO around? As you should! Ask them out and have a blast without them.
What about your hobbies? Who said you couldn’t enjoy them just because your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t share the same interests?
4. Honest communication
Here’s some relationship advice: healthy communication is the key to a healthy relationship. This is especially important if you’re wondering why your relationship is moving too fast but feels right.
You and your partner are only getting to know each other. They’re not a mind reader, and they have no way of guessing what you want and expect from them. They can’t possibly know if you’re offended or hurt by something – that is, unless you tell them.
Of course, it goes both ways. That is why it’s crucial to practice honest and open communication.
For example, if you feel like you need to slow things down a bit, it’s also something you should tell your partner directly.
5. Wait for your first fight
When my relationship was moving too fast, I heard some relationship advice telling me to wait for our first fight. And at a glance, I thought of it as absurd.
However, when I came to think about it, the person who told me this was absolutely right. I mean, it’s easy to be happy when everything is going great.
But most of us show our real faces when we’re angry and upset. So, please don’t avoid this argument.
It will happen sooner or later. And trust me when I tell you the last thing you want to do is sweep the problems under the rug. Because when they explode, it will be anything but nice.
You need to see how you both act while fighting. How often will you fight? Will there be insults? Will your ego be more important than your relationship?
How will you make up? Are you able to compromise?
Only when you have the answers to all of these questions will you be able to tell if you really are on the right track or if this was nothing but the honeymoon phase all along.
6. Take a step back
Don’t get me wrong – I’m not telling you to take a break from your relationship or to break things off. Instead, I’m only advising you to take a step back.
I know that you love spending time with your SO. But try not seeing them for a day or two. It will give you a better perspective on things.
It will give you a chance to think things through without being constantly influenced by them. It will help you be more realistic and objective. And that’s exactly what you need at this point.
4 Signs Your Relationship Is Moving Too Fast (And You Should Be Worried)
I know that you’re in a “relationship moving too fast but feels right” kind of situation. However, if you can relate to most of the things mentioned above, maybe you should be worried after all.
1. Unlimited trust
Trusting your partner is a great thing. In fact, you can’t have a healthy relationship if there is no trust.
However, don’t forget that, as in love as you are with this person, they’re still a stranger to you. You don’t know their habits, you know nothing about their past relationships, and you haven’t gotten the chance to see the core of their being yet.
That is why it’s absurd to have unlimited trust in them. You don’t have to check their every move, but if you trust them blindly, it’s one of the signs your relationship is moving too fast, and you’re definitely not seeing things for what they are.
2. You’ve lost yourself
Another red flag is the fact that you no longer exist as an individual outside of your romance. You only hang out with your mutual friends, you’ve given up the hobbies they don’t enjoy, and you’ve even stopped listening to the music they don’t like.
It’s one thing to meet your partner halfway, but letting them erase your personality is something else.
This is especially alarming if you’ve become their clone. All of a sudden, you like their favorite color the most, and you prefer spending time with their friends and family over yours.
If this is something you can relate to, you’re likely being manipulated.
3. Your lives are too intertwined
Everyone in your surroundings has noticed the same thing: you two are spending too much time together. You’re only apart when you’re at work.
Even when you’re out with someone else, you have to send your partner a text message every two minutes. You invite them to hang out with your friends all the time, and you don’t make phone calls with your loved ones when they’re not present.
It’s nice that you’ve included each other in your lives. However, all of this looks like you’ve also become emotionally dependent on one another, which is never healthy.
It looks like it’s time to take your own life back into your own hands.
4. You’re afraid to say “no”
You’re usually not a people pleaser, but you’re ready to do whatever it takes to please your partner. And I’m not only talking about your efforts to make them happy.
I’m referring to the fact that you’re scared to tell them “no.” Maybe you would like to slow it down, but you’re afraid that they’ll take it the wrong way.
They ask you to meet their friends and family, and you agree to it even though you think it’s too soon. They ask you to move in together, and you say yes, even though it doesn’t fit into your plans.
What will you do if they ask you to marry them? Will you tie the knot without being certain in your decision, just to please them?
Is It OK If A Relationship Moves Fast?
One thing is for sure: your relationship shouldn’t be moving too fast. It’s great that you and your significant other are so in love with each other, but you have to get to know each other before reaching certain important milestones.
Remember, there is a difference between being in love and loving someone. And every relationship coach will tell you the same: you should love someone to move in with them or get married. Being in love is not enough for such a huge step.
On the other hand, this doesn’t mean that all relationships that move fast fail. There are tons of stories of couples who moved in after the first date and lived happily ever after.
At the end of the day, every scenario is unique and different. Nobody can guarantee how your new relationship will end up. Sometimes, you just have to risk it and see where it goes.
What To Do If You Feel Like A Relationship Is Moving Too Fast
If you feel like your relationship is moving too fast, it means that you’re not happy about it. Whether you like to admit it or not, you’re concerned about its future, and you would like to slow it down.
First and foremost, you have to admit this to yourself. There is nothing wrong with feeling this way. It most certainly doesn’t mean that you’re not in love with your partner or that you’re not as invested in your love story as they are.
You just need more time to feel comfortable. Or maybe you’re an overthinker and have trust issues, which is also perfectly okay.
The next step is to be honest and open with your significant other about your dilemmas. Tell him that you aren’t thinking about breaking up – you would just feel better if you took things slower.
Is It A Red Flag If Someone Moves Fast?
Even though this doesn’t necessarily have to be a red flag, it can be a sign of love bombing. In that case, you’re dealing with a narcissist, and you have no other choice but to run for your life.
Another red flag hidden behind a relationship moving too fast is the possibility of your new partner hiding something. They’ve gotten into a new relationship, and it’s perfectly natural that they will present themselves in the best possible light.
Basically, they’re trying to rush you into a big decision, such as moving in together, getting married, or even having kids, without giving you enough time to see their true colors. They know that you’ll have a harder time walking away after all that happens, even if you realize you don’t like what you’re seeing.
How Long Do Rushed Relationships Last?
According to some relationship experts, rushed relationships normally last around a year max. This amount of time is enough for most couples to get to know each other well and for the honeymoon phase to be over.
When you both reveal your true personalities and when you both take off your rose-tinted glasses, it’s likely the relationship will break apart.
However, this is not always the case. Some people see a year as enough time to really grow to love each other, so they stay together even after the honeymoon phase is over.
To Wrap Up:
Is your relationship moving fast but feels right? In that case, please don’t listen to relationship advice from your friends and family. I know they mean well, but they can’t possibly know what’s going on behind closed doors.
Actually, the only thing you should follow here is your gut. Do your best to chase away your anxiety and overthinking. But don’t allow the hopeless romantic inside of you to trick you, either.
Dive deep inside yourself and discover what you feel. What is your intuition telling you for real? Does it really feel that right?
If the answer is yes, enjoy your happiness and don’t let anyone ruin it.