Actuamos como una pareja, pero no somos oficiales: Por qué y qué hacer
‘We act like a couple, but we are not official’… I swear these types of relationships have become a trend nowadays.
Estar atascado en un situación realmente apesta. That relationship limbo can drive a person crazy because you can’t let go, and, on the other hand, you’re afraid that you’re wasting your time on something that will never become a serious relationship.
However, I’m here today as your savior because I’ll help you find a way out. And I don’t mean out-out, like ending it all forever. On the contrary, I mean, I’ll guide you through the process of transforming your situationship into a real, relación sana.
Actuamos como una pareja, pero no somos oficiales: 9 razones POR LAS QUE
There are a few possible reasons why you two behave like a real couple but still haven’t defined it as a relación real . So, let’s start with the first and most common one:
1. El miedo al compromiso
Puede ser simplemente que you’re dealing with a commitment-phobe. They’re probably interested in you, but relaciones comprometidas darles un susto de muerte.
Maybe it’s their primera vez enamorarse de alguien so hard, and that feeling is unknown to them, which scares them. On the other hand, it may also be because they’re afraid to leave their single life behind.
Su miedo al compromiso también puede deberse a heridas emocionales del pasado. Quizá fueron en una relación comprometida antes, y les dejó con el corazón roto.
2. Puede que simplemente estén confundidos
As I said, maybe it’s the first time they’ve caught deep feelings for someone, and they don’t know what to do or how to behave.
Perhaps they already consider it a real relationship and think you feel that way too. On the other hand, they may be waiting for you to make the first move because they aren’t sure what that should be.
3. Tienen problemas de autoestima
Hombres con baja autoestima tienen estas dificultades cuando se trata de su vida amorosa. They feel they don’t deserve the other person, and that’s why it takes them so long dar el primer paso y hacer las cosas oficiales.
Piensan que la otra persona nunca entraría en una relación seria with them, so that’s why they avoid talking about it. Their poor self-confidence doesn’t allow them to see themselves how their significant other does.
4. They’re only using you
Unfortunately, this is also a very common case. They stay by your side only because it’s convenient for them.
They can’t build a relación sana with you because they don’t plan on staying with you for too long. As long as you’re giving them the perks of being in a fun relationship, they’ll be there. However, the first time your relationship runs into some issues, he’ll turn his back on you for good.
5. Lo consideran amigos con derecho a roce
If you’re a teenager or still in high school, this is probably the cause of your situación. Your ‘partner’ thinks you’re in una relación de amigos con derecho a roce, and they’re perfectly okay with that.
Por lo tanto, si desea oficialice su relacióntienes que dejar de darles esos beneficios. Deja de contestar su llamada de botín, and you’ll see that things will start to change.
6. Past relationship baggage doesn’t allow them to be exclusive
¿Qué sabes de sus ex parejas y relaciones? If they dated someone for a long time before they met you, it could be a red flag that they didn’t get proper closer from that relationship.
The unfortunate truth is that they’ll never be able to build a new relationship as long as they struggle with that carga emocional.
7. They’re afraid of getting hurt
¿Sabes algo de su historia sentimental? ¿Cómo terminó su relación anterior? ¿Estaban en una relación duradera before you that didn’t end well?
If they told you that their ex-boyfriend/girlfriend hurt them, maybe they’re afraid you’ll do the same to them.
They don’t want to pasar por otro desamor, and they think that by not putting labels on your relationship, they’ll manage to protect themselves.
8. They don’t want to get out of the ‘dating pool’
This doesn’t mean they’re seeing someone else, but they might be texting with someone on social media or having fun on dating apps. The point is that they aren’t ready to give up on all of that.
They aren’t ready to give up on their single life. They still want to meet new people and hang out with them, and they know it wouldn’t be possible if they get into a committed relationship with you.
9. They think you’re okay with how things are
If you’ve never talked to them about taking your ‘relationship’ to the next level, it’s completely normal that they think you’re satisfied with how things are right now.
And you shouldn’t expect them to make that move of defining su situación sentimental because they think it’s not something you want. Also, you can’t accuse them that they’re using you because the truth is, you’ve willingly accepted staying in this type of relationship.
¿Cómo se llama cuando se actúa como pareja pero no se sale?
En realidad hay varios nombres para estos tipos de relaciones , but in most cases, it’s simply called a situación. It’s when you’re more than friends but less than a couple.
También puede etiquetarse como relación indefinida o el limbo de las relaciones. You have most of the relationship perks, but still, one or both of you don’t feel ready to put a real label on it.
Véase también: Señales de que estás saliendo extraoficialmente: ¿Seguir adelante o DTR?
¿Puede una situación convertirse en una relación?
Of course, they can, but it’s up to you two and how hard both of you really want it. If you’re okay with hooking up from time to time, you probably won’t ever become a real couple.
Sin embargo, si habéis captado sentimientos el uno por el otro y estáis dispuestos a trabajar para establecer una conexión emocionalCon el tiempo, su relación sentimental se transformará en una relación romántica real y definida.
Ya sabes lo que se dice: el tiempo dirá. Mientras tanto, vuestro único trabajo es conoceros mejor y centraros en construir unos cimientos sólidos para una relación sana.
9 pasos a seguir para convertir una situación sentimental en una relación real
‘Actuamos como una pareja, pero no somos oficiales.’… Espero que sea la última vez que dices esto porque los consejos sobre relaciones que te damos a continuación te ayudarán construir un relación definida de su actual situación.
1. Déjales entrar en tu mundo
Si realmente quieres ser exclusivo, tienes que formar parte de su mundo y viceversa. If you don’t welcome each other into your worlds, you’ll never be able to establish healthy grounds for a real relationship.
Comuníquense. Conózcanse. Comparta algunas de sus experiencias y recuerdos personales. Haced que formen parte de vuestro proceso de toma de decisiones. Apoyaos y motivaros mutuamente para alcanzar vuestros objetivos y convertiros en mejores versiones de vosotros mismos.
2. Deja atrás tus inseguridades
If you allow your insecurities and your mental health or self-esteem issues to stand between you, the fact is, you’ll never be able to develop and maintain a healthy relationship.
Tienes que ser consciente de ti mismo, de tus perfecciones, cualidades y valores. ¿Qué clase de persona podría dejar ir a alguien como tú? Sólo así deberías pensar.
Si la otra persona se da cuenta de que usted lucha con s problemas de autoconcienciapodrían usarlo para utilizarte como quieran. Y eso es algo que nunca debes permitir que nadie haga.
3. Acercarse a sus amigos íntimos
If you can’t get them to talk about their feelings for you, you should try to find out from your mutual friends. Or, even better, you should try to get close to their best friends and find out that information from them. I know that sounds pretty hard, but it’ll be worth it, believe me.
Of course, you should also introduce them to your close friends and family members. That’s how you’ll show them that your intentions regarding them and your relationship are serious.
4. Intenta conectar a un nivel más profundo
Ábranse los unos a los otros. Si quieres desarrollar un vínculo fuerte, compartir tus emociones, recuerdos y algunas historias profundas de tu vida es la mejor manera de hacerlo.
También, de la mano en público, compartir una afición divertida y viajar juntos también pueden ayudar a formar una conexión emocional firme. Los vínculos fuertes y las conexiones emocionales son, de hecho, los cimientos más importantes a la hora de construir una relación sana.
5. Pasar tiempo juntos es IMPRESCINDIBLE
Acude a citas más a menudo. Queda con los amigos que tengáis en común, pero dedica tiempo a estar a solas.
It’s not like you should spend all of your free time together but spending quality time together often will definitely strengthen your bond.
6. Presta atención a sus necesidades Y límites
Si tu pareja aún no está preparada para hacer las cosas oficiales, debes ser paciente y mostrarte comprensivo. You won’t get anything by forcing things. On the contrary, it may only blow up in your face.
En cuanto a eso, si hey quiero y necesito algo de tiempo a solas, you should let them have it. By respecting their need for personal space and alone time, you’ll show them how caring and understanding you are, which will make them fall hard for you.
7. Deja que tus acciones muestren tus verdaderos sentimientos
Words alone won’t help you to consigue que tu pareja se comprometa contigo. You can tell them those three almost meaningless words, ‘Te quiero,’ but it still won’t be enough for them to make your relationship official.
You know why? Because words don’t mean a thing if they aren’t supported through actions. In other words, you can tell them you love them, but it really doesn’t have any deep meaning if you don’t show it to them.
8. Don’t be afraid of ‘the talk’
If the other person doesn’t take any serious steps, you should be the one to make the first move. Simply put, ask them to have the talk.
La charla definirá tu relación o acabará con ella de una vez por todas. It won’t be easy, but it’s probably the only way to solve your current situation. Suertey espero que su conversación tenga un final feliz.
9. If they don’t want to be exclusive, stop giving them the perks of being in a relationship
If your girl/guy friend keeps avoiding making things official between you, the only choice you have is to stop behaving like you’re in a relationship. Es decir, debes dejar de darles los beneficios de estar en una relación.
It’s actually the only way to determine whether they really have honest feelings for you or are only playing with you. If they stay and commit to you, they’re in love with you.
On the flip side, if they end it all between you, it’s a clear sign they never even genuinely cared for you. It may be difficult for you to accept it initially, but after some time, you’ll realize that it was really for the best.
One day, you’ll meet la persona adecuada, someone who’ll be proud to enter into a relationship with you and put a clear label on it from day one – a healthy, serious, and committed relationship.
Why Does He Act Like My Boyfriend But Won’t Commit?
Honestly, there might be a few reasons why your man keeps you close but isn’t ready to enter a committed relationship. It may be because he’s simply afraid of commitment or because he’s already in a relationship with someone else.
Also, it could be because he isn’t quite sure how he feels about you or, on the other hand, he isn’t sure you’re serious about him. Of course, he may also be using you or simply be okay with such una relación casual e indefinida.
However, one thing is for sure, he’s keeping you close because he doesn’t want to lose you.
You shouldn’t give up on him immediately. Give him time, and maybe you’ll manage to figure out his true intentions.
Reflexiones finales
I sincerely hope I’ve managed to solve your ‘we act like a couple, but we are not official yet’ situationship dilemma. Or, at least, I hope I’ve helped you figure out a way to solve it.
The good thing is that you definitely aren’t in a hopeless situation. If there is love, there’s a huge possibility that it’ll turn into a real, healthy relationship one day.
Por otro lado, si realmente dura demasiado tiempo, deberías ponerle fin y dejar ir a esa persona. Understand that they aren’t the right person for you, and stop wasting your precious time on someone who isn’t sure about your position in their life.
