Cómo dejar de pensar demasiado en una relación (9 pasos para lograrlo)

Dicen que no hay nada en este mundo que pueda perturbarte tanto como tus propios pensamientos. Well, that’s true just like it’s true that there is nothing that can harm the bond between two partners than the ugly hábito de pensar demasiado en una relación.

Y, el verdadero lío se crea una vez que tus inseguridades empiezan a nadar hacia la superficie sin tu propia voluntad.

Although it’s your life we’re talking about, sometimes it feels to you like you don’t have control over your thoughts, does it?

Nobody is going to ask you why you do it… It’s not like you want to overanalyze everything, it’s just the way you are.

No dejas de pensar y obsesionado sobre esto una y otra vez.

And, your thoughts get deeper and deeper until you’ve taken into consideration all the circumstances, events, and possibilities that could occur.

In the end, there are so many different case scenarios racing in your head, and you start being afraid of something that didn’t even happen, but you’ve predicted it might happen.

¿Qué es un pensador excesivo en una relación?

Let’s just consider overthinking as a salud mental condición. Entonces, un pensador excesivo es una persona que padece esa enfermedad.

This is a person who can’t stop obsesionado y sobreanalizando even some pretty clear and simple things or the things they absolutely can’t control.

It’s like they constantly have that fear of being hurt, and it makes them rethink every single decision they make or step they take.

It’s the person that simply doesn’t want to tomar cosas a su valor nominal. Their mind is filled with constant ‘what ifs’ and they’re always looking for some answers.

That’s a person whose lenguaje corporal muestra hasta qué punto su autoestima is. They go from relationship to relationship, and can’t easily settle anywhere because of their own insecurities.

El pensamiento sobreanalizador patrón es una característica del apego ansioso estilo. Esto suele deberse a cargas de relaciones anteriores que la pareja lleva consigo a la relación actual.

¿Es normal pensar demasiado en una relación?

Well, I would say that it’s actually a very common part of relaciones románticas. Sin embargo, sobreanalizando no es ni puede ser nunca un calidad de un relación sana.

If you know you’re prone to overthinking and don’t even try to control it, it’ll be like you’re consciously trying to sabotea tu propia relación.

It’s also a señal de que tienes problemas de confianza, meaning you don’t completely trust your romantic partner. Just try to think how your partner feels when they know you’re overanalyzing every single thing and decision in your relationship.

It surely makes them feel awful. It surely arouses many doubts about your relationship with them. And, it’ll sooner or later make them think that you don’t love them as much as they love you.

Replanteamiento de y pensar demasiado en una relación es sin duda una bandera roja que algo está mal.

Whether it is a lack of trust, love, or respect is irrelevant. The important thing is that it’s obvious that your relationship is definitely lacking something.

Truth be told, the hidden meaning behind overthinking is ‘I’m doubting our love and I don’t know if I can trust you completely’. Don’t be surprised if this starts to bother your partner.

Así que, para evitar que el exceso de análisis plague tu relación, hay algunas límites que deben nombrarse cuanto antes.

Tienes que encontrar la manera de poner fin a esos tóxicos e irracionales patrones de pensamiento y trabaja para establecer una comunicación sana con tu pareja.

Turn to a relationship expert and try to get that outside perspective. Talk it out with your partner instead of obsessing about things you can’t control by yourself.

Cómo dejar de pensar demasiado en una relación

The truth is, we can’t stop being overthinkers. We hate it, and we’re aware of all the negative consequences it has on our social and vida amorosa, but we still can’t take an eraser and remove that trait from our personality.

However, we definitely can control that bad habit of overthinking and stop it from ruining the relationships we have with other people. And, that’s exactly what I’ll teach you below.

Take a deep breath and let’s start with the mission of arreglar y salvar su relación sentimental de sobreanalizar las cosas.

1. Primero, calma tu mente

You don’t let yourself enjoy anything that happens in your life. There is this shadow growing slowly and it’s leaning over everything.

Puede que al principio parezcas feliz, pero tus pensamientos excesivos están demasiado presentes.

It creates this fear that all at once, everything you have or everything you’re living and enjoying might disappear or might even be a lie.

It’s a normal thing that you’re panicking because you siento que el mundo entero se desmorona bajo tus pies.

You can’t stop thinking about the future of your relationship and whether your loved one will be by your side forever or if they’ll leave you sooner or later. The truth is, we all have that same fear of the unknown, and we all catch ourselves thinking about it sometimes.

Sin embargo, el hecho innegable es que nada es constante en la vida. Hay cosas que simplemente escapan a tu control, y lo único que puedes hacer al respecto es aceptarlas y aceptarlas.

Dejar de pensar demasiado because that surely won’t help – sólo pueden surgir algunos problemas más profundos. Necesita recupere el control sobre su mente. Identificar y vencer esos pensamientos no deseados.

2. Confía en ti mismo

Pensar demasiado no sólo puede causar problemas en su amar la vidapero también puede tener un mal impacto en todos los ámbitos de su vida. Y, ¿sabes cuál es la razón principal de ese mal hábito tuyo?

You don’t trust yourself. You don’t believe in yourself. You aren’t aware nor do you believe in your own capabilities.

You can’t stop overthinking every little thing in your relationship and in your life in general simply because you constantly feel like you’re doing something wrong.

You feel like you’re making mistakes all the time.

And, sometimes you even think that you’re a mistake.

You feel like you don’t deserve to be loved, and somehow, you manage to convince yourself that you’re not indeed despite all the efforts your partner makes to convince you of the opposite.

Si cometió errores en su relación anterior, you can’t allow them to sabotage your new happiness. Todos cometemos errores y, a veces, hacemos daño a nuestros seres queridos unintentionally, but that doesn’t make us indigno de amor.

Sea amable consigo mismo. Don’t judge your wrong decisions and moves. Don’t punish yourself for having weaknesses.

Necesita construir un relación sana con uno mismo para poder hacerlo con otro ser humano. Start by learning to trust yourself and then you’ll learn how to trust others, too.

3. Y, lo que es más importante, confía en tu pareja

For some reason, you’ve stopped believing that people are capable of doing good without hidden motives. You just keep waiting to see what’s really hiding behind their deeds, and what kind of intentions they really have.

As far as your relationship is concerned, you love. You really do. But, you always question if you’re really loved.

If there was an amazing week that helped you feel like the most loved person, you’re just waiting for a crash to happen in the next few days. Even if your significant other has never given you a reason to doubt them and their intentions, you simply can’t relax 100%.

You probably still snoop through their text messages, even after you’ve been together for so long. Am I right? Well, it’s obvious you’re struggling with profundo problemas de confianza que te hacen propenso a sobreanalizando, que está arruinando lentamente vuestra relación.

After all, you can’t call it a healthy relación if you don’t trust each other completely. Donde no hay confianza, tampoco hay amor.

Su desconfianza definitivamente hace que su sensación de pareja sin respeto y probablemente incluso sin amor. If you don’t give them the chance to prove you’re trustworthy, it’s just a matter of time when they’ll break up with you.

4. Permítete ser vulnerable

You’re just a human being, and vulnerabilidad emocional forma parte de tu naturaleza. Deja de ocultarlo.

Tienes que desnudarte emocionalmente delante de tu pareja. Right now, you might be afraid that they’ll use it at some point to hurt you.

But, what if they don’t? What if they start to cherish and appreciate you even more because of it? What if it connects you in a way you never thought was possible before?

You see, these are the ‘what ifs’ you need to focus on.

You can’t pretend you’re somebody else forever. Sooner or later, your mask will come off and it’ll leave your partner too confused.

5. Habla en voz alta sobre cómo te sientes

Don’t be afraid to pour your fears out in the open. Don’t go through it alone.

Even if it’s just in your head, he (or she) can reassure you in a minute and make your fears go away.

Puedes convencerte fácilmente de que te quieren de verdad, de que hay alguien que planea su futuro contigo y de que no hay que rendirse.

There is no other person that means so much to them, and there is nobody they want more in life. That’s how you should direct your pensamientos propios.

Poor communication harms a relationship more than anything else. It’s also one of the leading causes of most breakups.

If you can’t stop obsessing about something regarding your current relationship, talk with your partner about it. Let them explain it to you or let them help you find a way to fix it.

Reprimir esos sentimientos es lo peor que puedes hacer. You may think that will make them go away, but the truth is it’ll only make them stuck in your mind.

They are going to be stuck in your mind and they will shut you down emotionally. You’ll become emocionalmente insensible...y su relación no podrá salvarse en ese momento.

6. Trabaja para aumentar tu autoestima

Sigues preguntándote si mereces toda esa felicidad, y a qué tienes que renunciar para equilibrar la felicidad y la miseria que los humanos obtienen en la vida.

Sientes que tu pareja sale contigo por lástima. You think they feel sorry for you, and that it’s the thing that keeps them in your life.

You idealize your partner and, in your eyes, they’re the most perfect person on this planet.

However, that also makes you overanalyze every step they make because you simply can’t accept the fact that someone as perfect as them chooses to love someone so ‘flawless’ as you.

You have such a bad self-image, and it’s high time to paint a whole new one. Necesita poner el autocuidado en primer lugar en tu lista de prioridades y céntrate en mejorar tu autoestima y confianza.

Sinceramente, el mejor consejo sobre relaciones que puedo darte cuando se trata de cómo dejar de pensar demasiado en una relación es que necesitas work on yourself; not your relationship. It’s obvious that the real problem is in you and your bad hábito de pensar demasiado.

7. Centrarse en el momento presente

Leave what could or what will happen aside. You don’t and shouldn’t live for the future.

No one can promise you that you’ll stay together forever. Sin embargo, ahora mismo, tienes a alguien que te acepta y te quiere a pesar de todos tus defectos.

You can’t undo things you’ve done in the past, nor can you control or stop some things from happening in the future. You only have power over your present.

Cuando aceptas vivir en la momento presente, you won’t have time for overthinking. You’ll be focused only on things that can make your relationship prosper in every possible way.

Vive el ahora. Disfruta de tu felicidad actual. Abraza la incertidumbre de la vida. Dejar de pensar demasiado y alejando a tu pareja.

Build a bridge of understanding and acceptance… a bridge that will connect you forever and that will leave no space for re-questioning yourself and your relationship.

8. Bloquear los pensamientos negativos

Lo que ocurre es que pensar demasiado a menudo responde a tus miedos y a tu ansiedad. Se siente abrumado por pensamientos y emociones negativos.

It’s just contagious. It starts from this little tiny thing and it ends up with you questioning your life. It’s often deeply connected to pessimism.

De alguna manera, eres incapaz de ver el lado bueno de tu futuro cuando analizas las cosas en exceso.

So, you see the end of your relationship and that’s what you’re preparing yourself for, even though the other side doesn’t really see things the way you do.

To him (or her), it might appear that everything is OK because you do not communicate your thoughts. You don’t even know what the final conclusion is because you just get tired eventually and you stop thinking totally.

Sigues callado, y pensar demasiado en silencio te está matando y está matando tu relación.

Necesitas salir de tu propia mente. Tienes que dejar de ser su prisionero.

Those unwanted thoughts need to be blocked. Stop thinking about those ‘what ifs’ and start enjoying the things you have right now.

9. Dejar atrás las heridas del pasado

You’ve been slapped by life one too many times, and God knows how many times your expectations were not met.

That’s why you have trouble picturing a happy ending. This is why it’s more logical for you to picture a miserable ending. But, it doesn’t have to be like this.

Hay una forma de cambiar las cosas y dejar de asfixiar tu relación dándole demasiadas vueltas. Hay una manera de evitar un final desagradable.

And, the only way you’ll do it is by dejar atrás un pasado doloroso. Su pasado relación y tu ex pareja probablemente te hayan dejado muchas cicatrices.

It’s actually normal that you want to protect yourself from being hurt again. Ahora, tu mecanismo de afrontamiento con esas cicatrices y el miedo a que te vuelvan a hacer daño es sobreanalizando cada detalle de su relación actual.

However, you can’t use it forever. You can’t continue to stop your partner from getting near to you. The more you obsess and overthink things, the more you’ll be pushing them away.

See, you have somebody who’s holding your hand no matter lo desastre que eres. Tienes a alguien que se esfuerza por ganarse tu confianza.

Don’t allow your past to ruin your present or, even worse, your future. Deshazte de tu carga emocional. You got a new chance to find love – to be sincerely loved. If you don’t embrace it, if you gamble it, you might end up regretting it for the rest of your life.

Para concluir

Worrying won’t stop bad things from happening… it only stops you from enjoying the good.

Así que, basta ya. You can’t dejar de pensar demasiado – todo el mundo lo sabe ya. No existe un remedio mágico ni puedes chasquear los dedos y hacer que desaparezca.

What you can do is stop going through all of it alone. You can stop ruining your relationship by telling him what’s bugging you. You can be each other’s rock, and that’ll do.

Tóxicos y pensamientos ansiosos provoked by overthinking in a relationship can really damage the bond between two partners to the point where it won’t be fixable any longer.

Don’t ever allow the awful hábito de pensar demasiado que se interponga entre usted y su pareja.

Stop overthinking and save your relationship before it’s too late. Let things flow in their natural way, and just keep on hoping for the best.

Meta: ¿Cuáles son los efectos de pensar demasiado en una relación? Descubra cómo perjudica a su vínculo y algunas formas eficaces de afrontarlo adecuadamente.