14 señales positivas durante la separación de su cónyuge

Here’s a news flash: separation can actually do a marriage some good. Instead of leading you to divorce, it could be just the thing your relationship needed all along.

Sometimes, couples use this time to rethink their entire marriage. Sometimes, their spouse’s absence makes them realize how important their presence is.

Pero, ¿cómo puede saber si usted y su pareja son una de estas parejas? ¿Cuáles son los indicios de que esto es sólo temporal y de que la reconciliación está cerca? ¿Cuáles son algunos signos positivos durante la separación de su cónyuge?

Well, I guess you’ll never find out unless you read on.

Signos positivos durante la separación

​If you experience all, or at least most, of these signs, your spouse likely wants you back! And let’s be real – you feel the same way.

1. El perdón es una opción.

One thing is for sure: bitterness won’t get you anywhere. If you and your ex still hold grudges for the things that happened in the past, reconciliation is definitely not an option.

Sin embargo, si piensa que podrías perdonarlos (and the feeling is mutual), it’s a clear sign that you’re headed in the right direction.

Don’t get me wrong – this is not me forcing you to forgive your significant other for everything that went on in the past. It’s perfectly fine if you can’t forgive them if they hurt you badly.

Nevertheless, if you both see forgiveness as an option or, even better, if you’ve already managed to forgive each other, it’s one of the most positive signs during separation.

But I have to warn you: if you forgive, it would be best to forget as well. There is no point in accepting your spouse’s apology and then going back to the thing you should have left behind every time you get the chance to.

2. La comunicación sigue viva.

En ignorando el periodo ha terminado. Ustedes dos están de vuelta para hablar entre sí.

Maybe you’re still not tackling deep topics like the ones concerning your marriage and potential reconciliation, but you’re getting there, though.

Lo importante es que la comunicación entre vosotros sigue viva. O, para ser exactos, ha vuelto de entre los muertos.

Maybe you and your ex-husband or wife exchange a text message every now and then, maybe you like each other’s social media posts, or perhaps you’ve finally started answering their phone calls. Either way, each of these baby steps matters.

You should be worried if you and your spouse don’t even say “hi” when you accidentally run into each other. This is one of the negative signs during separation, and it means that you’ve become enemies or, even worse, strangers.

It doesn’t matter if you’re engaging in random small talk, discussing the weather, or important topics – what matters is that you’re communicating in any way. Either way, one thing is for sure: you’re on the right track.

3. Comprender sus errores.

Here’s something that might burst your bubble: it takes two to tango. Yes, you understood me right. Both partners carry some responsibility for the way things went down in your marriage.

I’m not saying this is always true, especially if we’re talking about abuse or something similar. But in that case, I hope you’re not looking for positive signs during separation anyhow.

If you don’t understand that you’ve both made mistakes that brought you to your break-up, you still have a long way to go. You can’t claim that you no hizo nada malo!

Por otro lado, if you’ve reached a stage where you’re aware of your wrongdoings, that is a good sign you’re mature enough to at least talk about reconciliation. Of course, this must go both ways.

Not only that. You and your ex-husband or wife are ready to apologize for everything that happened in the past. You’ve realized that saving your marriage is more important than your pride.

Parece que este periodo de separación te ha ayudado a ver las cosas con más claridad.

4. La nostalgia te golpea fuerte.

When your spouse first moved out, you were kind of relieved that everything was finally over. However, now, when it’s time to think about your legal separation, you’ve changed your mind.

Parece que no todo fue tan horrible en un principio. Te preguntas, “Was my ex really that bad?”

Al fin y al cabo, te enamoraste de ellos por una razón. Y todas esas razones están volviendo a ti.

You can’t help but remember the good old days. All the memories and everything you two built together are overwhelming you. All of a sudden, it’s like you’ve forgotten why you two separated in the first place.

Todo lo que quieres hacer es pedirle a tu cónyuge para volver. Quieres continuar donde lo dejaste como si nada hubiera pasado.

Look, I’ll be honest with you. Nostalgia can be tricky. It can trick your mind into seeing things better than they actually were.

However, in your case, it’s one of the positive signs during separation, especially if your wife or husband wants to go back to the past as well.

5. La ira forma parte del pasado.

There is nothing worse than anger. It blinds you to the point where, as much as you try, you can’t see things clearly.

You forget how much you love this person standing next to you, and you’re abrumado por el odio y otras emociones negativas.

Esto es algo a lo que se enfrentan todas las parejas casadas.

Pero la ira va y viene. Tarde o temprano, se desvanece y comprendes que ambos exagerasteis.

Well, if you’ve finally calmed down, it’s a sign of progress. Now you can talk like two adults without decir cosas hirientes unos a otros, insultándose o lanzándose insultos innecesarios.

At the end of the day, you’re both sad about the way things went down. You’re no longer blinded by anger, and you don’t only culpar a la otra persona por todo este lío.

6. La capacidad de identificar los problemas centrales.

Here’s a piece of consejos sobre relacionesLa clave: nunca podrás solucionar tus problemas a menos que los identifiques desde el principio. Creo que esto debería ser de sentido común, pero lamentablemente muchas parejas casadas se saltan este paso inicial y se reconcilian como si nada hubiera pasado.

Por lo tanto, if you and your spouse are finally capable of talking things through like adults and, most importantly, figuring out what brought you here, it’s one of the most positive signs during separation.

I’m not talking about bouncing the ball of responsibility from one to the other. Getting to the heart of the problem means analyzing your relationship and tracing it back to the beginning of your issues.

It means being completely honest with yourself and each other and verbalizing everything that’s bothering you. It means curing the cause before trying to fix the symptoms and the consequences.

As easy as this might appear, it’s actually one of the most difficult steps. However, you can’t even think of getting your ex back without it!

7. La química está viva.

A veces, parece que tú y tu ex acabáis de empezar a salir. Todavía no hay una verdadera intimidad física, but whenever you two meet, you can cut the tension with a knife. And I’m talking about a good kind of tension here.

Yes, that’s right, it’s pretty clear that the la química está muy viva. Of course, it’s not something to build a marriage on, but you can’t succeed without it either.

When you meet, it’s like you’re seeing each other for the first time. All the body language and signos de atracción física están ahí.

First and foremost, you can’t keep your eyes off each other. Neither of you looks away, and it’s clear you both enjoy contacto visual prolongado.

Of course, let’s not forget the “accidental” physical contact, like touching each other’s hands or hugging more than necessary. The butterflies have made a huge comeback in your tummies!

Ustedes dos son ligar like newlyweds, and you both like it – as you should!

8. You’ve remained best friends.

¿Es posible seguir siendo amigo de un ex, especially if we’re talking about an ex-marital partner? Well, if you’ve managed to do it, it’s one of the positive signs during separation.

They’re still “your person” – the first one you call when you are in an emergency and the first person you share all of your good news with. Whether you like to admit it or not, it’s more than clear that you two have remained family even though your marriage is now shaky.

You’re worried about their well-being, and in return, they take care of you as well. Don’t get me wrong. You don’t do it because you have to – you both want to stay in each other’s lives one way or another.

You’re dealing with some issues; otherwise, you wouldn’t be here right now. However, if you’re best friends after everything that has happened, there is a good chance of getting back together.

9. There’s nobody else involved.

You two don’t talk much about your new love lives. However, you both know that there are no third parties involved. Your ex isn’t dating anyone new, and neither are you.

Your mutual friends assure you that you’re both single, there is no trace of que tengan una nueva relación on social media, and you’ve never seen them with anyone else.

It’s pretty obvious that neither of you is ready to get back into the dating pool. You’re both secretly hoping to volver juntos!

This is especially true for all of you husbands out there. If you’re asking yourself: “What are the signs my separated wife wants to reconcile?” ¡Eso es!

Trust me, if this woman was seeing someone else, she wouldn’t hide it. On the contrary, believe me when I tell you that the whole world would know about her new partner!

10. El divorcio no es la única opción.

Good news! You’ve reached a point where you see a way out. When you two first separated, you’d made up your mind. You were certain you’d proceed with legal separation as soon as possible because you thought your se acabó el matrimonio.

However, now, as time went by and as you’ve managed to cool down, you realize that divorcio is not the only possibility. I’m not saying that you’ve given up on the idea altogether, but you’re definitely thinking about all of your options.

De repente, recuperar a tu ex seems alright. You still haven’t given them a segunda oportunidad, but you’re definitely thinking about it.

You think about the way your marriage would look now and about all the changes you’d both have to make for things to work out.

And the best part is that you’re not the only one. It looks like they’ve stopped mentioning the word divorce too.

11. Ayuda profesional.

A lot of married couples don’t see a way out of the rut they’ve fallen into. As hard as they try, they can’t seem to find the light at the end of the tunnel.

But just because you don’t see it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Maybe you just need an outsider to show you the path to salvation.

No, I’m not talking about family members or mutual friends. Even though I’m sure all of these people wish you the best, don’t take relationship advice from someone who doesn’t know what they’re talking about.

En su lugar, necesita orientación profesional. Yes, that’s right, I’m talking about terapia matrimonial.

Bueno, la verdad sea dicha, probablemente deberías haber intentado terapia de pareja antes del periodo de separación, pero oye, más vale tarde que nunca.

A certified counselor will help you find middle ground. They will point out your mistakes and teach you how to save your marriage that’s falling apart.

Well, one of the positive signs during separation is that you are both willing to give it a try. It means you’re both willing to fix this sinking ship.

Don’t worry, this is not a sign of weakness. Instead, it’s a sign of maturity!

12. Nadie puede influir en ti.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not here to badmouth your family members, best friends, or coworkers. But let’s be honest, suegros narcisistas puede tener un gran impacto en su matrimonio.

Lo mismo ocurre con tus amigos. Aunque tengan buenas intenciones, a veces sus consejos pueden ser contraproducentes y causar más mal que bien.

Nadie debe interferir en tu matrimonio, y mucho menos tomar decisiones en tu nombre. Luckily, you and your partner have finally come to terms with this, and you wouldn’t think of elegir a tu familia unos sobre otros.

Maybe you’ve learned how to set healthy límites con tu suegra. Or you’ve stopped talking about every little thing in your relationship with your entire friend group.

Either way, you’ve reached a stage where nobody can influence you any longer. The only things that guide you are your opinions and feelings.

You don’t give a damn about what others might think. At the end of the day, they won’t be living with your spouse, so your relationship is none of their business.

13. La separación es una lección.

You know what the best part of going through a separation with your spouse is? I know what you must be thinking right now: “There is absolutely nothing good about it!”

Well, there really isn’t if you don’t use it the right way. And if you’re smart, you’ll use it to become a better man or woman.

Yes, you heard me right. I’m not talking about working on your husband or wife skills here. I’m talking about some serious self-improvement.

Si ha utilizado este periodo para hazte feliz, I assure you that you’ll manage to make your spouse happier in the future.

Don’t worry, if your partner is focusing on themself, it doesn’t mean that they’ve moved on. Maybe they’re just working on becoming a better person for themself and, later on, for you.

14. Todavía os queréis.

Finally, one of the most positive signs during separation is love. But first, let’s be clear about one thing: love alone is not enough for you to rebuild your marriage.

Usted y su cónyuge rompieron por una razón. Las cosas estaban lejos de ser perfectas, y usted weren’t happily married. Otherwise, you’d still be together.

Sin embargo, puedes tener todas las señales de arriba, pero si there’s no loveTodo es en vano. It’s crucial for your partner to seguir enamorado de ti and vice versa if you’re thinking about getting back together.

No, this doesn’t have to be a butterflies in the tummy kind of love. There doesn’t have to be fireworks involved.

After all, you’ve spent a long time together, and this love should have grown into something more peaceful. Nevertheless, it should also be much stronger than in the beginning.

¿Cómo saber si tu mujer te sigue queriendo después de la separación?

Si su esposa te respeta, takes care of your well-being, doesn’t date anyone new, still hangs out with your family members and mutual friends, and no longer talks about divorce, ella todavía te ama.

Don’t wait for her to admit her feelings or tell you te echa de menos – these clues are more than enough for you to try and get her back!

If you’re wondering, “What are the señales de que mi mujer separada quiere reconciliarse?” you’ve just read them! She may still be angry about some things you did, but trust me, the love she has for you is still there!

Véase también: 8 ejemplos de la duración media de la separación antes de la reconciliación

¿Cuáles son las etapas de la separación?

Las etapas de la separación son:

1. Negación y conmoción

2. Ira

3. Autoinculpación

4. Miedo

5. Duelo

6. Re-invención

7. Abrace

Cada etapa tiene su propósito y es una gran parte del proceso de curación. It doesn’t matter if you volver con tu ex or proceed towards legal separation – you have to go through each one of them!

¿Qué no debe hacer durante la separación?

Una de las peores cosas que se pueden hacer durante una separación es lanzarse a un relación de rebote. Besides that, you should never badmouth your spouse, and you shouldn’t allow others to influence you.

Relaciones de rebote

First and foremost, getting into a new relationship too soon won’t do either party any good. I know you’re probably doing it to hurt your spouse and to make them jealous, but that’s not a healthy manera de separar.

Trust me, you’ll only end up hurting yourself in the process. And let’s not forget that you’re likely to break an innocent person’s heart who didn’t sign up to be dragged into your mess.

Hablar mal de los demás

Hablar mal de tu pareja y revelar al mundo detalles privados de vuestra relación es lo más bajo que puedes caer. Cuando hablas mal de ellos, también hablas mal de ti mismo.

Don’t forget that you’ve spent so much time with this person. If they were so bad, what were you doing with them all along?

Impacto extranjero

The same goes for allowing others to impact you. You’re an adult, and you and your marital partner are the only ones allowed to make decisions regarding your marriage.

Acudir a un consejero matrimonial es una cosa, pero aceptar consejos no deseados de tus vecinos, compañeros de trabajo y de todo el mundo es inmaduro e incorrecto.

Para terminar:

Now that you’ve checked out all of these positive signs during separation, it’s time to move forward with reconciliation. You and your spouse are headed in the right direction, but this doesn’t mean that your job is done.

I’m sure you still have a long way to go. But the good news is that you have something to hold on to – it’s obvious that you both want to get back together.

Así que, ¡unan fuerzas y trabajen para salvar su matrimonio! Pulgares arriba.