O Amor é Complicado: 20 razões para o fazer e o que fazer em relação a isso

How many times have you thought to yourself: ”Man, love is complicated. Why don’t I just give up?”

Too many times, I’m sure.

Pode ser cansativo querer algo real quando só nos aparecem problemas.

Mas, o que é que faz aparecer estes problemas? O amor é realmente complicado? Se sim, porquê?

If you want to know the answers, read on and you’ll have them, along with some beautiful citações de amor que descrevem perfeitamente a complexidade desta emoção.

O amor é uma emoção complicada?

Nem por isso, mas somos nós que complicamos as coisas.

Real, amor incondicional é uma coisa bonita, e muito simples.

It encourages you to become the best version of yourself all the while showing you that you have been worthy all along. It makes you realize why all the previous relationships didn’t work out.

So, unless your person makes you feel that way, they are not the one. But, if you believe them to be, despite that, that’s where issues arise.

20 razões pelas quais o amor é complicado e o que fazer

Relações românticas can be a very complicated thing. I know you just want to make sense of it all, so if you’re having a hard time accomplishing that, take a look at the following possible reasons why love is complicated for you:

1. Muros demasiado altos.

O amor é complicado porque tens medo de o deixar entrar. Está em constante sofrimento por não ser capaz de encontrar alguém que te faça felizmas assim que o fazes, afasta-los.

You find excuses to convince yourself that they’re not really your type, but in reality, you just don’t know how to accept someone’s love.

F. Scott Fitzgerald disse uma vez: ”I’m not used to being loved. I wouldn’t know what to do.”

And, that’s understandable. If you’ve never had a vida amorosa feliz, you will be scared because it’s a completely unknown universe.

Still, remind yourself of how you deserve the kind of love that is real, and even if you don’t know how to act, in fact, all you need to do is let it happen.

2. Demasiado ou pouco.

É uma triste verdade que, na maioria das vezes, um dos parceiros ama mais do que o outro. Se estiver aquele que dá mais amor do que recebeÉ natural que se sinta exausto com isso.

Isto pode até criar problemas de baixa autoestima. Pode pensar-se que se é indigno de amor só porque your person doesn’t love you.

On the other hand, if you are the partner who loves less, you might feel guilty. You stay in the relationship because you’re medo de ser solteiro ou porque estamos habituados a isso.

Em qualquer dos casos, não é justo para nenhum de vós continuar a estar um com o outro. Talvez devessem pensar numa separação; caso contrário, só se sentirão mais infelizes com o passar dos dias.

3. Haunted by the past…

Acredita que ninguém é capaz de ser leal? Acredita que está destinado a ser traído se o deixar aproximar-se?

Bem, nesse caso, não é de admirar que sinta que o amor é complicado.

I don’t blame you for ter problemas de confiança. That’s the fault of those who betrayed you the first time you experienced love, but you need to realize that you are still responsible for your own recovery.

You don’t need to forgive them, but you do need to let go. Not every person is the same.

Tell me… would you ever betray your loved one? Well, there’s your answer.

There are a lot of people out there like you, but you don’t find them because you aren’t really looking. It’s time to change that.

4. Love isn’t enough.

Amar alguém é fácil, mas gostar dessa pessoa é a parte mais difícil.

Talvez pudesses conquistar o mundo com a quantidade de amor que tens por eles, mas continuas a tremer cada vez que eles são rudes para alguém.

Or, perhaps you’re looking for a mature partner, and can’t help but feel bad every time they avoid their responsibilities.

Either way, that may be a sign that you’re not right for each other.

Naturally, you can work on all your problems. Nothing is unsolvable. But, remember that it’s possible to have an epic romance where you both love and like someone.

Permite-te encontrar algo que te satisfaça. O meio amor nunca fez bem a ninguém.

5. Things change…

Different personalities are attracted to each other… or are they?

Well, yes, when you notice someone who’s your total opposite, your dopamine levels will be through the roof.

Todos nós queremos algo excitante. Raramente alguém quer outra versão de si próprio.

No entanto, aquilo que nos entusiasma no início é muitas vezes aquilo que nos enlouquece ao fim de algum tempo.

That’s why you should remember that differences indeed are okay, and necessary, at that. However, there should still be certain similarities that will help the relationship to stay alive.

Figure out what’s truly important to you, and make decisions accordingly.

6. A idealização traz problemas.

Alguma vez conheceste alguém de quem gostasses muito, mas exageraste as suas boas qualidades ao ponto de as começares a glorificar?

Apaixona-se pela versão que criou deles, mas a sua mente recusa-se a aceitar quem eles são na realidade.

So, if you think that love is complicated, it’s because you make it so.

People aren’t projects for you to work on, so stop amando-os condicionalmente. See the person before you as they are, so that when you fall in love, you’ll know it’s real.

7. Sem amizade.

The biggest mistake people make is entering into relationships where there is no friendship. That might excite you in the beginning, but eventually, you’ll get tired.

O seu parceiro deve ser também o seu melhor amigo, a pessoa com quem partilha tudo.

If you can’t communicate nor have fun, but see each other merely as PARTNERS, then I am afraid that might easily turn into a heartbreak.

Para quê querer uma relação tão complicada quando se pode olhar para alguém e ver verdadeiramente tudo o que sempre se quis?

8. O romance é uma coisa do passado.

Não, o fase de lua de mel won’t last forever, but that doesn’t mean you should entirely give up on romance. If all that remains in the relationship is friendship, that’s just not enough.

So, never stop going on dates or organizing small, exciting trips together. Never stop flirting with each other because what’s a relationship without that?

Mantém a chama entre vocês viva a todo o custo. It’s never a bad time for some romance.

9. Souls that aren’t connected.

It’s not enough to proclaim that the other person is your partner. A relationship is much more than that.

It’s accepting each other’s worst parts and offering comfort and love whenever you need it. It’s being there no matter how difficult it gets.

If your partner is prone to repressing their emotions and dealing with problems alone, that’s a major issue. But, not one that can’t be solved.

Comece por ser a pessoa que se abre com eles. Mostre-lhes que vulnerabilidade emocional isn’t a weakness, but a way to heal your sad soul and strengthen your relationship in the process.

10. Valores fundamentais opostos.

Você e o seu parceiro têm valores completamente diferentes?

Perhaps you’re extremely ethical whereas they are prone to cheating. Or, perhaps, you have a tendency to fight for the weak whereas they are the one who belittles the weak.

Se assim for, a sua história de amor pode não ter um final tão feliz. Mas não se preocupe!

If you are willing to put in hard work, you can strengthen your relationship. But, both of you have to be prepared for what’s coming.

On the other hand, if nothing changes, there’s no point in pushing it.

There is an ideal partner out there with the same core values as you. Once you let go of what isn’t for you, you will find them.

11. Problems don’t mean the end.

So many (potential) couples observe a problem as proof that they shouldn’t be together. This couldn’t be more of a wrong approach.

In reality, you are a team that should overcome every obstacle with healthy communication. It is you two against the problem. You aren’t competing with each other.

Por isso, da próxima vez que surgir um problema, pense nisso. Sente-se com o seu parceiro e alivie o seu coração pesado.

Depois, procurem soluções. O que é que se pode fazer para fazer a outra pessoa feliz?

Nunca esquecer o verdadeiro valor do amor.

12. Infatuation isn’t love.

It is not uncommon for people to fall for each other’s looks or to fall victim to idealization all the while never truly getting to know each other.

But, this isn’t really love. This is paixão.

You can’t expect something to work if you don’t know who the person in front of you is. You can’t expect a relationship to be ideal only because you are attracted to them.

Se nos apaixonarmos pelas razões erradas, é provável que fiquemos desiludidos!

I’m sorry, but you need to reevaluate your checklist, and start looking for someone you truly like despite all their flaws.

13. Obsessões pouco saudáveis.

Too much of anything is not good. As hard as it might be for you to believe that, it’s the truth.

Não importa o quanto amamos alguém ou alguma coisa, se dedicarmos uma quantidade de tempo não saudável a essa pessoa ou a essa coisa, isso acabará por ter um efeito negativo.

Are you too clingy? Do you get angry if your partner doesn’t respond to your message immediately? Do you expect to see them every day even when you know they’re busy?

Se for esse o caso, é preciso repensar os vossos métodos.

Your partner has their own life, and you have yours. You can’t expect them to live for you and be there 24/7.

Depois de aprender como estabelecer limites, you will learn to respect each other more, and perhaps love won’t be so complicated after all.

14. Desejar outra pessoa.

Uma das razões mais comuns pelas quais o amor romântico é complicado é o envolvimento de uma terceira pessoa.

Are you still in love with your high school ex? Do you secretly have feelings for someone, even though you keep saying they’re ‘apenas um amigo‘?

Se assim for, isso pode afetar muito a sua relação. Se você ou o seu parceiro interessado noutra pessoa, it’s not fair to continue being together.

You will be unhappy because in your mind, you will always be elsewhere, and your partner will never fully understand why you can’t love them the way they love you.

15. Anos a separar-vos.

Are you in love with someone who is ten years older than you? Or, perhaps, someone who is a lot younger, and you feel more like a parental figure than a partner? Are they your ‘a pessoa certa na altura errada‘?

Bem, o relação de diferença de idades is the one that’s causing you such difficulties.

But, the real problem isn’t the age gap; it’s society that convinces us that an age gap is something to be worried about when in reality, it isn’t.

Naturally, you will not date a minor and justify it by saying that it’s amor verdadeiro. But, in other cases, if you really love each other, you shouldn’t let your age be the problem.

Se tiver diferentes níveis de maturidade, yes, that can be frustrating, but love really conquers all. You should help each other grow, and not be angry over what you don’t understand.

16. O seu destino está nas mãos dos outros.

We all want our family to approve of our partner. It’s understandable to want everyone to get along. But, some of us take it to a whole new level.

What you need to understand is this – it is YOU who is dating your partner, NOT your family. It is YOUR future that’s on the line, NOT theirs.

If you really love them, you shouldn’t let anyone else’s opinion intervene with how you feel.

Lutem por isso, porque o mais importante são os vossos sentimentos.

17. O medo a vencer os teus desejos.

Perhaps you adore this person, but there’s something inside you that keeps finding reasons to end it. Well, that might be because of your questões de empenhamento.

People who are afraid to commit convince themselves that they don’t really need anybody, or they constantly question the other person’s love.

O que tem de fazer é ir ao fundo da questão. Descubra a raiz do problema e lute contra ele com todas as suas forças.

Será que alguma vez encontrar o amor? Well, that’s up to you.

18. Amor não correspondido.

We’ve all been there – loving someone who doesn’t love us back. Como somos tolos por desejarmos que as coisas fossem diferentes! Porque é que nos deixamos sentir assim?

Well, you don’t really choose who you love, but at the same time, you do.

Have you heard that quote ”We accept the love we think we deserve”? That’s not far from the truth.

If you keep holding on to someone who’s not ready to reciprocate your feelings, you need to aprender a gostar de si próprio mais.

Just know that it’s okay to be struggling with this. You are not the only one. But, at least try to remind yourself daily that you deserve a new love story.

Prática autocuidado emocional diariamente e acabará por lá chegar. Passos de bebé!

19. Secret loves…

Ah, a dor de estar apaixonado por alguém em segredo e não poder dizer-lhe! A dor de a ver todos os dias e de se esforçar por esconder o que se sente.

This is painful no matter which scenario you put it in. Perhaps you’re apaixonado pelo seu melhor amigo or a person you’ve just met, but who keeps giving you sinais contraditórios.

Meu Deus, o que é que se faz?!

Well, you can start by telling them how you feel. This doesn’t have to be done in a direct way.

Pode explicar-lhes a profundidade dos seus sentimentos, mantendo contacto visual prolongado ou tocando-lhes suavemente com um sorriso malicioso na cara.

Or, it’s best that you figure out what their linguagem do amor é, e mostrar o seu afeto em conformidade.

20. Alerta de narcisista!

Não há falta de pessoas com tendências narcísicas. Se encontraste alguém que continua a ignorar os teus sentimentos, ao mesmo tempo que te faz sentir responsável pela sua felicidade, terás dificuldade em acreditar no amor.

I hope you understand that love isn’t supposed to hurt. You’re not supposed to lie down every night wondering what you did wrong.

If your partner makes you feel sad rather than happy, then maybe it’s time to seguir em frente. There is someone out there who will treat you better, and don’t you forget that!

“Love Is Complicated” Quotes

1. “They say if the love is true, then it’s easy. But, that’s false. Love is complicated. It’s sticky. It’s bliss and it’s a mix of emotions. It’s not easy.” – Dominic Riccitello

2. “Love.” “She looked at me with those blue eyes. Isn’t it astonishing how confused and complicated such a small, simple word is?
It attracts so many other things, doesn’t it, that stick to it like barnacles on rock… fear, guilt, need. You can’t even see the rock anymore. I imagine love in its purest form is a rare thing.” – Deb Caletti

3. ”From the complications of loving you, I think there is no end or return. No answer, no coming out of it, which is the only way to love, isn’t it?” – Mary Oliver

4. ”It’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me… everyday.” – Nicholas Sparks

5. “Love enters us like a vague ailment. Your head spins. Your underarms tingle. Love hurts and love has consequences: marriage, babies, separation, longing, human complications.” – Chloe Thurlow

6. “”Complicated – shmomplicated,” she said, waving her hand. ”If you love her, you make it work.” – Fiona Cole

7. “”But, love? Is that what you feel for Morpheus?” I swallow hard. “I’m not sure… But, there’s something real between us… something powerful.” I sink further into my seat. “It’s complicated.”” – A.G. Howard

8. “Love should be easy. Life is hard. Relationships are complicated. But, the love, that’s the one thing we should be able to count on.” – Jacqueline Simon Gunn

9. “And, maybe that is what it comes down to, knowing what the other person needs even before they know it themselves. Maybe it’s just that simple, and it is only us who make it complicated with our anniversaries and our gifts, with grand declarations and public demonstrations, empty words and valuable stones.” – Shitij Sharma

10. “Even so, in the midst of this complicated love, there is a holy union.” – Lorna Jane Cook

Considerações finais

As you can see, love is complicated… but not in the way you might have thought. It’s really up to you to fight your inner demons that stop you from accepting it.

O seu destino está nas suas próprias mãos. Certifique-se de que cada decisão que tomar o conduzirá a um uma vida mais fácil e feliz.