El amor es complicado: 20 razones y qué hacer al respecto

How many times have you thought to yourself: ”Man, love is complicated. Why don’t I just give up?”

Too many times, I’m sure.

Puede ser agotador querer algo real cuando sólo te llegan problemas.

Pero, ¿qué hace que aparezcan estos problemas? ¿Es realmente complicado el amor? Si es así, ¿por qué?

If you want to know the answers, read on and you’ll have them, along with some beautiful frases de amor que describen a la perfección la complejidad de esta emoción.

¿Es el amor una emoción complicada?

En realidad no, pero somos nosotros los que lo complicamos.

Real, amor incondicional es algo hermoso, y muy sencillo.

It encourages you to become the best version of yourself all the while showing you that you have been worthy all along. It makes you realize why all the previous relationships didn’t work out.

So, unless your person makes you feel that way, they are not the one. But, if you believe them to be, despite that, that’s where issues arise.

20 razones por las que el amor es complicado y qué hacer

Relaciones románticas can be a very complicated thing. I know you just want to make sense of it all, so if you’re having a hard time accomplishing that, take a look at the following possible reasons why love is complicated for you:

1. Muros construidos demasiado altos.

El amor es complicado porque tienes miedo de dejarlo entrar. Estás en constante dolor por no ser capaz de encuentra a alguien que te haga felizpero en cuanto lo haces, los alejas.

You find excuses to convince yourself that they’re not really your type, but in reality, you just don’t know how to accept someone’s love.

F. Scott Fitzgerald dijo una vez: ”I’m not used to being loved. I wouldn’t know what to do.”

And, that’s understandable. If you’ve never had a vida amorosa feliz, you will be scared because it’s a completely unknown universe.

Still, remind yourself of how you deserve the kind of love that is real, and even if you don’t know how to act, in fact, all you need to do is let it happen.

2. Demasiado o demasiado poco.

Es una triste verdad que, en la mayoría de los casos, un miembro de la pareja ama más que el otro. Si usted es el que da más amor del que recibeses natural que te sientas agotado por ello.

Esto puede incluso crear problemas de baja autoestima. Puedes pensar que eres indigno de amor sólo porque your person doesn’t love you.

On the other hand, if you are the partner who loves less, you might feel guilty. You stay in the relationship because you’re miedo a la soltería o porque simplemente estás acostumbrado.

En cualquier caso, no es justo para ninguno de los dos seguir estando el uno con el otro. Quizá deberíais plantearos una ruptura; de lo contrario, sólo os sentiréis más desgraciados con el paso de los días.

3. Haunted by the past…

¿Crees que nadie es capaz de ser leal? ¿Crees que te traicionarán si dejas que se acerquen?

En ese caso, no es de extrañar que sientas que el amor es complicado.

I don’t blame you for tener problemas de confianza. That’s the fault of those who betrayed you the first time you experienced love, but you need to realize that you are still responsible for your own recovery.

You don’t need to forgive them, but you do need to let go. Not every person is the same.

Tell me… would you ever betray your loved one? Well, there’s your answer.

There are a lot of people out there like you, but you don’t find them because you aren’t really looking. It’s time to change that.

4. Love isn’t enough.

Querer a alguien es fácil, pero gustarle es lo difícil.

Tal vez podrías conquistar el mundo con la cantidad de amor que sientes por ellos, pero sigues estremeciéndote cada vez que son groseros con alguien.

Or, perhaps you’re looking for a mature partner, and can’t help but feel bad every time they avoid their responsibilities.

Either way, that may be a sign that you’re not right for each other.

Naturally, you can work on all your problems. Nothing is unsolvable. But, remember that it’s possible to have an epic romance where you both love and like someone.

Permítete encontrar algo que te llene. El amor a medias nunca le ha hecho bien a nadie.

5. Things change…

Different personalities are attracted to each other… or are they?

Well, yes, when you notice someone who’s your total opposite, your dopamine levels will be through the roof.

Todos queremos algo emocionante. Rara vez alguien quiere otra versión de sí mismo.

Sin embargo, lo que te entusiasma al principio es muy a menudo lo que te vuelve loco al cabo de un tiempo.

That’s why you should remember that differences indeed are okay, and necessary, at that. However, there should still be certain similarities that will help the relationship to stay alive.

Figure out what’s truly important to you, and make decisions accordingly.

6. La idealización trae problemas.

¿Alguna vez has conocido a alguien que te gustara de verdad, pero has exagerado sus buenas cualidades hasta el punto de empezar a glorificarlo?

Te enamoras de la versión de ellos que has creado, pero tu mente se niega a aceptar quiénes son en realidad.

So, if you think that love is complicated, it’s because you make it so.

People aren’t projects for you to work on, so stop amándolos condicionalmente. See the person before you as they are, so that when you fall in love, you’ll know it’s real.

7. No hay amistad.

The biggest mistake people make is entering into relationships where there is no friendship. That might excite you in the beginning, but eventually, you’ll get tired.

Tu pareja también debe ser tu mejor amigo; la persona con la que compartes todo.

If you can’t communicate nor have fun, but see each other merely as PARTNERS, then I am afraid that might easily turn into a heartbreak.

¿Por qué querrías una relación tan complicada cuando podrías mirar a alguien y ver genuinamente todo lo que siempre has querido?

8. El romance es cosa del pasado.

No, el fase de luna de miel won’t last forever, but that doesn’t mean you should entirely give up on romance. If all that remains in the relationship is friendship, that’s just not enough.

So, never stop going on dates or organizing small, exciting trips together. Never stop flirting with each other because what’s a relationship without that?

Mantén viva la llama entre vosotros a toda costa. It’s never a bad time for some romance.

9. Souls that aren’t connected.

It’s not enough to proclaim that the other person is your partner. A relationship is much more than that.

It’s accepting each other’s worst parts and offering comfort and love whenever you need it. It’s being there no matter how difficult it gets.

If your partner is prone to repressing their emotions and dealing with problems alone, that’s a major issue. But, not one that can’t be solved.

Empieza por ser tú quien se abra a ellos. Muéstreles que vulnerabilidad emocional isn’t a weakness, but a way to heal your sad soul and strengthen your relationship in the process.

10. Valores fundamentales opuestos.

¿Usted y su pareja tienen valores totalmente diferentes?

Perhaps you’re extremely ethical whereas they are prone to cheating. Or, perhaps, you have a tendency to fight for the weak whereas they are the one who belittles the weak.

Si es así, puede que su historia de amor no tenga un final tan feliz. Pero, ¡no te preocupes!

If you are willing to put in hard work, you can strengthen your relationship. But, both of you have to be prepared for what’s coming.

On the other hand, if nothing changes, there’s no point in pushing it.

There is an ideal partner out there with the same core values as you. Once you let go of what isn’t for you, you will find them.

11. Problems don’t mean the end.

So many (potential) couples observe a problem as proof that they shouldn’t be together. This couldn’t be more of a wrong approach.

In reality, you are a team that should overcome every obstacle with healthy communication. It is you two against the problem. You aren’t competing with each other.

Así que, la próxima vez que surja un problema, piensa en ello. Siéntate con tu pareja y aligera tu pesado corazón.

A continuación, busque soluciones. ¿Qué puedes hacer para que la otra persona sea feliz?

No olvidar nunca el verdadero valor del amor.

12. Infatuation isn’t love.

It is not uncommon for people to fall for each other’s looks or to fall victim to idealization all the while never truly getting to know each other.

But, this isn’t really love. This is encaprichamiento.

You can’t expect something to work if you don’t know who the person in front of you is. You can’t expect a relationship to be ideal only because you are attracted to them.

Si te enamoras por las razones equivocadas, seguro que te decepcionas.

I’m sorry, but you need to reevaluate your checklist, and start looking for someone you truly like despite all their flaws.

13. Obsesiones malsanas.

Too much of anything is not good. As hard as it might be for you to believe that, it’s the truth.

Por mucho que ames a alguien o algo, si le dedicas una cantidad de tiempo insana, acabará teniendo un efecto negativo.

Are you too clingy? Do you get angry if your partner doesn’t respond to your message immediately? Do you expect to see them every day even when you know they’re busy?

Si es así, tienes que replantearte tus costumbres.

Your partner has their own life, and you have yours. You can’t expect them to live for you and be there 24/7.

Una vez que aprendas cómo establecer límites, you will learn to respect each other more, and perhaps love won’t be so complicated after all.

14. Desear a otra persona.

Una de las razones más comunes por las que el amor romántico se complica es la implicación de un tercero.

Are you still in love with your high school ex? Do you secretly have feelings for someone, even though you keep saying they’re ‘sólo un amigo‘?

Si es así, eso puede afectar mucho a su relación. Si usted o su pareja interesado en otra persona, it’s not fair to continue being together.

You will be unhappy because in your mind, you will always be elsewhere, and your partner will never fully understand why you can’t love them the way they love you.

15. Años interponiéndose entre vosotros.

Are you in love with someone who is ten years older than you? Or, perhaps, someone who is a lot younger, and you feel more like a parental figure than a partner? Are they your ‘persona adecuada en el momento inadecuado‘?

Bueno, el diferencia de edad en la relación is the one that’s causing you such difficulties.

But, the real problem isn’t the age gap; it’s society that convinces us that an age gap is something to be worried about when in reality, it isn’t.

Naturally, you will not date a minor and justify it by saying that it’s amor verdadero. But, in other cases, if you really love each other, you shouldn’t let your age be the problem.

Si tiene diferentes niveles de madurez, yes, that can be frustrating, but love really conquers all. You should help each other grow, and not be angry over what you don’t understand.

16. Su destino está en manos de otros.

We all want our family to approve of our partner. It’s understandable to want everyone to get along. But, some of us take it to a whole new level.

What you need to understand is this – it is YOU who is dating your partner, NOT your family. It is YOUR future that’s on the line, NOT theirs.

If you really love them, you shouldn’t let anyone else’s opinion intervene with how you feel.

Lucha por ello porque lo más importante son tus sentimientos.

17. El miedo se impone a tus deseos.

Perhaps you adore this person, but there’s something inside you that keeps finding reasons to end it. Well, that might be because of your cuestiones de compromiso.

People who are afraid to commit convince themselves that they don’t really need anybody, or they constantly question the other person’s love.

Lo que tienes que hacer es llegar al fondo del asunto. Averigua la raíz del problema y combátelo con todas tus fuerzas.

¿Alguna vez encontrar el amor? Well, that’s up to you.

18. Amor no correspondido.

We’ve all been there – loving someone who doesn’t love us back. ¡Qué tontos somos por desear que las cosas sean diferentes! ¿Por qué nos dejamos sentir así?

Well, you don’t really choose who you love, but at the same time, you do.

Have you heard that quote ”We accept the love we think we deserve”? That’s not far from the truth.

If you keep holding on to someone who’s not ready to reciprocate your feelings, you need to aprende a quererte a ti mismo más.

Just know that it’s okay to be struggling with this. You are not the only one. But, at least try to remind yourself daily that you deserve a new love story.

Práctica autocuidado emocional diariamente y al final lo conseguirás. ¡Pasos de bebé!

19. Secret loves…

Ah, el dolor de estar enamorado de alguien en secreto y no poder decírselo. El dolor de verlos todos los días y esforzarte por ocultar lo que sientes.

This is painful no matter which scenario you put it in. Perhaps you’re enamorado de tu mejor amigo or a person you’ve just met, but who keeps giving you señales contradictorias.

Santo cielo, ¿qué se puede hacer?

Well, you can start by telling them how you feel. This doesn’t have to be done in a direct way.

Puedes explicarles la profundidad de tus sentimientos manteniendo contacto visual prolongado o tocándolas suavemente con una sonrisa ladina en la cara.

Or, it’s best that you figure out what their lenguaje del amor y demuestre su afecto en consecuencia.

20. ¡Alerta narcisista!

No faltan personas con tendencias narcisistas. Si has tropezado con alguien que sigue despreciando tus sentimientos mientras te hace sentir responsable de su felicidad, te costará creer en el amor.

I hope you understand that love isn’t supposed to hurt. You’re not supposed to lie down every night wondering what you did wrong.

If your partner makes you feel sad rather than happy, then maybe it’s time to seguir adelante. There is someone out there who will treat you better, and don’t you forget that!

“Love Is Complicated” Quotes

1. “They say if the love is true, then it’s easy. But, that’s false. Love is complicated. It’s sticky. It’s bliss and it’s a mix of emotions. It’s not easy.” – Dominic Riccitello

2. “Love.” “She looked at me with those blue eyes. Isn’t it astonishing how confused and complicated such a small, simple word is?
It attracts so many other things, doesn’t it, that stick to it like barnacles on rock… fear, guilt, need. You can’t even see the rock anymore. I imagine love in its purest form is a rare thing.” – Deb Caletti

3. ”From the complications of loving you, I think there is no end or return. No answer, no coming out of it, which is the only way to love, isn’t it?” – Mary Oliver

4. ”It’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me… everyday.” – Nicholas Sparks

5. “Love enters us like a vague ailment. Your head spins. Your underarms tingle. Love hurts and love has consequences: marriage, babies, separation, longing, human complications.” – Chloe Thurlow

6. “”Complicated – shmomplicated,” she said, waving her hand. ”If you love her, you make it work.” – Fiona Cole

7. “”But, love? Is that what you feel for Morpheus?” I swallow hard. “I’m not sure… But, there’s something real between us… something powerful.” I sink further into my seat. “It’s complicated.”” – A.G. Howard

8. “Love should be easy. Life is hard. Relationships are complicated. But, the love, that’s the one thing we should be able to count on.” – Jacqueline Simon Gunn

9. “And, maybe that is what it comes down to, knowing what the other person needs even before they know it themselves. Maybe it’s just that simple, and it is only us who make it complicated with our anniversaries and our gifts, with grand declarations and public demonstrations, empty words and valuable stones.” – Shitij Sharma

10. “Even so, in the midst of this complicated love, there is a holy union.” – Lorna Jane Cook

Reflexiones finales

As you can see, love is complicated… but not in the way you might have thought. It’s really up to you to fight your inner demons that stop you from accepting it.

Tu destino está en tus manos. Asegúrate de que cada decisión que tomes te llevará a un una vida más fácil y feliz.