All of you single souls out there who think that you’re going to be single forever, I wish you a warm welcome and I’m sending you a big (although virtual) hug and the promise that after reading this article, nothing will ever be the same for you!
Now, let’s dive into some interesting facts about the life of a single woman/man, with which we will start our transformational journey!
So, if you’ve been single for a while, you’re probably very well familiar with all the benefits of such a lifestyle.
You can go on a journey wherever you want and whenever you want, you don’t have to worry about ‘Seen’ messages or unanswered calls, you don’t have to be perfectly hairless (shaved) all the time, you don’t have to worry if someone will see the bags under your eyes when you wake up in the morning and you don’t have to worry about them cheating on you.
You are a free, independent human being and you choose what you’re going to do, when and how!
But even though all of the benefits above are pretty much appealing, there are times when you crave more.
There are times when you really want to have someone special in your life with whom you’ll share all of your secrets, who will hug you tight and hold you in their arms forever, who will forget to call you back after you call them and who will get on your nerves so much that you would want to kill them but you can’t because you love them too much.
And that is when you get really motivated to start dating again.You refresh your wardrobe, buy the newest mascara, and update your profile on dating apps, you decide to go out more and in the process, you meet some potential candidates and give them a chance to introduce themselves.
But somehow, every date ends up in disaster. Half of the time you fight to find a common language, you can’t relax and even the people around you notice a lack of connection between the two of you.
You become tired of it and you see no point in dating any further. And that is when you say to yourself: ‘I will never fall in love no matter what I do and I will never experience true love. I’m going to be single forever!’
No matter what the rest of us think about it, the truth is that you have every right to feel this way.
It’s really frustrating to constantly make efforts for the wrong people or for those who you’re simply not compatible with.
Now, I know that it sounds unreal but, believe me, not all hope is lost! First of all, know that there is nothing wrong with being solo and you’re definitely not going to be like this forever.
Someday in the near future, you will find your true love (I can promise you that)! Until then, here are some helpful things to remind you of whenever you feel like you’ll be single forever!
It’s Perfectly Okay To Feel Lonely
The first thing you need to understand is that it is perfectly okay to feel lonely.
Even those people in relationships feel lonely ( though for different reasons).
The point is, no matter the circumstances, there will always be times when you’ll feel lonely because it’s a part of our human nature.
And whenever you find yourself feeling lonely or craving a romantic relationship, know that it is perfectly fine to feel this way.
It may sound absurd but it’s better to feel lonely because you are single than to feel lonely in a relationship.
Always look on the bright side and you’ll see how everything makes perfect sense (though I know that sometimes we’re just unable to see it that way).
So, whenever you feel lonely, take a deep breath and tell yourself that it is okay to feel this way and that it will pass.
I don’t think there’s any need to tell you that your potential partner will not just appear at your door, so always keep this in mind!
Remember that if you want to make something happen, you need to take certain action.
If you want to meet someone new, you have to be ready to go out more, you have to always go to some new places, maybe hit the gym sometimes, find some new hobbies, consider indulging in dating apps and similar.
Whatever action you choose to take, it will certainly benefit you!
The worst thing you could do is just keep being a couch potato and keep saying that nothing will ever change.
Remember that everything is in your mind. Change will happen when you become ready to work for it!
Forget About Perfection
Never confuse true love with perfection. Never look for the perfect person because maybe that guy or girl you rejected in the past without even giving them a chance was your potential soulmate.
Just relax and keep in mind that your future soulmate will be someone who is far from perfection, like the rest of us.
But when you fall in love with them, they will become perfect for you.
All of their flaws and quirks will be invisible to your eye or you simply won’t mind them because that’s what makes them who they are.
Always be open to give a chance to everyone, even if they don’t fit your definition of a real man at that moment because that’s the only way to meet the one.
You don’t meet the perfect person, they become one when you get to know them better.
Work On Your Inner Self
I know that falling in love sounds so simple and indeed it is but there are also some things that require you to work on them.
When it comes to the dating world, it is of the utmost importance to work on your inner self.
Ask yourself what types of people you are attracted to and why that is so, ask yourself if you are treating every potential date equally and whether you have difficulties trusting others or you’re afraid of intimacy.
Just be honest with yourself, accept things as they are and start working on them.
But don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that being single must mean that there is something wrong with you.
On the contrary, most of you are single by choice but these are some essential questions that will boost your ‘performance’ when it comes to the dating world.
Let Go Of The Past
If you already were in a relationship and things didn’t go really great, chances are that your past might be preventing you from enjoying the present.
If your relationship was a true disaster, it is completely normal to have an aversion toward entering a new one.
Your mind might be telling you that it’s time to move on but your heart is simply afraid to meet new people and I understand that completely but letting go of the past is one of the number one things you need to do if you want to refresh your love life and start from scratch.
If your previous relationships hurt you, don’t think that this will happen again because the chance of such a thing is not that high.
And after all, your hardships have made you ten times wiser, so you will not let the same thing happen again!
You Deserve To Be Loved
I will try to help you as much as I can but now I will ask you to promise me one thing and that is that you’ll never forget that you deserve to be loved.
Don’t ever think that you’re not worthy of love just because someone in your past has made you feel so.
You are good enough. You are awesome. You are a true miracle. And no matter what happens, never forget that.
When you meet someone new, don’t think that you have to go out of your way to deserve their love or win their affection. No!
It’s true that you have to make an effort too (just like them) but don’t ever think that you are unworthy if you’re not giving 200% of yourself.
Tap Into Reality
Accept the fact that the dating world is a cruel place and there are high chances that you won’t find your special one on the first few dates but if you keep being persistent, I can promise you that you will!
The most important thing is to be honest with yourself and admit that the dating world sucks and spending a night on the couch with your favorite TV shows is far more enjoyable.
But no matter how much you are attached to your couch, it doesn’t have the same emotional needs as you have.
So, roll up your sleeves and keep in mind that it will not be easy but you can do it!
After all, you can never find the good until you’ve experienced the bad.
No matter how many times you repeated in your head that you’ll stay single forever, please, don’t forget to love yourself.
Don’t hate yourself for the fact that all of your friends are taken or perhaps married. The same thing waits for you, too!
The only difference is that they have experienced it earlier than you which doesn’t mean that you will.
Love all of yourself, your body and soul, and always think positively because you attract what you think.
If you keep thinking that you’ll stay single forever, you will attract negative things and keep disappointing yourself.
Love yourself enough to believe that things will change soon and you will enjoy spending time with your special one sooner than you might think.
Don’t Fall In Love With Everyone
While it is not good to have overly high standards, it is also not good to not have them at all.
Do not fall in love with everyone who shows a little bit of respect and appreciation for you.
Remember that it is normal for them to act so if they want to win you and show their affection to you.
Feel free to be picky sometimes (but remember, sometimes!) and don’t let your heart fall in love with every stranger with beautiful eyes and even more beautiful words.
Find the balance between your desire to love and your expectations.
Fall in love with someone who will inspire you to become a better person and who will fight for you no matter what and not because they have to but because they want to!
Try New Things
Don’t let your single label prevent you from indulging in trying new exciting things and spicing up your life from time to time.
Go on a journey, learn some new hobbies, find some new cooking recipes, look for some new exciting places to visit or whatever suits you.
Occupying yourself with new things is something that will help you stay in touch with yourself and refresh your life as well as your habits.
When you’re all into finding new ways of having fun, you will instantly appear ten times more attractive and the people around you will definitely notice it too!
Don’t Be Needy
Also, remember that there is a difference between wanting something and needing something.
If you’re going on dates just because you need other people’s approval or attention, this will not last long.
Firstly, you need to work on yourself and realize what it is that makes you feel this way.
The moment you start wanting something just for the sake of wanting, you will increase your chances of succeeding in your love life and your potential partner will recognize it too.
I know it sounds silly but people will be attracted to becoming a part of your life just because you don’t need them but you want them.
Know what you bring to the table and be someone who doesn’t NEED others to be happy.
Remember to first find your own happiness and then share it with others!
Don’t Expect Too Much
Always be reasonable when it comes to your expectations.
It is always better to have lower expectations than to imagine that things should be the way you see them and when you realize that this is not the case, you instantly get disappointed.
The golden rule when it comes to dating is to lower your expectations.
When you don’t have any assumptions or expectations about someone, you’re much more stress-free and that way you are protecting yourself from future disappointments.
Just go with the flow and act accordingly and you’ll see how much your love life will actually improve. Again, it’s all in your head!
Don’t let the dating world stress you out to the extent of giving up. ‘Love takes patience’ and never forget that.
The initial affection and connection that you might share with someone is just the first step when it comes to true love.
True love takes time and patience.
You have to be ready to invest all of your body and soul (and to expect the same of your partner) and still there will be some minor issues that you will have to deal with.
So, don’t be discouraged when something unexpected happens because that is just a part of the big thing called ‘true love’ that waits for you impatiently.
Make an effort, be patient and have understanding if things are not going the way you want them to at that moment.
Keep Living Your Best Life
Don’t ever let yourself dwell upon the sentence ‘I will be single forever’ and wait for others to prove to you how wrong you are.
Instead, keep living your best life, give chances to those you never thought of giving, be passionate, go wild and enjoy the little things!
After all, life is all about enjoying the present and not about constantly contemplating the future.
If you’re constantly thinking that you’ll never meet the one, you will deliberately prevent yourself from living your life to the fullest, which should be your priority.
Keep living your best life until you meet someone who is worthy of becoming a part of it.
It’s the only way to reaching the ultimate happiness, so never forget to stop and pick a flower or cuddle that fluffy cat that you keep meeting on the street. Just relax and enjoy!
You’re Not Going To Be Single Forever
In case you forgot, I will repeat it again to you: You are not going to be single forever! Period.
One day you’ll wake up, go for a walk and just the moment you start thinking about how you’ll stay single forever, you will meet the one.
I can promise you this because it happened to me. I know it sounds like a cliché but it happened to me when I least expected it.
So, don’t expect it and it will happen to you too! (Just kidding). Daydream about it, expect it, live it but do not stay still.
It is always better to live your perfect life even in dreams than to be totally pessimistic about your chances of meeting your special one.
Arm yourself with positivity, confidence and patience and believe me, things will start changing immediately!
Now, I’ll conclude my ‘preach’ with Billie Joe Armstrong’s words from one of Green Day’s songs: It’s something unpredictable but in the end it’s right.
I hope you had the time of your life. Good luck!