For one reason or another, we sometimes find ourselves in a situation where we don’t want to stand out; we prefer to remain silent and simply hold back.
But, what if this behavior is a common thing? You like to keep your private life to yourself, even from your closest people?
Do you consider yourself a calm person? Your friends keep saying how you should spice things up with some extraversion?
If you have found yourself in these questions, you may have a reserved personality type. What this kind of personality is, and how to recognize it, will be described in the following text, so stick around!
8 Signs That Say You Have Reserved Personality Type
Reserved personality traits include keeping opinions to yourself, enjoying your own company and only speaking when someone asks you a question.
If you, however, decide to speak, you will take a lot of time to choose what to say.
This is just a general definition to give you an idea of what reserved personality type represents. Below, we will elaborate on each trait of this personality individually.
1. Calmness Is The Cradle Of Your Power
Controlling your feelings is your superpower! You are the owner of your emotions, and nothing can stand in your way regarding that. This does not imply that you never feel nervous or angry, you just know how to react to those emotions properly.
Reacting quickly, impulsively and without thinking first is a trait that is inherent in all people. But you are not like other people, right?
Most of the time you don’t care what people think, but you have a great ability to sense the right time to approach a problem.
Knowing that the other person is currently experiencing a minor or major emotional disturbance and can’t think clearly, you will wait until things have calmed down before approaching that individual.
You will carefully take your time to think about what happened and find the best reaction to respond with. On top of that, if you realize that there is no need for a reaction at all, you simply won’t react.
Anyway, you should by no means think this is a negative quality! Embrace it! Love it!
2. You Often Find Yourself Being Shy
Although not a rule, reserved individuals can be shy. Being reserved is mostly a preference, but sometimes being shy is the initiator of such behavior.
Reserved personality type individuals could be shy because they lack a strong sense of confidence or self-assurance.
Being unable to speak about your feelings and problems is the biggest problem of them all. As shy people hardly talk about their feelings, no one truly understands them to the core, meaning they may not have that many close friends.
Keep calm, this is not an alarming sign! Making a hundred friends is not a miracle. The miracle is to make a single friend who will stand by your side even when hundreds are against you!
To summarize everything: don’t worry, it gets better once you realize that even the greatest extroverts have only a few true friends.
3. Emotional Stability Is Your Thing!
If you are a reserved person, emotional stability is nothing new to you and neuroticism is something you have never encountered.
You are known for being balanced and always stable. You can easily handle the ups and downs of life while still being effective and capable.
Emotional stability can bring out the best and worst in you, it’s your decision:
Better ability to concentrate
Your productivity and success will be significantly higher because you don’t experience anxiety and panic. Also, since you are aware of your emotions and what you want from work along with this strong focus, you may be hardworking as well.
One thing is certain: problems and criticism will accompany us throughout our lives. Everyone deals with different issues. Some of us simply have the proper understanding of how to handle it.
Enhanced objectivity comes naturally with emotional stability. Therefore, you may have the power to approach your own problems more objectively.
Emotional stability is a weapon, and when it falls into bad hands, it can be used for manipulation. From sarcasm, subtle and indirect mocking, and clever lying emerges a pattern called emotional bullying! Be aware!
4. You Are A Shadow Hunter
Many people will say that they don’t like being in the shadow of someone… or something. But that’s not the case with you!
Maybe you love the shadows, but that doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t want to be recognized and valued. You love the inner world you created for yourself.
The limelight is absolutely not something that you as a reserved individual seek!
5. Alone Time Is Your Best Time
Of course, humans are social creatures. Everybody loves good company. However, as a person with a reserved personality type, you probably prefer social isolation and avoiding places with a lot of people as you consider it bad for your mental health.
Spending time by yourself benefits various aspects of your life:
• Creativity – when you are by yourself, you can increase your creativity and allow your mind to roam.
• Individual exploration – being alone is the only time you can really grow. It is the time when you indulge your interests and desires completely. You enjoy an environment where no one will control or judge you.
• Social energy – living alone is often seen as something bad. Although, studies have shown that those who live alone may have a more vibrant social life and greater social energy than those who share a home.
6. Self-sufficiency – Your Greatest Wealth
If you already like spending time alone, this trait comes naturally. So, as a self-sufficient person, you rely on your own abilities and efforts.
• All your problems and complaints can be solved independently.
• Self-sufficiency enables you to experience happiness independently, in yourself, and about yourself—without depending on others.
• You develop self-awareness and self-compassion.
• Provides you with a perspective that consequently provides you direction.
7. You Don’t Say Hop Until You Jump Over
Never assume that someone who is reserved faced a problem and didn’t analyze it thoroughly afterwards.
One of the most prominent traits of this type of personality is definitely deep thinking. This feature is imposed by itself as a result of calmness, self-sufficiency and emotional stability.
As a deep thinker, you avoid even small talk with yourself. You question everything and carefully calculate every step you take.
You believe that nothing should be rushed because every step toward true accomplishment needs to be considered.
Although you prefer to avoid social situations, you enjoy lurking in the background and observing and analyzing people.
Once you have fully analyzed a topic, you only share those deep thoughts with a few close people.
8. You Show Gratitude To Everything
You definitely know how to enjoy! Being restrained makes life less hectic for others around them, allowing them to make space in their lives for appreciation.
They frequently have lower standards for themselves, others, and circumstances, which makes them more likely to accept things as they are and make the most of them.
You are also known to be quite reflective since you can step back and consider the situation. This encourages you to enjoy each moment rather than rush through situations or continually pursue temporary thrills.
Reserved vs Introverted Personality
The eternal question: what is the difference between introversion and being reserved? Is there any? A common misconception.
The right answer is yes, there are a few differences, but they are minor.
When it comes to being alone, an introverted person needs that time for their well-being and to gain their energy. On the contrary, a reserved person is someone who wants to keep their opinion to themselves.
For instance, both the introvert and the reserved person are found in a large group of people. The introvert may not talk as that exhausts them, while the reserved person may not talk as they simply don’t feel like talking.
Although it’s not excluded that reserved individuals can be introverts, most often they are ambiverts with introversion as the dominant trait.
This means that an ambivert demonstrates introverted traits when around strangers or individuals they are not close to, and extrovert traits when with their friends.
Related: Ambivert Vs. Omnivert: Key Traits And Differences
How To Be More Social?
External stimuli can be very exhausting for a reserved person, sometimes even frustrating. The right approach to becoming more social is to take advantage of the external stimuli you can actually tolerate.
Those things that you can’t tolerate and that are holding you back, but belong to the domain of your type of personality, will spontaneously unravel as you begin with the easy, baby steps.
For example, you always loved being in the shadows. But last night you stole the limelight at a business dinner. You loved the feeling when everybody laughed at your silly joke!
Yes, this is a good way to slowly open up! There are plenty of other ways.
Be Friends With Other Reserved People
Keep yourself in the company of like-minded people or those who respect your reserved personality to help prevent unwanted comparisons.
You can stop viewing other people as rivals and start seeing them as a helpful group of people with similar aims by surrounding yourself with like-minded individuals.
Once you become friends, you will stop looking at other people as rivals. Instead, they will become a helpful group of people with similar perspectives.
Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone
Knowing how to distinguish when it is best to step out of your comfort zone and when to stay reserved and in the shadows is a real skill.
For instance, speaking up about something you’ve been thinking about for a while can be a better option than keeping it to yourself.
Maybe your boss likes to get feedback from you and your colleagues and you are too shy to speak in front of them.
Stop Comparing Yourself To Others
Although reserved people tend to be goal-oriented and disciplined, they may lack the competitive qualities of other people.
This, together with their comfort zone, makes a bad combination leaving you with thoughts that you are not good enough and that you are defeated.
Don’t let this comparison be the thief of your joy! You should only compare yourself to the person you were yesterday.
This will help you stay concentrated and make the best version of yourself!
Maintain Close Relationships
Remember the value of speaking and maintaining a connection with someone you are close to, instead of talking briefly to a lot of people.
Talking briefly to many people may only exhaust you so you won’t have the strength to maintain important relationships.
Know Your Advantages
Even though it could seem like a disadvantage to be quiet and reserved in a room full of chatty individuals, it doesn’t have to be when you play to your advantage.
Being reserved allows you to process information fast, study social dynamics, and pick up on important details that others might overlook.
What Causes Someone To Be Reserved?
Some of the causes of being reserved include being hurt in previous relationships with other people after opening up. Here we’re talking about having trust issues and as a result becoming reserved towards others.
Some people are reserved because they prefer keeping their personal life private. Reasons for that could be personal or professional. Being reserved is also connected to enjoying solitude. Yup, there are people who feel better in their own company than in the company of other people.
How To Deal With A Reserved Person?
• If they are silent, don’t let your first thought be that they don’t have an opinion. As mentioned above, reserved people like to talk only if they are asked. Don’t hesitate to ask for opinions and encourage them to express them.
• Don’t rush them. Reserved individuals like to have their time to make an opinion properly. Hence, give them the time they need, and you will get a more insightful response.
• Try to skip the small talk carefully and instead focus on having a meaningful conversation to connect with them.
• Be moderate when asking personal questions. This is especially important since a reserved person doesn’t let other people into their life so easily.
• Know that just because they are reserved, it doesn’t imply they don’t like you or don’t want to spend time with you – ask them for a coffee or dinner!
People with reserved personality types are often wrongly accused as being rude, uninterested or even introverts. They are anything but that.
Characteristics of a reserved person are difficult to spot – particularly because of these misconceptions.
They tend to build their own world and love to cherish it with emotional stability, deep thoughts and calmness. They don’t depend on anyone and are extremely self-sufficient. extremely
Often mistaken for introverts, reserved people just don’t like expressing their opinion.
Even though a personality type is something you can’t change from the core, slight modifications that will help you and the people around you are possible. It just takes a lot of time and effort!
After reading this article, I hope all of you will have a better understanding of what it means to be a reserved person and not to judge too quickly!