Age is nothing but a number, am I right? Many couples with a major age gap will probably applaud me for this sentence.
On the other hand, those who haven’t experienced a relationship with someone much younger or older simply don’t get it. You won’t ask this out loud, but I’m sure you keep wondering, “What’s the catch?”
What attracts an older man to a younger woman and vice versa? Why is this type of romance more common than ever?
If you read on, I’ll help you dig beneath the surface and get to the bottom of this phenomenon.
What Attracts An Older Man To A Younger Woman?
These are the most common reasons older men are so crazy for younger girls:
1. Physical attractiveness
The first thing that attracts an old man to a young woman is her physical attractiveness. Let’s be honest here – he might fall in love with her awesome personality later on, but when a man starts playing the dating game with a woman, he has no clue about the type of person she is.
The only thing he sees is her amazing body and beautiful face. And without insulting anyone, most younger females look better than those who are older.
After all, it’s perfectly natural, and that’s how aging works.
So, when this guy looks at himself, when he looks at the women his age, and finally when he takes a look at this young woman standing next to him, it’s normal for him to feel physical attraction.
Of course, some men will leave it at that, while others will act on this attraction.
And let’s not forget one important detail: every guy in the world will picture this beautiful young woman walking next to him. No matter how old they are, men make other men jealous.
The moment he starts courting a younger woman, he will start thinking about his friends’ faces when they see such a bombshell next to him.
Does this mean that he sees her as his trophy? Absolutely yes!
2. Being an alpha male
What attracts an older man to a younger woman? Well, the moment men enter their early 40s, most of them start experiencing a midlife crisis.
Among other things, they get paranoid that they’ve lost their macho side. They’re not as attractive and as physically strong as they once were.
New, improved, and better specimens have appeared. Younger versions of the men they used to be have appeared on the market and removed them from the equation.
So, a man in his early 40s will start to get worried. He’ll think that he’s lost his charm and that he is no longer the alpha male he used to be. And that will scare the hell out of him.
Therefore, when he finds a younger partner at an older age, he is actually showing himself and the rest of the world that he still has what it takes. Let the world hear that this man is still a tough guy who can have whichever girl he wants!
He can compete with all of these younger men! He is capable of winning over and dating younger women despite the age difference!
3. A chance to relive his youth
Humanity, in general, is obsessed with immortality. It has been like this since the beginning of time. We’re all terrified by the idea of getting older and losing our youth.
Well, men are champions of this, and they’ll use every chance they get to feel young again, no matter how old they actually are. And what better way for a man to relive his youth than by dating a younger woman?
When he is around her, he forgets about the age gap. Most importantly, he forgets about his own age. In his head, he is as old as her, and that’s what makes him happy.
He doesn’t need to look for any more excuses to do things that are not socially appropriate for his age.
Does he want to go clubbing every other night, including weeknights? Now he has a companion for that.
Does he want to hang out with younger people? He’ll just start spending time with her friends.
The examples are endless, but I’m sure you see where I’m going. A lot of older people feel this need, and this is one of the ways to fulfill it.
4. Escaping the rut
After reaching a certain point in your life, every day becomes pretty much the same. You get up, go to work, have lunch, watch some TV, fall asleep, and desperately wait for the weekend.
At some point, older guys realize that this is not how they want to live their lives for the rest of their days. They wake up one morning, and it hits them: they’re missing out on a lot.
They’re not truly living – they’re only surviving day after day. So, what can they do about it?
Will they find a tired woman of their age who is also stuck in her own rut? Of course not!
On the contrary, they’ll find someone who will help them create new habits. They will find a woman with less life experience but a more diverse lifestyle.
That’s right, they will find a twenty or thirty-year-old woman who will get him out of this rut. Or, even better, a woman who will give him the energy to escape it himself.
With her, he’ll start enjoying every breath he takes. He doesn’t necessarily have to fall in love with her, but he’ll most definitely fall in love with every new day that comes.
5. …and his comfort zone
But his rut is not the only thing a younger woman helps an older man escape.
He is also stuck in his comfort zone. However, the trick is that he is completely unaware of it until he meets a younger woman who suddenly shows him the way.
This is a man who can’t think of the last time he’s done something different, something that scared him. For as long as he can remember, he’s been following the rules.
He’s done everything by the book: graduated college, got a steady job, probably got married, and had kids. From the outside, his life looks pretty perfect. It’s the embodiment of the American dream.
However, deep inside, he’s been miserable for years. He knows what will happen the next day and what to expect from his life months from now.
He sticks to his usual routine and his usual way of doing things. He sticks with a job he hates, hangs out with people he can’t stand, and does everything a man his age is supposed to do.
Nevertheless, he is not truly happy – he is just comfortable. Well, when he meets a woman with a big age difference, she has what it takes to shake him up a bit. And that’s exactly what he needed to feel alive again.
6. Less responsibility
What attracts an older man to a younger woman is, without a doubt, the chance to have less responsibility in a relationship.
Let’s say you’re a woman in your twenties. You don’t mind wasting a couple of months or even years of your life on a guy you’re having fun with, even though there is no future with him.
You’re not obsessed with commitment, and you don’t ask him to tell you where your relationship is going. After all, you’re not thinking about settling down just yet, either. You live day by day without worrying about what will happen next.
On the other hand, women in their late thirties and forties – that is, women who are this man’s age – rarely think this way. On the contrary, in most cases, they won’t even start a relationship that is doomed to fail from the start.
This woman’s biological clock is ticking, and if she lets a man into her life, it will be a man who isn’t afraid of commitment and who wants to start a family soon.
In the middle of this entire mess, some older men suffer from commitment phobia. Instead of settling down, they want to have fun and jump from one relationship to another.
They’re not ready to take on any responsibility and aren’t thinking about starting a family. These guys think that they have all the time in the world to marry and have kids – if they decide, they can physically do it years from now.
So who do they choose to be their partner? Well, isn’t the answer self-explanatory?
7. No emotional baggage
When you reach a certain age, it’s inevitable to have some experience when it comes to love and romance. While some people see it as a good quality because you now know what you want and don’t want, others are scared of their potential partner’s emotional baggage.
Therefore, if you’re wondering what attracts an older man to a younger woman, one of the answers would be the absence of emotional baggage. A young girl may not have a serious relationship behind her.
She wasn’t hurt by some toxic man, so she doesn’t come with abandonment traumas, trust issues, and other wounds. She won’t bring her heartbreaks and fears into this new relationship.
She is open-hearted and definitely less careful about letting someone new in.
On the other hand, an older woman has probably seen a lot in her past. She’s been through one or several major heartbreaks. She doesn’t trust men as easily, and she is dealing with a bunch of issues.
But don’t older guys have their share of emotional baggage as well, you must wonder? They most certainly do.
So, how is it fair for them to exclude a whole age group just because of something they are dealing with? Well, who said life was fair? Of course that this shouldn’t be the criteria, but here we are.
8. A chance for an adventure
Many old guys see dating younger women as an adventure. They don’t care if they’ll break these girls’ hearts in the process, and they don’t see this relationship as something wrong.
While a young woman is probably thinking that she’s found the one, an older guy knows that this romance has an expiration date from the first time they meet. He sees it as nothing more than a fling – an opportunity to try out something new.
In this case, this girl is just an object to him – a tool that helps him fulfill his fantasy.
He is looking for a partner who will bring some fun and excitement to his boring life.
Someone he can go bungee jumping with while he pretends that he doesn’t have a sore back. He is looking for a woman he can pull a one-nighter with while he pretends that he’s perfectly fine with going to work after not sleeping all night.
Yes, this includes sexual adventures as well. He is checking to see if he’s become rusty and sees this as a chance to experiment.
Of course, this is never a long-term arrangement. After all, it can’t be. This man is pretending to be someone he’s not, which can never be permanent.
To him, this girl is just a toy. And the moment he’s done playing, she is out of his life.
9. Less emotional maturity
You’d be surprised by the number of men who reach a certain age without ever reaching emotional maturity. These guys are completely unaware of themselves, don’t know how to communicate properly, suppress their emotions, and basically have no clue what a healthy relationship is.
So, when they get stuck with a woman their age who is, in most cases, much more mature than them, they feel totally lost. I mean, this is a woman who expects them to talk about their feelings, be in touch with their vulnerable side, and actually communicate their needs.
Who’s got time for that? Of course, I’m just kidding, but sadly, this is how many men think.
At the same time, it’s perfectly reasonable for a younger woman to be less mature than an older one. To put things simply: for an older guy, dating a younger girl means dating someone on the same level of emotional maturity as him.
10. Desire for dominance
A younger female is more likely to be submissive. No, I’m not only talking about in the bedroom (even though that is also included) – I’m talking about in every aspect of life.
The type of man who wants to date a younger female is usually the controlling type – one who doesn’t want a life partner and prefers a puppet instead.
He hopes that this girl will let him order her around and tell her what she should do with her life under the guise of taking care of her. And if he finds a girl with daddy issues, he’s hit the jackpot.
For this kind of man, equality doesn’t exist in a relationship. He’s the leader of the pack, and she should follow him around.
Of course, he could hardly accomplish something like this with a woman his age. An older lady is emotionally and financially independent, and the last thing she plans on doing is allowing a man to control her life.
11. Validation and admiration
Finally, there are a lot of older men who crave admiration and validation. And for this kind of guy, it’s much easier to impress a girl half their age than a woman who’s as experienced as he is.
This is the type of man who wants to be applauded. He enjoys nothing more than compliments from his younger partner.
She triggers his hero instinct, and he is here to save her from all the evils of this wicked world. He is her Prince Charming, who’ll show her the way through the darkness while she applauds him for all of his abilities.
In this case, we’re talking about a man who has some serious self-esteem problems. He knows he could never get the “wow” effect with someone his age, so he looks for a younger SO to boost his ego.
See also: What Do Men In Their 50s Want In A Woman? Top 15 Things
What Attracts A Younger Woman To A Older Man?
We’ve established what attracts an older man to a younger woman. But what attracts a younger woman to an older man? Here are the most common reasons:
Some women are subconsciously looking for a father figure in their potential partner. They’re completely unaware that they struggle with some serious daddy issues.
When this is the case, dating older men means getting everything they didn’t get from their fathers when they were little girls.
Let’s get one thing straight: not every woman who seeks financial security is a gold digger. Yes, there are those who are looking for a sugar daddy.
But on the other hand, there are also those who are sick and tired of lazy young men they have to support financially. So they choose to date older people who can keep up with them!
A lot of women date older men due to their life experiences. They admire these guys because they can learn something from them – it’s as simple as that.
Responsibility and maturity
Unlike younger guys, most old men know what it means to be responsible and mature. They’re not into immature dating games – they know what they want and aren’t afraid to get it. What more could a girl wish for?
Better sex life
Whether they want to admit it or not, a lot of young men have no clue what they’re doing in the bedroom. They’re still exploring and searching for themselves.
On the other hand, the average older guy is much more experienced. He knows how to please a woman, and that’s exactly what attracts younger females to him.
See also: 10 Disadvantages Of Marrying An Older Man (+ Benefits)
What Is It Called When An Older Man Likes A Younger Girl?
When an older man likes a younger girl, he’s called a manther. The word derives from the words man and panther.
Manthers are middle-aged men who chase younger females who are not older than 30. However, manthers are men who only actively look for younger companions and, in most cases, are only interested in sleeping with them.
You’re not a manther if you happen to fall in love with a woman who is younger than you. But if you serially date younger girls without the intention of building a serious relationship with any of them, you fit the profile.
What Does An Older Man Look For In A Woman?
If they’re looking for something temporary, older guys want a girl who is fun to be around. They want someone who makes them feel alive and who will help them feel young again.
On the other hand, if an old man wants a life companion and a forever person, he’ll look for a sense of security, commitment, loyalty, and someone he can trust. At his age, he won’t only settle for a lover – he’ll want a best friend too.
To Wrap Up:
Now that you know what attracts an older man to a younger woman and vice versa, I’m sure you’re wondering if any compatibility is possible in this case. Well, I’ll have to ask you to forget about your prejudices and say absolutely yes.
You can’t order your heart around. Despite the initial reasons these relationships usually start, a lot of them succeed because both an old man and a young woman realize they’ve finally found what they’ve been looking for all along.
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