When an old friend contacts you out of the blue, you can’t help but wonder what it could possibly mean. You can’t remember when the last time you heard from them was, so this is quite unusual.
Well, luckily, you no longer have to rack your brain. Read on to find out what could be hidden behind their phone call or text message.
When An Old Friend Contacts You Out Of The Blue: 12 Possible Meanings
Check out these reasons and see which one could relate most to your former friend:
1. Nostalgia hit them
One of the first reasons your good friend contacted you all of a sudden could be nostalgia. Maybe you got a friend request on social media or a text message from them – it doesn’t really matter.
The bottom line is that you two share some beautiful memories together. Even though you don’t know it, they think of these times frequently.
They sincerely hope that you haven’t forgotten about them either. They hope that you remember all the fun you two had.
This is especially true if we’re talking about a high school or childhood friend. Years have passed since you two spent time together.
Nevertheless, you were close friends once. And you’re probably the only thing connecting this person to the good old days. So, they just want to talk about the past and reminisce.
2. They’ve realized you’re nowhere to be found
Have you ever been in a situation when an ex who broke your heart and hurt you in the worst possible way tries to crawl back into your life ages after the break-up? I mean, of course, you have, it’s what always happens.
Why? Well, it’s because they realize what they’ve lost only after you’re gone. And that’s exactly what happened to that best friend who did you harm.
They’ve spent years looking for you. They were convinced that finding a friend like you would be a piece of cake.
A lot of people will welcome them with open arms – they will give them the love, comfort, and devotion you offered.
But tough break, none of that happened. They spent an entire eternity looking for you just to realize that you were nowhere to be found.
And now, they want to go back to the old days. Your ex-friend wants to continue exactly where you two left off as if nothing happened because they see you as their soulmate friend.
Well, if I were you, I would just wish them good luck with that. Why didn’t they appreciate you while you were around?
3. They want to apologize
On the other hand, there are people who know that they’ve made a mistake and feel guilty about it. So, when an old friend contacts you out of the blue, it might be because they want to apologize.
There is no desire for reconnecting here. Maybe they just want to meet up to tell you that they’re sorry or to thank you for everything.
Why does it matter now? Well, they’ve obviously grown as a person. They’re probably replaying their entire life back and forth in their head, and they’ve realized they treated you wrong.
Basically, they want to get this off their chest. They need your forgiveness to move on and clear their conscience.
Or maybe somebody else was giving them a hard time. Maybe they took a walk in your shoes, which made them understand your point of view.
In that case, if you are able to forgive them, don’t torture them anymore. Tell them that you accept their apology and move on with your life.
4. They’ve changed
When an old friend contacts you out of the blue, they’ve probably changed a lot. They’re not the same person they were the first time your friendship ended.
I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “right person, wrong time.” Even though most people connect this line with romantic love, it can be applied to friendship as well.
Your former friend is aware of your qualities. They know that you’re someone they want to spend time with.
But when you first used to hang out, you were too immature to realize the true meaning of friendship. Luckily, now, you’ve both grown, and that has changed.
It means that it’s time for a second chance. Besides, you two didn’t end your friendship on bad terms. You didn’t have a major fallout – you just lost touch.
There were no insults, no backstabbing, or anything like that. You drifted apart because you didn’t appreciate each other, and that’s all.
5. Or they remained the same
Or maybe they’ve remained exactly the same person they were in the past. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not claiming that they haven’t made any progress whatsoever.
But at the end of the day, they’re not the person they were last month or even last year. Deep down, they’re still the person they were when you two were best friends.
This means that you’re the only one who knows the essence of their being. They’ve tried spending time with new friends, but each one of them was missing something.
They were all interested in this new version of themselves while you’re the only one who accepted them truly for who they are.
Are they interested in reconnecting? Without a doubt, yes. You have to be aware that this person doesn’t only see you as their friend. To them, you’re a family member!
6. Something reminded you of them
They haven’t called you in ages, and truth be told, you haven’t even crossed their mind all of this time. But recently, they saw a mutual friend or coworker who mentioned you.
Or they heard your favorite song. Maybe they ran into someone who looked just like you.
Whatever happened, the bottom line is that your entire friendship went through their mind. They’ve had a major flashback, and they remembered you.
But the point is that they kept thinking of you for days after something or someone reminded them of you. And that’s when they knew they had to reach out to you, no matter what! Of course, that’s exactly what they did.
At the end of the day, they don’t know what they want from you. Is this a chance to reconnect?
Will you just meet up the next day to catch up about old times? Will you build a long-distance friendship? Who knows – all options are on the table.
7. They want closure
When you break up a long-term relationship, it’s natural that you want to know why it happened. When did things start going downhill?
Was it something you did? Could you have done anything to prevent the end of your relationship? Did something in particular happen the last time you saw each other that made them cut you out of their life?
No, these questions don’t only apply to romantic relationships. The same goes with friendships as well. After all, it’s also a type of relationship, and there is nothing wrong with wanting closure.
Well, when an old friend contacts you out of the blue, that’s exactly what they’re looking for. Maybe they don’t plan on coming back into your life.
On the contrary, they just want to end that chapter of their life so they can start over.
Obviously, everything that happened between you two left a big influence on their life. And if they ask you for closure, give it to them – that would be the only fair thing to do.
8. They want to chat
When an old friend contacts you out of the blue, you immediately assume that there is something huge or secretive hidden behind it. But the truth is that things don’t have to be so complicated.
Maybe they’re not here to ask for a kidney or gossip about your mutual friends. Maybe your former friend just wants to chat.
Of course, this is possible only if you two didn’t have a huge fallout and just lost touch over time. You didn’t have a big fight, and nobody hurt anyone.
So, why wouldn’t they want to see what you’ve been up to? I won’t say that they necessarily miss you, but you’ve definitely crossed their mind, and they just wanted to see if there is anything new going on in your life.
Or they were just bored and had nothing better to do. Either way, you don’t have to look too deep into it.
9. They’re in a bad place in life
When an old friend contacts you out of the blue, they might be asking for help. I don’t know if we’re talking about a bad break-up, a family emergency, a mental health issue, or something completely different.
The bottom line is that they see you as their last chance of salvation.
Look, they won’t tell you they need a hand straight away. Instead, they’ll just ask you to meet up, and if you’re willing to see them, they might open up.
Why did they think of you, you must ask? After all, you can’t remember when the last time you talked was, and you’re sure that they’ve found new friends in the meantime.
Well, I guess that you’re still the only one they trust, no matter what. The only one who will stand by them through everything, understand them, and won’t leave them when they need someone the most.
They can have alot of close friends, but you’re their one and only bestie!
What to do?
I get it that you’re facing a serious dilemma. On the one hand, you feel like they’re using you.
Everyone else left them behind, so now they thought of you. Where were they all this time?
But if you look at things from a different perspective, you should actually be honored. They could have asked for anyone’s help, but they chose you! If that doesn’t make you feel special, I don’t know what does.
10. They need a favor
I’ve given your former friend the benefit of the doubt until now. But this is the moment when we have to tackle what you don’t want to hear as well.
Yes, it’s possible that they need a favor and nothing else. Maybe they want you to lend them money, take care of their kids, drive them somewhere, give your recommendation on something…
The examples are endless, but when an old friend contacts you out of the blue, this is one of the common reasons for it.
If you are in this kind of situation, don’t feel responsible to help them.
Were they ever around to give you a hand? Did they ever ask you how you’ve been?
They have no shame and no dignity, and they don’t deserve a response from you, let alone anything more.
I mean, what are you? Goodwill? An emergency room?
11. You’re a suitable victim
The harsh truth is that this person ruined your mental health. This has always been a one-sided friendship, and they were never your real friend.
Your toxic friend bullied you and destroyed your self-esteem. They never respected you or treated you like their best friend. You went through emotional abuse from them, and everything they did to you left traces on your heart and soul.
The honest truth is that it took you way too long to get over all of this, let alone find new friends.
And just when you were nearing the end of your healing journey, they reappeared in your life.
Do they repent for everything? Are they here because they want to apologize? I hate to break it to you, but no.
You’re dealing with an abuser who thinks of you as a suitable victim – nothing more!
12. A pyramid scheme
When an old friend contacts you out of the blue, they might be involved in MLM (multi-level marketing) or a pyramid scheme. I know you’ve seen alot of memes and jokes regarding this topic, but trust me – we’ll all get a similar phone call one of these days.
I have to admit, this is a tough situation. On the one hand, you don’t want to waste your time listening to their nonsense.
But at the same time, we’re talking about someone you’ve been so close to. You can’t just hang up on them.
The best thing to do is to be as polite as possible. But don’t forget to be firm at the same time because trust me, they will use your vulnerabilities against you.
Just tell them that you’re busy and that you’ll call them the next day. Let’s face it – you won’t, but do you have any other option at this point?
Is It Weird To Reach Out To Old Friends?
If you have something to say to them, there is nothing wrong with contacting an old friend. However, you have to find the best way to do it.
If you haven’t talked to each other in a long time, maybe it’s better to send them a text message or friend request before calling them out of the blue.
What Do You Say When A Long-Lost Friend Contacts You?
Here’s a list of phrases to say when you hear from a long-lost friend.
1. “Hey, what’s up?”
2. “I’ve been just thinking about you.”
3. “Long time no see.”
4. “I must admit that I’ve missed you.”
5. “I just mentioned you to a mutual friend the other day.”
Is It Okay To Talk To Old Friends?
There is nothing wrong with talking to old friends. But before giving yourself a detailed answer to this question, you have to wonder why you two parted ways in the first place.
Don’t welcome them with open arms if they broke your heart. Please be careful about the second chances you give away.
To Wrap Up:
When an old friend contacts you out of the blue, I really hope they’ll bring you good news. I wish you two reconnect and rebuild your friendship.
I hope it’s not because they want to drag you into their MLM scheme or shamelessly ask for a favor.
But even if that happens, they’re the ones who should be embarrassed – not you.