You’ve been dating the same guy for a long time, but it seems like he’ll never be ready to take your relationship to a more serious level. You want to know when to stop waiting for him to propose because you’re afraid you may be wasting your time on the wrong man.
Your guy may be planning a surprise engagement right now, but he may also be a jerk who hates the idea of marriage and is only stringing you along.
The point is that you should figure out which type of man he indeed is and do it ASAP. The more you continue waiting for him, the harder it will be to leave him once reality hits.
When To Stop Waiting For Him To Propose: 13 Signs That Show It’s Time To Give Up
The moment you start noticing these subtle hints is when you should start thinking about ending your relationship. Unfortunately, all of these are red flags that your man won’t propose to you or, at least, that it won’t happen any time soon.
1. He completely avoids marriage proposal talks
When a man always tries to avoid discussing a marriage proposal, it’s clear that he’s avoiding that topic because marriage is something he still hasn’t thought about.
Sometimes, it’s because of practicality (money issues or work ambitions), but in most cases, it’s because men are afraid of that kind of commitment.
2. Or, he gives you stupid reasons that change every time
There are other types of guys too. Ones who don’t avoid talking about a marriage proposal but who also offer you a stupid excuse every time about why they can’t do it right now.
Either they’ll say that they don’t have time for wedding planning right now, that they need to get their personal life together first, or that it’s too soon to take such a serious step even though you’ve been dating for years.
It’s okay if a man postpones marriage talk once or twice while giving you a good reason for it, but if he keeps offering lame excuses why you can’t get married, you should consider it a huge red flag.
It’s obvious that he’s stringing you along and making you believe that he’ll marry you one day, even though he knows very well it’s not his end goal.
3. He doesn’t care about your feelings at all
Even though men tend to play dumb with us sometimes, they understand us perfectly and how certain things make us feel. If you’ve been dating for a while, I’m sure your man knows how much you care about taking the next step in your relationship.
Ignoring you when you start to talk about it or trying to avoid those kinds of conversations hurts your feelings, and he’s well aware of it. Unfortunately, he just doesn’t care.
He doesn’t care about you and your feelings. If he did, he would already be thinking of romantic proposal ideas and talking to you about wedding planning.
4. He hates and avoids wedding receptions
Whenever you get a wedding invitation from your mutual friends, family members, or coworkers, he tries to avoid going with you to that wedding.
It could be that he really hates wedding parties, but the truth is, when you love someone, sometimes you need to do things you don’t particularly like. Especially when you know your partner cares about those things deeply.
However, I’m pretty sure he avoids going to those kinds of gatherings because he doesn’t want you to get all excited and start pressuring him with talks about getting married.
5. You can’t say for sure that you’re in a committed relationship
It’s because you are not, and you’re aware of this even though you’re head over heels in love with your man. There is nothing you would want more than to be in a committed relationship with him right now, but you know that this is not the case.
If you crave solid commitment and true love, unfortunately, it’s time to look for it in a different place because it’s all too obvious that you won’t find it in your current relationship.
6. He doesn’t work on his fear of commitment
There are so many men who have a fear of commitment, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. However, it’s wrong when they’re aware of it and don’t do anything to change it.
You know why that is? It’s because they don’t care about their partner, and they aren’t afraid of losing them because they know that their fear of commitment may drive their better half away.
If your man is one of those men, I’m sorry to have break it to you, but you should break up with him, and you should do it ASAP. Your man won’t change, and you’ll continue breaking your own heart with the false hope that he might pop the question one day.
7. You’ve heard rumors about him cheating on you
My ex, the one I was waiting forever to propose, and I were in a long-term relationship where we shared many important life events, and I was sure that he was the man I was going to spend the rest of my life with.
So many people said that he wasn’t faithful to me, and there were many red flags that proved this, but I decided to turn a blind eye to it all. It wasn’t until I saw all the loving Facebook comments he was leaving on other women’s photos and posts.
I still remember it like it was yesterday. We should’ve celebrated the New Year together, but he said that he had to go on a work trip the day before and packed his bags. That night I discovered all the proof of his infidelity and made the decision that I never wanted to see him again.
If you’ve seen signs of his infidelity or someone tried to warn you about it, please don’t ignore it. It’s probably true, and it’s why he still hasn’t proposed to you and probably never will.
8. His family doesn’t approve of it, and he’s too attached to them
Do you know that the highest breakup/divorce rate is with couples whose families don’t approve of their relationships/marriages? Unfortunately, no matter how strong the love and connection between the partners are, it’s simply too difficult to fight with such pressure.
So, if you know that your boyfriend’s family doesn’t have a good opinion of your relationship and is strongly against it, you should look no further because that’s why your man still hasn’t popped the question.
In this case, you should be understanding. As hard it is for you, it’s even harder for your man because he feels like he needs to choose between the woman he loves and his family, and that’s a situation no man should ever experience.
Related: What Should I Do When My Husband Chooses His Family Over Me?
9. He’s immature and doesn’t think about the future at all
Have you ever made any plans for the future together? Have you ever even spoken about it? Does he share his future goals with you?
If he even avoids talking about his own future, it’s probably because he doesn’t have a clue how it’s going to look. When a man doesn’t have any dreams and goals for the future, it’s a clear sign of immaturity, and waiting for an immature boy to propose to you is futile.
10. Your relationship isn’t the way it used to be
You’ve noticed that he’s changed, and your relationship has changed with him. You don’t spend as much time together anymore, date nights are forgotten, and you’ve become more like two friends than romantic partners.
Perhaps your partner is aware of these changes, and even if he intended to propose to you one day, he’s having second thoughts about it now.
You can wait, but I think things are pretty clear here… You don’t love each other the way you used to, and it’s obvious now that you aren’t soulmates. In that case, getting married would be a huge mistake for both of you.
11. You already gave him an ultimatum, and he ignored it
Have you already given him an ultimatum regarding a marriage proposal, and he ignored it completely? Even if you made it clear that you’d break up with him if he doesn’t show any signs he’s going to marry you soon?
Is it really necessary to say anything right now? If this isn’t a good enough sign that he doesn’t care about you and has no intention of marrying you, I don’t know what is then.
12. It seems like he isn’t afraid of losing you
It doesn’t just seem like it, but it’s so obvious that your man is not afraid of losing you. He’s aware that it might happen if he doesn’t pop the question any time soon, but it doesn’t bother him at all.
Maybe he does love you, but he certainly doesn’t love you as much as you love him or as much as you deserve to be loved. The right man will love you the way you deserve to be loved, and his biggest fear in life would be losing you…
13. He’s made it clear that marriage isn’t one of his end goals
If your man has made it loud and clear that he never plans to get married or that it won’t happen any time soon, then what are you still doing with that kind of man?
Is there any point in waiting for him to propose? I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but I don’t see him as the culprit, but you are. He’s sincere with his intentions, and you’re allowing false hope to keep you by his side and break your heart little by little every day.
See also: How To Get Him To Propose – 20 Simple But Efficient Tactics
How Long Is Too Long To Wait For Him To Propose?
This is a very difficult question to answer because it really depends. One thing is for sure, though, you can’t wait for him forever because it’s definitely too long, and you’re being unfair to yourself and wasting your life on an indecisive man.
Most relationship experts agree that one to three years is enough time for a man to make up his mind about whether he should propose to his partner or not.
Although, I know so many couples who dated for six years or longer and then decided to get married, and they have happy marriages years later. On the other hand, I also know so many men who decided to propose to their GFs after only a year of dating, and it ended up as the worst decision they ever made.
The bottom line is, you know best, and only you will know when enough is enough. Although, in my opinion, you don’t need that much time to know whether you love someone and if you want to be with that person for the rest of your life.
Why Do Men Wait So Long To Propose?
There are many reasons why men play the waiting game when it comes to proposing to the girl they’re dating. Some of those reasons are justified, and some of them are beyond stupid and immature.
Some of the justifiable reasons include waiting for the perfect opportunity, waiting to become financially stable, wanting to be 100% sure that it’s the right decision, getting their life together, and similar.
On the other hand, some men take forever to propose to the girl they’re dating because of their fear of commitment, self-worth issues, other people interfering, and not being able to give up on the single life.
The worst thing is that some of these reasons would be justified if only those men were ready to work on improving themselves and changing what is stopping them from proposing to the girl they love.
To Put It All Together
The number 13 has a very bad reputation because so many people consider it unlucky. However, I need to disagree because these 13 subtle hints saved my heart and made me realize that I shouldn’t be wasting a minute more on a man who isn’t ready to love me.
I also hope it helped you figure out when to stop waiting for him to propose. If you’ve recognized most of these signs, as much as it seems heartbreaking to you now, you must let go of that man.
It’s clear that he isn’t even thinking about marrying you and has no intention of doing so any time soon. Moving on from a long-term relationship is beyond hard, but it’s way harder to stay with someone who doesn’t love you the same way you love them.
Think about it and save your heart from an awful pain that could break it.
