¿Cuánto tiempo te ignorará un narcisista? (+Por qué lo hace y cómo hacer que deje de hacerlo)
Cuando una persona normal te da el tratamiento silencioso, it probably means that they’re too hurt to even talk to you or that they’re trying to go no contact. But when a narcissist behaves like this, it’s just one of their manipulation techniques.
However, being aware of why they do it doesn’t make you feel any better. Being familiar with this doesn’t give you the answer to the question, “How long will a narcissist ignore you?”
Well, luckily, I will. And that’s not all, folks. You’ll also get a tutorial on how to act when this starts happening.
¿Cuánto tiempo te ignorará un narcisista?
Nadie puede darte el número exacto de días que un narcisista te ignorará. Sin embargo, una cosa es segura: el tratamiento del silencio narcisista acabarán por detenerse, y tarde o temprano intentarán volver a tu vida.
A person with a narcissistic personality disorder will ignore you as long as it suits them. They will stop when they decide that your punishment is over or when they think that they’ve regained control over you.
The answer to the question, “How long will a narcissist ignore you?” also depends on the stage your relationship is in. If you two have just started dating, it’s safe to say they’ll reach out in two weeks max.
At this point, a narcissist knows that they can’t afford to ignore you for too long. After all, they’re not sure whether you’re hooked on them completely or not. What if you fall out of love with them while they’re gone and refuse to let them back in?
On the other hand, if this is a long-term relationship, the silent treatment might last up to three months. At this point, they’re certain that you’re not going anywhere and that they can come back to you whenever they please, so they abuse this privilege.
11 razones por las que un narcisista te ignora
To figure out “How long will a narcissist ignore you?” you have to understand why they do it in the first place. This applies to all people with NPD, including your narcissistic partner, padre narcisistahermano, mejor amigo, compañero de trabajo, etc.
1. Parte del abuso narcisista
It doesn’t matter if you’ve seen some of the other red flags or not, every life coach and relationship expert will tell you that the silent treatment alone is enough for someone to be classified as an emotional abuser. This doesn’t mean that normal people don’t ignore their loved ones from time to time, but what differentiates this from narcissistic behavior is why they do it.
Un narco te ignora deliberadamente como parte de su abuso narcisista. They’re perfectly aware that this treatment is hurting you, and they continue to do it despite that.
Actually, to be clear, that’s exactly why gente tóxica do it – because it is a way to hurt you!
2. Devaluar su valor
¿Acaso no valgo lo suficiente para que me hablen? ¿Qué he hecho mal para que me traten así? ¿Realmente merezco este tipo de trato?
¿Cuántas veces se te han pasado por la cabeza estos pensamientos y otros similares? Pues bien, la primera vez que te hiciste alguna de estas preguntas fue el momento en que el narco logró su propósito.
Su objetivo es devaluar tu valía, de una forma u otra. E ignorarte acabará por destruir tu bienestar mental y sentimiento de autoestima.
This is the message a narcissist is trying to send you: “You’re not worthy of my reaction. You’re not worthy of me, a supreme human being, even talking to you, let alone anything else.”
They hope that this silent treatment will destroy your self-confidence and convince you that you’re good for nothing.
3. Para castigarte
Everyone with a narcissistic personality disorder feels a sense of entitlement. Basically, they’re entitled to do whatever they want, and everyone else is just there to do as they’re told.
Así que, cuando te atreves a romper sus reglas imaginarias y les das lesión narcisista, all hell will break loose. Sometimes, they’ll throw a temper tantrum, and sometimes, they’ll ignore you “to teach you a lesson.”
Their sick, twisted mind thinks they’re doing you a favor by behaving like this. They’re teaching how you should behave. They’re showing you what is acceptable and what they will not tolerate.
The worst thing is that, in most cases, they will actually succeed. The last thing you want is for them to shut down again, so you’ll bow your head and do what you’re told – just so you don’t have to go through this agony again.
Before you know it, they’ve trained you to behave as they please.
4. Aumentar sus niveles de estrés
It doesn’t matter how long will a narcissist ignore you – even if it lasts a couple of hours, it will stress you out. And that’s perfectly normal – after all, this is someone you love, and you can’t stand them not talking to you out of the blue.
Well, that’s exactly what they want to achieve: to raise your stress levels. You’ll be nervous and anxious while this is happening, and you’ll wrongly assume that you feel this way because you can’t live without them. Of course, all of that will increase your vínculo traumático.
Let me tell you that this is just one of their manipulation tactics to ruin your mental health. They’re deliberately doing this to make you sentirse codependiente.
At this point, you’re ready to do whatever it takes just to get rid of this awful feeling. And if that means begging for a narc to come back, that’s exactly what you’re about to do.
5. Para obtener una reacción
There is one thing no narcissist can live without: attention. The only way for them to feel important is by getting their victim’s reaction.
After all, that’s why they do all of this. If you’d stay numb to their attempts, they would move on to someone else in no time.
Basically, it doesn’t matter how you’ll react to this juego pasivo-agresivo, as long as you give them some kind of reaction. You might cry, get angry, or even try making them jealous – it doesn’t matter as far as they’re concerned.
The only thing that matters to a covert narcissist is to feel powerful over their victim. Your reaction is what gives them control over you – and that’s exactly what they’ve been trying to get all this time.
6. Causar drama
People with NPD will never admit to being guilty of manipulation, passive-aggressive behavior, and other forms of emotional abuse. On the contrary, they’ll do their best to switch roles and make you the bad guy.
Te provocan, te golpean por debajo del cinturón y utilizan métodos furtivos para hacerte daño. Y luego, cuando pierdes los nervios, te acusan de exagerar y de estar loco.
At the same time, they won’t hesitate to tell you that you misinterpreted everything and that things didn’t happen the way you think they did. Right there, you have a textbook example of the método de manipulación llamado gaslighting.
Lo mismo ocurre cuando te ignoran. Te llevan al límite y ven cómo te vuelves loco, lo cual es una reacción perfectamente normal.
Sin embargo, that’s when they accuse you of creating drama. Of course, they’ll pretend like they can’t stand it, while they actually enjoy every minute of drama in your relación tóxica.
Te dicen que sólo querían evitar una pelea cuando ambos sabéis que en realidad te estaban dando largas a propósito.
7. Parte de su juego de frío y calor
Every narc loves playing games. At first, they’ll bomba de amor you. After that, there comes ghosting, followed by the big return. Of course, things don’t end there – instead, this is just the beginning of an endless cycle of abuse that ends with your salud mental destruida.
Well, if you’re wondering, “How long will a narcissist ignore you?” the answer is – until they’re ready for the next phase in this juego frío y caliente.
If you ask them, they’re doing this to keep the spark in your relationship alive. Of course, this is not how normal people think, and that’s one of the reasons they’re far from normal.
The bottom line is that they’re ignoring you to make the relationship more exciting when you two get back together.
8. Impacto del nuevo suministro
Even though I’m sure you see this as the worst possible scenario, tu narco encontrando la proxima victima adecuada es en realidad una bendicion disfrazada para ti. Tough break for this new person, but as far as you’re concerned, it’s a great thing because it means that you’re off the hook.
What I’m trying to tell you is that it’s possible a narcissist is ignoring you because they’ve found a new supply. They’re practicing triangulation and are dragging a new, innocent person into your mess on purpose.
9. Sentirse querido y necesitado
Si you’re an empath, you’re the one who can give a narc exactly what they want: love, affection, and compassion. Even though they hide it, all narcissists are addicted to all of this.
Sin embargo, en el momento en que sienten el más mínimo rastro de abandono emocional, they start ignoring you – just to test your love for them. Basically, they panic at the mere thought of you not loving them anymore, so they make a big fuss just to assure themselves that this is not true.
En el momento en que te ven con el corazón roto por algo que hicieron, vuelven a sentirse deseados y necesitados.
10. You’ve figured them out
If a narc realizes that their victim has them all figured out, it’s the end of their world. Therefore, if you get to the bottom of their behavior, it’s quite possible that they’re actually running away from you because they felt exposed and vulnerable.
En este caso, un narcisista no tiene ni idea de qué hacer. Their manipulation tactics are obviously not working, and they can’t lure you back into their trap.
Basically, the only thing they can do is disappear. But don’t worry, they’ll come back sooner or later – they just need some more time to reorganize themselves and come up with a new strategy to play you once again.
11. Porque pueden
This might sound harsh, but at the end of the day, you’re enabling narcissistic behavior. Of course, I’m not talking about physically relaciones abusivas donde temes por tu vida y estás demasiado asustado para pensar en irte.
However, in all other cases, you’re letting them get away with all of this. They come back after ignoring you for some time, and you welcome them with open arms.
So, what prevents a narcissist from repeating the entire cycle when they feel like it? You’re clearly not planning to leave this narcissistic relationship, and they never feel any consequences for their actions.
6 maneras de hacer que un narcisista deje de ignorarte
Now that you know the answer to the question, “How long will a narcissist ignore you?” you’re wondering how to make it stop. Well, trust me, after you apply some of these methods, you’ll hear from them the next day.
1. Entender sus razones
Antes de actuar, primero tienes que averiguar cuáles de las razones por las que un narcisista te ignora mencionadas anteriormente se aplican a tu agresor.
You can’t succeed in anything until you understand whether they’re doing this to punish you for something, to regain control, or if this is just part of their ciclo del abuso emocional.
I know that finding the core reason is not the easiest job in the world. Here’s a tip to do it right: forget about your feelings for this person.
Pretend that you’re nothing but a passive bystander in this narcissistic relationship. How would you classify your narcisista encubierto? What would you say is the reason they’re acting the way they are?
2. Reflejar a un narcisista
En pocas palabras, reflejando a un narcisista means treating them how they treat you. This is difficult to achieve for normal people, especially if we’re talking about a narc you care for deeply, despite everything. However, en la mayoría de los casos, este es el único lenguaje que hablan y entienden las personas con NPD.
Basically, if they’re gaslighting you, you gaslight them back. If they’re love bombing you, you love bomb them back. And, of course, if they’re giving you the silent treatment, you ignore them back.
This will leave a narcissist confused and lost. You’ll ser más listo que ellos, and that’s exactly where you want them to be.
3. Trabaja tu autoestima
Remember we talked about your abuser wanting to destroy your sense of self-worth at all costs, and that is why they’re ignoring you in the first place? Well, it’s your job to prove them wrong.
Y qué mejor manera de hacerlo que trabajar la autoestima? Demuéstrale a tu narcisista y, sobre todo, a ti mismo que su valor doesn’t depend on their presence in your life.
You are capable of being happy and self-confident without them around. They didn’t succeed in convincing you that you’re worthless or good enough and your self-image won’t change just because they woke up in the morning and decided to ignore you.
4. Don’t fall into the blame game trap
Be careful because every narcissist will do their best to make you think that you’re responsible for this mess. According to this view, they would never ignore you if you treated them differently.
Todo es culpa tuya porque tú les has provocado. ¿Te suena?
Tengo que advertirte que un narco continuará jugar al juego de la culpa. Please, don’t fall for it – it’s a trap.
5. Don’t act like you’re clueless
Here’s another thing you shouldn’t be doing while a narcissist is ignoring you: pretending to be clueless. Don’t act like you have no idea what they’re doing and, most importantly, what they’re trying to achieve.
Instead, don’t be afraid to speak your mind. Call them out on their actions and show them that you’re perfectly aware of everything that’s been going on. Trust me: that will shock them more than anything else.
Significa que su tapadera ha sido descubierta y que tienen que idear nuevas estrategias.
6. Actuar sin molestar
Finally, the key is to act completely unbothered by everything that has happened. It’s okay to say you’re hurt if someone is ignoring you. However, that doesn’t mean that your life is over.
Even though I know you’re hurting, please pretend to be completely unmoved and untouched by their behavior. Don’t give them what they want – attention and proof that they’ve made a serious impact on you.
En lugar de enviarles párrafos larguísimos y rogarles que hablen contigo, déjalos estar. En lugar de acosarles y pedirles explicaciones, seguir adelante sin cerrar!
Trust me when I tell you that this is what will hurt them most. Once your narc sees that you couldn’t care less about their silent treatment, they’ll be at your doorstep the next day.
Qué hacer si un narcisista te ignora
Lo mejor que puedes hacer cuando un narcisista te ignora es ignorarle tú también. If you act like it’s the end of the world, you’re just giving them the green light to continue. You’re making them feel important and giving them validation.
On the other hand, if you act like you’re completely unbothered by them stonewalling you, you cease to be their source of narcissistic supply.
¿Se vuelve loco un narcisista cuando lo ignoras?
Sí, no hay nada que pueda volver loco a un narcisista more than running into someone who doesn’t only have them figured out but also has the ability to beat them at their own game. Ignoring a narcissist means giving them zero attention, and let’s not forget that they can’t live without getting attention.
Basically, when you ignore them, you’re doing what they wanted to do to you: you’re destroying their sense of self-worth and deepening their trauma bond.
Even though this is not something you should be doing with normal people, sadly, sometimes, it’s frequently the only technique to get at least some revenge on your narcissist.
¿Qué hacer cuando un narcisista te da el tratamiento del silencio?
Lo mejor que se puede hacer cuando un narcisista te ignora es darle exactamente lo que obviamente quería e irse ningún contacto. But going no contact doesn’t only include phone calls and mensajes de texto.
It means you don’t respond to their attempts to reach out, and most importantly, you ignore their flying monkeys (the people a narc uses to do the bullying for them), and you don’t stalk their social media. You disappear from their life, sit back, and watch them desperately trying to crawl back into yours.
Also, remember that this has to be an act of ghosting. You won’t achieve anything if you announce you’re leaving or give them an explanation for it.
Para terminar:
Don’t be focused on trying to figure out, “How long will a narcissist ignore you?” As long as you sit and count the days from the last time they replied to your text messages, it means that your focus is still on them. And trust me, they feel it and see it as encouragement to keep up with the good work.
En su lugar, trabaja en las tácticas que te ayudarán a herir emocionalmente a tu narcisista.
Look, don’t get me wrong – I assure you that I’m not telling you that this is the right way to act. On the contrary, the only smart thing to do would be to escape this toxic relationship without ever looking back.
In fact, this is the only way to get out of this cycle of abuse once and for all. I won’t lie to you: by doing all of the things mentioned above, you’re only dragging yourself deeper into this mud you’ve ended up in.
Sin embargo, sé que decirle a alguien que marcharse is much easier said than done. I’m perfectly aware that you’ve already chosen your path and that you’ve decided to continue with these games.
I know I can’t change your mind, so I’d rather give you instructions to show your abuser cómo se juega!
