Do you know that feeling when you’re not sure whether he’s looking at you from a distance or looking through you? I’m sure all of you, fellow women, have experienced this “phenomenon” at least once in your life.
Honestly, why do guys do it? Has looking at someone from a distance become a new method of seducing that we, women, aren’t aware of?
Okay, enough questions for today. It’s time to get some answers!
Below you’ll find all the possible reasons why he keeps looking at you from a distance and how you can test whether he’s attracted to you or not.
He Keeps Looking At Me From A Distance: 15 Most Common Reasons Why
When a guy stares at you from a distance, this can be quite uncomfortable and confusing. Worry not, here are the most common reasons why guys do it:
1. He has a crush on you
Oh yes. In 99.99% of cases, when a guy stares at you, it means a guy likes you. Period. Okay, maybe not in that percentage, but 80% would be reasonable.
Do you know how I know this? Because we all do it. Crush stares are the most famous stares in the world (no matter how weird that sounds).
When we like someone, we can’t help but look at them, mostly from a distance, because being in close proximity to them would kill us. 😂
I know for a fact that I had trouble breathing next to my crush, so it’s no wonder many people choose to stare at their crushes before making a move. So, yes, him staring at you is one of the signs he has a secret crush on you.
This beautiful crush quote explains it perfectly: “When I see you, I admit I start to lose my grip and all of my cool.” – Kara Dioguardi & Patrik Jens Berger
2. He likes you, but he thinks you’re out of his league
Sometimes, when a guy looks at you, it’s because he’s attracted to you, but he’s scared that you’re too good for him.
In other words, he thinks you’re out of his league, so he doesn’t dare do anything but stare at you from a distance.
What’s happening in his brain is an eternal battle filled with these questions: Should I approach her or not? What if she rejects me? What if…
If you like him too, you can help him make a move by smiling at him. Maybe that’s the green light he’s been waiting for to approach you. I’ve tried this, my friends have tried this, and it worked in all cases.
3. He’s trying to get to know you better from a distance
They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. By just observing you and the little things that you do, he can learn a million things about you.
Your posture, body language, facial expressions, and other things can tell him a lot about your personality, your current mood, profession, and other things.
If he has that curious facial expression spiced up with a smile, then you know he’s trying to get to know you better before he’s ready to eventually approach you.
Additionally, when guys are totally mesmerized by you, they can’t help but observe everything you do. Simply watching you carrying groceries is interesting to them. Yup.
4. He’s flirting with you from a safe distance
Did you know that when a man stares at you, this can also be interpreted as a sign he’s flirting with you? Eyes are one of the main flirting tools, so it’s no wonder that staring, in most cases, actually means flirting.
Imagine a girl sitting in a bar and a guy observing her from his corner and giving her those flirty looks. We all know what happens next. If she’s interested, she smiles at him, and he plucks up the courage to approach her.
If she’s not interested, she looks away, and he stops staring at her. In some cases, guys don’t stop staring at you because they think you’re just playing hard to get.
How will you know that he’s flirting with you?
Trust me, you’ll know. When a guy is interested in you, he exhibits positive body language. Literally, his soul smiles just at the sight of you. That sounded really poetic, right? 🤔
5. He’s waiting for you to make the first move
Do you think him staring at you because he’s waiting for you to make the first move is a valid reason? I don’t know about you, but I, as a woman, don’t have a problem approaching guys first if I like them.
Of course, before doing that, I would first wait for a few subtle signs he likes me too. These subtle signs include him smiling and staring at me.
Also, if I notice that he’s a little bit shy, I immediately enter “chase him” mode, but that’s just me. I’m not saying that this method is 100% flawless, but it works.
However, it doesn’t work if a guy who is staring at you is a legit commitment-phobe who doesn’t know what he wants. In that case, I don’t recommend making the first move but letting him do all the work (if he wants to).
6. He’s a shy guy (self-explanatory)
Does he stare at you, and when you stare at him, he looks away? This is a clear sign that he’s a shy guy (probably an introvert too). A shy kind of person will spend a lot of time observing someone they like from a safe distance.
Prolonged eye contact is out of the question. When they’re caught staring, they immediately redirect their focus elsewhere. (That’s how you know they’re shy.)
The truth is some women misinterpret the signs of a shy guy. When he looks away, they think he’s not interested and that he’s probably playing with them.
If you notice that he’s reserved around others and is not that talkative, then you can be sure he’s a legit shy guy, and no, he’s not playing with you.
He’s just waiting for you to confirm that you like him. So, will you? You can do so by staring at him as well but without looking away when he looks at you.
7. He’s intimidated by you
When a guy is intimidated by you, it could be that he has low self-esteem or thinks you’re out of his league. All in all, there is something about you that makes him think that he’s not good enough for you.
Thinking about approaching you causes him anxiety because he likes you but is scared of being rejected or laughed at. So, what’s the only thing left for him to do? Stare at you, of course! 🤣
If a guy is intimidated by you, chances are he won’t reach out to you. The best thing about this is that you don’t need guys who are intimidated by you in your life.
They will always seek validation from you, and it will be impossible to establish a meaningful connection with them because of their assumption that you’re too good for them.
If he’s intimidated by you, just let him stare until he finds the courage to make a move. To do that, he’ll have to work on himself to become “worthy of being with you.”
8. He’s actually looking through you
Sometimes, guys aren’t actually looking at you from a distance but looking through you. It means that he’s thinking about a third thing that isn’t connected with you. It just happened that you were there in his proximity during his “mental session.”
Maybe he’s thinking about his girlfriend, his job, what he’s going to eat, you name it. It could be anything, and it definitely doesn’t matter.
What matters is that he’s looking through you because he’s lost in thought. To know for sure that this is the case, just pay attention to his facial expression and eyes.
Does he look absent, and are his eyes not actually directed at you specifically but focused on one point? If yes, then you know he’s looking through you.
9. He mistook you for someone else
He keeps looking at me from a distance. Hmm… Well, how do you know that he hasn’t mistaken you for someone else? Here’s how I know.
When a guy mistakes you for someone else, he’ll look at you for a while until his brain tells him that you’re the wrong person. Then he’ll laugh at himself and his bad evaluation.
Just wait for the laughing part, and you’ll know whether he mistook you for someone else or not. Also, sometimes guys decide to tell you that they mistook you for someone close to them.
If you want him to approach you, I suggest also staring at him, which will make him uncomfortable. He’ll feel kind of obliged to let you know why he was staring at you in the first place.
Keep in mind that sometimes guys do this on purpose. It’s one of the approach tactics they use when they’re not sure whether you like them or not.
They will tell you that they mistook you for someone else and then ask you out or ask for your name so that they can follow you on social media.
10. He’s a legit creep
If you’ve watched that popular TV show “You,” then you know what I’m talking about. Okay, we won’t go to such lengths to say that he could be a murderer, but you never know.
He wants to know everything about your life, so staring at you while you’re doing even the most mundane chores will work for him.
Creeps could be in your neighborhood, at work, total strangers, and even your exes. (The exes category is definitely a topic in itself.)
11. He’s playing mind games
Now you’re probably wondering: How is he trying to take control of me from a distance? Well, it’s possible.
Do you know that game where two people look at each other in silence and the loser is the one who suddenly starts laughing?
The same thing applies to eye contact. Some men see it as a game where they try to control you. So, he’ll keep staring at you on purpose only to make you feel uncomfortable.
If you can’t maintain eye contact with him and feel nervous, he’ll think that he’s won. Why would he do that, right? Some men enjoy playing mind games, and yes, they enjoy feeling like winners.
12. He’s trying to exhibit his dominant side
There are men (and also women) who enjoy being dominant in every sense of its meaning. Because of that, they use every opportunity to show off their dominant side.
When it comes to men, they do it primarily to impress a woman and attract her. So, he keeps looking at you from a distance because he’s deeply attracted to you.
He wants to sweep you off your feet by showing off his masculine, dominant side. Also, by doing this, he’s letting you know that he’s a confident guy.
Let’s be honest. There isn’t a single woman in the world who doesn’t fall for confident men. Their vibe is utterly contagious regardless of whether they’re next to you or looking at you from a distance.
13. He’s your ex who still has feelings for you
He keeps looking at me from a distance. Wait, is the man looking at you from a distance actually your ex?
If yes, then chances are he still hasn’t moved on and has feelings for you. Also, it could be that he’s trying to figure out whether you’re happy without him.
He’s doing this from a safe distance because he doesn’t want you to notice that he’s staring at you. Remember one thing: When a man finds out that his ex is doing great without him, he wants her back.
It’s like he’s trying to regain his self-confidence and self-worth by winning you over again. If your ex still has feelings for you, it’s up to you to decide whether this is a good sign or not-so-good.
14. He’s TOO confident and self-absorbed
Last but not least. The reason why a guy keeps staring at you is that sometimes he’s overly confident and self-absorbed. He’s not really interested in you, but he’s only interested in showing off his egocentric side.
Truth be told, he probably isn’t even aware of what exactly he’s doing. If you ask me, such men aren’t really confident. I call it fake confidence.
When you feel the constant urge to show off in front of others, it means that you aren’t really confident. By doing this, he’s actually trying to boost his self-esteem.
PRO TIP: Run away from men who are too confident and self-absorbed. It’s not your job to save them.
More Things To Consider When A Guy Is Staring At You From A Distance
When a guy is staring at you from a distance, there are many other factors that you need to take into account, such as:
His body language.
• Eye contact: Look out for how often he glances at you and for how long. If it lasts more than a few seconds, this is a clear sign of interest.
The eyes never lie. Also, if you happen to be near him, pay attention to his pupils. If they are dilated, then you know for sure that he’s attracted to you. Needless to say, when a man avoids eye contact, it usually means he’s not interested (unless he’s shy).
• Facial expression: Does his face tell you that he’s lost, anxious, or just happy to look at you from a distance? Pay attention to his facial expression, and you’ll discover his true intentions. If he looks confused, chances are that he’s anxious about making a move, or he’s mistaken you for someone else.
• His stance: The psychology of body language claims that we subconsciously point our feet to the object of our attention (or affection). If his feet are pointed toward you, then you know he’s thinking about you. However, if his feet are pointed somewhere else, then he’s also there mentally.
• His arms: If his arms are crossed, this suggests defensive, self-protective mode. Maybe he’s worried about being rejected by you if he decides to make a move. If his hands are on his hips, it means he’s in control and ready to pursue you.
Your current relationship with him (if you know him).
Is this the first time you’ve ever seen him? Is he your ex? Is he someone you know or a complete stranger? Your current relationship with him can help you determine his intentions.
If he’s your ex, chances are he’s interested in what’s going on in your life, and perhaps he secretly wants to get back together with you. If he’s a complete stranger, you probably caught his attention, and now he’s thinking of ways to approach you.
If he’s someone you know, then this is a great thing because you can teasingly ask him why he stared at you that day. I suggest doing this via text because it’s less painful.
Location also plays a great part in interpreting their intentions. If a guy stares at you at a bar or in a pub, then you can be sure he’s subtly flirting with you.
In this case, you can wait for him to make a move, or you can be the one who initiates conversation (assuming you like him back).
If he’s staring at you in church, the workplace, or similar, then you should think twice before staring back at him. In such instances, reciprocating is not recommended because of the not-so-appropriate setting.
Is he alone or with someone?
He keeps looking at me from a distance. But wait, is he alone, with his coworkers, or his best friends? Or is he with his girlfriend?
If he’s with his friends, then pay attention to whether they’re teasing him. If yes, chances are they know he’s into you, and now they’re mocking him for staring at you.
If he’s with his girlfriend, then be the better person and don’t stare back. If he doesn’t respect her, there’s no need for you to approve of his behavior.
If he’s alone, then yes, he’s probably an alpha male waiting for the right time to make a move. Well, you can accelerate all this by giving him a flirty smile.
The Mirroring Test: Is He Attracted To You Or Not?
I’m sure the biggest dilemma for every woman when it comes to this is: Is he staring at me because he’s attracted to me, or is there something else at play?
Here’s how you can know what exactly is going on here. I’m talking about a quick test called “mirroring your actions.”
Simply put, when we’re attracted and connected to someone, we tend to mirror their actions/gestures. For example, if I touch my ear, forehead, or hair while talking to a guy, chances are he’ll do the same if he’s connected/attracted to me.
This happens on a subconscious level, which means we’re not aware of doing it. So, I suggest you do the same when he’s looking at you from a distance.
Touch your hair, place your hand somewhere, or do anything else only to see if he’ll do the same thing. If he does, then he’s mirroring your actions because he’s totally focused on you, which is one of the truest signs of attraction.
Is the question He keeps looking at me from a distance still bothering you? There’s no need for you to overthink it. I’m sure the reason he’s staring at you is one of the common ones explained above.
All in all, you shouldn’t worry much about it but pay attention to his body language, do a quick test, and just wait. In most cases, he’ll either approach you or keep staring at you.
Don’t shy away from making the first move (especially if he’s a shy guy). Men love when a woman takes the initiative because it shows that you ooze confidence.
After all, you’ve got nothing to lose. Better to approach first than to overthink. (I like this one. 🤔)